Hearing Tommy constantly complain about his depression and the internet while he willfully makes himself miserable and puts no effort into changing makes me want to scream. Of course you think you hate streaming because you did it for years straight at the most developmental years of your life with your weird grown male friends. Then had one of your best friends die and had to come to terms with grief and death. Only to get slapped in the face by one of the closest people you shared this grief with-- someone who you highly looked up to so much you even shaped yourself in his image-- being revealed as an abuser.
That would make anyone run in 4 different directions but the thing is you cannot run forever. You will have to overcome challenges in life and it will be hard. You will lose friends you assumed would be there for the rest of time. Three months ago you couldn't have possibly thought this many things would be different but standing here now you're not sure you even recognize anything around you. That doesn't mean you should lose yourself to depression and paranoia, you have to put in effort to change YOURSELF to help yourself for the better.
Dragging yourself into the corner of a party away from your friends because you're scared something might happen doesn't do anything but leave your friends behind and isolate yourself further.
Tom throws himself into 9 different projects he starts but never finishes, shitty stand up stages, recycled bits from when he was 18, friendships with older men, trashy self-help books, or a new smp every 7 months. all in some attempt to chase a feeling that is long gone, a place where he can finally belong, a bountiful steady flowing stream of that feeling, a calm in his nervous system. Which leads him back in the same loop of constantly moving around but still being stuck in the exact same place you started. Switzerland from Brighton to NYC all the way back to his childhood room. The environment doesn't matter because no matter where he goes it will always be his reflection staring back.
Yes tommy you are the problem but im here to tell you: you don't need a profound kind of view to help you, you need Prozac and commitment.
stormborns
ellievsbear
discoholicmusic
kianamaiart
prguitarman
dailybridgerton
