Lysandra’s hands quivered, a rarefied phenomenon, the woman glancing down as they convulsed before sliding them into the pockets of her white coat, attempting, but unsuccessful in pursuit, to ensconce this weakness within in. She couldn’t let anyone, especially Seth, a coworker, to witness this side of her, this complicated, messy side that she desired to abandon since journeying to Portchester. After a brief interlude, Lysandra pulled her hair into a ponytail and aligned the creased in her scrubs, palms smearing any evidence of this recent breakdown. And just like that, the storm was over, the rain had ceased and the sun was out, or some semblance of the sun, Lysandra was the moon, or the stars, or something such as this, but not the sun, never the sun, despite her honeyed locks. No, that was her other sisters, Lysandra was callous in essence, one of the reasons she orbited around Tess, because they comprehended the damage within each other and they didn’t try and mend it, nor discount it, they just acknowledged that yes, they might be what society categorized as shitty people, and they might’ve hurt people in the past, but they were trying, not always their best, as Seth had put it, but they were trying. She ducked her head, rotating so Seth was no longer a bystander, this wasn’t his burden and Lysandra would be damned if she let him anguish over her and knowing him, he would. “I get off in an hour… um… when do you? I mean, do you want to get a drink?” There were times since meeting Seth that Lysandra was certain she did absolutely nothing to deserve this man in his life, whether he be a friend or anything else, but still, he was here, brimming with tender eyes and tender hands to match and a puppy like demeanour that Lysandra hadn’t witnessed since she was in high school and Charleston Flanders had a crush on her. He was a grade above her and donned bifocals and brought her flowers every week, fresh flowers from his mother’s garden and Lysandra didn’t deserve any goodness then, so she certainly didn’t deserve it now. “Come on Cartwright, don’t make me drink alone.” She was back to “herself” again, as if someone had flipped a switch, but she was still sniffling and she still felt as if the world was crumbling around her and all she could do is stand and regard as such things she once held dear was demolished, but she had journeyed this far alone, it was what she was used to, aloneness and perhaps, she wasn’t aware there was another path, standing right in front of her. She matched his gaze, sage hues plunging into blue, like an ocean with its tremulous waves, innocuous, receding from the shore, back to its maker, as her breathing grew heavy, they were in close proximity.
It was her mannerisms: the way her voice was so slightly shaken, the way her eyes averted his, her sense of emotion that seemed to be wrecked in one second and perfectly controlled the next that confused Seth. He wanted to understand what she was going through, to somehow empathize with her, but he knew that what she was going through was a situation he could never fully comprehend. Sure, he had been through a handful of terrible things in his life, but nothing that came close to matching the pain the woman was facing at the moment. He knew all he could do was sit there, let her know that she had someone else around her, another who was breathing in the same air and her life was viable and real and it was going to be okay. In an instant, it seemed as if she had suddenly found the solution to the problem and she was okay. For a second, he felt relieved that she was in a better state, but he knew, he could feel some sort of unspoken tension resting between their two souls that hinted that it wasn’t alright, but a mask was somehow put over the problem and if the pretended, everything would somehow magically disappear. “Yeah, sure.” his words came out quick, maybe a bit too fast, but he was still so worried about her and unsure of how to deal with the feelings the were currently welled up inside of him. Within seconds, it felt like their banter was back to normal, but there was an underlying feeling stuck between the two, in some unknown space that their hearts seemed to be stuck in. “Well, when you put it like that, how could I not?” He questioned, quirking an eyebrow, trying to get the girl to smile somehow. Somehow, in the silence, it felt comfortable, like it was somehow supposed to feel that way all along. His eyes, the oceanic hues, gazed into her’s, like waves crashing into one another. The hallway was silent, the only sound was the two’s breathing, but the emotion was palpable. “I’m here.” he whispered, his forehead closing the gap between the two. “I’m right here.”
