stumbled upon ur blog after finding an old post, glad ur doing well and congrats on ur baby girl :) i cant help but wonder ur thoughts on liam’s passing?
oh my gosh, hello! thank you so, so much 🤍 i know this response is very late, i only really come back to tumblr when i watch a new media and want to consume all the edits/drawings, so i missed this when it first came through.
liam’s passing was heartbreaking. i had just finished feeding my daughter when i looked at my phone and had several messages saying he’d died, with all the news articles having come out only ~45 minutes prior. it shocked me completely. i didn’t cry (thanks to the antidepressants i’m on after being diagnosed with postpartum anxiety), but i remember how overwhelming the sorrow was. i hadn’t kept up with any members of one direction outside of the songs i’d heard on the radio, although i was aware of liam’s struggles with sobriety as well as a few of the controversial statements he’d made over the past several years. although i didn’t keep up with them, i truly wanted him to have a redemption — if not for himself, then for his son.
i have a one direction mug that was gifted to me in 2012 that we still have in our cupboard, that we always jokingly use when we make people a coffee or tea when they visit. it’s from that one photoshoot that was used for every merchandise back in the day. it’s wild to me that now when my daughter asks about the mug and who one direction were, it isn’t going to end on a positive note of a full 5-man reunion. instead i’m going to have to explain how one of them passed, and show her all the songs that started with liam solos and say how these songs would never sound right even if a 4-man reunion occurred.
i know that liam went wayward over the past few years, and the details of his death are harrowing in that no person should meet their end like that — but i’ve found peace in remembering how much i adored him when i was 15-18 and the person he was then, and letting that be the memory i hold of him.
