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On Acting

*in acting class, a student walks in wearing headphones, and doesn’t take them off for the duration of the class*

Director to that student: “Why are you wearing your headphones during class?

Student: “Oh oops, I forgot, I just like keeping them in because it makes me feel more comfortable.”

Master to his scene partner: “I get it. Sometimes I wear a condom all day because it makes me feel nice and cozy.”

[recounted on Oct 5 2015; actual date lost in the annals]

There’s a new guy in my class who’s like 6’8”, which makes me feel small. So I think I’m going to kill him

Oct. 15, 2015

#rage against the machine

I did a world goddess day ritual once. It was in North Carolina, in the basement of a hair salon

Sep. 27, 2015

I had a nightmare that someone tried on all my favorite sweaters and ripped every single one.

Sep. 27, 2015

#urban decay

People realize at some point they're going to die, so they're like, better start unloading all my sadness now. That's what midlife crises are.

Sep. 24, 2015

#wisewords

At the gym, on the treadmill, when I get too tired I pretend I’m a wolf chasing a deer. And I start actually growling, and showing my teeth, and I get this huge adrenaline rush.

Sep. 18, 2015

#grrr #primal

So on my way to the audition a supermodel came up to me and started talking to me and then just gave me her phone number

Sep. 2, 2015

#confidenceisasuperpower #liesmentell

Is it wrong that I feel the government should give me a rebate on food because I’m bigger than the average person? It would make up for all the uncomfortable bus and plane seats I have to deal with

Sep. 1, 2015

When Satan fucks Sin? Hottest shit ever written in a classy book

Aug 28, 2015

#poet #paradiselost

A threesome isn't that much better than regular sex, it's just visual

Aug. 28, 2015

#TheGuy

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