Summary: An unexpected reunion catches you off guard.
Content Warnings: None, just Fluff
Author’s Note: A bonus chapter to officially wrap up this series. At this time, I don’t have any other stories in the works. So I’ll be taking a little writing break until I come across something inspiring. With everything TOP has planned, I am sure inspiration will strike at some point. Thank you all for reading🩵
6 years later…
You’re standing outside a park entrance with your dog on Jeju island waiting for Seunghyun to join you. He went to grab coffee from a shop around the corner so you could have an afternoon together as a family. Suddenly, you hear the squeal of a tiny voice and footsteps barreling towards you.
You turn to see a young girl, about three years old, running towards you with outstretched arms. “A doggie!”
She’s followed by who you assume is her brother, a boy around the age of five.
You immediately crouch down to catch her. “Woah there little one. It’s never safe to run up on a dog. You never know if they’re friendly or not.”
“See? I told you!” The boy scolds. “Not all dogs are friendly.”
“I am so sorry.” A woman, presumably her mother says, walking swiftly towards you. “We were in the shop and she got away from me as I was paying…she just loves dogs and I’m not as quick on my feet when my hands are full…”
You smile warmly back, noting the sleeping child in her arms. “This is Rembrandt. You can call him Remy.”
“I’m Ji-An.” She smiles.
“It’s nice to meet you.” You smile as you help the little girl get properly acquainted with your Shiba. “If you ask your mom you can play with him here in the park.”
“Pleeeeeaaaassse Eomma?” Ji-An begs.
“If it’s okay with…”
“Y/N.” You reply warmly.
“If it’s okay with Y/N we can wait here for Appa. But take your brother with you.” She adds as you hand the children a ball. “I’m Chae-Yeon by the way.”
They follow you into the park, the two children running off to play, while you and Chae-Yeon take a seat on the bench.
“Are you here on vacation?” You inquire looking towards the entrance for your husband.
“We live here.” Chae-Yeon smiles. “It’s quiet, away from the city. Just how we like it. What about you?”
“Vacation. My husband is a producer and I run my own dance studio so it’s nice to disconnect every now and then. But we love the hustle and bustle of Seoul.”
“My husband and I prefer the opposite. He was once in entertainment and I was a museum curator. Now, I’m a full time mom and loving every moment.” She laughs, shifting the child in her arms.
“I can hold her if you’d like a break.” You smile. “It seems like you have your hands full.” Chae-Yeon passes the baby to you with appreciation. You take in their tiny features.
“It’s the most fulfilling thing I’ve ever done…but being a mom of four out and about is difficult sometimes.” She exhales. “Just not enough hands.”
“Four?” You say surprised.
“Twins. My husband has the other one. He went to the bakery nearby for the kids.”
“It sounds like the two of you make a good team.”
Chae-Yeon smiles. “We do. We just…click. We got married within three months of meeting. It just felt right. We both wanted a big family, so we got started right away.”
“You can’t deny connections like that.” You say, thinking of Seunghyun.
“Have you and your husband been together long?” She asks.
“Over 20 years in some capacity…”
“So the two of you have a connection too.” She smiles. You note her face lighting up at the recognition of only who you can assume is her husband. “As a matter of fact, here comes my husband now.”
“Making friends or trying to give our daughter away to a stranger?" The man jokes, placing a kiss on his wife’s cheek.
You freeze, it can’t be…
“This kind stranger so graciously gave my arms a break. Our oldest daughter got up close and personal with her shiba and the rest is history. We became fast friends.”
“We welcome any help we can get.” His laugh turns into a cough as turns to face you.
Jae stands before you. A bit older, hair longer, a baby in a carrier strapped to his chest, happy.
You look up, bouncing his child on your lap. “Hi Jae.”
His eyes are wide, caught off guard. Jae scans your left hand looking for a wedding ring. Fair, you think, it’s only natural that he would hope you ended up sad and alone.
“You know each other?” Chae-Yeon asks.
“We did.” You say, looking to him for the correct way to continue.
“This is…she and I…dated before I met you.” He stumbles on his words, looking to his wife.
Chae-Yeon looks back at you wide eyed. “Wait…you’re the one who left him all those years ago at TUDUM?”
“Guilty.” You say, awkwardly as you wonder where the conversation is headed.
Suddenly, Chae-Yeon pulls you into a hug. “Thank you. I owe this beautiful life to you. You made the right choice.”
You pull back and smile, still holding their baby. “This is a show of gratitude I was not expecting…”
“She’s right…” Jae begins. “I think we both know this wasn’t where our relationship was headed. Ending our relationship…”
As messy as it was…you think.
“It was the right thing to do.” Jae is quiet a moment then asks, “So…you’re here with your dog on vacation? Alone?”
Before you can answer you hear one of your favorite sounds echo across the park.
”Eomma! We found you!”
Jae looks surprised as your son runs towards you carrying a paper bag, Seunghyun not far behind.
“We got hotteok!” He grins, leaping onto the bench beside you.
“So that’s what took you so long to get here.” You smile, taking the bag. “You and your Appa love to sample a food stall…”
Seunghyun comes up beside you, handing you a coffee. ”Sorry for the delay. We took a detour.” He surveys the situation and clears his throat. “Um, it's good to see you Jae.”
Jae extends his hand. “Seunghyun…you’re…”
“Still around? Yeah. Not planning on going anywhere.”
Jae clears his throat as your son approaches him.
“Hello, I’m Taejoon.” He bows politely.
“Hello I’m…”
“This is Jae.” You add. “He’s…”
”An old friend.” Jae says, extending his hand to the boy. “It’s great to meet you. This is Chae-Yeon and this little one is Jungwoo, your mom has Ji-Ah, and over there playing with your dog is Ji-An and Ji-Woo.”
Taejoon looks towards Ji-An and Remy then to the baby on your lap. “You have a lot of kids.” Your son says without missing a beat.
Seunghyun takes a sip of his coffee, stifling a laugh before stating “Kids say the darndest things…”
Can I play with them?” Taejoon asks, changing the subject.
“Of course, go on.” You say encouragingly.
“He’s…yours?” Jae asks, watching him run off to play.
“I suppose it’s hard for you to believe, but yes. He’s our son.” Seunghyun adds, placing a protective hand on your shoulder.
He looks between you and Seunghyun as if he’s absorbing the reality that the two of you remained together after all this time. “I’m happy for you...really I am.”
Chae-Yeon picks up on the tension. “Seunghyun, why don’t we go check on the kids?” She grabs the baby from you with a hopeful smile.
You nod, signaling to your husband it’s okay to go.
“I think we both ended up where we belong.” Jae says quietly, sitting beside you on the bench. “I was angry for a long time, even after Chae and I got married…but when my son was born…”
“You realized your life was so much better without me.”
“Something like that…” Jae adds. “Chae loves kids and the countryside and this whole life we’ve built. It’s…”
“Everything you dreamed of.” You say, taking Jae’s hand, giving it a squeeze. “And I love the life Seunghyun and I have built. Like you, it’s everything I could’ve dreamed of.”
He nods, smiling. “I think I was angry because…you were right.”
His confession takes you off guard.
”I know…it was a shock for me too, but its the truth. We…weren’t compatible in the way that Chae and I are. Those things I said to you that day…you didn’t deserve it. I’m sorry.” Jae’s voice is sincere.
“I forgave you long ago, Jae. But thank you.”
“I wasn’t expecting this kind of reunion.” He sighs. “Running into you after all these years…I’m glad we were both able to come out on the other side.”
“Happy and whole.” You grin.
The two of you watch as Seunghyun approaches, out of breath from playing with the kids alongside Chae-Yeon. “Tag is a bit different when there's so many children involved.”
The three of you laugh.
“Not everyone is cut out for a team of children.” Chae-Yeon adds bouncing the baby on her hip. “I do envy the ease of having the right amount of hands to parent…But Jae and I like to have our hands full.”
Seunghyun takes a seat beside you, placing a comforting hand on your leg, knowing where your mind has wandered. The thought of two children. Taejoon playing with an older sibling…
“One child or ten, what’s important is working as a team with your partner.” Jae says, sensing your sadness. “I appreciate you sending the Hockeney piece.” He adds, changing the subject.
“It was rightfully yours...and our attempt at a peace offering.” You say, placing your hand on your husband’s.
”He’ll never admit it, but the day it arrived ranks up there with our wedding day and birth of our children.” Chae adds.
“Okay, that’s a bit dramatic…” Jae counters.
”You almost cried.” She adds.
”Let me guess, he has a framed photo of him with the painting as a kid hangin beside it?” You jest.
Chae-Yeon breaks out into laughter. “You would be correct.”
The awkwardness of meeting subsides and you all catch up on the past few years while the children play with Remy. Jay and Seunghyun talk about art curation while you and Chae-Yeon talk about life and motherhood. The conversations solidify the choices made years prior. These are the lives Jae and I deserve. Before you know it the sun is setting. As the four of you wrangle the children Jae leans in.
”I know I didn’t get it at the time but I’m glad we ended it…I’m glad we didn’t settle. And I’m glad you became the mom you deserved to be.”
Tears prick your eyes as you smile back at him appreciatively, then pull him into a hug. ”Me too. It was really good to see you Jae. I wish you all the best.”
”You too.” He says as his wife and kids return, thanking you for the time with Remy.
“It was a pleasure talking with you Y/N. If you all ever find yourselves in Jeju again, please reach out. We would be happy to host you at our home.”
”Please bring Remy too!” Ji-An adds.
“Of course.” Seunghyun smiles. “We will visit again soon.”
—————————-
On the walk back to the hotel, you walk Remy as Seunghyun grabs Taejoon, dramatically throwing him over his shoulders. Your son wraps his arms tightly around his father’s neck, riding piggy back.
His intense laughter brings a bright smile to your face as you lean into Seunghyun and release a sigh, processing the impromptu reunion.
“What’s the sigh for, Princess?” He asks, slinging his free arm around you.
”I’m just thinking how everything turned out just as it should.” You say looking up at your boys with pride. “Seeing him again with his wife and kids…”
”They have TOO MANY kids.” Taejoon says innocently.
Seunghyun chuckles. “More children than they have hands…but every family is perfect in its own way…”
Summery: She and Choi Seunghyun once shared a love that felt bulletproof, filling their late nights with whispered promises of marriage, a shared home, and a future family. But the dream shattered, ending in a painful breakup that left her completely hollow. The real devastation hit days later: a positive pregnancy test. Choosing to protect her fragile heart, she kept the secret to herself. Now, five years later, the past abruptly collides with the present. Walking through a crowded street, Seunghyun freezes as his eyes lock onto her—and the beautiful five-year-old child held tightly in her arms.
Anon request~
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The applause inside the Arena was deafening, a roaring wall of sound generated by thousands of screaming fans. Above the stage, the massive LED screens flashed the words Artist of the Yearin blinding gold lettering. Pyrotechnics shot into the air with a rhythmic, thunderous boom, leaving a haze of sweet-smelling smoke drifting across the front rows of the celebrity seating section.
On stage, Bigbang stood in a perfect, united line.
They were a constellation of effortless charisma under the harsh arena spotlights. Jiyong adjusted his sunglasses, stepping up to the microphone with a brilliant, wide grin to deliver the acceptance speech. Youngbae stood beside him, hands raised to the crowd in immense gratitude, while Daesung waved to the upper decks.
And standing right at the center of them all was Seunghyun.
He looked like pure royalty. He wore a structured, avant-garde designer suit jacket that accentuated his broad shoulders, his black hair swept back sharply from his forehead. He held the heavy gold trophy in his large, gloved hands, his expression intense and unreadable. He wasn’t a man who smiled easily in front of flashing cameras, but his towering presence alone drew the eye of every single person in the stadium. He looked entirely in his element—a god among idols.
And from your seat in the eighth row of the restricted VIP section, you watched him with a quiet, bittersweet smile resting on your lips.
You had been pushed to the side. It wasn't done maliciously; it was just the natural order of things. When you had arrived at the venue earlier that evening in the back of the tint-windowed van, the guys had been incredibly sweet. Seunghyun had kept his hand firmly resting on the small of your back as you navigated the frantic backstage corridors, and Youngbae had made sure you had the best VIP pass available.
But the moment the arena doors opened, reality set in.
You weren't part of Bigbang. You were just a member's girlfriend.
As the managers, the stylists, and the security detail swarmed the group to prep them for the broadcast, you had been gently, politely steered toward the designated seating area for staff and families. While Seunghyun was escorted to the front-row artist lounge where the cameras would constantly pan over his reactions, you were seated further back, tucked behind a row of prominent music producers and agency executives.
You were used to this.
In the grand, blinding ecosystem of his career, you were a quiet satellite orbiting a massive, burning sun. Their music, their fans, their brotherhood—it always came first. It had to. You had understood that the day you fell in love with him. You knew that loving Choi Seunghyun meant sharing him with millions of screaming voices, with a demanding label, and with three other men who held his soul just as tightly as you did.
So, you sat there. You didn't pout, you didn't check your phone every five seconds, and you didn't look resentful. You clapped until your palms were raw, genuinely proud of the historic milestone they had just achieved, even if that milestone meant watching him from thirty feet away through a sea of security guards.
On stage, Jiyong wrapped up the speech, and the stadium erupted into a fresh wave of cheers as the closing music began to play. The members began to bow, turning to walk down the stage steps toward the artist section.
As Seunghyun descended the stairs, his heavy brow furrowed. Despite the blinding flashes of the press photographers and the fans screaming his name from the barricades, his dark eyes immediately began to scan the crowd. He looked past the executives, past the security detail, until his gaze unerringly found you tucked away in your quiet row.
The sharp look he wore for the industry softened the exact millisecond his eyes met yours. A deep, weary vulnerability flickered in his expression—the look of a man who was completely exhausted by the noise. He offered you a tiny, almost imperceptible nod—a silent I see you, thank you for being here—before he was swept away by a wave of staff members guiding the group backstage.
The stadium felt like the morning after a war, empty and echoing with the ghosts of eighty thousand screaming voices. You sat there for a long moment, staring at the glittering sea of gold confetti catching the harsh, white clean-up lights that had just flickered on overhead. Your ears were still ringing, a dull, vibrating hum that made the sudden quiet of the arena feel heavy and surreal.
You took a deep breath, uncrossed your legs and reached down to gather your things. You zipped your jacket, slung your bag over your shoulder, and smoothed down your clothes, preparing yourself for the long, chaotic trek through the crowded exit.. You were just reaching into your bag to double-check for your keys when your phone buzzed aggressively against your palm.
The screen lit up, illuminating your face in the dimming row. It was a message from Seunghyun that read:
“Hey Jagiya, meet me in the Dressing room.''
You found your way down the hallway, the heavy bass from the arena still vibrating faintly through the concrete floors under your sneakers. Ahead, the corridor widened, and you spotted the familiar, imposing figures of the group's personal bodyguards. You walked over and bowed politely to them. They recognized you instantly, their stern expressions softening into respectful nods as they stepped aside, one of them reaching out to grip the heavy handle and silently open the door for you.
When you stepped inside, the room was a blur of high-energy motion. It was loud, chaotic, and crowded with the people who had built this empire. Hair stylists were packing away equipment, managers were talking rapidly into their phones, and clothing racks spilled over with glittering stage outfits. The boys were all scattered throughout the space, busy doing their own thing—laughing, wiping away sweat, and riding the high.
But the only person you cared about, the only person your eyes locked onto, was Seunghyun.
He was sitting on the edge of a leather sofa, looking thoroughly spent, but the moment his dark eyes found yours across the crowded room, his entire posture changed. You didn't care who was watching, and you didn't care about the staff around you. You ran over to him, the distance closing in seconds, and threw your arms around his neck, pulling him into a massive, breathless hug.
"Oh my god, I'm so proud of you," you breathed against his shoulder, burying your face in the heat of his neck.
Seunghyun’s arms locked around your waist instantly, wrapping around you with an intensity that practically lifted your feet off the floor. He held you closer, his large frame acting like a shield against the rest of the room. ''thank you" he whispered directly into your ear before pulling back just enough to press a warm kiss against the side of your head.
With his arm still settled heavily around your waist, anchoring you to his side, you turned toward the rest of the band members. "And to you guys also—congratulations, really. You were amazing."
They all smiled back at you, the collective tension of the historic night visibly lifting from their faces. Taeyang spoke first, stepping forward with a warm smile, his stage gear half-unbuttoned. "Thank you, Y/n. It means a lot that you came."
You looked at the energy vibrating through them, your smile widening. "Oh my god, you guys should be like, celebrating right now!"
Jiyong flashed a grin as he adjusted his hat. "Oh, trust me, we are."
Hearing that, you instinctively glanced around the spacious dressing room, looking for any signs of alcohol, popped champagne corks, or the usual messy setup of an immediate backstage party. But there was nothing. The tables held only standard water bottles, sports drinks, and half-eaten catering plates.
Before you could ask, Seunghyun’s grip on your waist tightened subtly. He cleared his throat, his voice dropping into that deep, gravelly register he used when he was trying to be gentle. "Um... the guys and I, we were actually going to go out and celebrate."
The moment the words left his mouth, your stomach dropped.
At home—in the quiet apartment you two shared away from the cameras—a beautifully prepared dinner was sitting on the dining table. You had spent hours cooking his favorite meal, meticulously timing everything so it would be perfect when you got back. You had bought a bottle of his absolute favorite vintage wine, which was currently sitting open on the counter, breathing and waiting for him. You had even carefully spread candles around the room, planning to light them the second you walked through the door to create a quiet, intimate sanctuary where the two of you could celebrate this massive milestone together.
But instead, he was going out with his friends.
A sharp wave of disappointment hit you, but right on its heels came the familiar, practiced wave of understanding. You knew who he was. You knew what this group meant to him. They had built this historic milestone from nothing, sweating and bleeding together for years, and they had achieved this night as a unit. They deserved to celebrate it themselves, as brothers who had survived the storm together.
So, drawing on a reservation of strength you had used a hundred times before, you forced a bright, seamless smile onto your face. You reached up, your hand resting against his broad chest, and patted it gently, trying to keep your voice completely light and unbothered.
"Alright, you guys have fun," you said, the words slipping out smoothly. "Don't stay out too late."
It was a phrase you said entirely without thinking at this point, a robotic script embedded in your mind because this exact scenario had happened many, many times before. The canceled plans, the late-night afterparties, the sudden changes due to schedule demands—it was the price of loving someone who belonged to the world.
Seunghyun looked down at you, his dark eyes searching your face for a lingering second, checking to see if the disappointment had broken through your armor. But your smile held steady. Relieved, he leaned down and gave you one more deeply loving, lingering kiss on the lips, a silent promise wrapped in the warmth of his mouth.
Turning away before the facade could crack, you offered one last wave to the members and walked out of the dressing room. The heavy doors shut behind you, instantly swallowing the sound of their laughter. You navigated the cold concrete hallways alone, passed the security guards and headed out into the cool night air, stepping into your car to take you back to the quiet and perfectly set home that you and Seunghyun shared.
When you did arrive home, you had methodically packed the untouched food into small containers. Even through the dull ache of disappointment, your muscle memory took over and you left little sticky notes with hand-drawn hearts on top of the plastic lids, putting them in the fridge before blowing out the candles. Grabbing the bottle of wine and a single glass, you retreated to the bedroom. Two glasses, maybe three—just enough to settle your racing thoughts, and pull you into a deep uninterrupted slumber.
You were entirely used to sleeping alone by now. His side of the bed was vacant more often than not, a cold expanse of sheets that had become a normal part of your routine. You could always tell when he finally made it back, though. Seunghyun was never majestic or graceful about his late-night arrivals. You would register the heavy, dragging sound of his tired footsteps on the hardwood, feel the entire mattress dip significantly under his weight as he plopped himself down with a exhausted sigh, and, most importantly, feel the immediate warmth of his large frame as he instinctively pulled you into his chest, holding you tightly as if he were terrified it might be the last time.
But that comfort never lasted long enough. Almost exactly an hour on the dot after he crawled into bed, your alarm would go off, forcing you to slip out of his grip and leave him alone in the mattress while you started your day.
And that was exactly what had happened again last night. Because you worked from home, he was never physically far from you during the day, yet the emotional distance felt miles wide despite sharing the exact same square footage.
But today, you had woke up feeling hopeful. Today, your alarm hadn't gone off to signal the start of another mundane workday; it had gone off so you could surprise him with breakfast. It was your anniversary. Six years. Six whole years of navigating the chaos of his career, the secrecy, and the lonely nights, and despite the hardships, you still wouldn't have traded a single second of it for anything else.
With a genuine smile on your face, you stood by the stove, flipping and finishing up his absolute favorite breakfast foods while the dining table sat perfectly set behind you. As you put the final touches on the plates, you shut off the burners and quietly sneaked back into the dim bedroom.
You climbed onto the mattress and straddled his hips, your movements waking him just enough to bring an immediate, sleepy smile to his face, though his eyes remained tightly closed. His large, heavy hands instinctively found your hips, his fingers gripping you gently.
Mmm... jagiya, what are you doing?" he mumbled, his voice thick, incredibly deep, and raspy from sleep and the night before.
You leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to the warm skin of his neck, whispering, "Good morning."
Seunghyun squinted one dark eye open, blindly turning his head toward the nightstand to check the digital clock. When he saw the numbers, a deep groan rumbled in his chest. "Jagiya... it's 10:00 AM," he groaned, his eyelids fluttering shut again.
You smiled against his skin, refusing to let your enthusiasm temper just yet. "I know, but I made breakfast," you hinted softly, pouring all your hope into those few words, desperately waiting for him to wake up enough to remember the significance of the date. To remember what today was.
Instead, Seunghyun simply rolled over onto his side, the sudden shift in weight making you lose your balance and fall onto the empty half of the bed. "Y/n, it's so early," he mumbled into his pillow, his voice muffled and dismissive. "Just let me sleep a little longer, alright?"
You sat up, your brows furrowing deeply as the warmth in your chest rapidly cooled into a sharp, biting frustration. Your patience, stretched thin. "But I made you—"
"I know, jagiya," Seunghyun interrupted blindly, his back turned to you as he pulled the duvet over his broad shoulders. "Please... just another two hours or so."
A cold, heavy silence filled the room. You huffed out a breath, throwing off the blankets as a suffocating wave of anger took over. Striding over to the closet, you yanked on a pair of jeans, threw on a jacket, and stormed out of the bedroom. Seunghyun, completely dead to the world and wrapped in his own exhaustion, didn't even realize you were mad.
You marched into the kitchen, the sight of the carefully arranged breakfast plates now making your chest burn with fury. Without hesitation, you grabbed the frying pan, threw it hard into the stainless steel sink with a loud, metallic clatter, and cranked the faucet on high. You watched the cold, rushing water flood over the fresh breakfast, completely ruining the food you had spent the morning cooking.
This was it. This was your absolute breaking point. After six years of being understanding, of being the one who waited, the one who packed away dinners, and the one who celebrated milestones alone, you couldn't hold it back anymore.
Snatching your keys off the kitchen counter, you stormed out of the apartment slamming the door shut behind you with a resounding, violent crash that echoed through the entire apartment.
The force of the slam vibrated through the walls, finally piercing through Seunghyun's deep sleep. His eyes snapped open, his head perking up from the pillow as a sudden, sharp spike of concern hit him. The absolute, dead silence of the apartment felt wrong.
He sat up quickly, the blankets falling around his waist as he called out into the empty rooms "...Y/n?"
But there was no response. The only sound was the faint hum of the refrigerator. You were already gone, heading down the elevator and out into the city streets, and he was left sitting alone in the dark bedroom, completely oblivious to the fact that he had already lost you.
On the way to your friend's house you had already sent her a message telling her she better already be up. She hadn't responded, but you didn't care. As you parked your car you went upstairs, not a care in the world if she was sleeping. Once you reached her door you typed in her keypad, getting it wrong at first. But then trying again, you got it wrong. You curse under your breath and squat down, getting a better look of the numbers when the door opened and there stood a very sleepy-looking Bomi, your best friend.
Her black hair stood in many different directions, her eyes squinting, and she was still in her pajamas. But technically, so were you.
"Y/n?" she asked.
But before you say anything, you move your way into her apartment, heading straight to the kitchen to make coffee. You didn't look all put together either. Yes, you were wearing jeans, but your top was clearly Hello Kitty pajamas and you were wearing slippers.
Bomi watched you with confusion as she rubbed her eyes, following you into the kitchen. "Everything ok babe?" she asked, sitting on the kitchen chair.
You press the button waiting for the coffee to brew and let it out. Let it all out.
"I made him breakfast. Fucking breakfast, like an idiot! I mean, what did I expect??? Did I really think he was going to actually get his ass up after he chose them over me AGAIN last night?!"
Bomi raises an eyebrow confused and tries to ask a question, but you kept going. She backs away, figuring you need to rant.
The coffee beeps and you pull out two mugs. "And he had the audacity to ask me to give him two more hours!" You scoffed as you poured you and Bomi a coffee and handed her her mug. "I mean, I would not be surprised if he forgot all together that today was our fucking anniversary."
Bomi took a sip, her eyebrows raising. "Oh shit, that's right. Happy anniversary."
You glare at your friend as she smiles nervously and takes a sip. You run a hand through your hair, still ranting. "And don't even get me started on our sex life!" You scoff. "I mean, the last time we had sex was like two weeks ago. It's just—"
You stop mid-sentence, the tiredness finally catching up to you. Bomi stands up and gives you a gentle hug, and that's when you finally let the tears fall. She rubs your back, being the supportive best friend she's always been since you two were kids.
"I know babe. I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry."
You sniffle into her shoulder, holding her tightly. "I don't deserve this. I really don't," your voice was muffled.
Your phone starts vibrating in your pocket, its sudden, frantic buzzing cutting right through the quiet of the kitchen. Stepping back from Bomi, you wipe the hot tears from your face with the back of your hand and pull the screen into view. The caller ID flashes with his name: Seunghyun. A fresh wave of bitter resolve hardens in your chest. You roughly slam the phone down on the marble counter, letting it slide away from you, and sniffle. "I am not even going to answer that," you say, your voice still thick and shaking. "He should worry."
Bomi looks from the glowing screen to your face "Of course he should," she says without a second thought. She reaches over, grabs your phone, and completely shuts it off, placing it face down on the counter so the screen goes entirely black. "Come on, babe, let's go sit, yeah? Let him worry where you are for a bit."
A small, weary smile finally breaks through your tears. Following your best friend into the living room, you sink into the couch and finally begin to relax a bit, the tight, suffocating fury that had consumed you all morning slowly calming down.
But meanwhile, back at your apartment, Seunghyun was an absolute mess.
He frustratingly threw his phone onto the mattress, watching it bounce uselessly as his call to you went straight to voicemail for the third consecutive time. He knew you were upset; this time, the violent slam of the front door had made it crystal clear. He scrambled around the bedroom, throwing on a pair of jeans that were scattered carelessly on the bed from the night before, and strode over to the dresser to grab a clean shirt.
But as he reached out, his dark eyes caught the calendar hanging on the wall. And there, marked with a bold, hand-drawn ink heart right over today's date, was written: our anniversary.
The breath completely left his lungs. Seunghyun let out a long, heavy sigh, running a rough hand over his face as the crushing weight of his mistake hit him all at once. "Fuckkkk," he groaned into the empty room, the deep syllables rough with sudden guilt.
He yanked the shirt over his head and headed straight out the door, determined to find you. For two whole hours, he looked everywhere you could possibly be. He drove to the park where you two used to walk, checked your favorite quiet coffee shop, and even drove out to your parents' house. But there was no sign of your car, no sign of you, and a cold, genuine worry started to twist in his stomach. Panicking, he pulled over and frantically texted the group chat, asking the members if you had contacted any of them. Nothing. No one had heard a single thing. At this point, he was so desperate he had the guys actively out looking for you, too.
Back at Bomi's, knowing he was out there frantically searching for you actually made you happy. Let him worry, you told yourself, a quiet sense of justice settling into your chest. Let him be the one who's anxious for once, while you sat safely hidden away with your best friend.
The conversation you and Bomi had on that couch was deep, heavy, and definitive. You cried, she cried with you, but through the tears, you finally came to a heartbreaking conclusion. The endless waiting, the loneliness, the forgotten milestones—you couldn't do it anymore. You needed him to let you go.
As the hours passed by, you eventually stood up and went home, leaving Bomi's apartment just in time. Because only an hour after you left, Seunghyun finally figured out where you must have gone and arrived at her building.
A quick, desperate knock rattled Bomi's front door, and Seunghyun's deep, panicked voice could be heard muffled from the other end. "Come on, Y/n, I know you're in there!''
Bomi rolled her eyes, her patience entirely gone, and yanked the door open. Seunghyun didn't even wait for an invitation; he let himself straight into her apartment, barging past her just like you had done hours earlier. He looked around the small space frantically, his dark eyes searching the living room and hallway for any sign of your shoes or your jacket. When he realized the apartment was quiet, he turned his sharp, desperate attention back to Bomi.
"Where is she??" he demanded, his voice rough.
Your friend just stands there, letting out a heavy, disappointed sigh. "You fucked up, Seunghyun."
Seunghyun scoffs, defensive adrenaline masking the absolute terror in his chest. "I—I'm making it up to her! There's a whole dinner set up for her at ho—"
"No, Seunghyun," Bomi interrupts sharply, cutting him off before he can finish the excuse. "This is not the first time. I think this was her limit," she whispers, her voice dropping as she shields the deeper parts of your conversation, not wanting to say much more to him.
Seunghyun furrows his heavy brows, the word echoing in his head like a threat. He repeats it, his voice cracking slightly with a mix of confusion and anger. "Her limi—what the fuck are you even talking about? Where is she?"
Bomi doesn't argue. She just tilts her head slowly toward the door, her eyes deadpan. "She went home. About an hour ago."
Seunghyun doesn't waste another second. He turns on his heel and heads straight out the door, rushing down the corridor to get back to the apartment as fast as his legs can carry him.
When he finally reaches the apartment, he frantically opens the door, letting it fly open with a violent crash as it hits the wall. You sat there on the couch with your legs crossed, holding a glass of wine, completely still in the center of the quiet room. The moment Seunghyun saw you, the sheer panic in his posture evaporated, replaced by a desperate, driving urgency. He rushed over across the hardwood floor, dropping heavily to his knees right in front of you. He reached out, holding you tightly by your legs and waist as if to assure himself you were actually there.
"I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry," he choked out, his voice thick and rough as he looked up at you. "I was so worried about you."
You smile down at Seunghyun, a soft, heartbreakingly sad expression crossing your face as you reach out and run a gentle hand through his messy black hair. He looks up at you, his dark eyes searching yours frantically, looking for any sign of forgiveness. Sensing the softness of your touch, he tries to swallow the lump in his throat and gives you a small, hopeful smile.
"Did—did you see the dinner I made you?" he whispered.
You did. That was the absolute first thing you had noticed the exact moment you walked through the front door an hour ago. The dining table was set beautifully, a mirror image of the effort you had put in the night before. But it didn't phase you. It only made your heart crumble even more, a painful reminder of how they only ever realized what they had when it was already slipping through their fingers. Still, your mind was completely made up.
You look away from the beautifully set table, pulling your gaze back down to meet his eyes. "I did, Oppa," you say softly, your voice trembling as you use the familiar title. "But... we have to talk."
Seunghyun blinks up at you, the fragile hope dying in his eyes as a sudden look of sheer worry takes over his features. "O-ok," he stammers, his hands tightening slightly on your clothes.
You sniffle, sitting up straighter on the edge of the cushions, and reach down to hold his large, cold hand in yours. "I love you so much," you whisper, the honesty of the words tearing at your throat. "But I can't keep doing this."
Seunghyun's breath hitches, his entire face turning completely white as the gravity of your words sinks in. "What?" he whispers, his voice dropping into a terrified, breathless register.
You stand up, the sudden physical closeness making you anxious as the emotions threaten to overwhelm you. "I—I can't," you say, stepping back as you gesture vaguely to the empty space around you. "You're not here. You're never here."
Seunghyun stays right where he is on his knees, completely frozen, watching you with wide, desperate eyes as you pace a step away. You sniffle heavily, the tears finally breaking through your resolve and spilling over your eyelashes, sprawling down your cheeks in hot, wet tracks.
"I can't live like this," you sob, your voice cracking under the weight of six years of loneliness. "You... you have to let me go," you whisper.
The words seem to break the paralysis holding him down. Seunghyun desperately shuffles forward on his knees across the carpet, throwing his large arms around your waist and buried his face against your stomach, clinging to you with every ounce of strength he has left. "Y/n, p-please don't do this," he begs, his deep voice fracturing into a ragged, pathetic sob. "Please."
You reach down, your fingers touching his trembling arms as he holds you so tightly against him. The pain in his voice is agonizing, tearing you apart from the inside out. You cry, your chest heaving with heavy, jagged breaths as you look down at his bowed head. "I—I have to."
Seunghyun hugs you even closer, hiding his face against your body as the reality of the situation completely breaks him. He’s crying now, his broad shoulders shaking violently as heavy tears wet the fabric of your clothes.
"No, no, please... I'll change," he weeps, "I'll change, please. I love you so much. I—I can't live without you."
He looks up at you then, his face completely ruined by grief, thick tears pouring down his cheeks in a steady stream. He reaches up, his large hands touching your arms, gripping them loosely. "I can't live without these arms," he says, his voice breaking on a sob. His hands move up, his thumbs gently wiping the moisture from your skin as he cups your face. "Without this face."
He sits up a bit higher on his knees, his trembling fingers moving to lightly touch your lips, his touch cool and desperate. "Without these lips," he whispers against the space between you.
Driven by absolute desperation, he leans in and kisses you. It's a gentle, agonizingly sweet kiss, filled with all the love and history of the last six years. For a single, fleeting moment, you sink into it, your body remembering the comfort of his mouth, before the reality of the endless waiting forces you to pull away.
You slide your hands up to his face, leaning forward until your forehead is resting flat against his. The room is entirely silent except for the sound of your shared, shaky breathing.
"You're going to have to," you whispered against his skin.
The memory of that night became a permanent shadow, a cruel tape that would replay in your mind no matter how many times or how deeply you tried to push it down into the dark. In the quiet moments of your new reality, your thoughts would always drift back to the devastating contrast of that final hour—the raw, uncharacteristic helplessness of a man who commanded the attention of millions, completely reduced to nothing on the hardwood floor of your shared living room.
You would close your eyes and see the suffocating sadness in his dark eyes, a look of total defeat that completely shattered the untouchable persona the rest of the world knew. You would feel the phantom weight of his large hands gripping your waist, the agonizing memory of him dropping to his knees, begging for a chance to rewrite six years of neglected promises. And worst of all, the echo of your own voice whispering those final, definitive words would ring in your ears.
You wouldn't know it yet, standing there in the wreckage of your relationship with your jacket on and your keys in hand, but the guilt of walking out would forever eat you alive. You had won your freedom from the loneliness, but the image of leaving him entirely broken on the floor was a price that would cost you a piece of your heart forever.
You stayed with Bomi for a while, using her extra space as a temporary sanctuary until you could figure out your next step and find a place of your own. Seunghyun had tried to convince you to keep the luxury high-rise apartment, offering to be the one to pack up and leave instead, but you had said no. There was no way you could afford a place like that on your own salary, so you told him to stay. You packed up only the absolute essentials on that first devastating night, and over the next couple of weeks, you only ever went back to the apartment when you knew his hectic schedule would keep him far away. You never ran into him once, a bitter blessing you could entirely attribute to the very career that had torn you apart in the first place.
When you weren't sneaking back to the apartment to grab the remaining pieces of your life, you were trapped in a dark, exhausting loop. You stuffed your face with spicy buldak chips, cried until your throat was dry, went for a grueling jog to escape your own head, logged onto your computer to work, cried again, went for another jog, drank until the numb feeling took over, cried, ate, and went for another jog. It was a relentless, punishing cycle.
It was a routine that repeated itself over and over again for weeks, blurring the days together until the loneliness felt like a physical weight. Until one day, something abruptly shattered the pattern.
This time, instead of throwing on your sneakers and heading out for your morning jog like you did every single day, you woke up with a sudden, violent wave of nausea. An intense, undeniable need to vomit hit you before your feet even touched the hardwood floor. You sprinted down the hallway to Bomi's bathroom, dropping to your knees in front of the toilet, and threw up everything. The cheap liquor from the night before, the spicy chips, the greasy fast food—everything came burning up.
The first time it happened, you didn't think much of it. You figured your body was finally just rejecting the terrible diet and the alcohol, so you stopped drinking entirely. But the next morning, the nausea returned just as fiercely. You tried completely changing your eating habits, swapping out the junk food for clean meals and tea, but even that didn't stop the constant, exhausting vomiting. It happened day after day, a miserable weight dragging you down until a terrifying, quiet thought finally crept into the back of your mind.
And that was how you ended up here, sitting flat on the closed lid of the toilet, the cold tile floor chilling your bare feet, staring down at the small plastic stick resting in your palm.
Two undeniable pink lines stared right back at you. A positive pregnancy test.
Your heart stopped, a wave of shock crashing over you so hard it made your head spin. Six years of waiting for the right moment and now, weeks after you had finally gathered the courage to walk away and end it all, you were carrying his child. You were completely alone in your best friend's apartment, staring at the evidence of a permanent bond to the man you had just promised to leave behind forever.
You didn't know whether you were happy or sad. The emotions tangled violently together in your chest, leaving you completely dizzy. You wanted children, you both did, but this was the absolute worst timing imaginable.
Over the course of your six-year relationship, you had both talked about having children countless times during those rare, quiet late-night conversations in bed. But with his grueling career. there was never a good time. There was always another comeback, another milestone, or another hurdle that pushed your shared dreams further into the future.
As the first tear rolled down your cheek, catching the dim bathroom light, you blinked and looked closer at the test. Then another tear fell, and another, until the tight knot of anxiety in your throat began to loosen. You realized they were happy tears. The overwhelming sadness and terror you expected to feel slowly dissolved, replaced by a profound, radiant warmth that bloomed deep in your chest.
This was something you had always wanted. Despite the lonely nights, and the devastating breakup in your apartment, your love for him had never truly died—it had just run out of room to survive the chaos of his career. Honestly, you saw it as a last blessing.
You wiped your face with a trembling hand, a small, genuine smile finally breaking through the tears for the first time in weeks. It didn't matter that you were currently living out of suitcases at your best friend's place, and it didn't matter that the future was completely uncertain. The crushing weight of the loneliness you had carried since walking out felt a little lighter now. No matter what happened next, no matter how far his career took him or how deep the silence grew between you, you had a piece of him with you forever.
It was a tough journey, of course pregnancy was, bringing with it a flood of physical changes, morning sickness, and quiet anxieties, but your parents and your best friend were more than happy and fiercely supportive every single step of the way. They shielded you when you felt vulnerable and kept your spirits high when the weight of the situation felt too heavy to carry alone. As the months drew closer to your due date, you finally took the definitive step of finding your own permanent place—a beautiful, sunlit three-bedroom apartment in a quiet, safe neighborhood in Seoul. Long before the due date even arrived, you had meticulously baby-proofed every single corner of the space, softening sharp edges, securing cabinets, and creating a flawless sanctuary. You always knew deep down in your soul that you were going to be an fiercely protective mom, and you were ready to do absolutely anything required to keep your baby girl safe from the harsh world outside.
The moment Seo-ah was born, the universe shifted, and she never left your side. You walked around the apartment with her cradled against your chest, carried her everywhere you went, and built your entire daily routine around her heartbeat. She was the most beautiful, cute little thing, and the absolute first thing you noticed when you looked down into her tiny face was the undeniable shape and depth of her gaze; she had his exact eyes. It was a detail that brought a bittersweet ache to your chest, and you found yourself telling her that a lot as you rocked her to sleep.
''You know you have your Appa's eyes," you would whisper softly against her forehead.
Every time you said it, Seo-ah would let out a bright, bubbling laugh and clap her tiny hands together, completely oblivious to the weight of the name but completely captivated by the love in your voice. You felt a deep, lingering pang of guilt that she was never going to meet her father, knowing how much he would have cherished her if things had been different, but you promised yourself that one day, when she was finally old enough to understand the complexity of adult life, you would sit her down and tell her the truth. There was simply no way she wasn't going to find out about Bigbang as she got older; their legacy was permanently etched into the culture, and you knew the massive conversation was inevitably going to come up sooner or later.
But for now, all she needed to worry about was if she was going to have her absolute favorite breakfast: chocolate chip pancakes. As she grew older, some things naturally changed about her personality and her habits, but that specific craving never did. Chocolate chip pancakes stayed her forever favorite, a tradition that was permanently woven into the fabric of her childhood. Every single Saturday morning, without fail, you and Seo-ah would walk hand in hand down the street to your mother's local shop, where the sweet aroma of the batter hitting the griddle was already waiting for her.
On this particular morning, the two of you walked the familiar, tree-lined route to the shop just like you had done a hundred times before. Seo-ah skipped energetically beside you, her small hand gripping yours tightly as she focused intensely on trying to avoid the cracks in the sidewalk, letting out a bright giggle every time she successfully cleared one. Your daughter was five years old now, and you honestly couldn't believe how incredibly fast the time had flown by. It was a heartbreaking realization, but beautiful all at the same time; she was growing into an incredibly smart, observant, and kind girl, and you were genuinely excited for the path she was going to pave for herself.
''Eomma, Eomma! Look, a butterfly!" your daughter squealed suddenly, her eyes widening with pure childhood wonder as she broke away from your grip.
She ran off toward a nearby cherry blossom tree where a pale butterfly had just fluttered, her little shoes clicking against the pavement. "Don't run too far, Seo-ah!" you yelled after her, your voice raised just enough to carry down the quiet sidewalk as you walked slowly behind her, a warm, protective smile completely lighting up your face.
Your voice echoed clearly down the block, cutting through the calm morning air. And there, sitting alone at a small outdoor table at a nearby sidewalk café, a man heard your voice.
His head perked up instantly, his posture frozen. The man almost didn't dare to trust his own mind, convinced he was dreaming, because it was the exact voice he had missed, craved, and replayed in his head for the last phew long, agonizing years.
Seunghyun stands up looking around, everywhere—behind him, ahead, to the side—trying to find you. He knew it was you, he just knew it, he felt it in his chest. Finally, he looked over by the blossom trees, and there, standing by the pink trees smiling down, was you. The love of his life, the woman he never let go of, the heartbreak he never recovered from. He blinked, rubbing his eyes just to make sure he wasn't seeing things, and he wasn't. There you were, still as beautiful as when he first met you.
A giant smile breaks across his face as he takes a step forward, wanting so badly to talk to you, when a little girl came into sight beside you. Seunghyun furrowed his brows, confused. The little girl looked just like you. You crouched down right beside her as she looked at a butterfly resting on the tree. As Seunghyun got closer, he got a better look at the child's face, and he saw it. His eyes. She had his eyes. Seunghyun blinked again, he couldn't believe it. He was confused—why you didn't tell him, why you didn't reach out to him—but honestly, he didn't care. He had a child, finally, and she was as beautiful as you. He took another step closer, his heart beating incredibly fast.
"See, Seo-ah, the butterfly is keeping soooo still," you whispered to her.
Your daughter giggled, gently pointing at the butterfly. "What kind of butterfly is it, Eomma??"
Before you got a chance to respond, a deep man's voice spoke from right behind you both. "It's an Amanda's Blue. They're gorgeous, aren't they?"
You froze beside your daughter, who had already turned around and looked up at him. You knew that voice—a voice you hadn't heard in years. You turn and look up, and standing there was Seunghyun, your heart doing that exact, familiar flip in your chest.
"Hello!! I am Seo-ah!" your daughter yelled, being her natural, friendly self.
Seunghyun crouched down beside her, a soft smile completely lighting up his face. "Hello, Seo-ah. I am Seunghyun."
Your daughter giggled and pointed back to the butterfly. "Isn't she pretty???" she asked.
Seunghyun turned his head and looked up at you, his smile widening. "Stunning," he murmured, his eyes locking onto yours.
You cleared your throat and stood up, brushing the dirt off your knees. Seunghyun stood up with you as your daughter stayed by the tree, completely captivated by the butterfly. You force a gentle smile and say, "Seunghyun... wow. I—I—how are you?"
Seunghyun smiles back at you, reaching up to rub the back of his neck. "I'm good." He lied. He was awful, dealing with the breakup so much worse than you ever did. He had even left Bigbang just a year ago, performing their last song together before walking away from the spotlight. "How are you?" he asked back.
You couldn't lie to him. You were happy, really happy with the life you built, but you also felt as if a piece of you was always missing without him in your life. But still, you softly smiled and said, "Good."
Seunghyun nodded slowly, his eyes lingering on your face. "Good, good."
He looks down at his daughter, who was now sitting comfortably in the grass with her legs crossed, still watching the butterfly and taking pictures of it with her little toy camera. Then he looks back up at you, his voice dropping into a breathless register. "She has my eyes," Seunghyun whispered. "So, when... I mean—"
You interrupted him gently, having no issue telling him the absolute truth now. "A little after I left, I found out. It was... shocking, but..." You looked down at your daughter with a fond, warm smile and said, "But I couldn't be more happy."
Seunghyun swallowed hard, processing the timeline. "So that makes her... what, five now?"
You turn your head back to him and nod.
Seunghyun chuckles softly, a sound filled with awe and a little bit of heartbreak. "Wow. Time does go by fast."
You nod in agreement, and the both of you just watch your daughter for a long, silent moment. Only the gentle breeze from the beautiful spring day could be heard rustling the pink cherry blossom petals around you.
Seo-ah suddenly stood up, brushing the grass off her dress as she walked back over to your side. "I'm hungry, Eomma. Can we go?"
You take her little hand in yours, your thumb stroking her knuckles. "Of course, sweety."
You turn back to Seunghyun to say your goodbyes, but before you can say anything, your daughter reaches out and grabs Seunghyun's large hand in hers. "Can the man join us too???" she smiles brightly, tugging on his fingers.
You smile at the sight. The man you still love, holding your daughter's hand under the morning sun. Without a single hesitation, you say softly, "Of course."
Seunghyun looked genuinely surprised, his eyebrows raising for just a moment before a massive, radiant smile broke across his face. Seo-ah jumps up and down excitedly and says, "Yay!!" as she begins to proudly tug her father down the sidewalk towards the shop. You follow right behind them, laughing softly at the sight.
★ SUMMARY: It’s been months since you and subong broke things off. You moved on, built a quiet life and found someone else. But that doesn't stop the late night drunk calls. You know you shouldn't answer, but you cave every single time.
★ WARNINGS: angst, toxic ex, idk what else to put here
★ AUTHORS NOTE: I didn't proofread this one so ignore any errors. Loosely inspired by heartbeat by childish gambino
The screen of your phone lit up the dark bedroom, the steady vibration rattling loudly against the nightstand.
You didn't even need to look at the caller ID. You already knew who was calling you at this hour.
When you slid your thumb across the glass and brought the phone to your ear, the silence on the other end was heavy, thick with the muted roar of rain and the low, slurred breathing of someone who had downed one too many drinks.
"You answered" Subongs voice rang through the speaker, smooth and infuriatingly slow.
"Subong.." you sighed, pulling the duvet up over your shoulders, trying to harden your tone to seem unbothered. "It’s two in the morning. We stopped doing this months ago."
"Yeah? You sound real confident for a girl who picked up on the second ring." he murmured, letting out a low, bitter chuckle that vibrated right against your eardrum.
Your fingers tightened around the phone, your teeth digging into the inside of your cheek. You knew you should hang up. You knew you shouldn't feed into any of this, but your hand refused to move. You just sat there in the dark, listening to the heavy static of his breath.
"Yeah, I know" he muttered, another breathy, bitter laugh escaping him. "I know you've got that new guy now. The polite one. The one who makes you breakfast and works that fancy corporate job. Very clean. Very domestic."
"Don't do this" you said softly.
"Do what? State the obvious?" A heavy pause filled the line, followed by the faint click of a lighter and a long exhale. "You think you built this neat little life without me?" he scoffed, his voice sharp and cynical. "But every time your phone lights up late at night, you still check if it's my name."
He paused, his voice dropping into that low, dangerous register that used to strip away every defense you had.
"I know you close your eyes and pretend it's me who's touching you" he purred, quiet arrogance dripping off every word. "He doesn't even know I could walk into your room right now, slide my hand up your thigh, and have you dripping before I even took my jacket off."
He chuckled softly, knowing you were on the other side of the line, squirming in the dark at his words. He was right. He knew your body better than anyone; he knew exactly where to touch, where to bite, and how to make your knees go weak without even trying.
"You know I'm right, Y/N." he slurred. "You know nobody else touches you like that. Nobody makes you feel as good as I did."
All that could come out of your mouth was a shaky, ragged exhale. Your mind flooded with sudden, blinding flashbacks, the weight of his hands tracing your hips, his mouth pressed against yours, the desperate pleas of you begging him for more.
"You're drunk, Subong. Go home." you whispered, squeezing your eyes shut in the dark as if you could physically force out the memories of his hands, his mouth, and every night you'd spent tangled up together.
"I am home. My apartment's empty, just like you wanted when you walked out." he spat. "You cried, you called me a fuckin' loser, and then you left."
His breath came in ragged hitches through the speaker, his tone shifting into a sneer.
"And the worst part? I didn't even care." he laughed, the bitter edge in his tone cutting right through you. "I didn't give a shit, because I knew the second we got in bed all of that noise was just going to be washed away. It was the only time we were ever honest with each other."
"You were a ghost, Subong" you choked out. "You never gave me anything real. That's why I walked away."
Walking away from whatever the hell you two had going on had been the hardest thing you'd ever done. You knew it was the only way to protect yourself. You were falling for a guy who refused to commit, who would disappear for days without a word, who pushed you away whenever you got too close.
"So now I'm supposed to just watch you move on?" Subong scoffed, his voice dropping into that rapid, frantic pace whenever his mind got too tangled to control. "You think I haven't tried? I bring girls back here. I fuck them and I let them think they mean something, but I look at them and feel completely empty."
He paused, letting out a rough sigh that crackled through the receiver. "None of them make me feel the way you do."
The admission hung in the dark, feeling heavy and suffocating.
"I wanted you to know…" he said softly, the smugness completely evaporating, leaving behind a raw, desperate tone that made your chest ache. "I wanted you to know that I’m losing my mind without you. I sit around, I act like I don't give a fuck, but whenever I think about you, I go insane."
"Subong..." you whispered, a quiet, shuddering breath escaping your lips.
"I fucked up, alright?" The armor he always wore finally cracked, revealing a desperate, bruised ego. "I know I was a nightmare. I know I was crazy and closed off and impossible to deal with. But don't sit there and act like you didn't love the chaos when it was just the two of us."
You pressed the palm of your hand against your forehead, squeezing your eyes shut as a tear slipped down your cheek.
"He actually treats me like I'm part of his life, Subong" you whispered, your voice breaking. "You only wanted me when you realized you were losing me."
"He's a fake" Subong snapped back, pure bitterness leaking into his voice. "He's safe and he's boring. He doesn't know a single real thing about you."
A sharp, violent thud echoed through the speaker.
"Fuck this, Y/N. Seriously" he breathed. His chest heaved, a dull ache throbbing in his palm from slamming his hand against the table. "What were we even doing for two years? Were we dating? Were we just using each other? Were we even friends? I don't even know anymore." he yelled, his voice cracking with pure frustration.
"I wish I'd never touched you. I wish I’d treated you like the waste of time you actually were. I fucking hate you." he sneered, his voice dripping with venom. It was cruel and he knew it, he was drowning in his own pain and wanted to drag you down with him.
The line fell into a suffocating, fragile silence. You held your breath, waiting for him to hang up, waiting for the harsh reality of the dial tone to snap you back to your quiet room.
Instead, a shuddering exhale filtered through the speaker. When his voice came through one last time, it was barely louder than a whisper, cracking into raw, pathetic desperation.
"...you're the best thing that's ever happened to me," he whispered, his voice trembling, thick with regret. "I can't do this without you. Please, Y/N..."
Before you could breathe a word, the line went dead with a soft click on the other end.
Alone in the pitch black, your head spun as the crushing weight of his words finally broke you. You collapsed back onto your pillow, feeling completely helpless as tears rolled down your cheeks.
(this is the first time I post here so don't mind me if I mess something up💔)
“Su-Bong?.."
I asked quietly, walking to the living room. The sudden brightness of the ceiling light made me squint my eyes, not knowing what was waiting for me.
He came home from somewhere, high as a kite, trembling like he's made of jelly.
"Señorita!~”
He giggled like crazy.
"Wanna hear the new track I just made? It's about you.”
He stumbled towards me which made me immediately extended my arms towards him, stepping closer.
"Maybe later?... You know I don't like when you use drugs. I know it's hard, but please-”
“Fucking slut! Not even grateful that I made something for you? Huh? Is that what you are trying to say to me?!"
His eyes darted to my own ones. I suddenly didn't know what to say. I'm used to this, sure, but I just never know how to bite back enough to make him shut up.
“But baby-"
"Shut up, bitch!”
He kept cutting me off, not even caring about my opinion.
It's not that he actually doesn't care about my opinion. It's just that it hurts him that I'm right and he can't keep a single promise. He promised me to at least do it less.
He stumbled towards me until he was close enough he then pushed me against the wall. I don't know what he took but this is not the usual.
“You know it reminds me of my mother."
I quickly said, afraid of him. He never hit me but there's this scary part about him that always makes me flinch.
“And I'm not your fucking mother. Maybe you should be grateful and stop comparing me to your old hag, fix your goddamn issues first and then maybe you could start yapping."
This just made me nod. He let go and kept walking funny to the bedroom, just crashing on the bed.
I didn't want to sleep with him like this. This hurt more than usual and the fact that he took something else for sure made my stomach twist. I sat down on the edge of the couch, hugging my knees.
“Fucking idiot! Can't you just understand? You are not my daughter. I only gave life to you, but that doesn't mean that I'm your goddamn mother you stupid slut."
My mother screamed and grabbed me by the collar of my shirt. The shirt I got from my grandma for my birthday. It got Twilight from my little pony on it.
“I'm…I'm sorry, mom. I-”
Slap.
"Are you even listening to me? Are you trying to make me even more mad at you? You made my life hell, and now you are trying to make it worse?”
She then tore my shirt apart. This made me let out a scream which I don't usually do because it results in getting beaten up.
“NO!!..I GOT THAT FROM GRANDMA!!"
I fell on my bed as my ruined shirt was now in her hands. It wasn't the best fabric so she could rip it easily. But that shirt used to make me so happy, so hopeful. I looked up to Twilight. I always loved her purple colour and how smart she was.
“You didn't deserve it, stupid cunt! If you don't stop crying right now, I will give you a fucking reason to cry for!”
That made me try my absolute hardest to stop crying but my sobbing wouldn't stop. I knew mom had taken something. She's always like this whenever she takes those stuff.
"Can't even listen to me now, huh?”
"You said I'm not your daughter-”
She suddenly let go of the other half of the shirt, twisted the other one and hit me as hard as she could. I screamed, cried, begged.
“I TAKE CARE OF YOU! I FUCKING FEED YOU!! THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?!"
Another hit.
Then another.
Another.
My vision went blurry.
--
"Why won't you come in?”
I jumped a little as if I was still living in that memory. Su-Bong's voice made me snap out of it.
“Sorry, I don't want to sleep with you tonight.”
"Fuck, (name). I'm sorry. Please forgive me…"
He dropped to his knees, hugging my ankles as he looked up to me.
"When are you going to stop?”
"I don't know, but I'm trying.”
Maybe the only thing making me stay in this relationship is the fact that at least he doesn't hit me.
He does drugs like my mom, but he's not that bad, right? He would never hit me.
That's definitely love.
"Okay…”
I just mumbled. He got up and put his shoes on like nothing happened.
He's doing it again. He's going to become the victim, leave for like an hour and then come back like nothing happened with my favorite sweets.
"Where are you going?”
He looked me in the eyes before starting his usual ‘this is your fault!’ childish roleplay.
“I'm going to fucking hang myself. I hope you are happy. Remember this face because this is the last time you will see me."
Then he walked out, slamming the door shut behind him.
He's always back. Always. For some reason, though, I'm always scared that he might do something stupid whenever he's on drugs. I always have to watch out for something. I can never be at ease.
I remember how we met. We met on December 24th. It was dark outside, around 9PM. I had no one to spend Christmas with, so I just went to the park where I could watch the beautiful lighting of the houses and stores.
Then he sat next to me.
"Yo, señorita! What is a pretty girl like you doing out here on this day?”
I turned my face towards him. Despite it being dark, I could see his features pretty well. I found him attractive. His dyed purple hair stood out to me the most. It made me smile.
“Señorita, hm? Well…I got no one to spend my Christmas with."
I simply said, not dragging it further. His playful bravado dropped almost immediately.
“Same."
He looked away, then continued.
"Can I get to know you?”
This made me nod immediately. I was pretty surprised, though. I guess we're both suffering together....
"Sure. Want to exchange numbers?”
He took his phone out of his pocket, switching it with mine.
While we were typing our numbers on the phones, he spoke up.
“I’m a rapper, you know? My stage name is Thanos. Oh, and I'm called Su-Bong, by the way.”
We gave each other our phones back.
"(Name). Also…Thanos? Like that marvel character?"
This made me laugh. Is this man serious?!
“Hell yeah, baby! You should definitely subscribe. I will make you VIP."
He winked shamelessly, leaning closer.
That night I ended up in his bed.
Talking about our problems made us so frustrated that we ended up making out. I didn't know why I trusted him so easily, but he trusted me too so it's okay, right? He didn't lie at least.
But then things got worse pretty quick.
I used to work as someone who cleaned cinemas.
He showed up every single day, so jealous of others looking at me that he ended up arguing with my coworkers which led me to get fired because even if he was banned from the cinema, he kept bringing his bodyguards just so he could get in forcefully because of his jealousy. My boss had to let go of me.
Back when we met he was already an addict but not as bad as now. I didn't have to worry about him coming home late. I didn't have to worry about him calling me names and not knowing what to say.
I didn't have to worry at all.
He provides for everything, but at the same time he made sure I can never leave. Not that I want to leave him…I love him too much. Even if he would shoot me, I would still love him.
I would rather be his victim than his opponent.
I didn’t notice I had drifted into my thoughts again until he was standing in front of me, holding a huge bag of my favorites.
He looks way better than he was an hour before. He's somewhat normal but it's clear shit’s still in his system.
“Señorita…I got these for you. Do you want to watch a movie? I can even massage your feet.”
I knew that tonight would end the same as always. It always does whenever he pulls this move.
★ SUMMARY: "You're tense" he whispers, tracing a slow, intoxicating circle against your skin.
Land the job. Work hard. Keep it professional.
It was a solid plan until a stalled elevator put you and all your self-control at the mercy of Choi Seunghyun.
★ WARNINGS: None.
★ WC: 1.7k +
★ AUTHORS NOTE: I'm so down bad for this man, I started writing again lmao. This is the first fic I have written in years, so I am a both nervous and excited. And if there are grammar errors, just close your eyes and act like you don't see it. Hope y'all enjoy!
For the past three months, your life has been dictated by a single, terrifying presence: Choi Seunghyun.
When you first landed the entry-level job at his creative agency, you promised yourself you’d remain completely professional. You were here to build a career, not to get distracted. But that became impossible the first time you saw him in person. He wasn't just a boss, he was someone who commanded every room he walked into, moving with a quiet, confidence that made it hard to breathe.
To him, you were just another face in the crowd. A low-level worker who arrived early, stayed late, and worked herself to the bone to ensure every file, presentation, and coffee order was flawless.
It was early in the morning, and the office had been completely empty. Clutching a stack of notes tightly to your chest, you stepped into the elevator, exhausted and ready to start the workday. Just before the doors slid shut, a tall, imposing figure stepped in alongside you, bringing with him the faint, distinct scent of expensive cologne. Your heart had immediately leaped into your throat. It was him.
The display above the door blinks from 3 to 4, and then, clunk, the elevator grinds to a dead halt. The lights flicker once before dying completely, plunging the car into pitch blackness.
A second later, the dim, amber emergency lights kick on, a warm, shadowy glow fills the small space.
Your heart sinks into your stomach. You glance at the control panel. Nothing but dead buttons and then you slowly turn your head to look at the man standing next to you.
Choi Seunghyun.
He isn't just a global icon; he’s the CEO of the agency where you've spent the last three months working yourself to the bone. You usually only see him from across a boardroom table or passing by in the hallway, surrounded by a small army of assistants.
But right now? It’s just the two of you.
Seunghyun doesn’t panic. Of course he doesn't. He lowers his phone, his sharp jawline catching the dim amber light. Slowly, he turns his head to look down at you, a faint, unreadable smirk playing on his lips.
"Well," his voice vibrates through the small space, a rich, deep baritone that sends a shiver straight down your spine. "That was dramatic. Are you alright?"
"I.. yes, Mr. Choi. Just a bit startled," you squeak out, clutching your clipboard to your chest like a shield.
"No need for 'Mr. Choi'" he says softly. He reaches over and hits the emergency call button. After a brief conversation with a crackly, distant voice from security, he hangs up and sighs. "They said it’ll be at least forty minutes. Power grid failure."
He shifts, the heavy fabric of his coat rustling and slides down the wall until he’s sitting flat on the floor with his long legs stretched out. He looks up at you, tilting his head.
"You're going to get tired standing in those heels," he gestures to the floor next to him. "Sit."
It's a command, but delivered with an intimate softness that makes your knees weak. You nod, sliding down the wall and smoothing your skirt as you sit beside him. You try to keep a respectable distance, but the elevator is small and your shoulders inevitably brush.
"You look terrified," Seunghyun notes, turning his head to face you. In the dim amber light, his dark eyes are incredibly intense. "Is it claustrophobia, or are you just afraid of your boss?"
"A little bit of both," you admit, your voice barely a whisper.
He lets out a low, rumbling chuckle "I don't bite."
You smile, the tension in your shoulders easing just a bit. For the next twenty minutes, the corporate barrier begins to melt. He asks you about your ideas for the new marketing campaign, listening to your nervous answers with genuine interest. He praises your work ethic, telling you he's noticed how hard you've been working and how you arrive early and stay late.
But then, the atmosphere shifts. The air in the elevator feels thicker, warmer.
Seunghyun shifts closer to you, shifting his weight onto his elbow so he's leaning toward you. His gaze drops from your eyes to your lips, then down to your legs. Because of how you're sitting, your skirt has ridden up slightly above your knee.
"You work too hard" he murmurs, his voice dropping an octave, becoming dangerously smooth.
Before you can process his words, you feel the heat of his hand. He places his fingertips just above your knee. Your breath catches in your throat.
Slowly, his long fingers begin to trace a path upward, tracing a slow line up your thigh, then back down to your knee. The touch is light, agonizingly slow, and completely tests the limits of your professionalism. It's a blatant line crossed. Your heart is pounding so loud, you're sure he can hear it. You can't bring yourself to move.
"S-Seunghyun..." you breathe out, your voice trembling.
"You're tense," he whispers, his hand pausing, his thumb rubbing a slow, intoxicating circle against your skin.
He leans in closer. The scent of his expensive cologne wraps around you, dizzying your senses. He uses his other hand to gently cup your chin, tilting your face up.
He leans in so close that your breath hitches. His eyes are fixed on your lips and you instinctively close your eyes, tilting your head up, completely helpless underneath his touch. His lips are millimeters from yours. You can feel the warmth of his breath.
JOLT.
The elevator gives a violent shudder, and the harsh, bright fluorescent overhead lights snap back on. The mechanical whir of the motor starts up instantly and the car smoothly begins to glide upward.
Seunghyun pulls back smoothly, his hand leaving your leg so fast it leaves a cold ache where his touch had just been. By the time the elevator doors slide open to the bright, main lobby, he is already standing, perfectly composed.
A couple of security guards and his main assistant are standing there, looking panicked. "Mr. Choi! Are you alright?"
"Perfectly fine," Seunghyun says, his voice reverting instantly back to his cool, authoritative CEO tone. He steps out of the elevator, looking back at you as you scramble to your feet, trying to smooth down your skirt with shaking hands.
He catches your eye. There’s a dangerous, playful glint in his gaze that lets you know exactly what just happened wasn't a dream.
"Y/N," he says. "Bring the Q3 reports to my office tomorrow morning. First thing. We have a lot left to discuss."
He turns and walks away, leaving you standing in the elevator lobby with your heart in your throat, completely breathless.
The rest of the workday passes in a total blur. You walk through the lobby, your legs feeling like jelly and somehow manage to navigate your way back to your desk.
For the next couple of hours, you are utterly useless.
Every time you try to focus on the spreadsheets on your monitor, the glowing grid lines fade away, replaced by the memory of the dim amber light of the elevator. Your skin still feels hot right where his fingertips had traced up your thigh. You find yourself staring down at your own knee, your breath catching in your throat as your mind replays the heavy, rumbling vibration of his voice whispering your name.
“You’re tense.”
"Get it together, Y/N," you mutter under your breath, aggressively clicking a random cell on your spreadsheet. You take a sharp, deep breath, shaking your head vigorously to clear the fog. He is your boss. It was just a weird, high-stress situation, you tell yourself. He was probably just testing you, or maybe he was bored. You have to remain professional if you want to keep this job.
By the time the evening finally rolls around, you pack your bag with trembling hands, stuffing your laptop in without a care and practically running out of the office to avoid any chance of bumping into him in the lobby again.
The moment you unlock the door to your apartment, the suffocating tension of the corporate world finally lifts.
Soft meows greet you as your cat trots over, rubbing their face against your ankles. You let out a long, exhausted sigh, dropping your bag on the floor and immediately scooping up your orange tabby, burying your face in its soft fur.
"You have no idea what kind of day I've had," you murmur, walking over to fill the food bowl.
You trade your office skirt and heels for worn-out sweatpants and a baggy t-shirt. You make a simple dinner, but you barely taste it with your thoughts racing. Even the familiar comfort of your apartment can’t completely erase the feeling of his large, warm hand cupping your chin, tilting your face up to his.
By midnight, you are curled up under your duvet, the moonlight filtering through the blinds. Your cat is curled into a tight ball at the foot of the bed, purring softly.
It’s the quietest part of the night, the time when your brain is supposed to shut down but instead, your imagination takes the wheel.
You roll onto your side, staring at the empty space on the pillow next to you.
You close your eyes and let yourself remember it all, without fighting it this time. You remember the exact scent of his cologne. You remember how he felt leaning over you in that tiny space.
Your mind loops those final seconds before the elevator jolted back to life. You imagine what would have happened if the power had stayed off for just five seconds longer. Would his lips have been as soft as they looked? Would his hand have slid further up your thigh? The mere thought of it sends a shiver through your entire body.
“We have a lot left to discuss.”
His words echo in your mind, a promise and a threat all at once. Tomorrow morning, you have to walk into his office, look him dead in the eye and hand him the Q3 reports as if nothing happened in the elevator.
hey yall! since i’m chronically online when it comes to reading fics on tumblr, i decided to compile a list of my fave bigbang fics of all time by some of the most talented writers on here! :)
♡ i feel like t.o.p would prefer dating someone who's equally busy. He loves his alone time, and having a partner with their own schedule means neither of them would feel guilty about being unavailable sometimes.
♡ when t.o.p realized he had feelings for you and found you were in law school, he was genuinely happy about it. He's well aware of how demanding law school is and that most of your time is spent buried in textbooks, case briefs, and studying. Oddly enough, that's one of the things he likes most, having someone who understands what it's like to be busy and chase something they're passionate about.
♡ because t.o.p values his privacy, he was slightly anxious to ask if you'd be willing to keep the relationship private. when you immediately said yes, he couldn't hide how relieved he was. hearing you say that you wanted your legal career to stand on its own, that you wanted people to recognize your accomplishments because of your talent, not because you were dating him, only made him admire you even more.
♡ even though you're in a long-distance relationship, he keeps track of your academic schedule so he knows when to send encouraging texts before exams or major deadlines. During midterm/finals szn he'll surprise you with a care package filled with all your favorite snacks, little gifts, and one of his hoodies/shirts lightly sprayed with his cologne.
♡ during the holidays, he'll either fly you out to korea or come to nyc himself, depending on his schedule. every now and then, he'll purposely schedule a photoshoot or brand event in nyc so if fans/media happen to see him around the city, no one thinks twice about why he's there.
♡ t.o.p still isn't the best with words and expressing his feelings, but he makes an effort because he knows how important it is. instead, he finds his own ways to show you how much he cares, writing you letters/songs, making you playlists, or simply staying on the phone with you in silence because sometimes your presence is all he needs.
♡ because you're pursuing contract law, t.o.p has definitely thought about bringing you into the legal side of his label. he knows you'd be incredible at it and he likes the idea of having you closer to him. but he also understands that you want your career to stand on its own and doesn't want your accomplishments to ever be questioned because of your relationship with him. so he never brings it up, even though the idea crosses his mind more often than he'd admit.
♡ he'll never admit it, but when you asked him not to attend your graduation, it genuinely hurt him. he understood your reasons. if he showed up, the media would be everywhere and fans would immediately start questioning why he was attending a nyc law graduation. so instead, he watches the ceremony from your apartment and celebrates you in private.
♡ since you chose to have a private oath ceremony, t.o.p was genuinely happy that he could attend and celebrate with you. he arrives with a huge bouquet of peonies, a gift he's carefully chosen, and probably takes way too many pictures of you because he wants to capture every second. seeing you officially become a lawyer is something he couldn't be more proud of.
[author is currently studying for lsat to attend law school next fall so ofc my delulu mind is filled with top x law student! gf haha]
wait could u lowkey write something on the piss kink for thanos that u talked about in the nsfw alphabet 👀
denying the signal
thanos nsfw alphabet
α/n: this is my first time writing something like this and idk… i like it but i got embarrassed mid writing😭 it’s canon tho guyssss believe me (he told me) also tysm for requesting this i needed to try something different. hope you like it😛 lmk if you want another one in theme!!!
content: 18+, sexual language, sexual description, piss kink, dry humping, cuming in pants, sloppy makeouts, TW: mg coin, desperation, embarrassment, new relationship, denial
words: 3k
the day thanos realized something was deeply fucked up with him was when he got into that fight with mg coin in the club pentagon bathroom mid piss. he couldn't even explain the gross, twisting feeling in his stomach, but seeing myunggi standing there like that, exposed and completely vulnerable at the urinal, made his head spin with pure hate. worse than that, he was actually a little turned on by the sight. he would never admit that shit out loud to a single soul, not even to himself. he spent the whole night trying to figure out if it was just myunggi that was messing with his head, or if it was the act itself. but he quickly told himself it couldn't be about myunggi, because he had beat the absolute hell out of the guy before he even had the chance to finish peeing.
the second time it hit him was after you two started dating. by then, he had already seen every single inch of your body, so nothing was supposed to shock him anymore. he was standing in front of the bathroom mirror, completely focused on styling his messy purple hair into his usual devil horns, when you casually walked in. without saying a word, you pulled down your pants, sat right on the toilet, and started peeing.
thanos froze, completely flabbergasted. to him, that was supposed to be something super private that nobody ever saw. or maybe he was just trying to rationalize why the sharp sound of your warm stream hitting the water sent a sudden rush of blood straight down to his pants. time literally felt like it was moving in slow motion. he stood there with a blob of hair gel drying on his fingers, totally mesmerized, his heavy eyes completely locked on you as he watched your body relax on the seat. his shaft gave a hard, noticeable twitch against his boxers, growing thicker by the second just from the sound and the view.
"what?" you asked, feeling his intense, confused eyes burning into the side of your face.
"what are you doing?" he asked, his voice low and raspy.
"... peeing?" you replied, looking at him like he was crazy.
"couldn't you have waited until i was done in here?" he asked, trying to sound annoyed to hide how hard his heart was pounding.
"i really needed to go," you said with a small shrug. "and besides, why is that even bothering you? acting like you've never seen me naked before." you let out a little chuckle.
"it's not that..." he mumbled, his jaw clenching as he stared down at you. "this is different."
the stream slowed down until the very last drop of piss hit the bottom of the toilet bowl. you grabbed some paper, wiped yourself clean, and pulled your underwear and pants back up. the whole time, you could feel his piercing, heavy gaze tracking your every move.
"okay, now you're making it weird," you said, standing up.
"sorry," he muttered with a quiet, breathy laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. "can't really help it."
you stepped over and pushed him out of the way with your shoulder so you could wash your hands at the sink.
"so, what now? are we just supposed to pee in front of each other like it's normal?" he asked, genuinely confused, his mind still reeling from how fast his body had reacted to you.
"well, yeah?" you replied, turning the water off and wiping your hands on a towel. "don't tell me you didn't do that in your previous relationships."
he frowned his eyebrows in total confusion, his forehead crinkling up. "no? why the fuck would i?"
his serious tone made you burst out laughing. "so you're telling me no girl has ever seen you pee before?"
he shrugged, staring down at his designer socks. "i mean, besides at a public urinal next to random guys... no. no girl has ever seen me do it. And neither have i seen them do it"
you looked at his flushed face and decided to use your best puppy eyes to manipulate him. "so... can i be the first one? can i hold it for you while you do it?"
the request shocked him so hard his eyes went wide. he had never in his life thought about something like that, but the sudden mental image of you looking up at him while he was completely exposed and helpless in your hand made his stomach flip with dark heat. the sheer vulnerability of it was turning him on way too fast.
he let out a heavy, defeated sigh. "fine..."
you let out a quiet cheer, grabbing his arm and pulling him over to the toilet. you positioned him right in front of the bowl, stepping up close behind him. your fingers reached around his waist to untie the strings of his baggy sweatpants. you didn't pull his pants or boxers all the way down, just enough to tug his length out into the cool air.
to your absolute surprise, he was already semi-hard in your palm, his thick skin warm and heavy. it made you laugh softly under your breath. why the hell was he already getting hard out of nowhere?
"why are you kinda hard?" you asked, looking up at him.
he let out a low chuckle, his throat working as he swallowed hard. "i just watched my girl half naked on the toilet, don't you think that's gonna do something to me?"
"i'll take that as a compliment," you replied, your fingers wrapping firmly around his shaft.
"you should," he muttered, his head tilting back as a long, shaky sigh escaped his lips.
having you grip him right there made him feel completely bare. peeing with a half-erection was already annoying and difficult on its own, but having another person physically holding his dick over the bowl turned it into a completely different experience. it wasn't like cumming at all—cumming was an intense, frantic rush where he wanted to push hard and lose control, but this required him to completely relax his body, drop his tough guard, and let himself be totally soft and vulnerable under your touch while you controlled his body.
he stood there for a few seconds, his chest heaving, but nothing was coming out.
"why aren't you peeing?" you asked softly, gently squeezing him.
"it's hard when i'm kind of hard," he rasped, his cheeks turning a deep red. "plus, you holding it right now is not fucking helping. my brain just wants to leak pre-cum because your hand feels too good."
you stroked him just a tiny bit, making his breath hitch. "try."
he closed his eyes, taking a slow, deep breath to calm his racing pulse and relax his tense muscles. slowly, the valve released. a heavy, warm stream finally broke through, splashing directly into the water below. the sound was loud in the quiet bathroom. you watched closely as his pink, rose-tipped head glistened, the skin stretched tight, pulsing slightly as the warm liquid flowed out of him. he couldn't even look down; he kept his eyes locked on the ceiling, his breathing shallow and ragged, his knuckles white as he gripped the edge of the sink to keep his balance while you held his dick steady for him.
when the stream finally tapered off into a few slow, heavy drips, you gently shook the tip for him, making sure he was clean, before tucking his length back into his underwear. but as soon as your fingers grazed the sensitive skin to pull his pants back up, he twitched violently. he had grown so much bigger and thicker just from your touch that his pants were struggling to cover the full, angry outline of his stone-hard erection.
he looked down at the massive bulge straining against his grey sweatpants, then looked back at you with a half-dazed, half-smirking expression.
"fuck," he laughed softly, shaking his head. "i'm calling you into the bathroom anytime i need to pee from now on."
you both chuckled, the tension melting away into sweet intimacy. you patted his hip, washed your hands one last time, and walked out of the bathroom, leaving him standing there in front of the mirror with a huge, throbbing erection trapped inside his pants.
and even after that, thanos still stubbornly refused to admit that he had a weird, dark leaning toward piss.
was it the liquid itself? the raw, total vulnerability of it? was it seeing his favorite person completely lose control in front of him? or was it seeing his least favorite person stripped of all their dignity? none of those questions had a clear answer, but no matter how hard his ego tried to deny it, his body still kept getting turned on by it every single time.
he definitely enjoyed the power trip of seeing other people completely break down and let themselves go right in front of him. but the thought of himself being the one to lose control like that? that was still very much open for debate.
the whole thing started over something stupid on the couch. you were sitting on his lap in just one of his massive, faded graphic tees and a thin pair of pink lace panties, while he was energy drinks all afternoon while working on beats, but he was just too lazy to get up and go to the bathroom. at first, he was just idly resting his hands on your waist, half-watching a show, but then you shifted, tilting your head up to capture his lips in a slow, heavy kiss.
the second your lips met his, thanos let out a low, breathy hum into your mouth. his hands slid from your waist down to your thighs, hitching your legs over his lap so you were straddling him completely. as you climbed on top of him, the sudden shift in weight pressed your core directly down against his crotch.
a sharp, involuntary gasp ripped straight through his throat. beneath the soft cotton of his sweatpants, you could physically feel his dick swell, twitching hard and growing noticeably larger and thicker right between your legs.
"fuck, baby..." he muttered against your lips, his deep voice dropping into a raspy, vibration-heavy register. "look at you... couldn't even let me finish the episode?"
"It can wait," you whispered, pulling his bottom lip between your teeth and giving it a gentle tug before leaning down to press soft, open-mouthed kisses along his jawline and down his sensitive neck.
he let out a needy, quiet whimper, his head rolling back against the leather couch cushions as his fingers tangled tightly into the hem of your shirt. every time you shifted your body, the friction of your thin pink lace panties sliding over his rough grey sweatpants sent a jolt straight to his core. the moment your clothed clit pressed right against the thick, rock-hard length tucked inside his pants, a heavy shockwave went straight to his brain.
he let out a low, guttural growl, his tatted hands instinctively snapping around your hips, digging in with white-knuckle force to pull you flush against his pelvis.
"yeah, right there... don't stop," he rasped, his eyes glassy and dark with sudden, blinding lust as his breath hitched.
it felt way too good. you were already turned on, feeling the intense heat coming off his body and hearing the pathetic, desperate noises slipping from his throat, so you began to rhythmically grind yourself down on his erection. the friction of your wet lace sliding over the heavy cotton of his pants, right over his stone-hard shaft, was driving both of you completely crazy.
inside his head, thanos was completely spiraling. his mind was spinning in a chaotic storm of pure pleasure, mounting panic, and heavy arousal. his bladder was painfully, impossibly full, pressing violently against his prostate from the inside out. every single time you drove your hips down and dragged your wet, clothed clit over his shaft, the intense physical pressure on his lower stomach made his breath hitch and his chest heave.
but the sheer sensitivity of it—the unbearable mix of his full bladder squeezing his nerves and the heavy, rhythmic friction of your body riding his cock—felt unhinged, dirty, and insanely hot. he knew he desperately needed to get up and pee right that second, but his stubborn pride and his sheer arousal kept his lips sealed. he didn't want you to stop moving, kissing, and grinding against him for even a single second.
your breathing hitched as you picked up the pace, arching your back and grinding down heavy and direct. you were getting so close, the warm dampness of your own arousal soaking through the front of your pink panties, making the friction slicker and more intense with every pass.
you whimpered, gasping into his neck as you drove your weight straight down onto his lower pelvis once more.
that specific press hit his full, pressurized bladder with so much direct force that a sudden, sharp, pathetic gasp ripped from his throat. his eyes went wide, his knuckles turning white where he was holding your hips.
"baby—wait—" he rasped out, his voice cracking, sweat glistening on his forehead as he squirmed under you. "i... fuck, i really gotta go. i need to pee so bad."
"no, not now," you whined breathlessly, completely lost in your own high, leaning down to trap his mouth in a deep, sloppy, needy kiss. "don't move, i'm so close..." to emphasize your point, you gave another hard, rolling grind straight down onto his bladder.
the sheer physical shock was too much for his strained body to handle. thanos let out a muffled, desperate groan straight into your mouth as his muscles completely betrayed him. a warm, heavy squirt of piss forced its way out past his valve, instantly soaking through his boxers and darkening the grey fabric of his sweatpants right where your crotch was locked against his.
he tried to tense up, tried to fight it and hold the rest back, but the valve was completely blown. once the floodgates opened, his entire body gave out under the overwhelming physical relief. the warm stream started flowing steadily, a thick, hot rush of liquid bleeding through his pants and completely drenching your pink lace underwear.
for him, it was the weirdest, most intense sensation he had ever felt—it was slightly uncomfortable because his dick was still completely, throbbingly hard and trapped in tight fabric, but the sheer physical relief of his overfilled bladder finally emptying made his head roll back against the couch, his chest heaving with shallow, helpless pants and embarrassed whimpers.
you felt the sudden, burning heat spreading fast between your thighs. you pulled back from the kiss with wide eyes, panting hard, and looked down at your lap. your thin pink panties were completely soaked, dripping wet and stuck to your skin. for a split second, your brain short-circuited and you thought he had somehow cum a massive, impossible amount, but as the hot liquid kept flowing without stopping, the realization hit you like a truck.
you looked up at his flushed face, your eyes wide with total shock. "Subong...?"
he couldn't even meet your gaze at first. his face was burning a deep, bright red, his lip caught tightly between his teeth as he let out another soft, embarrassed whine, completely exposed, wet, and helpless underneath you while his body finished emptying itself into both of your clothes.
but as you stared at him, taking in his flushed cheeks, his heavy breathing, and his totally wrecked, vulnerable expression, you felt zero judgment. looking down and seeing your own piss-soaked pussy visible through the sheer, wet pink fabric of your underwear sent a sudden, filthy spike of heat straight to your core.
"it's okay, baby," you whispered softly, leaning down to press a sweet, lingering kiss to his burning cheek. "i'm sorry, i didn't let you go..."
thanos blinked up at you, his heart hammering wildly against his ribs. you made no move to get off him. instead, he tentatively raised his tatted hands, placing his palms back on your hips. you instantly took it as a green light.
you lifted your hips slightly and slammed right back down onto his wet erection.
the sound in the quiet living room was instantly filthy—the heavy, loud squelch of wet, urine-soaked fabric grinding violently against wet fabric. the combination of his piss, your slick arousal, and the heavy friction was completely unhinged. you started dry humping him again, harder this time, rubbing your piss-and-cum-wet clit directly against the thick, soaked ridge of his hard dick through his pants.
hearing that dirty, wet squelching sound with every roll of your hips drove thanos completely out of his mind. his dominant streak flared back up through the haze of his embarrassment; his hands gripped your hips with bruised force, guiding your rhythm, thrusting his wet hips up to meet every single one of your grinds.
"fuck," he rasped, his eyes locking onto yours with dark, heavy intensity as a dirty smirk cut through his flushed face. "you're fucking crazy..."
you couldn't even answer him. the extra slickness and the intense heat radiating off his soaked pants pushed you right over the edge. with a long, trembling moan, your body went rigid. your pussy spasmed hard against his length, soaking your already drenched underwear with your own gushing climax. you kept humping him in slow, agonizingly sensitive rolls, riding out the tail end of your orgasm right on his lap.
watching you completely break down and cum on his piss-soaked clothes was the most turning-on thing thanos had ever experienced in his entire life. his brain completely shattered.
as your climax washed over him, his own body reached its absolute limit. with a deep, guttural moan that vibrated from the bottom of his chest, his head snapped back. right inside his soaked sweatpants, you could physically feel and see his stone-hard dick twitch violently against your crotch. thick, heavy pulses of cum shot out from his tip, filling his wet underwear and mixing directly with the lingering warmth of his piss. he bucked his hips up into you twice, letting out a shaky, breathy groan as his release emptied out inside his pants, leaving both of you completely drenched, exhausted, and tangled together on the couch.
Author’s Note: We are almost to the end of this story! Thank you to those of you that have reached out & shown TOP SPOT: AD love. Chapter 8 will be the last chapter🩵 I promise to wrap things up in a positive way…it’s been quite an angsty journey 😅
CH 7
More people have arrived, including Chae Kyoung-Sun, the art director from Squid Game and Seunghyun’s Studio54 music video. The last time you saw her was in LA when things were…less than ideal.
“Y/N!” She calls out to you. “I didn’t think I’d see you here. Is Jae-Joon with you?”
“Um, no. Not tonight.” You say quietly.
“His announced retirement from acting was a shock. What are you two going to get up to with all his free time? The tabloids mentioned a baby on the way…” She winks, before her eyes drift to your midsection. You raise your wine glass, taking a long sip, shutting down her theory.
”Oh, well. You know how the media loves rumors.” Her attention is drawn to the intricate diamond band on your middle finger. “Your ring is stunning. Jae really out did himself. It’s clear that he is dedicated to curating the most beautiful life for the two of you. I look forward to seeing it unfold.”
You smile back at her. “He is very dedicated to making his dreams come true.” You say convincingly, when you hear Seunghyun’s graveled laughter across the room, grabbing you attention. “If you’ll excuse me.”
The chimes of Seoul Chaos followed by Seunghyun’s harmonizing vocals send a chill down your spine as you recall last year.
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Your trip to LA was going to be a fresh start. You would wipe yourself clean of Seunghyun for good and move towards your new life with Jae. No more wavering.
The lust you once had for Seunghyun had been replaced with anger, which fueled your desire to make Jae’s dreams a reality, propelling the narrative forward. Jae was vocal in interviews about settling down with you and starting a family and you no longer denied it. Instead, you committed to the bit, showing affection publicly and speaking candidly about your future together when on the red carpet. The media loved you as a couple and the tabloids loved making predictions about your lives together, giving you motivation to keep going. What you didn’t know is that every wedding prediction and baby watch post was ripping Seunghyun’s heart out.
You and Jae ring in the New Year of 2025 in LA where he is filming what is said to be the biggest film of his career.
It will also be his last. After much deliberation, he’s decided to retire from acting and follow his dream of pursuing a simplistic life.
In a strange chain of events, that you could only chalk up to fate, you run into Seunghyun while at lunch with Jae. He’s telling you about the property he is purchasing when he notices someone familiar enter the restaurant. You prepare yourself for an introduction.
“Hey babe, this is IRKO. He’s been working on the sound mixing for the film soundtrack.”
“A pleasure.” You smile, extending your hand.
“So you’re the infamous Y/N.” He smiles. “I’ve heard a lot about you from Jae.” He then turns his attention behind him. “This is TOP.”
You open your mouth to speak but nothing comes out.
”Hey, Seunghyun!” Jae stands, hugging him. “Good to see you again. Your work on Squid Game was amazing. You here for promotion?”
“No, working on music actually.”
His solo album.
”You two know each other? Small world!” IRKO exclaims. “Have you met Jae’s lovely lady?”
“It’s good to see you too.” You mumble as he turns to walk towards their table.
IRKO follows after a friendly wave, oblivious to the awkwardness of the situation.
“He’s an interesting one…standoffish. No wonder things didn’t work out when you met for that art acquisition I asked about.” Jae chuckles, reflecting on the interaction. “He’s become such a recluse. It’s hard to believe he once shared a stage with G Dragon. Now that’s an idol...”
“Speaking of GD. He’s invited us to the opening Übermensh show in Korea next month…I thought it would be a good break from work.” You smile wide.
“No way! That’s awesome, babe.” He says, genuinely excited. “It’s still so wild to me that you have that kind of relationship with him.”
“I told you we were close. You just can’t seem to wrap your head around it.” You grin. You’ve been trying to allude to the impact BIGBANG has had on your life in hopes of coming clean with Jae about your past. Each time you bring it up he seems to brush it off, not wanting to fully hear what you’re saying.
Jae then jumps into a long spiel about the land he’s closing on in Jeju Island. The secluded, off the grid style location is beautiful, just not really your vibe…but it will be, you tell yourself. Your mind wanders as you look around the cafe just in time to lock eyes with Seunghyun. You remain emotionless and you can tell by his expression it hurts. Good.
As you and Jae stand to leave you pull him into a kiss. He grabs your ass in response and you let out a playful giggle in hopes of drawing attention. You look back to see Seunghyun’s jaw clench before leaving the cafe hand in hand.
————————-
A month later, you and Jae have the time of your lives at Jiyong’s concert. The after party is filled with you making introductions for Jae who is astounded by the amount of people you know in the music industry.
“My girl is a celebrity!” He says kissing you deeply. “This has been the best night. I’m so glad you pulled me away from filming. LA was really dragging me down.”
“You deserve it.” You say kissing him back. “Besides…gotta get out while we can right?” You wink, feeding into his ‘let’s start a family’ plan.
Jae is whispering something about finding a coat closet to hook up in when you look up to see Jiyong spot you from across the room. He heads directly towards you.
“Shit, that’s G Dragon.” Jae says enthusiastically. “Do you think he’s coming this way to talk with us?”
“I’m sure he is.” You say apprehensively, knowing Jiyong is coming for you.
When he reaches your table, Jiyong puts on a show. “Infamous actor Kim Jae-Joon, good to finally meet you in person.”
Starstruck, Jae grips his hand tightly. “The fact that you have heard of me floors me. It’s truly an honor. Your show was outstanding.” He looks to you, nervously. “I-I guess you know my girlfriend already?”
“I could never forget her.” Jiyong says, emotionless. “I actually need to borrow her for a moment. Hope you don’t mind Jae.” He says, flashing his million dollar smile.
“Oh, no, of course…by all means.” Jae smiles awkwardly.
“It’ll only take a minute.” Jiyong links his arm with yours and leads you towards a back hallway.
“Ji…slow down…” You prompt as he all but pushes you into the hall.
Once secluded, he lays into you. “What the fuck are you doing Y/N?”
“Good to see you too Ji…”
He stares back at you. “Are you having fun in your delusional world, playing house with your Korean actor Ken doll?”
You cross your arms, angrily. “I am living my life like he told me to Ji. If you have questions, maybe you should take it up with Seunghyun.” You see Jae searching you out in the crowd.
“Oh trust me, we’ve talked. Plenty.”
“Then you would know that HE made this choice. He’s done with me.”
“That’s not true.” Jiyong shakes his head in disagreement. “Every article released about you two, every tabloid hinting at a wedding or baby is killing him. ”
You look back at him in confusion. “He told me to choose Jae. I was fully prepared to leave but Seunghyun told me not to. He said he was bad for me. That he would just hurt me again and that I had to let him go for good. He ended things, Ji, not me.”
Jiyong stares back at you.
“I know it’s easy for you to blame me and think that I am the reason for all this after everything we have been through but this time I was all in and ready to throw this life away. Seunghyun didn’t give me the option.” You say sternly. “He doesn’t want me, Ji.”
Jiyong’s face falls. “He didn’t mean what he said…he wants to be with you. He’s just too scared to admit it.”
“He’s had a lot of time to step up and be brave.” Jae locks eyes with you across the way and waves. You put on a smile and wave back to the man that is now your future. You then pause, letting your guard down. “I never stopped loving him.” You say, breaking your gaze, returning it to Jiyong. “I love him more than he will ever understand….”
“I know…” he says quietly. “I know he’s still in love with you too… he always will be.” He pauses, then adds, “What if he told you to leave and be with him? That would change things…right?”
You shake your head. “In a perfect world…but we both know he won’t do that. I can’t keep playing this game. Jae is going to be my future now. I am going to marry him and start our life together sooner rather than later. Seunghyun has to live with that. Unfortunately, you are going to have to just pick up the pieces.”
Jiyong looks at you, sorrowfully, and nods, knowing in his heart, it’s done.
“Thank you for a great night G Dragon.” You say before turning away, back to Jae.
———————————-
When May comes all eyes are on Jae. The day of TUDUM is hectic. At the event, Jae is presenting the teaser trailer for his new film and planning to announce his retirement after its release. As a celebration, you scheduled the pick up of the David Hockney piece Seunghyun helped you acquire for that night.
The plan was to hit the red carpet, do pictures and press, enjoy the event, and then head out to pick up the piece around 8pm. Jae was elated when you told him.
“What a coincidence…I have quite the surprise arranged for you tonight as well.” He says into the crook of your neck, his hand sliding up your thigh.
“Control yourself.” You blush. “We are next on the press carpet.”
He doesn’t stop. His hands are all over you for every paparazzi photo. When you get to the press line, every question is the same. Marriage, family, future acting roles…and then Rolling Stone Korea steps in.
“Jae-Joon, you’re at your peak popularity. Your fans look forward to what you have to share with them tonight. But I think they are all wondering if the rumors are true? Is there a little action star on the way for you two?”
Jae, loving the attention, feeds into it, placing his hand just right on your waistline. “It’s all we’ve ever wanted, so only time will tell.” He winks before pulling you away.
“They are going to have a field day with that babe.” You say through laughter as you head towards the other photo-ops.
“Let them talk. We will manifest it together.” He grins.
Seunghyun lingers back in the pressline. You hadn’t noticed he was behind you and had heard the whole exchange. He saw the way Jae held onto you protectively, kissed you, touched you. And now you were…he didn’t want to think about it. He made the choice to let you go. It shouldn’t be surprising to see you moving on. He had no one to be angry with but himself. So he takes a deep breath, and does what he does best. Pretend.
——————————-
Jae leaves you to find the green room space you’ve been assigned backstage. He had his manager track down some boxes of old photos from your apartment back in Seoul so he could find the picture of himself as a kid with the painting. He wanted to bring it for good luck later tonight when the two of you picked up the painting together. You laugh at the thought of his manager lugging boxes of photos into a Netflix event.
“I apologize in advance, there was a mix up and we had to create a shared space for you and Mr. Kim with another actor.” One of the backstage managers tells you as she escorts you down a long hall.
“It’s no problem. Really.” You assure her, reaching the door. “I appreciate all your hard work. Jae and I are easy going, we are happy to share the space.”
“Please let me know if you need anything.” She replies, relieved. “Their segment is one of the first to go on so you’ll have some alone time while they’re on stage. Mr. Kim will be called for when his time arrives.”
You nod graciously and enter the room to find your bags containing your change of clothes for tonight already waiting along with…Seunghyun.
“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.” You say out loud.
“I was just as surprised as you are when they told me.” He says coldly, not looking up from his phone.
He’s wearing sunglasses and a black on black Alexander McQueen suit with star embellishments. He looks…sexy.
You grab a bottle of water from the fridge and take a long drink to distract yourself. “You didn't think to tell them it was a bad idea?”
“They didn’t give me much choice.” He says standing. “You know I prefer not to ruffle feathers if I can help it so I just let it be. I wasn’t aware being in the same room with me would be so triggering for you.”
“It’s not me I’m worried about.” You say approaching him. “A certain Dragon told me not too long ago that you’re the one who can’t handle it.” You say raising your voice.
“I’m not trying to upset you…” He says, his demeanor changing. “I go onstage soon so I’ll be out of your hair.”
You look at him, frustrated, and begin pacing. “Fine. Whatever.”
“Hey…Take a deep breath, sit.” He says gesturing to the couch. “Stress can’t be good for you and the b…” He doesn’t finish the sentence but his gaze settles on your figure.
You instinctively cross your arms over your midsection. “I’m not pregnant, if that’s what you’re insinuating. You of all people shouldn’t believe everything you see or read in the news.”
You note a flood of relief that crosses his face as there is a knock at the door.
“Mr. Choi? You’re on stage in five.” The stage manager calls through the door.
“See? I’m already gone.” He says, hands up, turning towards the door.
“Break a leg.” You tell him, as he turns to leave.
———————————-
When Jae enters a few moments later, he’s carrying a duffle bag and his demeanor has changed drastically from when you left him.
“Aw babe, you couldn’t find the photo?” You ask, disappointed for him.
He tosses the bag into the couch and looks at you. “Oh, no…I found it…along with some other memories I wasn’t aware of. Care to take a look?” He questions, gesturing to the bag.
You walk over, peering inside. What you find is your own box of photos. The one once hidden under your side of the bed. His manager must’ve misunderstood and grabbed both…You didn’t do the best at hiding it honestly. You knew this day would come, you just weren’t expecting the conversation to begin here in LA at TUDUM of all places.
“This is my photo box from when I was with YG.” You say, opening the lid.
“Sure.” He says, firmly. “But I’d say there’s more than just old dance memories in that box. Looks like you and Seunghyun were a lot closer than you initially led on.”
He went through all of them? You think to yourself as you pick up a Polaroid capturing you in Seunghyun’s lap, kissing him passionately, his hand on your hip and your hand buried in his bleached white hair.
“There’s a lot like that. Some are even more provocative. I’d say your relationship was more than a fling. ” He says, his voice laced with anger.
“I never said it was.” You attempt to keep your voice calm. “Those were your words, not mine. I just never really had the chance to…”
“Tell me you were madly in love with him?”
“Jae…some of these were taken over 15 years ago…”
“But this wasn’t.” He says holding the ultrasound photo up at you.
You open your mouth, but you can’t quite find the words to respond.
“Do you have a secret love child out there that I don’t know about? God, Y/N this is…a big thing to keep from me for so long…” He says, frustrated. “You hid a pregnancy from me…”
“I…I found out I was pregnant in 2019.”
Jae looks at the photo and back at you. “By whom? A one night stand? Tell me it was a stupid mistake.”
You look back at him, silent.
“If that baby was his Y/N…it changes everything. Tell me the baby wasn’t his Y/N…Tell me!!!”
Seunghyun returns from his Squid Game segment just as Jae’s voice intensifies.
“Oh great! This is perfect timing.” Jae’s laugh is unsettling as he turns to Seunghyun. “Maybe you can shed some light on this situation. Does this look familiar?” Jae asks, holding up the ultrasound photo. “Did you knock her up? Was this yours?” He prods.
Seunghyun winces at his words but does his best to maintain his cool. “Jae, you need to calm down. We are all adults here, we can talk about this calmly.”
“Fuck! Your expression tells me all I need to know.” Jae groans in frustration as he shifts his focus between you and Seunghyun. “So what happened to the baby?” He asks, sticking his finger in Seunghyun’s chest. “Did you make her get an abortion because the infamous TOP from BIGBANG couldn’t handle fatherhood? Didn’t want a baby throwing off your idol success?”
Seunghyun keeps his composure and says nothing, but his eyes are locked on you.
Silent tears stream down your cheeks as you gather the nerve to say your piece. “It was unexpected…but…I…”
“But what? Couldn’t fathom the idea of being a mother?”
“Don’t talk to her like that.” Seunghyun says sternly, coming to your defense, putting a comforting hand on your shoulder.
“You ran from responsibility and gave it up? Or…”
“We lost the baby.” Seunghyun finishes the sentence so you don’t have to. “Is that the answer you wanted to hear? She would’ve been an amazing mother but was robbed of the opportunity. If you would shut up for five minutes then maybe she could explain things to you.”
Jae looks at you, recalling the story shared before. “That story you told me…about your friend…”
“I wasn’t truthful…it happened to me.” You say quietly.
The color drains from his face. “Is this why you recoiled every time I brought up starting a family? Because of the baby you almost had with…him?” He points angrily at Seunghyun.
“Jae…” You sob. “I didn’t know how to tell you…I tried but…”
“You chose to lie instead. God I am so stupid!” He paces. “You’ve always acted strange around him but I just thought it was his idol status influencing you…You still have feelings for him, don’t you?”
You’re silent as Jae continues to berate you.
“You don’t want a family with me…you want one with him!”
“ENOUGH.” Seunghyun erupts. “At the end of the day, she chose you. Are you that insecure of yourself that you can’t move past this? Yes, she withheld this from you but it doesn’t change the fact that she’s WITH you. She chose YOU.”
“The two of you had a whole life together! She’d throw it all away in a heartbeat if you would take her back!” Jae shouts.
Seunghyun looks to you, eyes full of sadness.
“Tell me I’m wrong.” Jae exclaims. “Tell me I’m overreacting and paranoid. That you want a family with me. Tell me he’ll never cross your mind ever again and I’ll let all of this go. Make your choice, him or me.”
You sink to the floor where the box of photos has tumbled to the ground. The memories of a life that left you feeling fulfilled with the man you truly love are spread out before you.
“I would choose him.” You say looking up through your tears. “I would choose him a hundred times over.”
Seunghyun stands still, absorbing your words as Jae clears his throat and straightens his suit.
“I thought you might say that…”
“I tried Jae…”
“You did a great job pretending…wasting 4 years of my life.” He exhales, gathering his things. “You know…I was going to propose to you tonight. Everything was falling into place. The marriage you told me you wanted, our kids, the house in Jeju…all the stories you told me to keep hanging on. I was going to make it a reality.”
“I’m sorry…I can’t keep pretending anymore…”
“No, not that he’s here now.” He says, patting Seunghyun on the back as he approaches the door. “So thanks for setting up this acquisition for her Seunghyun, in hindsight, I guess that painting saved me from living a life of lies.”
Seunghyun crouches beside you and begins picking up the photos.
“I am going on stage soon. I’m sticking to my plan. I will announce my retirement. My life will stay on course, yours no longer concerns me. I need you gone, Y/N. Go back to Seoul and pack your things. We are done.” His voice lacking any emotion.
“But your painting…it belongs to you now.”
“They can keep it. I don’t want to remember this night.” He exhales as he stops at the door before turning to face you. “You’ve ruined that memory for me along with so many others. I’d prefer to forget you completely. This conversation is over.” He then leaves, slamming the door behind him.
ask and ye shall receive 🗣️🗣️ I literally had no idea what to do at first then I couldn’t get the idea of givin’ him som crazzzyy head out of my noggin, so here ya go 🫡
Warnings: smut (18+), weed mention, smoking weed, pills mentioned, oral (m receiving), name calling (really just bitch, cocksucker once) spit kink, deep throating, swallowing cum, reader gives thanos some crazy head at an after party he hosts that’s pretty much it, read at your own risk
Thanos was sure no one could out-do him. He was the legend, Thanos. He got whatever or whoever he wanted. He knew he was good in bed, he had countless of one night stand that left him raving reviews in the form of spammed messages asking him to come back. Admittedly, he never answered the many girls. He became uninterested in them after the night he spent with them. He was a busy man and couldn’t be bothered to return to a girl if he even had an inkling he would get bored.
So when he set his eyes on you, a cute little thing who showed up to this after party at his house with a group of friends, he thought it would be the same thing- a night of fun and then he’d be off to the next one. He was unaware of it at the time; but you were going to be much different.
He first saw you mingling with the group of girls you showed up with, immediately partaking in the drinks that were laid out on the lavish granite counter. You were in a short, little, sleeveless dress that hugged your curves in the most sinful way, one that was low cut and left little up to the imagination. Every time you giggled, the doughy flesh of your breasts would spill out even more from the tight fabric of the dress. Oh yeah, you got his attention alright.
He watched like a hawk from across the room, not even listening to the group of fanboys that were asking him about an upcoming album. You seemed meeker than your friends, as soon as your group finished a round of shots and your friends quickly scouted out men to flirt with, you didn’t. You were not going straight to a man to dance on or to leach off of like the group you showed up with, but to the corner of the living room. You made yourself comfy on the couch, paying no mind to the couple a few feet away from you damn near fucking on the couch.
He wanted you. He scouted you out and he wasn’t going to call it a good night until he got you in his bed and got to fuck you. He doesn’t even excuse himself from the group of fanboys that were talking to him, he just pushes past them and slowly makes his way over to the couch in the living room- eyes still trained on you.
He watches as you reached into your cleavage, pulling out a blunt from the inside of your dress. Thanos smirked and raised an eyebrow, you were definitely interesting. His eyes follow as you seem to look around looking for something- probably a lighter. And he takes this as the perfect opportunity to make his move.
You were looking around aimlessly, hoping to maybe catch someone’s eye nearby that had a lighter but it didn’t seem like you were going to be in luck. To your left was a couple shoving their tongues in each others mouth and to your right was a group of men standing up near the couch that were too drunk to even comprehend what the other was saying let alone understand you if you asked for a lighter…yep…looks like you were out of luck.
You pouted to yourself and were about to shove the blunt back into the top of your dress for safe keeping-You could smoke it when you got home- when the couch sinks with the weight of someone sitting down next to you. You don’t even have time to look towards the person who sat down because you jump a little when suddenly a spark of red in orange is in front of your face. It’s the flame of a lighter.
“Looked like you could use some help, couldn’t let a pretty thing like you go without a light.” A gravely voice is saying to you. You turn to your side and are met face to face with a man with purple hair. His grin was suave, he’s leaning towards you like he knows you’d be interested.
You quirk up an eyebrow and smile, “Oh, how could I ever repay you, my knight in shining armor.” You say sarcastically with a giggle. You bring the blunt up to your lips and lean it into the flame of the lighter. You take a couple puffs, making sure it’s properly lit. You’re leaning back from the lighter as he flicks it off. “You can let me get a hit of that and grace me with your name, Señorita.” The man says with a purr laced in his voice, scooting closer to you on the couch so your thighs were touching.
He was attractive…baggy clothes- a bright colored shirt and jeans. His nails were each painted a different color, hands tattooed. You can’t help the way your eyes trail up the thick black line that runs from his finger up his arm. And you couldn’t lie, the purple hair definitely worked for him. He exuded an overconfident, brazenness that only served to do him more favors. You weren’t oblivious though, you knew his type and he thought he would talk his way into your pants and ruin you. But you wanted to give him a run for his money. You wanted to ruin him.
Your grin widens, you’ll bite. You share your name, leaning more into him, making sure he can feel your thighs really touching his. “…but, I don’t share with strangers, so I’ll need your name if you want your other reward Mr. Knight.” You say after giving him your own name, your words ending with a giggle- you were going to make him think like he had the upper hand here. You knew who he was, you showed up to his after party; but you didn’t want to give him all of that satisfaction.
“Well that’s not really fair,-” he begins, “I don’t play fair” you cut him off with a sweet smile like you didn’t just interrupt him. He laughs, eyebrow lifting up inquisitively. You really got his attention now. His large hand coming to rest on your thigh, fingers lightly pressing into the flesh. “Ohhh~” He says in a sing-song tone, watching as you take another hit of the blunt he helped light. “I like you, you’re fun.” He coos. You smile around the blunt, shrugging as if you’re saying ‘oh, it’s nothing, really!’.
“Names Thanos, beautiful. The legend, Thanos.” He says, emphasizing his own name, proving your earlier observation that he seemed cocky. In some weird way, that made you just want him more. You want to see him come apart from your doing. You tilt your head like you’re questioning him but your smile widens. “See wasn’t so hard was it, Thanos?” You purr, making sure to emphasize his name with your sultry tone as you pass him the blunt.
As he takes a hit he lets out a low growl, his hand gripping your thigh tighter. When he exhales smoke is pouring out his mouth as he talks, “I could get used to hearing you say my name, sweet thing.” His hand moving higher up on your thigh, thumb slipping under the fabric of the dress that’s at your mid-thigh just the slightest bit. “Hmm, could you now?” You muse, acting like you’re not catching on to his advances.
“Don’t play dumb with me, pretty girl…I know I could make you feel real good…you know I could too.” He says, taking another hit before leaning closer to you, his nose running along the column of your neck as he passes the blunt into your hand. You hate that he makes you falter but his breath fanning against your pulse point and his hand sliding up to your inner thigh makes your mind go blank for a moment. You pull the blunt up to your lips and take your next hit, hoping the weed will calm you down a bit.
He begins to place small kisses along the expanse of your neck, trailing down to your shoulder then back up again. As you exhale your hit he’s kissing up your jaw. Turning your head the slightest bit, you nudge his face up a bit and connect your lips with his. You can’t help the grin that spreads across your lips when you feel him falter now. He wanted to be the one to initiate the kiss, he thought he was in charge here.
He regains his composure back quickly, falling into a heated rhythm against your lips. One of his hands comes up to cradle the back of your neck, pulling you into him. It’s so hungry and damn near depraved, as if neither of you had touched another human being in ages. You don’t give a single fuck about any of the party goers around you, you’re kissing him eagerly. It’s full of spit and tongue- neither of you would have it any other way.
His hands are all over you, you’re having to strategically hold your hand with the blunt out to make sure you don’t burn anything or either of you. He’s grabbing at your body over your dress, moaning into your mouth anytime he gets a handful. You two part from the kiss breathless and connected by a string of mixed saliva. Thanos is practically picking you up off the couch to put you into a standing position. “I got a place we can go, Baby…I need to feel you…” he’s growling as he pulls you back into him by your waist, connecting you two in a quick messy kiss once again.
You giggle into the kiss, pushing on his chest with your hand that doesn’t have the blunt. “Well, ya gotta take me there first. Can’t do that if I have your tongue down my throat can we?” You joke, batting your eyes up at him. He can feel the blood rush to his cock, something about you just makes him feel like a feral dog. He needs you. He feels like if he doesn’t get the opportunity to fuck you he may die. His cock is throbbing in his jeans and you haven’t even touched him yet. He’s grabbing your wrist and leading you down some hallways, down a staircase and into what looks like a music studio.
When the door shuts behind you, he’s on you once again. He finds your lips with ease, almost like he’s devouring you. He wastes no time in slipping his tongue past your lips and licking around the entirety of your mouth. His kiss is intoxicating, it has you whining into his mouth and gripping at the fabric of his shirt. His large hands are on your ass, groping and squeezing as he pulls you into him. You can feel his erection against your lower stomach and it only makes you whine even more. When you two pull away for air he’s looking down at you like you’re a work of art- your face flushed, hair tousled the slighted bit, looking up at him through your thick lashes and your lips wet with his spit- it’s truly a sight to behold.
You smile, raising your hand up to his lips and placing the blunt in his mouth. You’re lightly shoving him backwards, trying to guide him to the couch that you spotted when you first came into the room. He chuckles, his hand reaching up to take the blunt from you and inhale. He walks backwards, parting away from you. He makes his way over to the couch and sits down, all while his eyes never leave yours.
He’s leaned back on the couch in the room, legs spread wide, blunt hanging loosely from his lips. He’s expecting you to come sit nice n’ pretty on his lap. Letting him take the lead. But you surprise him. You’re walking over to him, placing your hands on his thighs and slowly lowering yourself on your knees in between his legs.
“Oh? Eager are we?” He rasps with a low chuckle, looking down at you with a twisted grin on his lips- it’s cute, you think, he still believes he has the upper hand here. “Mhm…” you hum out, fingernails digging lightly into his jean clad thighs. You lean down, holding his gaze as you bring your face oh so close to the tent that’s forming in his pants. “But you aren’t one to talk, are you?” You say, a wicked grin on your lips.
This was the first instance where Thanos got a feeling that he was in over his head. He could feel the feeling of your lips ghost over his erection as you spoke. You were looking up at him like a siren trying to lure him into the depths of the sea. He chokes on the smoke of the blunt a bit, coughing out and trying to cover it with a chuckle. “Can you blame me?” He rasps, regaining his composure and shifting on the couch trying to thrust his hips towards your face.
You somehow read him too well, you move back so he doesn’t get the friction he desires. You tilt your head teasingly, letting out a giggle and sitting back on your heels. “I suppose I can’t…” you coo out, your hands running up his thighs and trailing up his torso. You can feel how his stomach clenches under your touch, only more proof he is more affected by you than he lets on.
His head kicks back against the couch, a sigh escaping his lips, smoke billowing out of his mouth. He assumes you’ll continue your ministrations, feel him up desperately like the many women he’s been with before….but the feeling stops. You’re standing up a bit to lean forward and take the blunt out of his hands.
His head whips up, he’s looking at you first with a hint of desperation but he catches himself, he twists his expression into a smooth, suave, shit-eating grin. You can’t have that. Guess you have to work a bit harder.
You put the blunt to your lips with one hand, the other hand trails down his stomach and begins to dance along the button of his jeans. He draws in a sharp breath and trains his eyes on your hand, watching excitedly as your manicured nails fall to the bulge in his pants. The feather light touches that caress his throbbing cock makes his heart jump in his chest. And when he turns his eyes up to look at you and he sees your wild smirk and the smoke falling from your plump lips- he really begins to think he might have met his match.
You sit back on your heels, pulling your hands away from him completely. You hit the blunt again, slowly, dragging out the whole process. Thanos wishes he had his phone handy, he wanted to take a picture; the visual of you sat all pretty on your knees between his legs, hitting the blunt and looking up at him through your thick lashes like some vixen- it was a real work of art. There was just one issue…your hands weren’t on him.
He looks at you incredulously, almost irritated. “Hm?” You hum out around the blunt, “I’m busy hitting the blunt…my blunt…” you remind him, the blunt you were both smoking- the one he was also hitting, was yours. He didn’t put up for it or even roll it so he truly couldn’t argue with you for smoking it. “My hands are a little busy…you could help me out…” you say, nodding towards his pants, pointing towards the button and zipper.
“Shouldn’t you do it? Unwrap your gift?” Thanos teases back, rolling his hips up to emphasize the very large tent in his pants. Ohhhhh, he was so cocky. You bite your lip and shrug, “hmm, but my hands are so busy..” you say, one hand holding the blunt the other lying idly on your plush thigh. He scoffs and nods towards your hand on your thigh, “Ya only need one hand for the blunt and one for my pants, sweets.” He purrs out, looking at you with heavy eyes and a lazy smirk. He was definitely a delicious man but you weren’t going to give in so easily.
Your hand on your thigh picks up, caressing your waist over the fabric of your dress. Your hand gropes at your own breast, squeezing the flesh and massaging it in your hands as you bring the blunt back up to your lips and inhale. As you exhale your hit, this smoke cascading out of your nose and lips, your fingers grip at the neck line of your dress- pulling down.
You can see the way his breath genuinely catches in his chest- his breathing completely halting as he waits expectantly to see the perfect set of tits he knows is hiding behind the fabric of your dress. “I mean I said my hands were busy…but if you want me to stop what I’m doing to mess with the button n’ zipper you could undo f’me…” you coo, your words accompanied by a playful tilt of your head, eyebrows upturned to feign a saddened expression; worst of all, your hand paused on your dress, the fabric pulled down almost enough to reveal your perky nipples- but it wasn’t enough.
You can’t help the laugh that comes from you when you watch as he scrambles to work his pants open, nearly jumping off the couch. “N-no! I can do it!” He calls out a little too excitedly, his painted nails fumble with the button, he’s chuckling and clearing his throat to try and cover up his eagerness. “Keep doin’ what you were doin’, pretty. I don’ wanna stop you.” Thanos encouraged, his voice back to the same smug tone and carries that cocky aura that you want so desperately to break.
You wait for him to free his cock out of his boxers and jeans. When he does you see exactly why he has such a pompous, cocky aura- he has the cock to go with it. It’s thick, long, and has a mean curve to it that you know would reach all the right places. Biting your bottom lip, you nod in approval, your hand on your dress pulling the neckline down all the way. The fabric of the dress bunches under your breasts, allowing the doughy flesh to fully be revealed to his hungry eyes.
“Fucking hell…ain’t you just a sight…” he murmurs, words barely audible as he looks at your tits. Just when he thought the view couldn’t get better, it did. You sat so prettily in between his knees, perfect tits on display, thick thighs splayed out as you kneeled on the floor. The corner of your lips twitch up when you see his cock twitch against his stomach at the sight of you. “Was gonna ask if you like what you see…” your voice trails off as you lean in closer to him, warm breath fanning over the underside of his cock. It twitches at the sensation, his abdomen tightening as he swallows a groan, “…but seems like you’re already tellin’ me the answer.” You purr, eyes flicking up from his cock to lock with his, making sure he knows you see every reaction he has towards you.
“‘M a man with a pretty girl…with the most perfect set of tits…” he drawls out, reaching down with one hand to grab at one of your breasts, molding the flesh in his hands. Your smile only widens when his cock jumps once more when he feels you in his hands. “…sitting in front of me…of course my dicks gonna be hard, sweetness…’s all for you.” He says, pulling his hand away from your breast and leaning back on the couch. His hips shift up, trying to drag his cock along your lips.
But you move back.
You can see the way his eyebrows knit together in desperation before he is chuckling. “Aren’t you just a little minx?” Thanos says, staring down at you with red tinted eyes and a wicked grin, his arms sprawled lackadaisically against the back of the couch. You tilt your head and shrug, letting out a small hum as you bring the blunt up to your lips and take another hit. You hold it a minute before letting it go, then you’re moving closer to him once more, both your hands running up his thighs, “I have no idea what you mean…just didn’t wanna waste the blunt.” You say as you lower your face inches away from his cock, parting your lips like you were gonna take him in your mouth- but you don’t- you snake your way up his body, leveling your face with his.
You bring your hand with the blunt up to his lips and nod to it. “C’mon don’t let it go to waste.” You tease. His lips wrap around the blunt, taking it from you. With your hands now free you run them up and down his thighs once more as you settle yourself in a comfortable position. When your warm hand wraps around the base of his cock his sucking in a sharp breath and sucking in more smoke than he intended. He composes himself and stifles his coughs, eyes focused intently on the way your hand wraps around him as he blows out his hit.
You don’t move though, and when he looks up from the view he’s bee graced with to meet your eyes once more, he thinks your gaze alone could make him cum. You’re already looking directly at him, eyes hooded and tinged such a pretty red, a hungry primal desire swirling in your gaze. Your head nods towards the blunt, “It’s puff, puff, pass…ya gotta take another hit, silly.” You say so sweetly, so innocently- his mind feels fuzzy. He can do nothing but obey you, bringing his hand back up to his lips and inhaling a shaky hit of the bitter plant. You smile, like you’ve accepted an offering he’s given you, and your lips part.
He chokes on his hit when the first thing you do isn’t lick a stripe up his cock or kiss the tip like so many of the other girls he’s got with before but you hover over him, hold your hair back, purse your lips and spit down onto the head of his cock. It’s lewd and messy, the warmth of your spit dripping down onto his throbbing cock has his hips jerking up in your hand.
Your head tilts back up to look at him, like you’re mocking him for his reaction. And you are. You grin wide at him, dropping your tongue out of your mouth to drop even more spit messily down his cock. “F-fucking C-christ..” Thanos shudders out, his hand raising shakily to his lips to hit the blunt once more, his eyes rolling into the back of his head as he takes a drag. When he exhales he opens his eyes and locks his eyes with yours. “Fucking nasty aren’t you?” He chides, trying to regain his composure.
You hold his gaze, squeezing the base of his thick cock in your fist before you begin to twist your wrist up and down his length oh-so-strategically. “You have no fucking idea….” You coo in a low voice, looking at him like he’s your prey. Oh yeah, he’s in over his head. You have him completely wrapped around your finger.
“Lemme get a hit real quick, yeah?” You say, your voice an insanely drastic innocent, sweet tone that has his mind spinning again. He doesn’t understand how you can switch from such a vixen to a cute innocent thing in a matter of seconds. You’re leaning forward, hand still working up and down his dick, looking at his hand expectantly. When he raises his hand to your lips to hold the blunt for you, you’re laughing around it as you take a hit when you feel each frantic jerk and shake of his hand as he tries to keep himself sane as you’re jerking him off in a way he’s never felt before.
Everytime your hand makes its way to the tip of his cockhead, manicured thumb running over his weeping slit before going to massage right under his tip, he thinks he’s going insane. You have to be some succubus that was summoned from some otherworldly realm, maybe you put some aphrodisiac in the blunt- he didn’t know, all he could think about was how fucking good your hand felt wrapped around him.
You take a drag and pull back, holding the hit in and smirking at him. He can see the mischievous glint in your eyes, he knows you’re about to make him see stars. In an instant, you’re sinking your mouth down onto him, nearly swallowing his cock to the base, the thick trail of smoke from the hit you took flowing out your nose. To top it all off, you didn’t cough once. And you’re immediately working your soft, pillowy lips up and down his cock.
“F-fucking hell, oh my g-god!” The purple haired man is choking out, hand flying to the back of your head and gripping your hair into a makeshift ponytail. “N-nasty fu- hah! Fucking bitch.” He groans, head tilting to the side ever so slightly to get a better view of you taking his dick in your mouth.
You’re sinking down onto him nearly all the way off the bat, taking him into the warm, inviting tightness that was your throat. A choked sound reverberates through the room- and it wasn’t from you. Thanos has no idea what planet you spawned from but it couldn’t be from earth. Your mouth, you were making his balls tighten in ways he has never felt. You’re swallowing around him and moaning, the vibrations doing nothing to help him keep his composure.
Your eyes meet his, and you even wink at him as you take him deeper into your mouth. Your tongue works along his girth in ways he can’t even comprehend. He can feel himself about to cum, it’s embarrassingly quick. “H-hah…why d-don’t you slow down, y-yeah.” He’s gasping out in a pathetic attempt to seem cocky- like he was still the one in charge.
You pull off of him in a mess of spit and look up at him with a teasing smile. Your mouth is covered in strings of your saliva, connecting your swollen lips to his throbbing cock. “What? Can’t take it?” You chide as your hand still works up and down his veiny length, every twist of your wrist has his hips frantically jerking up to meet your movements.
Thanos sucks in a heavy breath, looking down at you like you were some goddess that he’s hallucinating; maybe those pills he popped before the party were stronger than he thought. “O-oh I can take it pretty…” he hums, his words shaky, a tattooed hand reaching down to cup you jaw, thumb gliding over your bottom lip, smearing the spit on your lips around. “Jus’ wanna savor it is all. Want ya’ to really feel every inch”
You smile wider, taking his thumb into your mouth, sucking the digit between your soft lips and twirling your tongue around it. Your eyes never leave his, you haven’t broken eye contact once. A sound akin to a growl reverberates in his chest as he looks down at you, god you were dangerous.
You make a show out of releasing his finger out of your mouth. Another groan is ripped from his lips at the sight, watching with a hunger filled gaze as you drool down onto his cock, using your hand to spread the wetness along his length expertly- still never breaking eye contact. Oh, you were going to kill him before the night was over.
You sink back down into him, but this time, so very slowly. And when you start to do what he asked so nicely for, he realizes he made a mistake. It makes every moment you make so much more intense, you’re inching down on him, sucking him in before pulling back at a leisurely pace. Thanos his heaving heavy breaths, his stomach clenching sporadicly every time you take more of him into the warm haven that was your mouth. His bottom lip is caught in his teeth, he’s letting out soft, shaky groans, eyes observing the mess of spit that collects on his pelvis from you sucking him off.
“F-fuck your mouth feels so good.” He hisses out, head pushing you down more. You’re knitting your eyebrows together and letting out a muffled ‘hmpf’ around his cock that has him letting off a choked sound. You’re pulling off and the whine that’s ripped from his lips when your warm mouth pulls away from his hefty cock is downright sinful, it has your pussy throbbing. “You told me to go slow. I was going slow….” You purr out, raising a challenging eyebrow.
“Okay! ‘M sorry baby, please…I know you can take it…wanna see you take it all” he pleads, hand scratching gently at your scalp like he’s petting a cat, trying to sweeten you up. “You’re right…I can.” You say with a teasing smile, wrapping your lips around his pink tip. You suck him greedily, tongue lapping at his weeping slit that continuously drips pre-cum. His head is falling back on the couch and he’s groaning a broken string of curses and your name.
You don’t waste time, you give him exactly what he wants- you slide down his cock and swallow around him. He lets out a gasp and surges further into your mouth when he feels his cockhead slip past the tight ring of your throat. You’re gagging and choking around him, but you don’t pull away- you take it. And when he manages to get the strength to open his eyes and pick his head back up to look down at you, he’s greeted by a beautiful sight. Your makeup has been smeared, tears are collecting in your lashes making them clump into groups, your face is covered in spit and your lips are stretched so wide around his cock.
The hand not holding your head comes down to cup your cheek, thumb brushing over the area where his cock vapes your mouth. “T-taking me so fucking well, fucking hell, your mouth f-feels so fuckin good..” he babbles out, hips thrusting up into your mouth, making you choke and gag more around him, “mhmmm, that’s it…” he muses down at you through gritted teeth, “messy fuckin’ girl.” He’s practically growling like an animal now.
And you just take it, eyes looking up at him so prettily, still tinted red and heavy lidded from the weed, choking on his cock as you eagerly take more of him into your mouth. “Y-you g-gunna let me cum in your mouth?” He questions, his eyebrows upturned as if he’s trying to not blow his load in that exact moment. You nod, as best as you can with his cock in your throat, and let out a muffled ‘mhm!’.
“Ohmygod…fuck!” He nearly yells, “such a good fuckin’ cocksucker.”
You pull your hands off his thighs and put them behind your back, sinking down fully until your nose brushes the trimmed hairs on his pelvis. He’s letting out a choked moan of your name, it’s probably the sweetest sound you’ve ever heard. His head kicks back once more and both his hands come up to cover his face. You can see the way his thighs tense and untense rapidly, you’re sure if he’s s shoes were off you could see his toes curling.
You flatten your tongue out, the tip of it coming out of your mouth, sinking him deeper into the salvation that was your throat as your tongue laps at his balls. You’re intentionally letting out more moans, gags, and choked coughs around his dick, adding to the spit that dirties his balls, pelvis, and surely the couch under him.
You’re pulling back for air quickly, only to return to sucking on his tip, hand working what wasn’t in your mouth at the moment. Your other hand finds purchase on his balls, cupping them and massaging them in your hand. He drops one of his hands from his face, he’s biting the palm of the other- you’re sure his eyes are starting to water now. “Fuck, y-you’re hah! You’re gonna suck me dry s-sweetheart.” He’s panting out, his face his flushes red and the hand that’s not up near his face is gripping the large cross locket he wore like he was trying to pray to whatever Devine intervention that occurred within the world, thanking whatever it was for bringing him the gift that was you.
You moan around him, taking more of him in and removing your hand from his shaft, like you’re just encouraging him to make a mess of your throat- you are. “‘M about to fucking cum..” Thanos rasps, his hand both flying to the back of your head to push you down his cock. You’re letting out a choked moan and gagging around him, it only makes him chuckle. “Yeaahhhh that’s it, take it allll in, I know you can fit it.” He drawls out, fucking his cock deeper into your throat.
You look up at him so sweetly, begging for him to paint your throat white. Your tongue works eagerly against him, tracing each vein it could reach like you’re trying to memorize them. When you do that, it’s over for him. He’s pushing you all the way down so your nose presses against his happy trail once again and cumming harder than he thinks he’s ever cum before.
“F-fuck! Ohmyfuckinggod!” He chokes out as he’s painting your throat white, his eyes were fighting themselves to stay open and not roll to the back of his skull so he can imprint the image of you, swallowing his cum, nose pressed to his pelvis, looking up at him with tears in your eyes, in his mind forever. “So fuckin’ good, swallow it all…yeahhh there ya go.” he growls, holding you down. When he feels your throat constrict around him as you greedily swallow down everything he has to offer, he’s seeing white.
His head falls to the side to rest on his shoulder then roll to rest on the back of the couch, chest heaving. His hands drop from your head. He expects you to pull off of him, to sit back and bask in the mess you made of him. But you were never one to be predictable, he should have known that in the little time he’s had with you.
You only slide half way off of him, your mouth continuing to suck. The electric-like jolt that runs through his body is almost comical. You are genuinely sucking everything he has to offer out of him. “E-easy baby…g-gotta give me a minute.” He huffs out, breathless and shaking. You slide off him agonizingly slow, his body damn near vibrating the entire time.
“Awhhh” you coo mockingly, it makes his softening dick jump pathetically. Just your teasing voice alone, breath still fanning his cock makes him start to grow hard once more, it’s nearly painful with how overstimulated he was. “You’re no fun…” you pout up at him, “You mean to tell me I already sucked you dry?” You say with a playful tilt of your head as you begin to stand up off the floor.
You wipe the corners of your mouth from the spit and cum that soaked your face. You bring the fingers you used to clean yourself up to your lips and suck them into your mouth, tasting the debauched mixture. Thanos looks at you with blown pupils and a flushed face. “I don’t think I’ve never had head like that…” he breathes out with a lazy, blissful grin. “Well, the night’s just getting started.” You hum, straddling him in one quick motion.
When he feels the heat of your cunt he hisses and looks down. Your short dress has long since ridden up giving him a perfect view of your pussy. “No panties? You dirty fuckin’ bitch.” He says, with a hungry lilt to his voice. His cock, now semi-erect twitches against your puffy cunt, already becoming soaked with your arousal. “S-such a pretty pussy…” he says, still trying to catch his breath, his lip becoming caught between his teeth as he stares at the near angelic sight before him.
“What was that about needing a minute?” You tease, looking down at his cock, the tip leaking another round of pre-cum. “Yeah, yeah,” he says dismissively, still not wanting to admit just how fucked out you got him by some head. His hands come to grip your hips, “imma need your number and imma take you out on a date sometime, now c’mon..” he says with a dopey smile, “face down ass up, I wanna see your ass bounce against me, pretty girl.” He rambles as he laughs, pushing you by the shoulder so you’re lightly falling to the side onto the plush couch and he’s working quickly- manipulating you onto all fours, all while you’re giggling.
He didn’t care if it was his after party he was missing. All the party goers could do without his attendance for a little while longer. He thought he would never get bored of you. And he wasn’t right !!
As always I hope you guys enjoyed! I’m sorry it wasn’t a full blown smut! I’ve been working on a bunch of things at once to try and make sure I don’t get a block on one fic or another. This just so happened to be the one I managed to get done first. Work is also hectic right now so please forgive my trash posting schedule 🙏🙏 I LUH YEW GUYS SO BAYDDD - <3 kiwi
Warning: Swearing. Smoking. Flirty Thanos x Reader. Sexual Innuendos.
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚˚ʚ♡ɞ˚˚ʚ♡ɞ˚˚ʚ♡ɞ˚˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
"Señorita, I need you. Call me."
A long time ago, you remember reading an old quote that said that whenever someone fools you once, it is on them; but when they fool you twice, the actions after the fact are then solely on you.
You rolled over to your side, still holding your phone, as you replayed the message, his voice deep and desperate; you could tell he was tired. Tired from what you did not know or ask. It was not very often that Thanos asked you for favors, let alone would let it slip that he needed someone, but something in you was nagging at you to return the call.
To be honest if you had actually gotten the call in time you were not sure if you would have answered or not, but now that he took the time to leave you a voicemail, to let you know he neeeded you, the tables have turned.
Slowly, you managed to press the "Return Call" button and brought the phone's speaker to your ear. You expected the phone to ring more than once, or even go to his voicemail, but it only rang once before his voice was soon in your ears once again.
His voice was louder than it was on the voicemail, more urgent. Maybe he really did need you after all.
"My house. Now. And stop by the store. My goddamn vape ran out. Blueberry Crush." You could feel yourself nodding, even though he was not able to see you.
The inside of your cheek was met with your teeth as you tugged on the sensitive skin, desperately trying to think as to why he would need you, but still feeling the surge of electricity run through as to what and why you needed to be there so urgently.
Thanos did not live very far from you, but the line at the local convenience store in your shared neighborhood was busier than usual. You could feel your feet rocking and back and fourth as you nervously rubbed your thumb along the front of the box the vape came in. Finally, it was your turn, and you smiled warmly at the cashier, knowning that was something they did not get very often.
"This all?" Your eyes scanned the area in front of you, feeling like it was your first time here. You eventually found a little display that had mood rings on display. A simple piece plastic that was suppose to wrap around your finger and tell you what you were feeling, but in reality probably adjusted and changed due to body temperature.
Quickly, you grabbed one out of the secured slot and placed it next to the vape, thinking it would not hurt to humor your inner child. You wished the cashier a good day, and slid the mood ring on your right middle finger as you walked out of the store, making your way to where Thanos was.
It had not even been two minutes that you left the store before you could feel your phone buzzing in your hand, the vibration making you jump slightly.
"Hello?"
"Señorita, where the hell are you? I fucking need you." You smiled softly to yourself, reminding him you needed to make a stop and you would be there soon. The reflection of your mood ring caught your attention as you hung up the phone.
Pink: Nuturing, Loving, Grateful.
Before long, you were standing in front of Thanos' door, your free hand that was not holding the box with his vape, was about to knock on his door before the door had quickly opened, nearly knocking you to your feet as you could feel someone's hands on your wrist as they quickly brought you inside, the door closing behind you.
"Thank God you are here,"
Your chest rose a few times as you tried to reduce the minor anxiety attack that took over.
Gray: Unsettled, Confused, Stresssed.
The colors were indeed changing with your mood, and you finally felt yourself relax as Thanos stood before you. His purple hair was a mess... literally, and you could see tiny little specs of purple on his face and even on the oversized shirt he was wearing.
Suddenly, it dawned on you why he needed you.
"Thanos... What have you done?"
His hands were on your wrist again, you could feel one of his fingers gliding against yours, one of his rings that he wore gently scraping against the cheap plastic on the mood ring you just bought. A low gasp escaped your lips, making them part slightly, as you felt him grab the boxed vape from your grasp, the sound of the box being ripped open and thrown on the floor following after, and the sound of the crackle from the vape mechanics and the smell of blueberry filling your lungs as you watched him take a hit, his pupils dialating almost instantly from the relief it gave him.
"I don't know what the fuck you are talking about..." Another hit.
Slowly, you felt your own eyes get a little hazy as you stepped closer to him, his height towering above you as you poked him on the chest, obviously pointing at the purple stains all over his top of choice.
"Your shirt says otherwise. Were you trying to do dye your own hair?"
Thanos fell quiet, and as a reflex, he ran his hand through his hair, getting even more of the purple dye all over his hand, all over the rings he wore.
"Fuck. Did I make that much of a mess?"
You smiled. He definitely did, and you could already see the spots on his head where he missed.
Lilac: Calming, Soothing, Pleasant.
"Just a little here and there. Let me take care of you..." you did not mean for the last part to come out like an invitation, but if definitely sounded like one, causing Thanos' eyes to light up momentarily, his lips curving into a tight smirk when your hand grabbed his hand and guided him up the stairs.
"Fiesty. So goddamn to eager to get me all alone. You must have other plans."
In that moment you were so glad you were moving fast so he did not see the blush that heated your cheeks.
Thanos had plopped down in a chair he brought, his eyes watching you as you mixed together the remaining of his signature purple dye, the gloves you wearing made slight crinkle when you finished stirring together the dye and bleach combo. Your nostrils were filled with the smell of blueberry again as you could tell Thanos was taking another hit of his vape, pleased with the purchase you made for him.
"You look so fucking sexy with those gloves on... Like you are going to dominate me or sum" You could feel your cheeks burning again as you stepped closer to him, your fingers gently massaging into his scalp and the feeling of his fingers hands gripping into your waist to steady you– clearly getting purple dye on your pants, but in the moment you did not care.
Sky Blue: Soothing, Relaxing, Focused.
Thanos was watching you, and you both knew it. He was not only watching you to learn how to do his own hair better, but he was also watching you because he liked watching you; the way your fingers worked his scalp and how your hips were constantly moving, despite the grip he had on them to try and keep you in one place, and more importantly how every time you had to get the top pieces of his hair, you had to stand on your tippy toes and real close to him, your tits practically begging his eyes to look at them.
Finally, your body relaxed and you admired your finished product, Thanos' hair was perfect.
You had stepped back to admire him, his hands that were gripping your hips were released and you involuntarily shivered at the lack of contact, but you remained proud of your work. You stepped aside to let him admire himself in the mirror, his hands running through his hair again, the smirk creeping across his lips once again, indicating how happy he was.
"Señorita I look so good. You did so fucking good for me. My own personal stylist." A low giggle escaped your vocal cords as you smiled wide, admiring him yourself, bringing your own hand to his hair, the plastic of the mood ring glittering against the lights in his bathroom.
Red: Passion, Power, Energy.
"It does look really good. You look really good," Thanos' hands snaked around your waist, moving your body so you were now sitting on the cold countertop in his bathroom, your eyes fluttering at the sudden contact as you watched his hands; the grip he recently had around your hips was once again present as you felt the metal on his hand dig into you, piercing your skin like a tattoo.
"S'all thanks to you, baby"
His words came out so damn smooth that for a moment, you believed that you were actually his baby. The piercing in your hip came to a hault as one hand kept you steady and the other was lifting your hand up, a small crinkle of Thanos' nose made you giggle again as he admired your hand, looking at the mood ring on your finger.
"What's this, baby? A silly little mood ring?"
Your mouth opened slightly, trying to think of a smart answer to reply with when you felt Thanos' body shift so he was even closer to you, his heartbeat practically thumping against yours as you swallowed hard, looking down at your hand and then back up to him, your lips just barely touching his...
"It's orange. Orange could suggest that I am craving excitement, and I am feeling confident and affectionate. Want to play a game and figure out what I am?"
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚˚ʚ♡ɞ˚˚ʚ♡ɞ˚˚ʚ♡ɞ˚˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
Authors Note: this was a fun one to write. I had been feeling a little uninspired after part three of "Text Messages + Photos" but I finally wrote up at least 10 different titles that I want to eventually write up for Thanos and Seunghyun. Enjoy !!
thanos is the type of guy to stay up until 4am aggressively arguing with random teenagers on twitter who said his rap flow was mid, typing furiously with his painted fingernails and waking you up just to ask, "babe, tell them my verse on track three went crazy, tell them right now."
thanos is the type of guy to try and cook a fancy dinner for you to prove he’s a good boyfriend, get completely overwhelmed by three different timers going off, drop a hot pan, and just sit on the kitchen floor staring at the mess until you come in and tell him it's okay.
thanos is the type of guy to buy some completely useless, ridiculously expensive collectible shoe or gadget because a hypebeast video told him to, and then try to hide the box in the closet so you won't give him that disappointed look that makes him feel like an idiot.
thanos is the type of guy to start overthinking every mistake he’s ever made the second the room goes dark, staring at the ceiling and biting the skin around his nails, convinced that it’s only a matter of time before you realize how broken his life actually is and leave him.
thanos is the type of guy to get completely defensive and hostile if you bring up his past failures, yelling to scare you off, only to break down and apologize five minutes later because he’s terrified he pushed you away.
thanos is the type of guy to follow you through the grocery store aisles like a lost puppy, holding onto the back of your shirt so he doesn't get separated, but the second you aren't looking, he’ll sneak five boxes of sugary kids' cereal and three neon energy drinks into the cart.
thanos is the type of guy to look at a text from his mom for an hour before replying, his chest tightening with so much guilt and anxiety that he physically starts shaking, feeling like he’s just a disappointment wrapped in expensive clothes.
thanos is the type of guy to walk a step ahead of you in public with a clenched jaw, looking like he’s ready to swing on anyone who gets too close, but the second you pocket your hand in his jacket, his shoulders instantly drop and his entire posture goes soft.
thanos is the type of guy to start a playful argument just to get you to shut him down, deliberately push your buttons until you finally snap, grab him by the wrist, and tell him to behave—which is exactly when his attitude evaporates and he melts right into your space.
thanos is the type of guy to steal all the blankets in the middle of the night, wrapping himself up into a giant, expensive cocoon, but the second you try to pull a corner back over yourself, he’ll instinctively wake up, whimper, and pull your entire body flush against his chest so you can't move away.
thanos is the type of guy to get so incredibly flustered when you take control that he loses his breath, his eyes going wide and glassy as he looks up at you from the bed, his usual loud mouth completely useless because he’s too busy trying to process how good it feels to just obey you.
thanos is the type of guy to act like a Velcro puppy the morning after you’ve been strict with him, wrapping his heavy arms around your waist and burying his face in your chest, whining and complaining the second you try to get out of bed because he needs to know you’re still holding onto him.
thanos is the type of guy to stay up until 4am aggressively arguing with random teenagers on twitter who said his rap flow was mid, typing furiously with his painted fingernails and waking you up just to ask, "baby, tell them my verse on track three went crazy, tell them right now."
thanos is the type of guy to get a tiny scratch on his knuckle from something stupid like opening a box, and act like he survived a street fight, showing you the mark with a totally serious face until you roll your eyes and put a band-aid on it.
thanos is the type of guy to get an absolute wave of panic when the apartment is too quiet, immediately scrolling through his phone to find a video or a song to blast just so he doesn't have to sit alone with his own thoughts for five minutes.
thanos is the type of guy to blindly trust someone who gives him a little bit of attention or a "good business deal," get completely scammed, and then suffer in silence because he’s too embarrassed to admit to you that he got played like an idiot again.
thanos is the type of guy to wake up at 11am with his bright purple hair standing completely on end like a troll doll, stumble into the kitchen wearing nothing but baggy sweatpants, and just lean his entire heavy body weight against your back while you’re making coffee, refusing to let go until he gets a morning kiss.
thanos is the type of guy to hold your hands in the middle of the night, staring into your eyes with total intensity, and map out your entire life together—naming the kids you’re gonna have, picking out the house with the big yard, promising he’s gonna buy you the biggest rock once his next check drops—and then completely block your number the very next morning because the weight of his own promises gave him a panic attack.
thanos is the type of guy to text you a paragraph out of nowhere three months after ghosting, saying some cryptic shit like "i had to face my demons, you deserve the world and i was drowning," just to show up at your apartment at 3am looking miserable and pathetic, knowing damn well you'll let him back in because he looks so broken.
thanos is the type of guy to swear on his mother’s life that he’s done with the clubs, the drugs, and the sketchy crypto groups, crying in your lap and begging you to believe he’s changing, only for you to find a wrapper in his jacket pocket or see him tagged in a club story on instagram two days later, proving he literally ain't shit.
thanos is the type of guy to get a massive wave of relationship anxiety, convince himself that you’re "too good for him" and that he’s gonna ruin your life anyway, and then intentionally pick a massive, toxic fight over absolutely nothing just to give himself an excuse to run away before things get too real.
thanos is the type of guy to swear he needs his "space" when getting into bed because he gets too hot, sprawling out across eighty percent of the mattress like a starfish. but thirty minutes after falling asleep, his brain completely switches back to velcro-puppy mode; he will blindly crawl across the bed in his sleep, heavy and completely dead to the world, until he can wrap both arms tightly around your waist, throw his leg over yours, and bury his face right into your neck, snoring softly.
thanos is the type of guy to use his own deep-seated trauma and childhood issues as a permanent get-out-of-jail-free card, crying and acting vulnerable the second you try to hold him accountable for lying, making you feel like the bad guy for being upset that he broke another promise.
thanos is the type of guy to twitch and mutter lines from his verses in his sleep when he's stressed about a track, vibrating with anxious energy until you sleepily reach over, tangle your fingers into his messy purple hair, and give it a firm, steady tug. the second he feels that physical constraint, his entire body instantly goes totally limp, letting out a long, pathetic sigh as he settles down and sleeps like a baby for the rest of the night.
thanos is the type of guy to see you finally moving on, posting a picture out with someone else or just looking happy, and immediately spiral into a manic panic—spamming your phone with calls, leaving whiny voicemails saying he bought the ring, and begging you not to give up on him right when he was "ready to commit."
thanos is the type of guy to search his own name on social media every single hour, sorting by "latest" just to read the hate comments, getting physically sick over what random strangers say about him but completely unable to stop looking.
thanos is the type of guy to hoard old hard drives full of unreleased music that he’s too terrified to drop, constantly tweaking the audio and changing his verses because he’s paralyzed by the fear that the public will laugh at him like they did when he choked in the tournament finals.
thanos is the type of guy to act like he’s too cool for mainstream success, talking shit about idol groups and pop stars in interviews, but secretly blast their high-energy pop songs in his headphones at the gym because the beat makes him feel like a winner.
thanos is the type of guy to pick a super intense action movie or a gritty crime documentary to show you how "hardcore" his taste is, but within twenty minutes, he’s not even looking at the screen. he’ll start shifting closer and closer to you on the couch, fidgeting with his rings and checking your face to see if you're paying attention to him. when you keep watching the movie, he’ll get whiny, dropping his head heavily onto your lap, sliding his hands under your shirt to grip your waist, and muttering, "this movie is mid anyway, look at me instead."*
thanos is the type of guy to take a dangerous mix of downers just to stop his chest from tightning before a meeting, get completely loopy and manic mid-conversation, and then genuinely wonder why people look at him like he’s a ticking time bomb.
thanos is the type of guy to post a super deep, black-and-white selfie with a caption about how "the fake friends reveal themselves in the dark," and then immediately delete it two minutes later because his manager texted him saying it looks completely embarrassing.
thanos is the type of guy to do it casually when you’re standing at the stove or brushing your teeth, a heavy, solid smack as he walks by that makes a loud sound in the quiet apartment.
thanos is the type of guy to create a fake female fan account on tumblr just to write long paragraphs defending his music and his style, using words like "he's so misunderstood and genius" just to boost his own crushed ego when a track flops.
thanos is the type of guy to get a small bruise on his forearm from hitting it against a door frame, and walk around with a fake limp or a heavy arm wrap for a week just to get people to ask him what happened so he can look like he survived something crazy.
thanos is the type of guy to act super distant and passive-aggressive after someone flirts with you, giving you short, one-word answers and refusing to look you in the eye. when you finally pull him by his hoodie sleeve and demand to know what's wrong, he’ll try to play it cool by saying, "nothing, i don't care," before his voice cracks completely and he whimpers, "he won best new artist of the year at the Seoul Music Awards, you probably think i'm an idiot compared to him."
thanos is the type of guy to constantly talk shit about cats, loudly bragging to anyone who will listen that dogs are the only real, manly pets and that cats are just sneaky, useless little demons. but then he goes over to nam-gyu's apartment, sits on the couch to complain about his life, and nam-gyu's cat casually strolls over, climbs right onto his lap, and circles around before plop-ing down to take a nap.
thanos is the type of guy to instantly freeze like a statue when the cat touches him, his eyes going wide with panic as he waves his painted fingernails in the air, whispering aggressively in a mix of english and korean, "yo, nam-su, get this shit off of me right now, bro, it’s getting hair on my pants, i swear to god get it off."
thanos is the type of guy to pretend to be totally annoyed for the next hour, sitting completely stiff so he doesn't disturb the cat, but slowly, unconsciously letting his hand drop until he’s gently petting behind its ears totally mesmerized by the vibrating purr against his thighs.
thanos is the type of guy to come bursting through your apartment door later that night, his hair totally messy, grabbing you by the waist and dragging you over to his laptop to show you fifty different adoption pages for local shelters, whining in that high, desperate voice, "baby, look at this orange one, we need to go get him tomorrow, he looks so sad, please say yes, i’m literally gonna die if we don't get a cat right now."
thanos is the type of guy to spot a group of middle schoolers hanging out near a convenience store, walk up to them with his sunglasses on like he’s a massive celebrity, and casually drop the most unhinged, explicit english and korean curse words into a conversation just to hear them gasp, smirking and whispering, "don't tell your moms i taught you that, it's a secret track verse.
TRIGGER WARNING/CONTAINS: 18+ content!,smut!, NSFW, female reader, arguing, angst, a bit toxic, implied self-doubt and dislike
I wrote this all in one day lmao, I dunno I was just bored and stuff…also I wrote this with like 1 hour or less of sleep so if it’s garbage that’s ok (●’◡’●)
You and Thanos were in the middle of a fight, you felt as though he didn’t care for you. You expected him to be this way-after all he was a playboy and you felt embarrassed you ever considered he would be different with you. You thought he thought you were special, the way he sneaked glances, the way he blushed when you were around, joked and flirted with you…you really thought he valued you more but then you saw him flirting with other girls and everything you believed shattered and so did your heart. As days passed, he distanced himself from you and completely dumped you, not like you had anything much to begin with, but you’ve known him for months now and it felt like you had something real. But there he was, acting like you hadn’t existed in the first place. You remember all you’ve shared with each other and the days you hung out that felt like dates. No you couldn’t take it anymore. You didn’t want him to just..forget you..you wanted to make it clear that you were worth it.
You went to the pentagon club and confronted him in front of his friends which may have been a mistake because he was too proud to say anything that meant shit. He just laughed at you and told you that “It’s life señorita, sure, you were special for a day or two but I was getting bored! You thought I liked you? Pfft-“
Those words rung out in your head ever since and your entire life lost the meaning it had when you made him laugh, when you made him smile and when he would kiss you.
After thinking about it for weeks you decided to finally let go, to forget about him, but the only way you’d be okay with that is if you’d sort things out with him properly and you selfishly decided that a good way to end things off was if you made him pretend to like you for one last time. For one last good memory.
You went into his apartment, you both started arguing. You almost forgot about your idea of making him pretend to like you one last time.
Thanos looked at you with frustration, “What do you want ME to do, huh?”
You clenched your teeth, equally pissed and shouted something he didn’t expect you to say, it…just slipped out; “Look at me for once and tell me you like me. That you want me! I know you don’t feel the same for me but I want you…I need you! I know I’m crazy, I know it’s hopeless but just once, act like you care, just pretend, just pretend that you want me! Cause I can’t take it anymore! I just want to know how it feels to feel beautiful!” Tears pricked in the corner of your eyes. “Just this once..and I’ll leave you alone…”
Thanos was speechless. You wanted him to pretend to want you? You wanted…to feel beautiful? “I don’t want you to leave me alone.” His voice was softer, heart broken you believed he wasn’t interested in you but he didn’t know how to show it, he knew he was a jerk recently, going out of his way to avoid you and even being awful to you in front of his friends.
“You’re not bad at this acting thing.” You said, thinking he was playing along like you asked him to and before he could tell you that he wasn’t, you closed the distance. Your lips on his.
“Mmphf—!” He moaned involuntarily against your lips and kissed you back, since he felt you wanted this, in fact needed it in some way to prove to yourself that you can be loved.
He pinned you to the wall gently, his hands on your waist.
You cupped his cheeks and kissed him eagerly, he felt it, the natural dominance and it turned him the fuck on.
He moved his hands under your shirt, feeling your waist beneath his hands. “You feel good.” He murmured with a strained voice. He felt a bit embarrassed that he was getting turned on like this.
Involuntarily he pressed up into you as he kissed you back sloppily. He wanted to be close to you. And that’s when you felt it, the clear hardness against your thigh, a heat that confused you, you thought he was playing along but he was already this excited and you barely started.
He knew you felt it, he was mortified but made no move to move away and instead pressed closer as if the direct contact with you would make it easier to deal with his situation. Of course pressing closer just made him more desperate. “Ah—fuck” he groaned.
“Are you—?!” You pulled away from his lips which made him grunt in frustration.
“Fuck—yeah, a little.” He admitted, embarrassed, leaning in to kiss you again but you stopped him which made him shift around uncomfortably, he didn’t know what to do with himself, he was hard and vibrating with want.
“But—I thought you weren’t attracted to me..” you say.
“You crazy if you thought that.” He said and leaned in again but you stopped him once again.
“Fuck—woman, I wanna kiss you.” He groaned, dropping his head on your shoulder and panting involuntarily into your ear.
“Y-you do? For real?” You blushed, omg he was so horny…you never saw him like this…
“Yes!” He replied with a desperation that made your face burn.
He started sucking on your neck, impatiently, his cock pressed into you with a hardness and readiness that made you feel like this wasn’t just kissing for him.
“Dude-“ you can’t help but look at him with confusion and shock as his sloppy neck kissing tickles you…he’s getting harder from kissing your neck…did he really enjoy this THIS much?!
“Don’t call me dude, I’m your..” he pauses and looks at you shyly. “I’m your…good boy?” He looks embarrassed to say it but is too horny to not.
“What!?” You look at him with shock.
“Yeah…good boy…can I please be your good boy?” He dropped to his knees in front of you with zero hesitation.
You’re speechless.
“W-what?!”
“Please? Please can I?” He’s whimpering, his erection tenting his pants obscenely, on his knees, looking up at you.
“My good boy!?” You exclaim in shock.
He groans when he hears the words from you although he knows you’re not calling him that just exclaiming the fact he wanted you to.
“Sorry, señorita…I just… I know I’m being embarrassing but…I’ve never wanted to be anyone’s good boy before but…ah—fuck…the way you kissed me made me wanna be your anything. I just wanna be yours.” He looked mortified but didn’t want to stop.
“What!? Mine? MINE?! Excuse me with the way you acted a few weeks ago? With the way you just forgot about me?” You didn’t believe what he was saying.
“AH-Fucking hell—“ he shifted around on his knees, his pants felt too tight. He shakily rubbed your legs, gripping onto you, just to ground himself. “I know I was a jerk but- I just- I know I was awful…but just- the closer I got to you, the more I knew I’d never want anyone else and that scared me.” He admitted, his voice was strained, weak, as if he was both too horny to talk but also as if it was really hard for him to actually tell you this.
“I have an image to maintain. I need to be legend Thanos…but with you I just wanna be Su-bong.” He bit his lip, it was hard to tell if he was doing that to hold back a moan or if he was just nervous.
“I mean…come on…is the legend Thanos a good boy for his pretty girl? No…he’s a bad boy for everyone and no one.” He said, looking up at you as he shifted around uncomfortably once again with a grunt.
You were speechless, was he just acting like you asked him. “Are you acting?” You asked him carefully.
“Does it look like I am?” He gestures awkwardly to his crotch. “I’d never undermine myself like this, even when acting.” He admitted.
You crouched down to his level. “So it’s true…you wanna be…mine?” You asked, the relief you felt was overwhelming.
“Yes, señorita. Yours. All yours. Just own me.” He panted, crawling towards you, as he reached you, which he did quickly cause the distance was small he went in for a kiss.
You stopped him once again and he groaned in frustration. “Haaaahh- you can’t be serious…”
“Sorry- I Just…oh- um-“ he dropped his head on your lap. You ran your hand through his hair. It felt a bit awkward for you since you weren’t used to him being like this.
“I just wanted to um- ask…if you want me and I want you..can we be…a thing?” You asked awkwardly.
“We can try…I just…can’t have it affect my image.” He murmured against your thigh.
“Okay..” you smiled a bit.
“Can you kiss me already, woman? I’m so blue balled I feel like I’m gonna die.” He huffed.
You chuckled and nodded. He sat up and leaned in eagerly, sloppily kissing you as he groaned into your mouth.
You kissed him back, not as sloppy as he was, much more controlled. You slipped your tongue into his mouth and you felt him tense.
“Ahhhh-! Mmmpf—” His moan was a bit higher now.
You explored his mouth with your tongue, you could tell he was desperate, the kiss kept getting interrupted by his moans.
“Shit- sorry.” He grunted After realising how desperate he was being. It embarrassed him.
“I just….missed you.” He murmured against your lips.
“Me too.” You murmured back.
After kissing for a good while he broke the kiss to pant shakily. “Don’t hate me…but can I jerk off?” He asked, embarrassed as hell.
“No, I’ll do it.” You smirk and he looks absolutely down bad for the idea.
“Yes please, baby..” he smiled shyly, the idea turning him on so much.
“Stand up.” You smirk.
“On your knees for me, señorita? Damn..” he didn’t say it in a cocky manner that he usually did, instead it sounded like he was living the dream.
You chuckled and nodded.
He stood up shakily, leaning on the wall to stand up without his knees buckling. He felt weak. One hand was over his crotch so that he’d have better control standing up (and maybe so the damn thing won’t bounce around awkwardly as he made his way up).
You moved directly below him and you felt him exhale shakily. Oh gosh…he was nervous.
You placed your hand on his abs, feeling them twitch. You patted his stomach. “You’ve been working out?”
He nodded, he’d usually brag about it but, right now he just felt proud you noticed. “Yeah…kinda.”
“Such a pretty boy.” You smirk, moving your hand lower.
“Fucking hell woman…” he groaned. Writhing beneath your hand. “Ahhh—fuck-fuck.” He was down bad, absolutely screwed for you. He wanted you more than he wanted anything in his life. And your hand slowly moving down his stomach to his waistband had him gripping the wall behind him and whimpering like an idiot.
You gently removed his hand that was still covering his crotch and unzipped his pants. He exhaled, feeling slight relief. He had been suffering in his pants that have gotten tighter and tighter, stretching over his crotch obscenely but now he was free.
He glanced down and groaned in embarrassment at the fact the bulge in his boxers was so obvious. And a damp patch on the front that couldn’t be more awkward to address.
“Damn, you’re so desperate for it.” You murmured, lowering his boxers too now.
“Mmhmm.” He said, his voice strained.
“Be a good boy and hold still.” You said and he bit his lip. No way you just called him what he so desperately wanted to be.
“Yes. I’ll be good. I’m your AHHH- FUCKKK—! YES…oh yes—!” He was interrupted by your lips wrapping around him, and he was going insane already, trying his best not to buck up into you.
You sucked on his dick, being careful to not graze him with your teeth. His hand came up to hold onto your head, his hand in your hair.
“Haaaahhh—you’re amazing…oh fuck- holy shit—” he continued.
You could tell he was getting close. So you decided to push him to the edge by deep-throating him.
His eyes almost rolled back and he gripped both your hair, still trying to be gentle, and also gripped the wall behind him trying to keep upright.
“I-I’m close—fuck-FUCK—AH YES! Yes! Ahhhh..” he finished into your mouth.
He was drenched in sweat, panting hard as he struggled not to collapse. “You’re—you’re amazing, Y/N…I can’t—“ he panted.
His eyes widened as he glanced down to see you licking off the remains of his cum off his cock. “W-woah—you didn’t…have…to..” he looked away. He knew he was gonna have dreams about that now.
“I wanted to, my good boy.” You smirked, wiping your lips with the back of your hand. Then tucking him into his pants.
“G-good boy?” He whispered, terrified to let himself hear it. He didn’t wanna get turned on after coming so hard.
You just nodded and helped him sit down on the floor.
“So are we…official?” You murmured, looking at him as his chest heaved.
“I don’t think I got a better option.” He teased despite being absolutely wrecked. You nudged him and tried making an offended face but failed cause you couldn’t hold in your laugh.
“Ok, now leave. I’m done my acting now.” He said.
“What!? Acting?” You looked devastated.
He looked immediately worried that you believed him. “Hey no! No, no, no, no NO! I’m just kidding señorita. How could you believe that?” He looked a bit panicked as his hand wrapped around your wrist.
“Oh thank goodness…haha…geez..I dunno why I thought you were for real with that. It’s hard to act out moaning so raw.” You joked.
His face turned red. “Hey! I-…don’t ever mention that again.”
“‘*oh yes! Oh yes!*’” you mocked him.
His face turned even redder, his ears too. “D-don’t make fun of me!”
“Sorry.” You chuckled giving his cheek a kiss. He melted into it immediately.
You were glad that you didn’t have to leave. That the truth shattered the lies. Maybe if you hadn’t have come over he’d still be pretending he didn’t want you and you’d still be hung up on him. Coming to his apartment and confronting him was the best decision you made.
Heyy queen, could you write Thanos smut where it’s just him being a desperate submissive idiot <3
subby subongie
α/n: brooo this is the best thing i've ever delivered wtfff. i love love love love sub!thanos oh lawd i can't i'm gonna collapse dhuihpoidoguhucefhcdecdkcdd i need this i need that please. thank you wasppiss for giving me such α good time grrrrr
content: sub!thanos x dom!freader, sexual content, sexual language, cum, cuming multiple times, ruined orgasm, creampie, cowgirl position, handjob, pathetic!thanos, desperate!thanos, sloppy makeouts, cuddling, arguing, slapping, tw: mg coin mentioned
words: 4647
nobody would ever believe that the crazy purple-haired rapper who was always in the news was actually the most pathetic guy behind closed doors. you could barely believe it yourself when you two started dating. you had seen those leaked videos from club pentagon of him beating up that annoying YouTuber, and he looked dangerous. he was so much bigger and stronger than you; he could easily throw his weight around. but instead, thanos was completely desperate to get on his knees for you.
it started the moment you met. he was so needy for your attention that you thought he was just another ego-filled guy trying to love-bomb his way into your bed. but he was handsome, he had this weird charm, and you gave him a chance. that was when things got strange.
you started noticing how he listened to you like a trained puppy.
you were confused because you had judged a book by its cover, the way he wrapped his arms around your shoulders at club pentagon, showing you off like a prize made him seem very much in control…
one afternoon, you were sitting in your chair trying to read a post on your phone. subong was vibrating around the living room, pacing back and forth and ranting loudly about some stupid drama. he was totally wound up, waving his hands around.
without looking up from your screen, you reached out, grabbed his wrist, and pulled him down right in front of you. "su-bong. sit. shut up," you said, your voice quiet but firm.
you expected him to complain, roll his eyes, or make some loud joke. instead, he froze. his mouth snapped shut mid-word and his eyes went wide. he stayed right where you put him, dropping heavily onto his knees. he didn't even try to stand up. instead, he slowly rested his chin right on your knee, staring up at you with a dazed, completely blank look. he was totally silent, just waiting to see if you would tell him to do anything else.
then there was the time you decided to tease him a little. you were having a silly, playful argument, and you snatched his vape right out of his hand, holding it up high where he couldn't reach it. normally, a guy would laugh and wrestle you for it. but subong had a long, exhausting day. his defenses were totally down.
instead of fighting back, his shoulders slumped. he leaned forward and collapsed his weight against you, burying his face right into the crook of your neck. his hands clutched at your clothes like a lifeline.
"please," he mumbled against your skin, his voice incredibly soft and pathetic.
he froze the second the word left his mouth, realizing how desperate he sounded over something so small. his painted fingernails dug into your shirt. at first, you just thought he was really cranky without his nicotine, but it was much deeper than that.
in public, he was a totally different person. he would walk with his chest puffed out, looking tough and manly. if someone he didn't like walked by, his jaw would clench, his eyebrows would furrow, and his eyes would get that sharp, scary look. nobody looking at him then would ever guess what he was like with you.
it made you want to test his limits.
one night while he was sitting on the floor by your legs, you reached down and tangled your fingers deep into his messy purple hair. you didn't tug hard, but you gripped it tight enough to tilt his head back, forcing him to look up at you and bare his neck.
su-bong let out a sharp, shaky gasp. his hands flew to your knees, his colorful nails digging into your jeans because his legs had suddenly gone completely weak. his chest heaved, his mouth slightly open as he stared up at you, completely ruined by the simple touch.
he tried to play it cool, stammering out a weak, "y-you think you can just handle me like this?"
you leaned down close to his face, your breath brushing his ear. "you're trembling, subongie. who's handling who?"
that completely broke him. he let out a tiny, whimpering noise and let his head drop heavily against your lap, giving up all control.
"fine. okay," he mumbled into your thighs, his voice muffled and desperate. "just... don't let go."
you had to admit to yourself that you loved it. you loved the way his eyes got so big and soft when he looked at you from the floor. you loved how, when you cuddled, he would wrap his arms tightly around your waist and press his ear to your chest, whining like a sad puppy the second you tried to move.
you didn't fully understand why he was like this until you started paying closer attention to the random stories he told you about his life. slowly, the pieces clicked. subong was running on a deep, desperate need for approval. he wanted someone to tell him he was doing a good job, to make them proud. when you took charge, it quieted the chaotic noise in his head. he wanted to be told exactly what to do because he was terrified of making his own choices.
you saw the absolute peak of this desperation the night of the rap battleground finals.
he had made it all the way to the end, the spotlight hot on his face. but the pressure was too much. he choked on stage, forgot his lyrics, and lost the first-place trophy.
when he stumbled backstage, he looked like he was about to fall apart. his cool-guy mask was completely gone. the moment he saw you waiting in his dressing room, his eyes welled up with tears.
you didn't say a word. you just stepped forward, wrapped your arms around his neck, and pulled him into a tight hug. subong practically fell into you, his head burying into your shoulder as he let out a shaky sob. his hands gripped the back of your jacket so hard his knuckles turned white.
"i'm sorry," he choked out, his voice cracking. "i ruined it. i messed up."
"shh," you whispered, rubbing the back of his neck. "it's okay. i've got you."
you took him back to his apartment, and the second the door clicked shut, his desperate side came out in full force. he didn't want to be left alone for even a second. he followed you to the bed, immediately dropping to his knees on the mattress and crawling over to you.
"please don't be disappointed," he begged, his messy purple hair falling into his eyes as he looked up at you.
he was so terrified of his own failure, so exhausted from choking under pressure, that surrendering to you was the only thing that made him feel safe. he didn't want to lead. he didn't trust himself.
you sat back against the headboard and patted your lap. "come here."
he scrambled forward instantly, laying his head down on your thighs and letting you stroke his hair. he was completely quiet now, his breathing finally slowing down as he clung to your waist, totally submissive, totally pathetic, and entirely yours.
would it be unethical to admit that seeing him in a state like this turned you on?
his loss at the rap battleground had changed him. the embarrassment was so immense that he had even built a giant shield with you. he did not want anyone to see him in such a vulnerable state ever again, and you absolutely hated it. it was not him anymore. he was trying so hard to cover up his hurt by pretending to be someone else.
even at home, he was acting so controlling. you noticed him being bossy and demanding every single day. he would walk into the apartment, kick his shoes off, and not even say hello.
"go get me a drink, and make it quick," he would mutter, throwing his jacket onto the couch.
if you were cooking, he would lean over your shoulder and criticize how you did it. "you are doing it wrong. do it like this."
when you tried to sit next to him, he would move away or tell you what to do. "go turn the light off. get my laptop. do not touch my phone." he was trying so hard to act like the dominant, tough guy just to make himself feel powerful again, and it was driving you crazy.
one day, you finally got completely fed up. he was standing in the bed room, barking another order at you in that fake, tough voice. you had had enough. you stepped right up to him, grabbed his wrist tight, and looked him dead in the eyes. you screamed at him, your voice shaking with anger. “i'm so fucking tired of this,” you snapped, glaring at him. “one minute you're normal, and the next you decide you have to act all dominant. what, because you're hurting inside? because you're too much of a pathetic little shit to deal with your own feelings?”
he opened his mouth to argue.
“no,” you cut him off. “don't. i'm done pretending this is confidence or some personality change. it's not. it's just you lashing out because you're miserable, and i'm sick of being the person you take it out on.”
his eyes went wide. all his fake confidence vanished in a second, and he looked just like a sad, scared little puppy. you could see the shock in his face, and you decided right then that you were going to make him pay for how he had been treating you.
you pushed him back hard. he fell onto the bed, and you scrambled right on top of him, pinning him down under your weight.
"who the fuck do you think you are?" you said, staring down at his face.
he did not answer you. he just stared at you, his chest heaving. you got madder, cupping his chin aggressively with your hand to force him to look right at you. "answer."
he got irritated, his brow furrowing as his ego tried to fight back. "i do not know what the fuck you want me to be!"
so you slapped him.
the sharp crack of the slap echoed in the quiet bedroom. subong was completely flabbergasted. his cheek burned, and it hurt, but you could see it in his eyes—it hurt so good. it shocked his system and made him melt. he tried to get up, trying to push you off, but you locked your legs tight around his waist. he was so much stronger than you and could have flipped you over in a heartbeat, but he did not do it. he just stayed there, trapped under you.
"since when do you talk to me like that?" you asked, your voice dark and mad.
"okay, sorry..." he whispered, his voice barely a breath.
you smiled, the power feeling incredibly good. "tell me subongie, what would your friends think if they saw you like this, hum?" you asked, slowly running your fingers down his clothed torso, feeling his heart beating like a trapped bird.
his breath hitched at your touch.
"what would that guy think, wait, what was his name? mg coin."
his eyes widened so big at that statement. the thought of his enemy knowing he was lying helpless under his girl was terrifying to him.
"would you want him to see how much of a good boy you are?"
he shook his head fast, his face red. and right then, you started feeling his erection growing rapidly underneath your thighs, pressing hard against his clothes.
"then do as i say, ok? wouldn't want your fangirls to know you get dominated."
you ran your hand down over his clothed erection, and his dick gave a violent twitch under your palm. you got off him and sat next to him on the mattress while he was still lying down, his eyes completely glued to you, totally frozen.
you reached for his sweatpants and untied the strings before pulling them down. it revealed his dark gray underwear, and you could see a barely visible wet spot right in the front, meaning his arousal had already started leaking through. slowly, deliberately, you hooked your fingers into the elastic of his waistband and slid it down, freeing his hot, already-slick length into the open air.
subong let out a soft, involuntary whimper as the cool air of the room hit his sensitive skin, his hips giving a tiny, instinctive twitch upward.
you leaned down, your lips brushing the shell of his ear, your voice a low, teasing purr. "let me hear more of that, pretty boy."
he swallowed hard, his dark eyes wide and fixed on yours, his throat bobbing as he tried to blink back the haze of heat taking over his mind.
"everyone gets to hear your voice thanks to your music," you murmured, wrapping your warm fingers firmly around his throbbing length, "but i prefer your moans."
the moment your palm closed around him, his head fell back against the pillows. a fractured, high-pitched gasp tore from his throat—a sound he would never, ever let his fans hear, reserved entirely for you. he was incredibly sensitive, his body vibrating with tension as you began to slide your hand up and down.
you knew exactly how to touch him. you kept the friction tight and the pace relentless, watching the tough-guy facade completely melt away. subong’s fingers tangled desperately in the bedsheets, his abdominal muscles locking up, turning hard as stone beneath his shirt as you drove him higher and higher.
"p-please," he choked out, his voice cracking. he was holding his breath, his hips lifting off the mattress in a silent, desperate plea for you to keep going.
you could feel the rapid, frantic pulsing at the base of his length. he was right on the precipice, entirely locked into the inevitability of the release. he was going to cum, and there was absolutely nothing he could do to stop it.
"fuck—" he groaned, a sound that sent a heartbeat right to your pussy.
you smiled, met his blown-out eyes, and pulled your hand completely away.
subong’s eyes went wide in pure shock. "no, wait—"
but it was too late. his body had already crossed the line.
deprived of your warmth and the vital friction, his climax stalled out instantly, turning into a hollow, frustrating ghost of a release. his lower stomach and hips twitched and his cock jumped in helpless, automatic spasms, trying to chase a sensation that was no longer there. instead of a powerful, satisfying rush, he was forced to lie there, trembling and completely undone, watching as his length began to spill and leak without any control. his cum just flowed out of him heavily, dripping like a slow, warm waterfall that he could not stop. it spilled over the tip, thick and white, running down his shaking skin and soaking into his clothes while his body kept twitching from the empty contractions.
"ah... no, please... why..." he moaned, a high, broken sound of pure frustration escaping his lips as he squirmed.
the heavy, white-hot drops fell onto the hem of his shirt, the dark fabric slowly soaking up the wetness of a release he could not even feel. every time his body gave another weak, involuntary twitch, more of his ruined cum spilled onto himself.
"look at you," you whispered softly, tracing a finger down his tense, shivering jaw. "so pretty when you're ruined."
subong could only stare down at his stained shirt, his chest heaving as a hot, embarrassed flush crept up his neck, utterly defeated and entirely yours.
subong stared down at the damp, dark patch spreading across his shirt, his chest rising and falling in shallow, uneven pants. the physical reality of what had just happened was sinking in, and his ego was desperately trying to claw its way back to the surface.
he glared up at you, his jaw clenching as he tried to summon his usual backstage attitude.
"you're a bitch," he muttered, his deep voice carrying a rough, defensive edge. he made a move to sit up, his muscles tensing as if he were going to pull his clothes back up and walk away. "that wasn't funny. let me up."
but his body betrayed him. the moment he tried to shift, his lower abdomen twitched, and a sharp, oversensitive jolt shot straight through him, making him hiss and instantly freeze.
you didn't even have to use force. you simply rested two fingers against his collarbone, pressing him lightly back into the pillows. he went down instantly, his strength entirely sapped by the ruined release.
"going somewhere, subong?" you asked softly, leaning over him so your shadow completely draped his face.
his eyes darted to yours, his defensive glare instantly faltering.
"look at you," you murmured, your gaze drifting down his body.
he was a complete, sticky mess. deprived of the friction to keep him hard, his length had softened incredibly fast, shrinking down into a sensitive, weeping semi-erection. it lay heavy and useless against his thigh, completely drenched in his own fluid, still slowly leaking wet drops onto his skin and the hem of his ruined shirt. he was literally glued to himself, completely unable to hide the evidence of his defeat.
"you can't even stand up right now," you whispered, running a teasing hand down his side, making him shiver violently. "your body is trembling, you’re dripping all over yourself, and you’re trying to raise your voice at me?"
subong’s face flushed a deep, burning crimson. he let out a quiet, defeated whimper, his gaze snapping away from yours to look at the ceiling, utterly mortified. he clamped his thighs together instinctively to hide the sticky mess, but the friction against his hypersensitive skin made him gasp and arch his back.
"don't move," you commanded, your voice quiet but leaving absolutely no room for argument. "you stay right there and look at what you did to your shirt. you don't get to act tough when you're this pathetic for me."
the fight completely left him. subong let out a shaky, trembling sigh, his shoulders slumping deep into the mattress. pinned by your fingers and completely ruined, the proud, untouchable rapper was completely gone—leaving only your breathless, sticky, and utterly obedient boy.
as you collapsed beside him, catching your breath, you looked over at subong. he was still staring at the ceiling, his cheeks flushed crimson, looking completely small and overwhelmed under the weight of his sticky, ruined state.
slowly, your dominant smirk softened into something warm and incredibly gentle.
"oh, baby," you cooed softly, brushing a stray lock of damp hair from his forehead. "did i tease you too much? i'm sorry."
subong’s breath hitched. he glanced at you, his dark eyes wide and vulnerable, trying to figure out if you were still playing with him. but when you pressed a soft, lingering kiss to his warm cheek, his shoulders finally slumped, the last of his defensive tension evaporating.
"stay right here," you whispered.
you slipped out of bed for a moment, returning with a warm, damp cloth. subong watched you, his heart hammering against his ribs, but this time it wasn't out of panic.
slowly, you peeled the damp, ruined shirt off his chest, tossing it aside. you began to wipe him down, your touch incredibly tender. as the warm, wet fabric gently cleaned the sticky, drying fluid from his stomach and down his inner thighs, subong let out a shaky, trembling sigh. every brush of the cloth against his hypersensitive skin made him give a tiny, involuntary twitch, but you held him gently, whispering sweet, quiet praises.
"you did so well for me," you murmured, carefully cleaning his sensitive, semi-soft length until he was completely fresh and warm. "such a good boy."
by the time you finished, he was looking up at you with pure, liquid adoration. you crawled back under the covers and pulled him into your arms. subong immediately buried his face in the crook of your neck, his arms wrapping tightly around your waist as if he were trying to crawl right inside your skin.
after the warm cloth had cleaned away the sticky mess, the air in the room felt quiet and safe. you tossed the cloth aside, slid under the heavy duvet, and immediately pulled subong against you.
he didn't hesitate. the tough-guy persona was entirely gone, replaced by a raw, quiet need for comfort. he buried his face in the crook of your neck, his arms wrapping tightly around your waist, pulling you so close there was barely any air between you. he let out a long, shaky sigh, his entire body finally relaxing against yours.
"i'm sorry, baby," you whispered, your fingers gently threading through his dark, damp hair, massaging his scalp. "i was teasing you so hard. you did so well for me."
subong squeezed his eyes shut, his voice coming out small, muffled against your skin. "that was the worst shit ever, don’t do it again. please.."
"i know," you murmured, kissing his temple, then the corner of his eye, dragging your lips softly down his cheekbone. "but you look so beautiful when you're completely undone. i love knowing i'm the only one who gets to see you like this. the only one who owns you."
a soft, shivering breath hitched in his chest. he pulled back just enough to look at you, his dark eyes vulnerable and liquid. "you do," he whispered, his thumb lightly tracing your hip. "i’m only like this for you. always, senorita."
you smiled, leaning in to press your lips to his.
the kiss started slow. it wasn't frantic or demanding; it was lazy, warm, and deep. your tongues slid together in a heavy, familiar rhythm, tasting sweet and quiet. you held his jaw in your hand, stroking his thumb over his cheekbone, whispering quiet praises between kisses, telling him how much you loved his voice, his touch, his patience.
for a long time, nothing happened physically. subong’s body was drained. his length lay semi-soft and quiet against your thigh, still hypersensitive and slightly aching from the aborted release.
but as the minutes stretched on, the safety of the cuddles and the slow, deep making out began to work on his nervous system.
it started as a dull, heavy warmth deep in his pelvis. the sluggish blood flow began to return, coaxed by the constant friction of your thighs tangled together and the heat of your skin. slowly—almost imperceptibly at first—he began to thicken.
he didn't just snap back to attention. it was a lazy, heavy expansion. he grew semi-hard, pressing a thick, blunt ache against your leg. he let out a soft groan into your mouth, his hips giving a tiny, involuntary twitch as his body remembered the sensation of being close to you.
"see?" you whispered against his lips, feeling the heavy growth. "your body always knows."
"it's because of you," he mumbled, his kisses growing hungrier, his hands sliding down to grip your ass, pulling your hips flush against his.
it took another ten minutes of slow, teasing grinding, deep kisses, and soft whispers before he was fully, throbbing hard again. but this time, it was a different kind of erection—thick, stubborn, and heavy with a desperate, lingering ache that had been building since his ruin.
he started undressing you, beginning by your silky tank top that instantly revealed your chest since you werent wearing a bra. you took off your silky matching shorts and tossed them on the floor, then took your panties off that were connected to your pussy for a few seconds by your wetness.
you shifted, splitting your knees and straddling his lap. subong’s hands instantly locked onto your hips, his knuckles white as he looked up at you, his dark eyes wide and pleading.
"please," he rasped, his voice rougher now, the heat returning to his face. "please don't play this time. just let me have you."
you smiled down at him, slow and cruel-sweet. "i'll let you have me. but you don't move."
you aligned him and slowly, agonizingly sank down. subong let out a loud, broken cry, his head slamming back into the pillows as you swallowed him whole. after the sensitivity of the ruin, the tight, wet warmth of you felt almost overwhelming. he wanted to thrust, his hips jerking up instinctively, but you pressed a hand flat against his chest, holding him down.
"ah-ah," you warned, starting a slow, rolling grind. "just lie there. let me take care of it."
subong whimpered, his eyes rolling shut as you rode him. he was burning up, forced to lie completely still under your weight while you controlled the pace. he watched you through half-lidded eyes, his chest heaving, a dark, heavy jealousy twisting in his gut. he could feel how close you were, watching your eyes flutter, hearing the high, sweet gasps leaving your throat as you built up speed.
he wanted to tear your hands off his chest, flip you over, and take control—he was aching to chase his own release—but he was bound by your command, forced to just be the foundation for your pleasure.
"subong... oh my god," you gasped, your muscles clamping incredibly tight around him as you hit your peak. your back arched, a loud, breathless cry escaping your lips as you came, the rhythmic contractions of your release squeezing him hard.
feeling you come on him, your walls hugging his sensitive length seeing the utter surrender on your face, nearly drove him out of his mind with jealousy and desire.
"please, baby, i'm gonna fucking die," he choked out, his voice cracking. "let me go. let me come inside you."
you looked down at his beautiful, tortured face, completely satisfied and filled with a lazy, post-climax warmth. you smiled softly, leaning down to press your lips to his.
"go ahead, pretty boy," you whispered against his mouth. "fill me up."
the mental barrier snapped. subong gripped your hips with sudden, fierce strength, driving himself up into you with heavy, frantic, desperate thrusts. the friction was blinding. within seconds, his body locked up completely, his abdominal muscles turning to iron.
he let out a loud, echoing cry—a raw, unedited sound of pure surrender—as he finally, finally got his release, coming in deep, powerful, throbbing waves inside you. it wasnt much because he had already came earlier, but it felt like absolute heaven.
when the last tremor passed, his hands slipped limply from your hips, falling heavily onto the mattress.
you slowly slid off and he noticed a white bead of cum about to slide out of you. he ran his middle finger on your lips to get them wet, before inserting his cum right back into your opening with his finger, checking to make sure none of his release slipped out.
subong didn't even have the energy to pull you close. the sheer physical toll of the roller coaster—going from a tense, unfulfilled ruin to a slow, heavy re-arousal, and finally a massive, mind-melting release—had completely drained his battery.
he let out one final, weak, contented sigh, his eyes shutting almost instantly. within seconds, his breathing went deep and even, his heavy arm draped limply over your waist as he fell into a deep, dead sleep, completely conquered and utterly at peace.
you sat down looking at him and studying his features. he looked so calm and innocent whenever he fell asleep, with none of that chaotic and loud persona anymore. he was just a vulnerable man sleeping quietly. you chuckled at how funny the world is, and how nobody will ever know this sweet version of him but you.
He is art, I love art @seungttttop - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
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