sialenec and @cagcdbird? a match made in heaven
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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Love Begins
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Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

ellievsbear
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
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Misplaced Lens Cap
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YOU ARE THE REASON
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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@sialenec
sialenec and @cagcdbird? a match made in heaven
Oh, you’ve seen him, have you? The little boy from the house on the corner? An eerie wee slip, isn’t he? The rest of the family is perfectly nice; lovely mum, respectable father, a tow-headed firstborn. Then this one came along. Difficult birth, I heard. And Goodwife Florence says he came out caulborn too, like a sickly little ghost. I wouldn’t be surprised if that were true. Did you see the way he stares at things what aren’t there? He told my boy all this twaddle about seeing pale, floating slugs and crawling giant mushrooms on the rooftops and Oedon knows what else! Gave my wee Timothy nightmares for days! If you’ve got any small ones of your own, you’d best tell them to steer clear of the little mooncalf, you hear?
LAYER ONE: THE OUTSIDE.
name: Micolash Stojaković
eye color: Ashen grey
hair style/color: Wavy and kept slightly long / Warm black
height: 6′0″
clothing style: Posh and professional, yet comfortable.
best physical feature: Although some of it lies at the hands of his horrible self-care habits, Micolash has a very pronounced facial structure.
LAYER TWO: THE INSIDE.
fears: Failure, his life’s work being for naught, and ending up alone.
guilty pleasure: Micolash has quite the sweet tooth and will most likely sneak a scone or two with his morning cup of tea.
biggest pet peeve: He utterly despises people interrupting him.
ambitions for the future: To follow through with the Mensis Ritual and summon a Great One via the use of a one third cord.
LAYER THREE: THOUGHTS.
first thoughts upon waking up: What’s the point?
what you think about most: His studies, teaching, the Mensis Ritual, etc.
what you think about before bed: What he will have to do the following day.
what your best quality is: His intelligence.
WHAT’S BETTER?
single or group dates: Single; they allow for more time to get to know one another.
to be loved or respected: Respected.
beauty or brains: Brains.
dogs or cats: He doesn’t mind either; however, he leans more towards cats. They don’t mess up his study.
LAYER FIVE: DO YOU…
lie: More often than not.
believe in yourself: Heavens, no.
believe in love: Debatable.
want someone: Yes.
LAYER SIX: EVER BEEN…
been on stage: Though he may be extremely anti-social, Micolash has done plenty of speeches throughout his life. Not to mention he teaches on a daily basis as well.
done drugs: Yes.
changed who you were to fit in: Yes.
LAYER SEVEN: FAVORITES.
favorite color: Oxford blue.
favorite animal: Ravens - they’re a common sight throughout Yahar’gul.
favorite movie: N/A
favorite game: He’s down for playing card games of various kinds when not busy.
LAYER EIGHT: AGE.
day your next birthday will be: 18th of December. (He’s a winter baby)
how old will you be: ~39
age you lost your virginity: 18
does age matter: Beyond a certain point, yes.
LAYER NINE: IN A PERSON.
best personality: Intelligent and trustworthy, yet kind-hearted nonetheless.
best eye color: Doesn’t matter.
best hair color: ^
best thing to do with a partner: Talk or read over a cup of tea.
LAYER TEN: FINISH THE SENTENCE.
i love: Fleurette ( @cagcdbird uvu )
i feel: Nothing, yet everything.
i hide: My sins.
i miss: My mother.
i wish: I could amount to more in life.
TAGGED BY: @cerbinwen TAGGING: Whoever would like to!
Micolash has always taken his work very seriously; there is absolutely no room for faults or misunderstanding. However, though a practical genius he may be, everyone makes mistakes from time-to-time. In Micolash's case, he handles such things by punishing himself rather.. cruelly. He will run himself ragged until his blunders have been corrected, often going days without a lick of sleep. And food? He relies solely on coffee and tea the majority of the time, hence why he's underweight and malnourished.
In summary: Micolash is a Mess™ and could really use a hug
cagcdbird:
She was helpless to do anything but simply lay there and listen to the running water as he drew her bath. On more than one occasion the continued symptoms of her withdrawal had the little cleric woman screaming and bawling in sheer frustration——that her weakness, a weakness that took away even the strength to stand, could be cured by a simple transfusion had burned an ire in her quivering gut. But she could not be angry, not now; for Micolash dedicated himself tirelessly to her recovery. It will pass soon, moja láska. You will be better soon.
If nothing else, his unbridled love and devotion was enough to convince Sister Fleurette that it would be worth it in the end. Her chest weighted, she daren’t cry; Micolash need not know of how blessed, truly blessed, and how unworthy she felt of his love. The cleric had promised herself to the scholar, as the scholar had promised himself to the cleric—and so it was with a heart burdened with guilt, sweet Fleurette lay silent in her suffering.
When her husband returned and hoisted her frail little body into his grasp, Fleurette slung arms that felt like lead around his neck and settled her head against his shoulder. The albino woman smiled; though feeble and short-lived, she hoped it conveyed her gratitude. There was a weak huff of a chuckle, that she might at the very least inject some humour into all of their current tragedy.
❝S-Someone should pinch me, because I must be ‘aving one of those fever dreams again———the sweetest scholar man to call my own, and ‘e draws me a bath ? ? C’est incroyable.❞
No words were uttered as Micolash toted his wife to their shared washroom, for the sheer adoration that sizzled in his gaze conveyed all emotions felt. He loved her——he sincerely did. For better or worse, for richer of poorer, and (most relevantly) in sickness and in health, he would do whatever possible to bring a smile to her face.
Upon arrival, the scholar set Fleurette down in a chair situated by the bath and slouched over to meet her height. It was then that he began to take off her sweat-ridden nightgown, spindly digits gently grazing her supple, slightly swollen breasts and delicate frame all the while. As her beloved sight began to dwindle away yet again, Micolash took into consideration how important the sensation of touch was to the former cleric. Any a man would find how she traced the intricate structure of his hands or visage odd; however, the scholar found it rather soothing.
With the majority of her body free of clothing, Micolash soon rid Fleurette of her remaining undergarments and stifled a gasp at the sight that lay before him. Even when dreadfully ill, the petite woman was as gorgeous as ever. Such things begged the question: What did she see in a repulsive, near-skeletal man such as he?
“ By the gods, you're beautiful. ” Murmured Micolash, chilly fingers dancing about Fleur’s thigh and calf as a subtle smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “ Whatever did I do to deserve you.. ”
ok now it’s ready
cognitive assessment.
bold all that apply to your muse’s current mental state; italicise any that apply to your muse’s past mental state — repost don’t reblog !
alcoholism: or alcohol use disorder ( AUD ), is a broad term for any drinking of alcohol that results in mental or physical health problems.
amnesia: a deficit in memory caused by brain damage, disease, or psychological trauma.
anxiety: a mental health disorder characterized by feelings of worry, anxiety, or fear that are strong enough to interfere with one’s daily activities.
appetite loss: a reduced desire to eat.
binge eating: a psychological illness characterized by frequently eating excessive amounts of food, often when not hungry.
co-dependence: dysfunctional and maldaptive relationship reliant on another person’s dependence on the affected individual.
cynicism: an inclination to believe that people are motivated purely by self interest ( scepticism ), or to question whether something will happen or whether it is worthwhile ( pessimism ).
defensiveness: the tendency to be sensitive to comments and criticism and to deny them. to constantly protect oneself from criticism, exposure of one’s shortcomings, or other real or perceived threats to the go.
depersonalisation: a state in which one’s thoughts and feelings seem unreal or not belonging to oneself.
depression: a mental health disorder characterized by persistently depressed mood or loss of interest in activities, causing significant impairment in daily life.
derealisation: alteration in the perception or experience of the external world so that it seems unreal.
devaluation: defence mechanism used when a person attributes themselves, an object, or another person as completely flawed, worthless, or as having exaggerated negative qualities.
displacement: an unconscious defence mechanism whereby the mind substitutes either a new aim or a new object or goals felt in their original form to be dangerous or unacceptable.
dissociation: is any state of a wide array of experiences from mild detachment from immediate surroundings to more severe detachment from physical and emotional experiences, such as a disconnect from reality.
drug abuse: the extreme desire to obtain, and use, increasing amounts of one or more substances.
dysphoria: a state of unease, or generalized dissatisfaction with life.
emotional detachment: an inability to connect with others on an emotional level, as well as coping with anxiety by avoiding certain situations that trigger it; it is often described as “ emotional numbing ” or dissociation.
flashbacks: an involuntary recurrent memory, is a psychological phenomenon in which an individual has sudden, usually powerful, re-experiencing of a past experience or elements of said experience.
flat affect: a severe reduction in emotional expressiveness. they may not show the signs of normal emotion, perhaps may speak in a monotonous voice, have diminished facial expressions, and appear extremely apathetic.
guilt: a cognitive or emotional experience that occurs when a person believes or realises — accurately or not — that they have compromised their own standards of conduct or have violated a universal moral standard and bear significant responsibility for it.
hallucinations: an experience involving the apparent perception of something not present.
hyper-somnia: or excessive sleepiness, is a condition in which a person has trouble staying awake during the day.
hyper-vigilance: an enhanced state of sensory sensitivity accompanied by an exaggerated intensity of behaviours whose purpose is to detect activity.
hypochondria: ( also known as illness anxiety disorder ) is a condition in which a person is inordinately worried about having a serious illness.
idealisation: the action of regarding or representing something as perfect or better than reality.
insomnia: a sleep disorder where people have trouble sleeping. they may have difficulty falling asleep, or staying asleep as long as desired. insomnia is usually followed by daytime sleepiness, low energy, and a depressed mood.
intellectualisation: a defense mechanism by which reasoning is used to block confrontation with an unconscious conflict and its associated emotional stress — where thinking is used to avoid feeling. it involves removing one’s self, emotionally, from a stressful event.
introjection: regarded as the process where the subject replicates in themselves behaviours, attributes, or other fragments of the surrounding world, especially of other subjects. cognate concepts include identification, incorporation, and internalisation.
isolation: a defence mechanism in psychoanalytic theory characterised by individuals defending themselves from possible threats by mentally and physically isolating themselves. by minimising associative connections with other thoughts, the threatening cognition is remembered less often and is less likely to affect self-esteem or the self concept.
low self esteem: a person with low self esteem feels unworthy, incapable, and incompetent.
narcissism: is the pursuit of gratification from vanity or egotistic admiration of one’s own attributes. narcissistic personality disorder ( NPD ) is a personality disorder in which there is a long term pattern of abnormal behavior characterized by exaggerated feelings of self importance, an excessive need for admiration, and a lack of understanding of other’s feelings.
night terrors: also known as a sleep terror, is a sleep disorder, causing feelings of terror or dread, and typically occurs during the first hours of stage three to four rapid eye movement ( nrem ) sleep.
obsessive compulsion: obsessive-compulsive disorder ( ocd ) is a common, chronic, and long — lasting disorder in which a person has uncontrollable, reoccurring thoughts ( obsessions ) and behaviors ( compulsions ) that they feel the urge to repeat over and over.
panic attacks: a sudden overwhelming feeling of acute and debilitating anxiety.
passive aggression: a tendency to engage in indirect expression of hostility through acts such as subtle insults, sullen behavior, stubbornness, or a deliberate failure to accomplish a required task.
paranoia: the irrational and persistent feeling that people are “ out to get you. ” the three main types of paranoia include paranoid personality disorder, delusional disorder, and paranoid schizophrenia.
phobias: an extreme or irrational fear of or aversion to something.
projection: psychological projection is a defense mechanism people subconsciously employ in order to cope with difficult feelings or emotions. it involves projecting undesirable feelings or emotions onto someone else, rather than admitting to or dealing with the unwanted feelings.
psychosis: a severe mental disorder in which thought and emotions are so impaired that contact is lost with external reality.
rationalisation: a defence mechanism in which controversial behaviours or feelings are justified and explained in a seemingly rational or logical manner to avoid the true explanation, and are made consciously tolerable — or even admirable and superior — by plausible means.
regression: a psychological defence mechanism in which a person abandons age — appropriate coping strategies in favour of earlier, more childlike patterns of behaviour. this regression is a form of retreat, bringing back a time when the person feels safe and taken care of.
risky sex: risky sexual behaviour is commonly defined as behaviour that increases the probability of contracting sexually transmitted infections, diseases, becoming pregnant, or making a partner pregnant. drug use is associated with risky sexual behaviour.
somatisation: the manifestation of psychological distress by the presentation of bodily symptoms.
splitting: ( also called black — and — white thinking or all — or — nothing thinking ) is the failure in a person’s thinking to bring together the dichotomy of both positive and negative qualities of the self and others into a cohesive, realistic whole.
sublimation: is a mature type of defence mechanism, in which socially unacceptable impulses or idealisations are unconsciously transformed into socially acceptable actions or behaviour, possibly resulting in a long — term conversion of the initial impulse.
suicidal ideation: ( also known as suicidal thoughts ) is thinking about or an unusual preoccupation with suicide. the range of suicidal ideation varies from fleeting thoughts, to extensive thoughts, to detailed planning, roleplaying, and incomplete attempts.
sleepwalking: formally known as somnambulism, is a behavior disorder that originates during deep sleep and results in walking or performing other complex behaviors while asleep. it is more common in children than adults and is more likely to occur if a person is sleep deprived.
suppression: the act of stopping oneself from thinking or feeling something. it is generally assumed ineffective because even if you suppress or hold back an emotion, like anger, that feeling returns with a vengeance.
thousand yard stare: a phrase often used to describe the blank, unfocused gaze of soldiers who have become emotionally detached from the horrors around them. it is also sometimes used more generally to describe the look of dissociation among victims of other types of trauma.
triggers: something that sets of a memory tape or flashback transporting the person back to the event of their emotional trauma. triggers are very personal ; different things can trigger different people. the survivor may begin to avoid situations and stimuli that they think triggered the flashback.
trust issues: a person with these kinds of thoughts may construct social barriers as a defense mechanism to ensure that trust is not lost again. these barriers are often a person’s way of avoid the pain, rejection, or guilt associated with mistrust.
violence: the intentional use of physical force or power, threatened or actual, against oneself, another person, or against a group or community, which either results in or has a high likelihood of resulting in injury, death, psychological harm, underdevelopment, or deprivation.
temper: a reflection of irritation or rage, a propensity to be angered rapidly.
TAGGED BY: @rrakuyo Thanks, friend!
TAGGING: Whoever would like to!
cerbinwen:
The realization that she was indeed not invisible for the scholar let the woman make a step backwards where she bumped into the desk, papers fell to her feet. His expression and voice shocked her, made her unable to move or even retreat to her dream to find safety there – it was not fear she felt, no, fear was different. The situation surprised and confused her at the very same time and it took her a while before the priestess freed herself from her miserable state. He did not appear to her as dangerous, she thought and tilted her head to the side in curiosity instead. Humans were strange creatures, did not fear the unknown or a ghostly intruder like she was. They rather seemed to be euphoric about this incident.
“Yes.” The priestess nodded slowly before she pushed herself away from the wooden desk and headed towards the scholar. Her feet barely touched the floor almost as if she floated. “Is it yours?”, she asked him while pointing to the books and the papers which still remained on the floor. Even though she knew that the scholars researched the ancient secrets of Pthumeru, she was surprised that someone took interest in their gods – the Pthumerians had forgotten them in their own twisted way, the priestess had expected humans would do the same to them. Everyone forgot their origin when they progressed, yes.. Her voice was quiet, not used to the words and for sure she did not know many – only a few her scholar had taught her in case she had to talk to someone. In case someone could find her within this building. The accent alone made it clear that she was not one of them. “Are you a… scholar?” More words fell yet they belonged to her own language, she did not notice how she continued to talk in a tongue more comfortable for her.
As soon as she noticed it, the woman fell silent again and looked at him.
Even as his belongings spilled to the floor, the youth's gaze remained fixated on the ghostly woman that stood before him. Micolash felt odd for feeling and reacting the way he did, in a way; nevertheless, it was not unusual for someone of his frame of mind. Rather, it was natural.
“ Ah, yes! ” Snapping back to reality, the scholar leaned down to gather the various texts and epistles that littered the floor, his frail joints creaking as he did so. “ Since discovering the old labyrinths alongside my comrades, I have striven to know all that there is to be known regarding the Great Ones and Pthumerian society. ” Ashen hues peered at the work nestled within his palms with a sense of pride. However, the exuberant smile that graced his blanched features mere moments before faded to that of a scowl as Micolash continued on.
“ Oftentimes, it seems impossible, though; as if I’ll never amount to anything at this god-forsaken school. ”
❝Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there,
WONDERING, FEARING, DOUBTING,
dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before.❞
Ind. and selective Micolash, Host of the Nightmare
Penned by Katie
- ❛ one of the deep secrets of life is that all that is really worth the doing is what we do for others. ❜
Alice in Wonderland Starters || @sweetnull
One may expect someone such as Micolash, the founder and headmaster of a renowned institute of higher learning, to be in favor of other people. In reality, however, it was quite the opposite——he avoided any voluntary social interactions like the plague. Much to the dismay of those who cared for him, the scholar’s various psychiatric disorders and obsession with the Great Ones was driving him further and further into solitude.
“ Call me selfish, but I must say that that’s utter hogwash. ” Micolash’s brows knitted together in irritation as his gaze diverted to the floor that creaked beneath his feet. “ Such others are seldom grateful for what good deeds you do for them. More than likely, they’ll snatch the knife out of their last victim’s back and plunge it into your own. ”
❛ Well, I never heard it before, but it sounds uncommon nonsense. ❜
Alice in Wonderland Starters || @cerbinwen
“ Oh, joy——another dupe who believes me to be mad. ”
Though eyes were rolled in response to the woman’s remark, a tinge of sarcasm lingered within his tone that took precedence over that of obvious annoyance.
“ No matter; you’re not the first and certainly won’t be the last. ” He replied with a faint chuckle.
❛ It would be so nice if something made sense for a change. ❜
Alice in Wonderland Starters || @shareofwoes
“ Sometimes pondering the unknown makes life interesting. ”
Scraggly and pale were the fingers that nonchalantly thumbed through the grimy texts sprawled out before Micolash. Though the woman stood near, his ashen eyes did not once peer up at her as he continued to ramble on.
“ If everything was made clear to us, what would be the point of wonder? ”
❛ Why is a raven like a writing-desk? ❜
Alice in Wonderland Starters || @ofvcngeance
“ ‘Tis ironic that you don’t know the answers to the riddles you ask. ” Scoffed the scholar, his chapped lips curling into a derisive, lopsided grin all the while.
“ I haven’t the slightest idea, however, so I suppose we’re even. ”
➳ ALICE IN WONDERLAND BY LEWIS CARROLL; STARTER SENTENCES.
❛ It’s no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then. ❜
❛ We’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad. ❜
❛ Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast. ❜
❛ If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn’t. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn’t be. And what it wouldn’t be, it would. You see? ❜
❛ Who in the world am I? Ah, that’s the great puzzle. ❜
❛ I wonder if the snow loves the trees and fields, that it kisses them so gently? And then it covers them up snug, you know, with a white quilt; and perhaps it says, ‘Go to sleep, darlings, till the summer comes again.’ ❜
❛ Curiouser and curiouser! ❜
❛ One of the deep secrets of life is that all that is really worth the doing is what we do for others. ❜
❛ Why is a raven like a writing-desk? ❜
❛ If everybody minded their own business, the world would go around a great deal faster than it does. ❜
❛ No, no! The adventures first, explanations take such a dreadful time. ❜
❛ Imagination is the only weapon in the war against reality. ❜
❛ Everything is funny, if you can laugh at it. ❜
❛ I’m afraid I can’t explain myself, sir. Because I am not myself, you see? ❜
❛ My dear, here we must run as fast as we can, just to stay in place. And if you wish to go anywhere you must run twice as fast as that. ❜
❛ Off with their heads! ❜
❛ Well, I never heard it before, but it sounds uncommon nonsense. ❜
❛ No wise fish would go anywhere without a porpoise. ❜
❛ It would be so nice if something made sense for a change. ❜
❛ It’s always tea-time. ❜
❛ I don’t know the meaning of half those long words, and I don’t believe you do either! ❜
❛ Look after the senses and the sounds will look after themselves. ❜
❛ Rule Forty-two. All persons more than a mile high to leave the court. ❜
❛ You’re thinking about something, and it makes you forget to talk. ❜
❛ Birds of a feather flock together. ❜