shit my dad has said

yes, this blog was his idea

[shitmydadhassaid]

(in the tune of I'm not okay)

"well if you wanted honesty that's why I called you gay"

[shitmydadhassaid]

"can you guys please stop yelling about abortion?"

[shitmydadhassaid]

"don't take drugs from anyone, I'll just give them to you"

[shitmydadhassaid]

"we can't accept rides from the opps, even when they have cooler trucks than us"

[shitmydadhassaid]

"let's rotisserie chicken this mother fucker"

[shitmydadhassaid]

"I have 2 sons, 3 daughters and 1 they/them"

[shitmydadhassaid]

"whatever, Van Halen"

[shitmydadhassaid]

"There's no way the dick was THAT good he's still writing songs about it"

[shitmydadhassaid]

"I'm not a leftist, I'm a centerist. I just wanna smoke weed at my friends gay wedding while carrying a gun"

[shitmydadhassaid]

"fuck you Ethan...fucking asshole..."

[shitmydadhassaid]

"that burp I just did? Tell Tumblr about it"

[shitmydadhassaid]

(at the end of a vacation)

"Does anyone want these drugs? I don't really want to smuggle them through security again"

[shitmydadhassaid]

"I gotta fight this guy now? I'm so tired..."

[shitmydadhassaid]

"don't yell at your husband, he's a good man"

[shitmydadhassaid]

I never told y'all, this is my dad

The man behind the quotes

[shitmydadhassaid]

"I'm Dr. Dre, the OG. You're slim shady, annoying but bitches love you. That skinny mother fucker over there is Snoop Dogg because he be smoking weed everyday"

[shitmydadhassaid]

"if you watch jackass without me again you're grounded"