Out of all the bars...

Friendly neighborhood therapist, and by therapist, I mean bartender.

[shanesanderson]

cassandramaxwell·:

“So what happens if someone gives you a fake ID? –Mm, it must be the charm. The line didn’t really do it for me, but I could maybe see the charm angle. Plus you’re a bartender. Girls tend to have a thing for them.”

“I can’t sell them alcohol. Let me tell you, I’ve had some doozies. They don’t do the math of their birthdate and make themselves forty, and clearly they’re a teenager. Or they don’t remember their ‘birthday’ to repeat it to me. Such half assers. --So I have noticed. I seem to have gotten in the right career.”

[shanesanderson]

cassandramaxwell·:

“Does that line actually work on girls? Because that’s just sad.”

“Well, I like to keep my job and if I give a minor a drink, I’m done for. So, I toss it in with a compliment since I have to know, anyway. Sometimes it does work, though. Or maybe it’s just my charm that I add afterward.”

[shanesanderson]

“You don’t look old enough to be ordering a drink. I need to see some I.D. for proof.” 

[famousshirtlesscelebs]

[shanesanderson]

“Are you sure you want to do this, Ash?” He glanced over at the passenger seat of his truck. “I’d understand if you were too scared to handle a haunted house.” Honestly, Shane was the one who was a bit nervous about it. He could handle unruly patrons and dumb drunks, but he didn’t take too kindly to people jumping out at him, though he would never admit it. Not only was this one a haunted attraction, but it was one of those big ordeals that starts advertising in September. Can’t even let him enjoy the first little bit of fall without having those zombies on the television. Reluctantly, he pulled in the line leading to the parking lot, ignoring the guard who was dressed up like some zombie. Without looking directly at the guy, he nodded and half smiled, pulling into the parking spot he had been directed to. “Well, here we are...”

@ash--sanderson

[shanesanderson]

atticusfitzgerald·:

“–What can I getcha?” Atticus asked as he approached the newly occupied table, pulling out his notepad and pen before turning his blue eyes to his new customer. He hadn’t had much sleep in the last couple days since finding out he was going to be a dad, and Lucy had broken up with him, so he had dark bags under his eyes and hadn’t shaved in a few days– he was throwing himself into work to distract himself. “Would you like to hear our specials?” he managed to say before yawning. He shook his head and smiled apologetically. “Sorry.”

He looked over the menu and finally looked up at Atticus. “What would you recommend? I am starving and I feel like I could eat a horse.” Shane felt bad for the guy; he knew only a little bit of the situation, but it was enough to feel bad for all of the ones involved. “Looks like you need to take a day off, man.”

[shanesanderson]

dianahamilton·:

“I don’t know why I download these dating apps anymore. I’ve already gone out with most of my matches, have known most of them since I was in diapers, or was taught by them in middle school and high school. It would be way too fucking weird to suck my high school history teacher’s d.ick, y’know? He was hot, but I have memories of him talking about the Civil War and I feel like I’d look up at him and think about that and it would get awkward.” Diana looked up from her phone. “Anyway, that’s what’s going on in my life, besides being terrorized by my boss. What’s new with you?” she asked as she sucked down the rest of her drink and signaled to a waiter for another. “Did I just make things weird because I talked about my high school teacher’s penis?”

Shane couldn’t help but snort at her. “I’m sure you’d make his day and even year if you sucked his dick. He is a history teacher, after all.” He took a sip of his whiskey. It was weird to not be the one getting the drinks, but even bartenders needed a day off. “It sounds like you have a very busy life, Miss Hamilton.” He couldn’t help but chuckle.

[shanesanderson]

text message | darcy & shane

darcy: soap operas are not supposed to come to life. they're supposed to be afternoon entertainment.

darcy: you've got a point.

darcy: i'm hoping it'll make things a little... easier.

shane: everything comes from life. sometimes it's a bit dramatized, but people put what they know into their writing, also. and trust me, being a bartender, i can attest that your story isn't even in the top 10 of craziest shit i have heard.

shane: i hope it does, too. but at least you told him, so you don't have that stress on you or the baby.

[shanesanderson]

text message | darcy & shane

darcy: not still.

darcy: or my cousin will be my baby's step mom. that's right out of a soap opera.

darcy: i know.

darcy: i'm a fucking idiot.

shane: sure. not still.

shane: well, soap operas get their inspiration from somewhere.

shane: no, it's very... um, considerate. and true. it is congrats to him.

[shanesanderson]

text message | darcy & shane

darcy: he and i liked each other a long time ago, hence the baby.

darcy: he likes my cousin now and she likes him very much.

darcy: far from a celebration.

darcy: i made him a pie like an idiot. it said congrats in whipped cream.

shane: and still.

shane: i noticed. that's quite a pickle to be in. but i'm sure things will work out, one way or another.

shane: ...

shane: well... that's... one way to do it...

[shanesanderson]

text message | darcy & shane

darcy: how did you know?

darcy: did the incident at the restaurant not make it painfully obvious?

darcy: exactly the way i anticipated.

shane: just a little bit.

shane: i knew you two liked each other from the moment i saw you two in the same room.

shane: i just put one and one together.

shane: i'm guessing it didn't end in a celebration.

[shanesanderson]

text message | darcy & shane

darcy: do i dare ask you to try?

darcy: oh, yeah.

darcy: so the whole pregnant thing

darcy: well, of course, you know that.

darcy: but i ended up telling the father.

darcy: and it's complicated.

shane: atticus? i'm guessing.

shane: how'd it go?

[shanesanderson]

text message | darcy & shane

darcy: you make it sound so dirty, lmfao.

darcy: i couldn't sleep, i figured you'd be up.

shane: it's a gift. i can make just about anything sound dirty.

shane: even your couldn't sleep comment.

shane: but i have a feeling something is weighing on your mind.

shane: what's on your mind?

[shanesanderson]

text message | darcy & shane

darcy: i just saw a dog meme and i had to share it with someone.

darcy: [insert link here]

darcy: okay, that's not entirely why i was texting, but it thought you'd appreciate it

shane: i'm always up for a good meme.

shane: feel free to slide those into my dms whenever you want. :P

shane: what's the other reason(s)?

[shanesanderson]

text message | darcy & shane

darcy: you around?

shane: for you? always.

shane: what's up, beautiful?

[shanesanderson]

ash--sanderson‌:

Scrunching up her nose, Ashleigh looked at her brother and shook her head teasingly. “If so many people blew you off that I’m your last hope then that says more about you than it does me, brother.” She let out a giggle as she thought about how they should spend their day. “I don’t feel like a movie but.. we could go bowling?” She asked with a hopeful smile. “We haven’t done that in so long!” She exclaimed before pausing for a moment. “Just.. try not to flirt with every hot girl that we see? It’s weird.”

“Bowling? You just want to beat my butt hard tonight, don’t you? Can’t pick something I have a chance at winning.” Shane let out a dramatic sigh. “Okay, I guess I can handle one day of failure for you.” He stuck his tongue out and hopped up. “Hey, I can’t help that girls flirt with me and it’s rude to just ignore them,” he said with a smirk. “Come on, let’s go.”

[shanesanderson]

ash--sanderson‌:

Flicking through the channels, Ash was on the couch when she heard the lock of the door. “Shane? What are you doing home?” She questioned but hearing her brother’s suggestion, Ash gasped as she turned her attention from the tv to her brother. “What?!” She exclaimed with a shocked expression on her face. “You mean you actually have a night off? And a Friday, no less? What will they do without you?” She teased before letting out a chuckle. Sitting back, she crossed her legs and gave a smile, nodding. “That sounds great. It feels like ages since we’ve done anything together. But only if you’re sure. I’m almost certain there are more interesting people you’d rather spend your night off with than with your baby sister.” 

Shane crinkled his nose. “I already called everyone else, seems like they’re all busy, so you’re my last resort,” he teased. “What should we do? Actually, we can do whatever you want, I’m all yours for the night.” He missed spending time with her, but with his crazy work schedule and her being an adult now, he tried to give her space. Not act like a father type as much anymore, and just be whatever she needed him to be. Though he sometimes fought with figuring out just how much space she needed from him.