Now downloading Despair

'Sup. You can just call me Anaki, that's what people know me as online. I'm the SHSL Pirate. I'll find an' download anything, for a price. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Status: Dead Relationship: Single Tracking: #shslpiracy, #shsl piracy -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- This blog is affiliated with Once Upon a Trial. Anaki's indie blog can be found at shslfacecards =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

[shsl-piracy]

Okay time to go play on my multimuse shslfacecards

It's been real, OUT. Good luck with OUT2 and all that.

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

Are you Sure you want to Restart the Computer? | Anaki | Endgame

They did it…Yuki…Ricardo…they all did it. They’d make it out…they’d…

She could barely even stand to look at Arisa when she turned, when she finally showed her true colors. The sheer hatred she felt couldn’t even be measured…as she stared at the execution, she wished for it to go slower….and slower…she wanted this girl to feel the pain she’d caused so many others. She didn’t care about the sob story, she didn’t care one fucking bit. What? So Anaki’s shitty past would justify this? No…no way.

The next thing she knew, however, Arisa was dead. The goose was speaking and….she was there. She was with her classmates again. For a few fleeting moments, she wondered if maybe she was right about her whole Matrix theory…maybe they could all come back…maybe—

………dead? Dead…?

Her eyes fell on Mia…Min-yun….Ricardo…Yuki….they’d all been dead this whole time…? She’d been dead this whole time…? She opened her mouth to speak, but found herself entirely speechless. She stared down at her trembling hands, feeling the sting of tears once again reach her eyes.

Even if she’d lived…she wouldn’t have gotten to have that movie marathon with her friends. Even if she lived…she wouldn’t get to show Ricardo V for Vendetta. Even if she lived, she wouldn’t have gotten to be challenged to eat a ghost pepper by Yuki. If she survived, she wouldn’t get to tell Min-yun’s band about everything. This was all pointless…this was all for absolutely nothing. She…she couldn’t give a damn about who she would have been in another life…she wanted her life. But even if she fought harder, even if she survived, she would never have that life again.

….if she survived…she still never would get to hug her mother again. She still would have never heard that soft, warm voice whisper how proud she was of her. She would never get to hear that laugh, smell the air of Kabukicho, feel the worn fabric of the couch and the soft blankets that they wrapped themselves up in to watch movies together….

For all she knew…her mother was dead too. And even if she was miraculously alive…she was alone. She was in a world of despair, and entirely alone.

There never was any hope to begin with. And now…she’d do it all again. And again….and again…maybe she’d be the one to orchestrate…maybe she already had been. She looked at Yuki again….and at Ricardo….two of the best friends she could have ever wished for in her life. She was going to forget…they were going to forget…and there would never be a chance to relive it. Tears freely streamed down her face now…she didn’t care who saw, not like any of them would remember it anyway. She wouldn’t even remember it now.

"…..you two….h-have good lives…whatever the hell happens…."

Her voice broke…she wasn’t sure if they heard her. Maybe she was muttering it to herself, who even knows anymore.

She slowly began walking toward the gate, her expression filled with sorrow. She could hear all of the old conversations she’d had with her friends here…the laughing, jokes, secrets…she remembered spilling her heart out to these people and trusting them…feeling like she belonged for once, feeling like she’d made a difference…

She didn’t want to forget. Her feet stopped carrying her, and the unbreakable Anaki fell to her knees.

"……..I don’t wanna forget….I….I don’t want t’ do this again."

She lowered her head into her hands, feeling as if this might be the last human moment she could ever experience.

"….mom….I….jus’ wanted to see you again….’s never gonna happen, is it…? You’re never gonna…see how good I did….’n…I’m never gonna….get t’ tell you that I love you. An’…..you’re never gonna…get t’ call me your hero….’r….Hiro…."

Her shuddering breaths came out and she gripped her fingers through her hair, letting out a heartwrenching sob at this thought. How many times had she gone through this? How many friends had she made that survived and moved on without her? How many times was she killed? How many people did she kill? How many times did she lost her goddamn mind? It didn’t matter anymore…nothing mattered. Maybe if she just remained kneeling here like this, she wouldn’t have to go to the next game. Maybe her memories would stay…maybe she’d wake up in her apartment and it would all be some horrible dream. 

But her legs betrayed her after a short while and, once she managed to wipe away her tears, they forced her to stand and walk toward the gate. She had no choice….she never had a fucking choice.

…..I love you, mom….’m sorry for whatever I did…an’ whatever I may do….

And with one final glance to her classmates, those who would reincarnate and those who would be forced into another game, her expression miserable and lost.

"…………bye guys….good luck……."

She said softly, before her feet carried her through the gate and away from this game….for now.

[shsl-piracy]

Friendly reminder, Anaki lives in the tower. So you will need the elevator or to ask Chiyo for a lift if you want to investigate her room.

[shsl-piracy]

Whoops I accidentally made a playlist.

[shsl-piracy]

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

"Body Reveal" - Wish Upon A Star

Victim[s]: Daichi Fujimoto, Anaki, and Kazuma Hanamo

Cause[s] of Death: Respiratory Failure [Daichi]; Strangulation [Anaki]; Blood Loss [Kazuma]

Time[s] of Death: 6:24PM [Anaki]; 7:04PM [Kazuma]; 7:32PM [Daichi]

Body Discovery: 5:38AM

Location of Body:

Pinned to the door of Sweet’s Bakery [Daichi]

His body is bruised and his belly cut open, blood and organs spilling out into his lap and the ground around him. His claymore is thrust into his chest, pinning the body to the door. There’s a little blood in his hair as well. Small paper stars sit in his hand and in his lap on top of the blood/organs.

Pinned to the side wall of Sweet’s Bakery [Anaki]

Anaki has been attached to the wall on the outside of the bakery. Knives are plunged through her hands, effectively crucifying her against the wall.

Hanging from a tree near Sweet’s Bakery [Kazuma]

Hanging from a tree in the plaza by Sweet’s Bakery by his rainbow scarf which is now tied into a makeshift noose. Below him a chair is kicked over. His body is covered in bruises and his back is covered in blood which seeped around to the sides and is dripping down to the ground. The front of his outfit is covered in grass stains. There are also small white paper stars in his mouth.

[shsl-piracy]

Well even though we're running out of time now before dead things happen

anyone want to thread with Anaki anyways? Figured I should probably ask o3o

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

Reading the History | Anaki | Motive Reaction

[superdupergungirl-blog]

Min-yun opts to just ignore the blood for the moment and try to finish up the conversation with Anaki before it gets any worse. Hopefully she won’t drop a finger (but of course, that doesn’t happen until she talks to Hikaru!), but it’s better safe than sorry. 

"Oh, I forgot you were a criminal! Ehe, hey, with the eye patch, you looked like an actual pirate! Not that it’s not great you have your eye back, of course, ehe, but that’s sort of silly!"

With another giggle, she scoops up the picture and the camera before hesitantly scooting over.

"Well, um, I mean, I should get going before I bleed all over the floor! I don’t even know how ghost blood works, but, yeah. I can’t really hug you, but, um, it was really great seeing you again!! And good luck with finding the person behind all this…"

She scratches her cheek before giving Anaki a sunny grin and bending her upper body in a semi-formal type bow. While her face is hidden, she takes the opportunity to scrub tears out of her eyes. Smooth.

[shsl-piracy]

"Hah, really? Even after all that shit about stealin' music when we first met?" She chuckled. "Hah, I'm glad t' be rid of the eye patch...but the thought of piracy did cross my mind when I first made the stupid thing."

She gave a nod to Min-yun's farewell, leaning back in her seat again and watching her give a bow. She almost said 'see you later' but, she reminded herself that Min-yun was dead, and seeing her again wasn't possible.

"You...keep doin' whatever you do, Mimi. We'll be here, an' damn right we're gonna find the one behind this."

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

Reading the History | Anaki | Motive Reaction

[superdupergungirl-blog]

I tried to think of a K-pop video that would work but failed.

Once the camera flashes and blinds her, Min-yun scoots back, pulling the picture from the front with one hand and covering her bleeding leg with the other. She seems to be determined to at least attempt to hide the cuts, even if it’s obvious what’s happening. 

"I haven’t used one of these cameras before. They’re so old! See, you have to shake the picture and everything…"

And shake she does, flapping the picture around and discretely wiping her hand on her pants. Darn. Does blood wash out? 

Once the picture’s developed, she squints at it carefully. Her expression if cryptic for a moment, obviously appraising the selfie worth, before she grins and holds it up to Anaki.

"Ah, look! It’s great! Your smile looks really shifty, though."

Shiftiness aside, she seems delighted by the selfie, carefully setting it aside.

[shsl-piracy]

This was just getting more and more fucked up...Anaki wondered if it hurt, going through all of this again. They were dead, so it shouldn't, but this place really did seem capable of just about anything. She watches Min-yun shake out the picture, and glances at it herself once it's developed, a small chuckle escaping her mouth.

"Shifty? I'm a criminal, a lotta stuff about me's 'shifty'."

She responded, shaking her head. Eh, it was a picture. Not much else to say about it, she didn't think she looked particularly bad or anything.

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

Reading the History | Anaki | Motive Reaction

[superdupergungirl-blog]

It’s a bird! It’s a plane! No, it’s Anaki’s eye.

"Yep, yep! Gotta be super duper close!! Only a few more…t-trials…"

Well, that’s an unpleasant thought. She frowns slightly before her face twists back into a bright grin. She skips over to Anaki, hopping up on her tiptoes so that she can fit her face into the picture. A peace sign next to her cheek, a silly grin, and-

"1, 2, 3, smile!"

She hopes the wince of pain as something slices across her other thigh doesn’t come through in the picture. That would put a damper on the moment.

[shsl-piracy]

Amazing. So many fun things flying around with this motive. What is this, a Pink Floyd video? She gives a nod in agreement to Min-yun's first statement...hopefully soon they could get out of here. Regardless, she rolls her eyes a bit once the girl sidles up beside her, opting to simply give a thumbs up and one of her usual smug grins.

"There, I smiled I guess. You good?"

She crossed her arms a bit and looked at Min-yun, trying not to be concerned about what was happening to her. She was already dead, what more could happen at this point?

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

Reading the History | Anaki | Motive Reaction

[superdupergungirl-blog]

Hey, at least her fingers haven’t started falling off yet. That’s a plus.

"Well, I mean, I’m still going to try to do more! Mhm! Ehe, the sooner the better, I think…it’s not like there’s a ton more places you could explore, right? So you have to be close…"

She taps her non-bruised cheek before bouncing up. Looks like someone has an idea.

"Oh, oh, I’ll be right back!!"

And off she goes, dashing out of the Archives. She should really just carry the camera with her, shouldn’t she? Another trip back to the dorm room and another bandaid later, and she’s back, the old camera swinging by her side.

"We should take a picture!"

[shsl-piracy]

Hey, at least Anaki hasn't seen her eye floating around or something. That would be weird.

"I mean...lookin' at the main map thing, looks like there's only a couple areas still locked up. Maybe soon we'll find somethin' big. We gotta be close..."

She raises an eyebrow and watches Min-yun rush off, returning with...a camera? She was never one to be in many pictures, but hell...not like she'd get many chances to take another one with Mimi, right? Might as well take advantage of this time.

"A picture...? Ah, well, alright, why the hell not. Go for it, Mimi."

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

Reading the History | Anaki | Motive Reaction

[superdupergungirl-blog]

Min-yun continues to nod. Ah, yes. Clues. She’s not smart enough for this.

"That sounds important! Um, g-good luck! With that, I mean. I’m sure it’ll end up with something!"

At least her thumb hasn’t fallen off yet, but she does wince, her back feeling like she’s jut bashed into something. Noticing Anaki’s expression, she waves her hands in what she hopes is a placating manner.

"Don’t worry! It’s just a scratch! Anyway, u-um…that sounds really smart! I’d help, but, um, we don’t really have anyone to talk to about things. Well, we do, but it’s confusing. A-Anyway! You can do it! 화이팅!"

She’s amazed at her own optimism. Looks like her new mindset is really working!

[shsl-piracy]

Anaki does her best to steel herself and avoid becoming too upset over what seems to be transpiring in front of her. She was already dead. Finding her body was enough. Watching it happen again wouldn't worsen the blow...

"Ey...gettin' my eye back and helpin' the others is plenty, Mimi...all I can do is keep workin' and see if I can get the others to work with me...thanks for the confidence though...'f my hunches are right...then we might be able to do somethin' soon..."

She sighed and ran a hand through her bangs, folding the paper back up and putting it away in a safe place.

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

Reading the History | Anaki | Motive Reaction

[superdupergungirl-blog]

Min-yun nods like she understands. Ah yes. A name. Fairy tales. All of it makes so much sense. 

"R-Right…! Well, you’re smart, you’ll probably figure it out, and then you can all leave!"

She laughs and gives Anaki a thumbs-up.

"Gosh, you’ve written a- ah!"

Min-yun is glad Anaki seems to be distracted by her writing as the same slicing feeling she’s felt moves onto her face. One hand goes to cover the thin cut, but it’s not enough to cover the bruise that accompanies it. Why does this have to happen when she’s finally afforded some happiness? Shakily she shoves her hair over so that it covers the majority of the bruise, wiping at the blood with her fingers. Maybe Anaki won’t notice.

"It’s fine! Um, what are you looking for? I m-mean, if you don’t want to tell me, that’s fine too." She smiles, flinching slightly as it pulls at the cut. "It’s horrible that people have to die. But if you all work together, no one else should h-have to, right?"

[shsl-piracy]

"Well, this doesn't tell me too much...just a small hunch that might be a better clue if someone looks into it, y'know? Found these [redacted]. So, I looked for a name I saw in there, an' found where it came from..."

Anaki looks at Mimi for a moment before giving a weary smile and a thumbs up. Last time she gave her a thumbs up, one of them died. Her smile fades and her brows lower as she notices the blood. Oh. Oh. That was how this would be, wasn't it? Of course they weren't going to just talk to the dead kids....they were going to watch them die all over again.

"I'm...hopin' no one else has to die. Not if I can fuckin' help it. That's why I'm doin' so much lookin' around and thinking...I just wanna go home, an' the more work I do to figure it out hopefully the better our chances'll be."

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

Reading the History | Anaki | Motive Reaction

[superdupergungirl-blog]

"Mne…meme?"

Min-yun frowns at the unfamiliar word before deciding to just give up the pronunciation on that one. One hand tugs at the bandage she has wrapped around her thigh- the bruise is still peeking over the top, but whatever. Hopefully she won’t run into anything else!

"Ah, fairy tales! Do you like fairy tales, Anaki-chan? Once I heard one about a mermaid…" Her expression sours at the mention of mermaids. "There are mermaids here too! Maybe we’re a fairy tale! Except the mermaids I heard about didn’t e-eat you."

She scrunches up her face in disgust. Stupid mermaids. 

"I’m sure you’ll get it, then!! If you all work together! A-And no one else kills anyone…um…well, anyway!"

"Y-You shouldn’t wish things that were impossible. I mean, someone was bound to do it a-anyway, so I just wanted to…make sure none of you were hurt."

She nods resolutely, obviously settled with the fact that she’d almost killed someone. Wow.

[shsl-piracy]

She shook her head a bit as she flipped through the book more, scanning the words quickly in the hopes of finding it.

"Not always a huge fan of fairy tales...mythology's cool an' all though. I'm lookin' for some information on a name, 's all...somethin' that could be a clue. An'....ah....I gotta theory about all these mermaids an' magic an' stuff too...yeah fuck mermaids...broke my hand once."

Then, she found it! The name she was looking for! She leaned in and read the story closely, going silent for a few minutes to read it all. She wasn't ignoring Mimi, but this was really important. Once she finished, she pulled a folded piece of paper with a lot of writing on it out and began jotting down some notes, being sure to note the book and page as well. What was this, high school?

"Sorry about that..found what I was lookin' for..." She finally pushed the book away and looked at Mimi. "I...really hope we do. Nothin' I want more than t' go home an' see my mom..." She paused. "I know you wanted t' keep everyone safe...just...damn, no one should've died at all..."

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

Reading the History | Anaki | Motive Reaction

[superdupergungirl-blog]

Min-yun stands quietly as Anaki moves around. Her stuff isn’t even here. That’s weird. She might have to ask about that, because her translation book had approximately 600 useful notes in it.

"Mm..mhm! We can’t do a lot, um…but, yes. We can send notes and items, and…other things, I guess? T-The pearls…don’t try and f-find them…" She bites at her thumbnail nervously, before gesturing to the door in the back. "The mirror. It can send messages between the living people and u-us…I think it has a name, but it’s just m-mean to me. It make my reflection make mean gestures…"

Yeah, rude.

"N-No one else should die…it’s…h-horrible and lonely…but I haven’t found any clues. I haven’t been exploring a l-lot…um, but if I find something, I’ll send it…!"

She blinks in confusion, biting at her thumb again.

"T-There wasn’t anything you could have done…"

[shsl-piracy]

"Ain't that...ah...Mneme or somethin'...?" She asked, pulling up a seat to look through the thick fairy tale books she'd pulled off of the shelves. What Mimi was saying only further solidified her opinion on what might have been going on here. She could be completely wrong, but...

"I see...glad to know I still got you at my back, Mimi." She glanced over to her again, offering a soft smile. "I'll do my best not t' let anyone else die...feel like we might be gettin' closer to figurin' it out, if other people are lookin' around still...I got some ideas, at least."

She sighed again. "Just cause there was nothin' I could have done doesn't mean I don't wish I'd tried."

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

Reading the History | Anaki | Motive Reaction

[superdupergungirl-blog]

Well, this is awkward! Min-yun should have known that Anaki wouldn’t want to talk to her. She only manages to make eye contact for a moment before she bites her lip, staring at her feet again. At least she tries to wipe her eyes discretely.

"Y-Yes, um… I’m back! I guess… hum… oh, the pearls. Y-Yeah, that was… I went and f-found them, it was… not fun. We can see everything like normal, b-but you can’t see us." She pauses, before blanching and waving her hands hurriedly. "N-Not that I eavesdrop!! I’m usually in h-here. By the m-mirror…"

It sounds stupid when she says it out loud. With a small wince, she goes back to staring at her feet, bowing her head.

"I-I’m glad you’re still…still…a-alive. I’ll go, I’m just not used to running into p-people in here. And I w-want to apologize for…what I t-tried…tried to do."

Finally she picks her head up, pushing up her glasses to scrub at her eyes, but managing a small smile.

[shsl-piracy]

It wasn't so much that Anaki didn't want to talk to Mimi as it was she had absolutely no idea what to even say. She pulled a couple of books off of the shelves and put them on a table nearby. Reading, yeah, that was great. But she had to check up on something.

She raised an eyebrow.

"Really? So...you an' the other...dead kids...c'n do shit like that to help the living...?" She paused for a moment, lifting the corner of her lip a bit. "An'...you can still see us, huh? That's...I believe ya. Mirror...? What mirror? An'..ah...if you're the one who gave me that pearl...thanks." Well, what else was she supposed to say?

She sighed a bit at the rest of Mimi's words, returning her gaze to the books for a minute. She still remembered what it was like to find Mimi's body....hell, too many people had died.

"I'm glad I'm alive too...don't plan on stoppin' anytime soon. I wanna get everyone else out...been thinkin' real hard on what clues we've got about whoever put us in here...no way this can keep goin' on. Any chance you've seen clues on...ah...your side?" She paused. "An'...I'm not mad at ya...jus' wish I could've stopped it, y'know?"

[onceuponatribulation-blog]

Reading the History | Anaki | Motive Reaction

[superdupergungirl-blog]

Apparently Min-yun was not the only one with the grand idea to go to the Archives. It’s not like she was actually going to do anything useful over there, really. It was just instinct. Reading is for nerds!! So it’s just her luck when she nearly literally runs right into Anaki. There’s a moment of horror- Anaki was one of the ones she was most afraid of talking to, after all. What if she murdered Min-yun! Again! That would suck! Still, crippling loneliness apparently makes even the most cowardly of individuals into something at least partly functioning.

"A-Anaki-chan! Hi! Um, it’s m-me…I mean, y-you probably remember me, sorry. It’s n-nice to see you again! It’s b-been a while! Oh, your eye is back! T-That’s great! I’m glad the pearl got to y-you! U-Um, how have you been? Wait, that’s probably a stupid question, uh…"

Well, no one ever said she was eloquent. She bites her tongue, staring up at Anaki with watery eyes before looking down at her feet. She’s so out of practice talking to people, it’s no wonder everyone’s going to hate her!

[shsl-piracy]

Anaki had been scanning the shelves, hoping to find something that could help her out with her hunch. One thing pirating so many files had done for her was helped her earn a really fast reading pace, so scanning through bookshelves wasn't a huge chore...well...outside of the huge number of books that were here.

She felt a sudden turn in her stomach as she heard that familiar voice call out to her. She paused and glanced over to Mimi in silence. She didn't believe this motive, but there she was, visible, speaking...but...she still wasn't entirely sure how. Well, she had an idea, but saying it out loud wouldn't really do much for their problem. Her expression didn't change, remaining rather neutral, but after a moment of recovering from the internal shock (that had scarcely shown on her face or in her body language), she responded in a casual tone.

"Mimi...damn, so the goose wasn't lyin'. I'm...ah....'s...nice to see ya too..."

She wasn't entirely sure what to say to her. Mimi was dead, after all, and having casual conversation isn't exactly an easy thing to do with someone whom you found the corpse of.

"Wait...what pearl thing? You knew 'bout that? Hah...how much d'you see from....where you are? I mean...I don't really get how this shit's...even happenin' right now. How that door can get your voices, how you can send letters an' shit..."

She was always a very grounded person. The idea of life after death was one that never really stuck to her much.

"I'm...hangin' in there 's best I can..."

Not like she could ask how Mimi was doing in return, right? She was dead, so clearly things were pretty shitty. She cast her eyes back to the bookshelf for a moment, quietly toying with her lip piercing. Well...this was an interesting development. Talking to Mimi again. Great.