sirius

[siriusxorion-1]

regulusblvck​:​

-

He was starting to believe that Sirius was never going to show up. He supposed he couldn’t blame him, they had spent so much time wanting to be apart from each other, why would he want to see him now? Regulus wasn’t even sure if he was prepared for the conversation they would be having, especially now that he was pretty pissed off about the whole animagus bombshell that Severus had dropped on him. Draped across his bed as though he was simply a piece of laundry tossed aside, he bolted upright at the sound of his name being called, immediately dashing out of his room and down the hundreds of stairs.

He was out of breath by the time he’d reached the bottom and he paused for a moment to collect himself. As much as he wanted to bust in on Sirius and start going off on him, he knew better. It wouldn’t earn him any favors, he had to approach this conversation carefully. Straightening out the collar of his shirt, he finally entered the front room, his eyes narrowing at his brother as he moved by him. “You’ve got some explaining to do,” He started, sitting down on the chair across from Sirius, “Snuffles.”

He heard him before he saw him - honestly, the racket he was making he would be surprised if the neighbors didn’t hear him, which was saying something. But perhaps it wasn’t Regulus, perhaps Sirius was just overly sensitive within these walls, slipping into old habits he thought he’d long grown out of. Something about number twelve still made him feel like a child. Still, as Regulus came thundering down the stairs and around the corner, he raised an eyebrow. He looked calm, which Sirius supposed he should have expected. He had been invited, after all. His arms were along the back of the couch, looking much more comfortable than he felt, but it only got worse as soon as Regulus spoke.

Snuffles. He froze, but tried to keep his face neutral. Old habits. Once upon a time, he’d had an excellent poker face when he’d needed to. Now, he wasn’t so sure. “Sounds like you’ve already got an explanation elsewhere.” He supposed there was no use denying it, as terrified as currently was at the prospect that his brother knew his biggest secret. It hadn’t been a question, Regulus knew. Regulus had been the one to name him Snuffles in the first place. No, he couldn’t deny it now. But how? How did he know? Who -? And then it clicked. “Snape.” He finally said, proud of how level his voice came out, although it was still tinged with the disgust it always held when speaking of the other man. It had to be. “Right?”

[siriusxorion-1]

lxaena​:

@siriusxorion​

It felt a lot like her legs were now weighed down with cement. One minute she was walking, and the next, she fell still. “Sirius…” Molly couldn’t pretend she didn’t miss him, and she wanted so badly to just run up to him and hug him tightly. She wanted to ask him how he was doing, if he could tell her about Remus and the others. But she knew he was set in his ways, and a hug would surely lead to him shoving her away. 

“Please– Sirius, can you just give me one minute or–anything.” She’d even accept it if he chose to use the time to berate her. But she just wanted to be able to see him. “…I miss you all so much.”

He’d seen her before she’d noticed him, but he’d been hoping the relatively busy streets might hide him, help him avoid her. But of course, his luck didn’t hold and she was calling his name. He tried to ignore it, to pretend he didn’t hear her or she had the wrong person, but almost without his permission his steps had slowed, but his heart made up for it with the erratic pounding in his chest, his breathing heavy as he tried to keep his temper in check. This was Molly. It wouldn’t do to yell at her - he had been taught better than that. By the Blacks, of all people, the people she had joined.

He turned, only able to meet her eyes for a second, the look of disgust obvious on his face as he then fixed his gaze on a spot just over her shoulder. It was painful - but he didn’t acknowledge that. He only let himself feel the anger. But she was practically begging; how could he simply turn his back? But what did she expect him to say? To do? She’d made her choice. “I have nothing to say to you, Molly.” He said, in clipped, strangled tones as he fought to keep his voice level. “You chose to turn your back on us. You have to deal with that."

[siriusxorion-1]

vanityemmx​:

“I wasn’t supposed to be here tonight was I?” Emma mused, a little smirk on her face as she shimmied out of her sparkly dress before clambering into Sirius’ bed. Emma didn’t tend to drink that much during the quidditch season. She needed to be in the best physical condition that she could be, and excessive drinking did not help with that. But, the Harpies had had a pretty successful week, and they’d gone out drinking to celebrate. Emma was still on a high at them being the quidditch cup winners, so she might have gone a little overboard with the said celebrating.

And some how ended up at her boyfriends house. “Good thing Remus didn’t answer the door” She continued, taking the glass of water from Sirius, but not bringing it up to her lips. “We don’t need another reason for him to hate me even more.” @siriusxorion​

Laughing, Sirius scooted over and angled himself so she could curl easily into him. “If you want to be here, then you’re supposed to be here.” He replied easily, happy that she had decided to just show up. It was the sort of spontaneity he often employed himself, and he was happy to know she had been thinking about him hard enough that her feet had brought her here - even if others might not be so happy. But he wasn’t going to think about that now. Shaking himself slightly to rid himself of any negative thoughts, he reached for his wand, summoning a glass of water and catching it smoothly before handing it off to Emma.

“Ah, he’ll get over it.” Hopefully. “He’s just a bit touchy, I think it’s because he’s a Capricorn.” He chuckled, not really wanting to talk about the fact that Remus - and seemingly all his other friends - didn’t want to fully accept her or their relationship. Even after all this time. But that didn’t matter now, what mattered now was that he had her in his arms, and she was happy. “You guys are doing well, then? Get any new sponsors that might send you free shit? In say a..... large?” He laughed.

[siriusxorion-1]

It was his favorite time of year - he was determined that this year would be no different, although even he was having trouble staying merry and bright. But that's what whiskey was for, right? He took another sip from his bottle at the thought, sighing happily as he turned back to the tangled strand of lights, cursing himself for putting them away so haphazardly the year before. At least when he plugged them in they'd all lit up. He hadn't exactly gotten permission to decorate the house, but he couldn't imagine anyone would mind. 

He caught a movement over his shoulder and tossed an oversized plastic candy cane to whoever it was without really looking. "Put these by the front door, will you?" 

[siriusxorion-1]

dromeda-tonks​:

~

Having family around was important to her, especially for Dora’s sake. There had been a time when she had struggled with the fact that her sisters and parents were never going to meet Dora but then she realized that she didn’t want them in her child’s life. They were so full of hate, so brainwashed by the stupid belief that they were somehow better because they were pure-blood. That feeling was only reinforced by her run in with Bellatrix on Halloween. If she never saw her again it would be too soon. It made her extra grateful to have Sirius and Alice in her life. They were good role models for her daughter, and they loved her, which was the important thing. She wanted Dora surrounded by people that loved her and wanted her in their life. 

Raising an eyebrow and giving him a pointed look. “I don’t think that that’s an answer,” she pointed out. She worried about Sirius more than she would ever tell him. But she never pushed him to open up to her, she just tried to make sure that he knew that she was there if he ever needed something, whether that was a couch to crash on or an ear to listen to him. She nodded her head. “You sure can, can you get the salad all put together for me?” She asked him as she led him into the kitchen. “I’m sure it’ll be great,” she said, waving away his concern. “Dora was so excited to hear that you were coming for dinner tonight.”

“Maybe not.” He shrugged, giving her his signature half grin that basically assured her it was all the answer she was likely to get for the time being. But Andromeda had always been one of the people that was easiest for Sirius to open up to - given his own time, he would come to her. But that’s not what tonight was for. Tonight, he simply wanted to enjoy their company and forget about the rest for as long as anyone would allow him. Which, as long as he didn't’ let himself look too miserable, he thought he may be able to get away with for quite a while. 

He nodded, although her back was to him, and rolled his sleeves up as he followed. “Everything’s in the fridge?” He asked, but opened the door to see for himself without waiting for an answer. Sirius stacked his arms high with everything he’d need, biting his tongue between his front teeth as he tried not to drop anything on his way to the counter, but a single tomato escaped him. “Damn.” He murmured, depositing his bounty in order to reach down and snag it. Sirius tossed it between his hands for a moment as a wide smile crossed his features at the mention of the little girl. “Yeah? Hardly anyone’s ever excited to see me anymore.” He laughed, putting the tomato down so he could get to work actually being helpful. “She staying out of trouble? Merlin, I hope not.”

[siriusxorion-1]

nightmaremckinnon​:

Marlene was supposed to be walking Brisket. She’d insisted that she wanted continue her daily routine at least in this regard, just to have an excuse to leave the house and be alone. The idea of walking through the woods had seemed like it would clear her mind and help her work through her grief, but she hadn’t even made it to the park before she apparated herself and Brisket home. It had been such a stupid idea trying to pretend that everything was normal. How was she supposed to go about her day as if nothing in her life had changed?

She had begged Rita to walk the dog that day and she couldn’t exactly turn around and hand him back after only being out of the house for five minutes, so she’d decided just to take Brisket back to her place, wait for an hour and then return as if they’d gone on their usual walk. Brisket didn’t seem to mind. He was happy to run around in Daisy’s front garden so long as Marlene threw a tennis ball for him every so often. 

She perched on the front step, bouncing the ball along the path and watching Brisket run after it. After a few minutes of this she heard footsteps approaching, looking up to see Sirius. She bounced the ball again, Brisket immediately taking off to chase the thing. “I didn’t kidnap a dog, I’m brining him back in an hour. I just didn’t want to go to the park today.”

@siriusxorion​

He hadn’t seen her in longer than was excusable, and he felt no end of guilt over that. The news had hit him like a punch to the gut. Sirius had been at Order headquarters at the time, and he thought he was going to be sick. So they’d gotten in a stupid fight - what if she had been at her parents house? What if she had - he shook his head. No, a fight about his love life was no excuse to go so long without seeing Marlene when any day could spell the end for any one of them. Reality had slapped him in the face in a cruel way, and as soon as he was able, he’d been out the door and on the way to Daisy’s.

And it was good he came - she looked terrible, as well she should. He only hoped that she wasn’t still mad at him. He wanted - he needed - to be there for her. “No, I know.” He said quietly, his hands in his pockets. “That’s Skeeter’s dog.” Sirius nodded toward Brisket, who came bounding up to him. He’d only ever met the little guy as Snuffles, when Remus and Rita brought them both to the dog park, but Brisket seemed to recognize him all the same. Sirius patted him on the head a few times before moving on, coming to sit next to Marlene and watch as the puppy ran to grab the discarded ball. He wasn’t sure what to say - what was there to say? 

He sighed slightly, leaning into her. “I’m sorry.” He finally managed in a quiet murmur, and he didn’t just mean for what had happened to her family.

[siriusxorion-1]

vanityemmx​:

To say Emma felt furious was an understatement. The moment that she had seen the news paper her mind had instantly gone back to her conversation with Marlene. And it made her feel sick. The whole thing made her feel sick. It hadn’t really affected her,  still didn’t. But Marlene had lost her entire family practically. And because of people she called friends and family. Emma didn’t know who else was involved, and she frankly did not want too. She knew too much already. She knew her father was involved, and he’d dragged her brothers into it too. And that apparently they thought this was okay. They thought that killing innocent people because of their blood status was okay. And Emma did not think that was okay.

Emma hadn’t even known she was going to Sirius’, but then she was there. And she was still furious. She hadn’t really even said hello to him as he opened the door. Instead pushing past him, and flinging the Daily Prophet onto the table. “How fucking dare they…..” She murmured, shaking her head as she spun around to face her boyfriend. “How the fuck can we both come from families that think that is okay! It….. makes me feel sick.” Sick that this had happened. Sick that she had stood by and let it happen for so long. But she was done. @siriusxorion​

He was in a daze. He had known this could happen - likely would, eventually. Hell, it had happened to him. The war had taken his own brother (and then consequently handed him back, but still) , and they’d lost Wendy and countless others, but still.... Somehow he thought their circle would somehow stay safe in their own little bubble. The Marauders, their friends, families.... they’d all be immune to the war around them. But the Death Eaters had shattered his little illusion like it was nothing, and he felt incredibly small and incredibly stupid for not having taken things more seriously.

So when the knock came at the door he opened it without thinking much, nodding as he saw Emma, but for the first time the sight of her didn’t make him feel any better. Sirius closed the door quietly, turning as she spoke. “Mmm.” He hummed noncommittally, nodding again. “That’s....” Truthfully, he didn’t know how to answer and he brought his gaze to hers as he bit the inside of his cheek, his eyes taking a moment to focus. “I don’t know.” He finally whispered, his shoulders sagging as his own silence settled heavy around him. It was too much. “They were like brothers to me.” He murmured.

[siriusxorion-1]

nightmaremckinnon​:

Marlene followed him inside, kicking the door closed behind her a little too loudly. She let the mimicking of her voice drop, because if she hadn’t been mad that he was mad she would’ve found it funny. She rolled her eyes at the first thing he was mad about. Emma was an adult, she could handle seeing Marlene. She didn’t even think she’d said anything that bad. She could’ve been nastier if she’d tried. “So what if she were here? I said what I needed to say to her already and clearly she’s not going to change her mind. No point still talking about it with her.” 

This was Marlene still trying to ‘keep the peace’. She hadn’t lashed out, was talking fairly calmly, trying to remain unbothered by the whole situation but it wasn’t working. Sirius’ fist in the wall told her this was going to escalate from a spat to a full on blazing argument. 

“Why the fuck should I have to keep my mouth shut?!” She spoke with a laugh, but it was obvious she didn’t find it funny - it was Sirius’ cheek of suggesting that she was the one who was in the wrong. “If you haven’t noticed we’re in the middle of a fucking war, and I’m in the wrong for pointing out that your girlfriend is aligned with the opposition. Her family are Death Eaters! They have probably tortured and killed muggles, like every other Death Eater out there. And she is finding it difficult to choose which side to join?! Come on, you don’t think that’s disgusting? It’s like she doesn’t know the difference between right and wrong, and I’m the one whose an arsehole because I asked her what side she was on, and then told her it wasn’t a difficult decision it make. It isn’t a difficult decision to make! Or at least it shouldn’t be. It wasn’t for you. It wasn’t for me. It isn’t a difficult decision for any decent person.”

It wasn’t even worth answering - a fact that was hard for Sirius to learn, but one Remus had been trying to drill into his head for years now. You didn’t always need the last word, some people would never listen. And he could see that Marlene was one of those people, at least with certain things. It wasn’t worth the energy to try and tell her of all the ways she was wrong. But Sirius’ brain and his temper didn’t always see eye to eye.

“So are mine!” He roared, turning around to face her. It wasn’t the same, and he was sure that was her next argument - but Marlene didn’t get it, she couldn’t. Is that what bothered her? That Emma understood Sirius in a way she never could? He couldn’t see why that might matter, but girls had never made much sense to him. “It was easy? You think any of this -” He gestured around at his house vaguely. “Is easy?” It wasn’t as easy to leave as they all thought - as Sirius himself had made it seem. Sure, for him, it wasn’t hard either, but he could have left long before he did, and he hadn’t. They were his family, the only thing he’d ever known - it wasn’t always easy to turn your back on that, good or bad. And at the very least, being on your own was intimidating on it’s own. 

“She hasn’t done anything!” Sirius cried, incredulous. He got what she was saying, sure, but wasn’t she taking it a little far? It’s not like Emma had the Mark, or went around hexing muggles with the rest of them. “She’s not with them.” He shook his head, fighting the insane urge to laugh. “You don’t have to talk to her at all, you get that right? She’s my girlfriend, not yours. You could just - for once - not make everyone else’s life even harder than they already are.” He seethed, knowing he’d likely regret his words later, but that didn’t seem to do anything to halt him now. 

“You don’t have to trust her.” He went on, breathing hard after his outburst as he tried to calm himself unsuccessfully. He hadn’t wanted to fight. “But you should trust me.” And as he met her gaze again, warring with anger in his eyes was hurt. She should believe in him enough to know that he wouldn’t be with someone on the wrong side. 

[siriusxorion-1]

He wasn't entirely sure why he was here. Well, he knew why. He was curious at the very least, and if there was even a glimmer of a chance that Regulus might actually be willing to tell him something, let him in after all this time, he had to at least see if it was for real. He stood on the doorstep, sighing slightly. Even knowing it was only Regulus on the other side of the door and with their last conversation having been oddly pleasant, he was apprehensive as ever as he stared at the imposing, rusted number twelve on the door before him, having to muster the energy to go on. 

"Reg?" He called as he entered, staring around the foyer as if he was expecting it to be suddenly redecorated or something. Interesting to note their mothers portrait was still covered. Sirius went further into the house, shrugging out of his jacket and tossing it in the general direction of the coat rack. Sirius plopped down on the couch before the empty fireplace, scrunching his nose as a cloud of dust rose into the air at the disturbance. "Reg, you here?" He sighed again, wondering if his brother had forgotten he'd asked him to come - or changed his mind. Much more likely, truth be told, and he glanced at his watch, deciding to give him ten minutes to show up or he'd put the house and this idea behind him. 

@regulusblvck​

[siriusxorion-1]

FMK: Remus, Peter, James

You just won't let me out of it, will you? Cruel. Just... somebody do earmuffs for the boys, yeah? Fuck James, marry Remus and kill Peter. I hate you, by the way.

[siriusxorion-1]

FMK: Dirk, Marlene, Alice

I'm..... so sorry Alice, but it's the axe for you. Gotta be, hasn't it? I guess that leaves fuck Marlene and marry Dirk.

[siriusxorion-1]

James, Peter, Remus

Marry all of 'em. We'd be very happy together thank you. Next.

[siriusxorion-1]

Marlene, Dirk, Emma

Now this is just cruel, mate. How am I supposed to answer this without getting in trouble? I... fuck Dirk, marry Emma and kill Marlene.

[siriusxorion-1]

dromeda-tonks​:

Andromeda and Ted’s flat Andy and Sirius @siriusxorion​

Andromeda had made a point of inviting Sirius around for dinner at least once a week. After going through the crushing loneliness in the early years after leaving her family with only Ted and his friends to support her, she didn’t want her cousin to feel like she had. Although she knew that things had been different for him, and for that she was glad for him. Even though he had never been the perfect son that her aunt and uncle had wanted, she had kept her distance even after leaving the family, not wanting to cause trouble for him. It hadn’t been a surprise when she had heard the news that he had left the family too, and she had been secretly glad for it, she had known that he was never going to be happy staying in the family.

Of course the night that she had invited Sirius for dinner was the one night her boss had needed her to stay late, so she had just gotten in herself when she heard the knock at the door. Ted and Dora were still at the park a few blocks over from their flat, and she was just popping dinner into the oven. She pulled the door open and smiled. ‘Hey!” She greeted, moving over so he could come in. “How are you?” She asked, leaning over to hug him. “Ted and Dora should be home soon, I’m just getting in myself, so this is perfect timing.”

He had meant to grab a bottle of scotch from the store that morning - he couldn’t cook and he felt bad that Andromeda was always the one making dinner when they got together, so he was always good for a drink. Always had been, really. But he had gotten carried away working on his bike and lost track of time, and it was either a trip to the store or a shower, and he desperately needed the latter more. So he’d robbed the liquor cabinet of his own house, pretty sure the bottle of red had actually been Remus’, but if it had been in there for that long already he couldn’t see him missing it too much. Maybe Sirius would stop on the way home.

So he’d found himself on the doorstep with still damp hair, but he knew it wouldn’t make a difference to his cousin, and at least he didn’t smell like gasoline. His smile was wide and genuine as the door opened, and he could feel some of the tension he’d been carrying melt away already. “Oh, you know.” He shrugged slightly by way of answer, a bit awkwardly as he was hugging her, and moved further into the house. “Can I help? I brought this, but -” He held out the bottle, scrunching his face slightly. “It wasn’t mine so if it sucks, blame Remus.”

[siriusxorion-1]

l-evxns​:

who: @siriusxorion​​

where: the leaky cauldron

“Are we going to go on a double date or not?” Lily plopped herself down across from Sirius, clearly having begun this conversation in her head but having failed to actually provide the context. “I’m not sure if that’s a thing James and I are still obligated to do, given that we’re actually married and it’s almost always excruciating, but I’d do it for you.”  And partially to have more of an opportunity to observe him and Emma up close- she felt mildly guilty that she hadn’t made more of an effort before now. 

Sirius grinned, shaking his head at the middle of the conversation he suddenly found himself to be a part of. He wasn’t surprised, and lucky for him his years of only half paying attention in class had taught him to catch on to what was happening very quickly. “Yeah, we can go.” He agreed easily, leaning back in his chair and stretching his legs before him under the table. “As long as you promise your husband will behave.” He pinned her with a look, raising an eyebrow. After the whole Marlene debacle on Halloween, he wasn’t entirely sure where any of his friends stood with Emma, and he couldn’t handle any more drama at the moment. But he had a feeling Lily would be his saving grace on this matter, and he appreciated her more than she likely realized. “Not everyone has been so.... accepting.”

[siriusxorion-1]

dirk-crexxwell​:

-

Dirk didn’t get any pleasure out of making Sirius wince, making him look away and feel in the wrong. Did a selfish part of him want it? Yes… But he was trying very hard to keep that part locked away. He’d been taught to be kind, to be better. No one ever mentioned how hard that was to do when it felt like so much else was crumbling down around you. “Good… Thank you.” he added after a few beats had passed. Credit due for him making the effort, but Dirk wasn’t sure Sirius even comprehended how much effort he was making right now either.

He looked down at the other following the snort, a brow raised, “We’re in the same room, we hear the same briefs. We don’t run in the same circles.” Their business was at two very different ends and right now he was grateful for that. “You broke my heart.” Dirk would later blame the firewhiskey for the words slipping out but… maybe he’d just needed the excuse, as soon as they escaped into the world he felt as though a weight had lifted from his shoulders, a small one (in the grand scheme) but a weight nonetheless. “I have to rebuild this huge part of my life and there you are with her… and you want things to have any semblance of normal?” he laughed at the absurdity of it. “How? How can that possibly happen?” His question soft, not accusatory, but genuinely wishing for an answer, for an easy way out.

"That is a circle." Sirius argued half heartedly with a roll of his eyes, not sure he was even speaking loud enough for Dirk to hear him. He didn't want to fight. He'd had enough of that over the past few weeks - from everyone. How had he managed to make such a mess at every turn? He was glad his eyes were already downcast as Dirk continued, as he was sure the pain the words caused him would have been clear. It felt unfair - but he wasn't sure whether it was toward himself or Dirk. A mess. 

Sirius shook his head slowly, even as Dirk spoke. "I don't know." He said quietly, starting to get fed up and knowing it likely wouldn't help his situation but it was the truth - it was all he had. "I don't know, but it has to." He went on, finally looking back up to his friend (ex friend? the possibility was too painful to contemplate), sure his eyes were stormy and emotional, but he was done trying to hide it. He wouldn't lessen himself to please Dirk, he'd done that long enough because it was the right thing to do, because he'd wanted to spare his feelings. But now he didn't want to hide anymore. "It has to, Dirk, and I'm not gonna stop trying." Determined, steely, and yet scared. "I can't…" He sighed, swallowing around a lump in his throat. Even now, he wasn't sure he could be so candid. I can't lose anyone else. "We can't just… we'll have to figure it out. I'll figure it out." 

[siriusxorion-1]

nightmaremckinnon​:

As soon as the door opened she knew that they were going to fight. The speed with which the door flew open, the look on his face and the sharp what. Well, there was no point pretending she was interested in anything else, may as well have it out now. Neither of them were any good at pretending they weren’t mad at the other and she didn’t see the point in stringing it out. In the same way she had at the bar with Emma, Marlene preferred to clear the air, say the nasty stuff they needed to and move on. 

“Oh here we go. Lets have it then. Say whatever bullshit you need to say just say it, as if you wouldn’t agree with me if she were anyone else.” Marlene adopted her usual aggressive pose, arms folded, stern glare. “Invite me in so we’re not arguing on the door step about this. Its cold.” 

Sirius wasn't one to shy away from confrontation - he was combative and argumentative and stubborn. He preferred his fists over his wand and he had an ugly temper that he'd never quite gotten the hang of controlling. But he didn't want to fight with Marlene. He didn't like to fight his friends, but he knew he was going to. They had to, because looking at her standing there on his stoop all he wanted to do was wring her neck. 

His scowl only deepened, his anger flaring at her words. Why did he have to be the one in the wrong? How many times would he be the one that got whacked on the nose with a newspaper until his friends had had enough? Without a word, he turned and walked back into the house, leaving the door open. It was all the invitation she was going to get. “It’s cold.” He mimicked under his breath, in a poor impersonation of her voice as he padded back toward the living room. "You shouldn't have come over, what if she was here?" He asked coldly, without looking back at her. He took a deep breath, but it did no use and he slammed a hand into the wall next to him as he turned to glare at her. "Damn it, Marlene, can't you just keep your fucking mouth shut? Just once?"