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If an orphan takes a selfie, it’s a family portrait

#showerthoughts #quote #irony

you knew you were getting bigger when the swivel chair started going down instead of up when you tried boosting it.

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In 1000 years there will be porn sites that categorize porn in centuries.

#showerthoughts #quote

“Cowboy” sounds really manly and cool, but the arguably more accurate “Horseboy” sounds really stupid

#showerthoughts #quote

Whomever compiled the first joke book literally wrote the oldest joke in the book unknowingly.

#showerthoughts #quote #irony

Porn addicted dudes probably saw more dicks then women.

#showerthoughts #quote

You don’t know how many times locking your car has been useful.

#showerthoughts #quote

Building IKEA furniture is Adult Legos but with more frustration and less reward

#showerthoughts #quote

You can do everything right to live a safe life, yet all it takes is someone else making a stupid choice that can put your life at risk.

#showerthoughts #quote

If smoking caused canker sores rather than cancer, no one would smoke

#showerthoughts #quote

People born in the year 2000 never have trouble remembering how old they are.

#showerthoughts #quote #irony

Teachers probably hate grading homework as much as we hate doing it.

#showerthoughts #quote #irony #whatisonmymind

It doesn’t matter how great of a career he makes for himself, Lawrence Fishburn will always be Morpheus first.

#showerthoughts #quote

we are artificially selecting 4 leaf clovers out of existence.

#showerthoughts #quote #irony

Drop a live lobster into boiling water, you’re a chef. Do the same thing to a live cat and you’re a monster.

#showerthoughts #quote #irony #whatisonmymind

If you look like your mom you are technically your dads type

#showerthoughts #quote

You don’t need a heater if you have a crappy enough pc

#showerthoughts #quote

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