a collection of emotions

[singalong-mockingbird]

Hungry

Where must I got to find my pride? I’ve turned every stone at every tide But I know it’s nowhere to be found It cannot exist on such soiled ground

Since I was young I wanted a reason To believe in my country And the unrighteousness of treason To understand a loyalty I do not have So why would I dare wave the flag?

What is it that I fight for? In a country founded from war Racism, fascism, everything between I don’t know what it all means

Where must I go to find my story? I know not where I come from Or where I am going It feels as if it’s been taken from me What kind of blood do I bleed?

It’s as if I am a ghost With no truth or honor to be my host Floating through heavy air Sins of the past aren’t mine to bear

I cannot say that this is my home A home is somewhere you don’t feel alone I do not trust this forsaken land With history washed by white men

So where do I go from here? I’m a shell with nothing to hold dear I do not know my ancestor’s stories I do not know of pain or glory

My culture is colonization Wiping out the other nations I am a branch from a twisted tree I cannot cling to my history

For heritage I’ll always pine But I cannot adopt what isn’t mine And I do not take pride in my country Shame will always leave me hungry

[singalong-mockingbird]

Into The Fire

If I could go back and change history, I’d go back to that moment. You know the one… When I was too scared To feel something real. Would you go back with me And do it right?

My biggest regret Was not leaning into the fire that night

[singalong-mockingbird]

Everything Other

We’re black and white souls trying to find color Winter and fall reaching for summer Give me pain and joy and everything other My heart is a depth waiting to be discovered

[singalong-mockingbird]

Creator

I am a writer. A deep lover. I can make any dream come true. I’m a time traveler. Undercover. But I cannot, and will not Fabricate anything more for you.

[singalong-mockingbird]

First and Last

As long as I’m your first good morning And last goodnight I don’t mind what happens in between And when your dreams are mourning And mine affright We’ll open our eyes to peace

[singalong-mockingbird]

You Don’t Listen to the Songs I Send You

You don’t listen to the songs I send you

How will you know me? Don’t you want to know me?

I just want you to feel what I do

How will you know me? Don’t you want to know me?

I listen to your voicemail

How will you know me? Don’t you want to know me?

It feels like I am reading braille

How will you know me? Don’t you want to know me?

[singalong-mockingbird]

The Last Sundown

Look at you in your cute sweater From now on I’ll wish for this weather When was the last time I saw you smile? I don’t know, but it’s been a while

Don’t be afraid to show your teeth I know they’re crooked, but that makes them sweet You accidentally cut your hair Don’t be embarrassed, it makes you rare

Growing up you never talked much You wouldn’t dare talk to your crush But since then you’ve become so proud Your voice to me is the prettiest sound

Don’t be afraid to show your teeth I know they’re crooked, but that makes them sweet You accidentally cut your hair But don’t be embarrassed, it makes you rare

I’ve loved you since, I love you now I’ll love you till the last sun down I’ve loved you since, I love you now I’ll love you till the last sun down

[singalong-mockingbird]

Blood, Bone, and Soul

i don’t want the words that fall sheepishly from your mouth like a leaky faucet unsure yet so consistent

give me instead your body your arms and chest embracing me in promise a shelter made of blood, bone, and soul

[singalong-mockingbird]

i hang on every syllable like his words are water and i haven’t drank in days

but alas, he was a mirage and i’ve been dying in this desert alone

[singalong-mockingbird]

i get so lost, god help me please find my way across deep seas simple bliss and gentle ease often fall away from me

[singalong-mockingbird]

Wayfarer’s Woeful War

On a whim, In the wind, A whisper - A whimper. Wallowing wasteland of Willowing will, Wilting still - Wandering… Words of wisdom, Wishing for – Wondering more – Why, who, and what. Wavering ways and Wasted days. To wake, wailing - Wayfarer’s woeful war.

[singalong-mockingbird]

Icicle

i am gracefully intense like an icicle

delicate and sensitive yet I always make my point - clear

cold to the touch but quickly melts by the warmth of your gentle hands

you might see through my diamond exterior but i will pierce you – when you least expect it

my glasslike love

[singalong-mockingbird]

Don’t Make Me Regret

why did i let you do that to me? how did i lose control? if i have to look at myself and see that broken look again, i’ll fold

oh, why do i try so hard? when you’re nowhere to be found? why do i let my pride get in the way of solid ground?

you can make me angry and you can make me tired but don’t you dare make me regret why i fought so hard for us- for us.

don’t make me regret fighting for us.

[singalong-mockingbird]

Who Are You?

“who are you?” the reflection begs. “we have same face, but yours is older. the same heart, but yours grown colder. the same blue eyes, but yours now redder. the same voice, but yours, fettered.

…you have lost yourself again.”

[singalong-mockingbird]

Not Goodbye

When I dream of you, I want to think about- Your laugh, The softness of your skin, How your love once healed my pain,

Not goodbye.

[singalong-mockingbird]

Prayer for Love

dear god don’t let me lose this love dear god send blessings from above dear god you’ve heard this prayer before dear god don’t let me suffer anymore

you know what i’ve been through you know my broken hearts i’ve never been one for begging though, but please don’t take this part- of me

dear god i’ve never fought so hard dear god i’ve never fell this far dear god if there’s one thing i ask dear god please let this one last

if there’s one thing that i ask please let this one last

[singalong-mockingbird]

Sleep Paralysis

I do not wish to wake to another morning without you The dread of dawn lingers like the touch of your skin My head cramps from empty dreaming To lie in between is to be paralyzed by loneliness