Untitled @skepticalsigilspider - Tumblr Blog

I feel like I spend all my time trying not to hear voices and end up getting nothing done.

I had a good time with my grandparents yesterday. It went really well even though I didn't expect to eat dinner there but it's so like my grandma to prepare a whole feast.

I ate plenty of food and at least I didn't binge but I feel awful about eating so much.

Today I'm on my own again - like usual - which feels great but also like "I wish I wasn't alone all the time".

I want to try to save money but that's been a struggle this month. I think about money a lot.

The voices have been bad this month too and I haven't really told anyone. I don't want to get admitted again but I don't feel great. I shared something about the voices with my dad and he seemed concerned. Maybe I should be too? I don't know. My head is no fun to be in atm.

It's so hard to get back on track but I'm really trying to end binging.

Today I'm seeing my grandparents so I have to eat with them. I'm looking forward to seeing them even though we have a weird relationship. My grandma has always been extra hard on me.

I've been struggling mentally the last few days with voices and bad thoughts. Making losing weight and not binging more challenging.

I've not been doing well food wise. Been binging a lot this week. Now I'm drinking iced coffee and playing animal shelter again. Hoping this weekend is going to go better.

I'm seeing my grandmother on sunday together with my siblings. I have a weird relationship with her. I hope it goes well!

Didn't get out of bed till 2pm. Went grocery shopping. Overate. Feel weird/off now. Like "what now" bc I've eaten all my kcals for today.

The days feel so long. It's unbearable to exist atm

Iced coffee and podcast while pacing.

I had fun with my friend yesterday. We drank soda and knitted in the library. She feels really close/connected to me, but I still feel like we are strangers. But I like her. I met her while I was inpatient and currently she's my only not-online friend so I do appreciate someone I can meet up with in person.

I've been feeling so off these past few days. Lots of anxiety. Today I'm gonna see a friend for ice cream (hopefully). I hope spending time with someone will help my anxiety calm down.

Now I'm gonna drink iced coffee and play video games.

Didn't really sleep last night. Gonna drink iced coffee and play Animal Shelter.

Drinking iced coffee and trying to read. Today feels like a good day

I crave attention so badly. A community. A feeling of belonging.

I feel so lost and alone.

There's a reading group today (a text being read aloud and then we talk about it). I don't have to go but it's one of those things that I really should go to.

But I just wanna stay inside and do nothing :(

I went to the gaming club and it went okay despite anxiety. Now I'm just chilling with music and tumblr

I feel so worthless but I lost weight since this morning so yay...

Starting today with iced coffee. I lost the weight that I gained due to overeating on friday + saturday.

Today feels better than yesterday. It helps it's cooler than it was yesterday and less humid.

Plans for today is going to a gaming club with a recovery mentor. Other than that, no plans. I hope the gaming club is fun. I'm bringing my steam deck.

skepticalsigilspider

Yesterday sucked but today feels better. The voices aren't that bad today.

skepticalsigilspider

Who am I kidding. The voices are bad and I'm still not used to them.

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