boy: *is literally 1 year younger than me* boy: *hits on me* me: thanks…… but…. no thanks…. i’m old enough to be your mother……..
trying on a metaphor
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boy: *is literally 1 year younger than me* boy: *hits on me* me: thanks…… but…. no thanks…. i’m old enough to be your mother……..
you know what i really want? a modern dudebro vampire. just a typical obnoxious straight boy in a neon tank top and cargo shorts who also happens to be a creature of the night.
“okay, dude, i’m only feeding on you ‘cause i’m starving and there aren’t any hot girls around. no homo.” “wait, you’re gonna suck my blood?” “no, i’m gonna drink your blood. i don’t suck, that’s gay. don’t make this weird, bro”
“ah, i see you’re staring pensively out the window, chad. ruminating on the curse of your newfound immortality?” “nah man, it’s just… i got, like, some flecks of blood on my adidas while i was feeding and they haven’t come out…”
“we do not drink… wine.” “okay but is beer cool? and can we still smoke weed?”
he joins a 24-hour gym because being undead and allergic to sunlight is no excuse for skipping leg day. tragic music swells as he looks over his “sun’s out guns out” tanks (he has seven of them). his coven is a fraternity. someone make this happen
IT Workers Share the Most Idiotic Things Non-Techies Have Told Them
Try not to fuck up your life this year
me: *catches myself being judgmental* me to me: i did not raise u this way
if teenagers are ever being mean to you just pull out any miscellaneous item you have on you at the moment and make up some bullshit term to scare them
teenagers: we are going to punch you me *pulling out spoon*: have you lot ever been Uncle Jimmied
teenagers: we are going to kick you me *pulling out an electric toothbrush*: have you all ever experienced a Norwegian Christmas…
teenagers: we are going to unlawfully take your money me *taking car keys out of my pocket*: say, have any of you ever had a Pacific Ocean Garbage Patch…….
teenagers: we are going to call you mean names me *taking Costco brand pair of socks out of my purse*: it’s been a while since i gave someone a Tropic Of Capricorn………….
teenagers: we’re violent just for the fun of it ! me *microwaving a hard-boiled egg*: you’re all about to get a Matthew Broderick Jr.
i think it’s funny how men use myths of female inadequacy to cover for their own shortcomings.
like how women are supposed to be horrible drivers, when four out of five serious or fatal crashes in new york are caused by male drivers and research shows that young men (18-24) have a tendency to take high risks, over-evaluate their driving skill and disrespect the rules.
or how “women are stupid”, especially with regards to the debate of the wage gap, where men often claim that women earn less because they are less capable, when there are more women studying in higher educations, women are less likely to drop out of higher educations and are more likely to end up with a better degree than men.
or how men claim that women talk too much, when research shows that men talk 65% of the time within the family and are more likely to talk in long monologues, whereas women more often offer commentary. Men also are more likely to interrupt; in fact, during a political debate, the former (female) minister of state in denmark was criticized in the media and made fun of for interrupting the current (male) minister of state too often - study found that he had interrupted her 28 times, whereas she only interrupted him 13 times.
or literally uncountable other scenarios. the truth is, male pride today is so inflated and builds on so many lies that it would be laughable - hadn’t it been for the fact that these things affect women’s lives every day. these jokes mean that white women earn 78 cents to a white man’s dollar. they mean that women can be ridiculed even for the things they haven’t done. they mean that women, as a gender, are assigned less worth even in the fields where they succeed. they mean that women, as a gender, are devalued and disrespected in every aspect of their professional and private lives.
13 Striking Portraits That Challenge Society’s Views of Sikh Men
1. Gurjeevan Singh Plahe
2. Magic Singh - Magician
3. Asa Singh - Highway Planner
4. Gurbir Singh - Polo Player
5. Chaz Singh Fliy - Creative Director
6. Ishtmeet Singh Phull - Student
7. Roop Singh - Sikh Storyteller
8. Darshan Singh Bhooi - Retired Businessman
9. Amanpreet Singh - Temple Volunteer
10. Hardeep Singh Kohli - Comedian, Writer, Presenter
Project by Amit & Naroop via Identities.Mic
Holy fucking gorgeous humans
Couple In Long Distance Relationship Connects By Creating Combo Pictures
concept: the worst is over. everything’s going to be okay now.
this is so wholesome
honestly i just want this to spread because i’m so sick of the heteronormative narrative of ‘lol hate my wife/gf so annoying stop talking’ like… if you don’t want to hear them talk don’t be with them that’s what a relationship is i don’t
Was bored at uni, then this happened.
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(x)
Oh my GOD
Pilot Leia by AdamHughes