Or nah.

I will be your constant through it all. Love and light, Prei

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I’m a Home Buddy and I Love It

Imagine a Friday night with your favorite ice cream and a good movie. Sounds great, right? Now imagine another Friday night, but this time, with your favorite album on repeat and a good book. Sounds great, as well, doesn't it? This time, imagine a Friday night with your favorite tv series and a whole box of pizza just for you. Heaven, it is. But what's your idea of a Friday night, really? Is it staying in just like these or a fun party with your fun friends? Whatever it is, we all know what would make us happy on a Friday night.

Let's get one thing straight -- me being a home buddy is my personal choice, but then I realized there were external factors that led me to that decision.

Ever since I was a kid, I've been a home buddy. First of all, we don't have an expensive lifestyle, we've only lived within our simplest means. However, some people never understand that, which really grinds my gears. Some of my them always tell me to go out and have fun but truth be told, I can't afford to "go out and have fun" like they always do. The money that I will be spending on commute or a friend's gas will be better off in my piggy bank or in my wallet so I wouldn't have to ask for extra money from my Mom whenever I need something extra for school. Don't get me wrong, though, there are times when I allow myself to actually "go out and have fun" but during the daylight only, even though my Mom would allow me to stay out until dark. It's a personal choice, really, to limit myself from having "too much fun", not because I might do something stupid, but because the people around me might do something stupid.

See, being a home buddy has its downside, as well. Trust issues, it has always been in my system. I never really liked the people around me, I do choose my friends very carefully. Especially nowadays, kids my age are just so damn unpredictable. One time they're your friends, the other they're not. I never liked that idea. I mean, yes, people are going to come and go in your life, but you have to learn how to protect yourself from such people. I've also been called boring, kill joy, party pooper, name it. NEWS FLASH, I really don't give a shit about what people say about me. I don't wanna come off like a little biatch right here, but that's how I roll and you can't do anything about it, anyway. Remember this, my fellow home buddy, it's not your fault we have different ways of "having fun".

One other reason I've been a home buddy ever since the world began is this. Click this. Okay, it was mentioned in one of my previous posts that I am an only child and I have strict parents. You still with me? All right. But it was also mentioned that I learned how to have fun at home in so many ways. On the other hand, honestly, if my parents were not that tight with me, I'd still choose to be a home buddy. What did I tell you, it's a personal choice. I really find it more fun with nobody else but me, myself, and I.

I'm all about that cozy life!

Love and light, Prei

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12 Things You Need To Know About Dating A Partner Who Doesn’t Show Affection

by Jen Mac

Partners who don’t show an abundance of affection to their significant others (or children, friends, and family members) are typically Thinking (T) types on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. These partners view the world from a logical (and often impersonal) perspective and relationships are no exception. Not surprisingly, it can be difficult for their caring, warm, and more sensitive Feeling (F) counterparts to understand lovers who rarely show emotion, let alone affection.

It can be tricky to navigate the meaning of the subtle signs that these partners leave like bread crumbs on your dates, but once you understand how this type of partner shows affection, you will find an abundance of love in those crumbs.

Here’s what you need to know:

Holding hands is out of the question.Holding hands is not practical. It slows people down, throws people off balance, and forces couples to walk in cadence. If you try to grab your non-affectionate partner’s hand while walking, expect your grasp to be broken within 10 seconds.

They are as cuddly as a cactus. On the rare occasions that these partners want to cuddle, their embrace is perfectly warm, loving, and peaceful. For the other 9 out of 10 times you try to cuddle with this partner, it’s chaos and not worth the fight- they are too warm, they are uncomfortable, they can’t see the TV. Try putting a hand on their knee for physical affection.

They are a physical affection camel. That one night of snuggling will have to last you several weeks until your next movie date night. This partner only has so many ‘movie date night snuggles’ in them and they just reached their quota for the month.

A hand on your leg means a lot. You may not get a full cuddling session for several weeks, but you will get small moments of affection, like a surprise hug or a kiss on your forehead. These small signs of affection have big feelings behind them. Appreciating these little moments will help you understand your partner’s feelings towards you.

They don’t need to talk about their feelings. Even on your wedding day, you and your partner still won’t have a long, heartfelt discussion about your feelings towards each other. You will likely have the same 5 minute, straight forward conversation about your practical future together that you had when you got engaged.

There will still be passion in your relationship. Dating someone who is pragmatic doesn’t mean that all the passion is going to be leaked out of your relationship. Partners who don’t show affection often will make up for this emotional void by showing their love through gestures- like bringing home flowers, or cleaning the house on their day off, or cooking a candlelit dinner.

Public displays of affection are out of the question. As you sit in the café, watching couples kiss and sit on the same side of the booth, whispering sweet nothings to each other, you and your partner are sitting on opposite sides of the booth-where you can have a discussion face to face (like adults) and not make the waitress uncomfortable.

Tenderness is only shown privately. You will likely need to repeat to your friends over and over again “he really is different when we are alone.” And like most mythological tales, your friends just won’t believe your tale of the formidable boyfriend who is a soft, cuddly bear at home.

Sometimes, you have to sneak in your affection. There are ways to get extra moments of tenderness when you really need it. Try giving your partner a back rub or scratching their arm while you’re sitting on the couch. They’ll be suckered by your pampering and will let you crawl into their nook.

If you want to snuggle, make them come to you. Give this partner the space to show affection in their own way. If you force your love on them or try to force them to show you love, then your partner is going to feel overwhelmed and stifled.

They still have feelings of love and affection, they just don’t need to show it all the time. Stoic men and pragmatic females feel feelings too, they just show it in different, more simplistic ways. The trick is to appreciate these moments (and the meaning behind them) when they happen.

When they say “I love you”, they mean it. The best part about dating this type of partner is that they don’t waste time trivially saying “I love you.” They say it when they mean it. And there is nothing more powerful than hearing those three words and knowing that your partner means it with all their heart.

[source]

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10 Reasons Why I’ve Been Single Since Forever

I have strict parents - Well, not only my parents, but also my whole family. They all grew up in the province so they 'd rather have their Generation Y to study first and have a decent job before entering a relationship. For as long as possible, they want us, me, to prioritize my school and other stuff before I wreck myself by getting a boyfriend.

Study first - As mentioned in the very first and top reason, I have to prioritize my studies. I'm in college now and in two years, I will be graduating and entering adulthood. This one is actually a personal choice, since nowadays the youth can do whatever the hell they want. I'd rather have a diploma that I can actually present to my parents to prove that I worked my ass off in school; everything they've done for me is going to be returned if not in the same amount. Having said this, I would want to give my family first a better life before anything else.

I want to focus on myself - How am I going to handle a relationship if I can't handle my own self? Check yourself before you wreck (yourself) others. I'd rather have my life figured out than being in a relationship where both of us have no idea what's really going on.

I prefer to be alone - Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Obama-seeeelf... Although the next words are "don't wanna be all by myself", in my case, I always want to be all by myself. Maybe it's because I'm an only child and it's how I grew up. In everything I do, I'd rather do it alone. Even if it's a groupwork, give me my part and I'll do it. This is because I believe that I do more efficiently when I'm alone. This brings me to the fifth reason..

I don't think I need one - I'm an only child and growing up, my parents taught me to be independent. I grew up doing everything on my own, even my dad taught me to do boy works in the house, i.e., replacing screws, fixing wiring, and the like. I can practically live alone without the need of a significant other. Perhaps you'd think this is just the same with #4 but you can still prefer to be alone while enjoy a presence of a boyfriend/girlfriend. 

It takes time and money - Everyone I know knows I am such a cheapskate and a home buddy. Boring, right? I never liked spending so much money on clothes, shoes, or whatever. I also never liked going out since (see reasons #1 and #4) I was kind of conditioned that I must spend my time wisely because "time is gold". Being in a relationship certainly requires giving occasional gifts and going out to movies, parks, or fancy dinners. I'd rather read my untouched books and write a review or a fan fiction but I'm never going out on a date. Maybe if I had a boyfriend, he'd be so annoyed he'll break up with me after a few weeks, because, "Man, Prei is so boring." Also, I'd rather watch FRIENDS for the millionth time. Anyone down for that? I don't think so. 

I'm too ambitious - I've got so much plans for the future, for me and my family, and I have to exert so much time and effort to be able to achieve them. I would be too busy to meet potential guys to be my boyfriend. And being in a relationship means having the need to settle anytime in the future, because what's the point if you're doing it just for fun, right? I don't see myself settling just yet, because my ambitions and goals are blocking the way.

Trust issues - Almost relationships? I had those. Some guy would walk into your life, taking your breath away, and then leaving you right after. Well, maybe not right after, because there will always be the sweet words and best-dressed lies. I was once a stupid high schooler, too. I actually thought this guy was serious about courting me but then gave up after a week. The time they found out they won't be getting anything from me anytime soon, they will walk away. Nobody's ever stayed and waited. When a guy says he'll wait for you, prepare yourself to be alone again soon.

Boys somehow get intimidated - I really don't know why. I may be snobbish and my resting bitch face might scare away some at times, but once you get to talk to me in the most unexpected and random ways, this resting bitch face of mine automatically lights up and will surely brighten your day. Kidding aside, it's only what my friends used to tell me. Boys would somehow back out in getting to know me, because of the thought I'd ignore them right there and then. I don't know, I'm not really sure.

I believe in destiny - Yes, loud and proud. If there will come a time that some guy will sweep me off of my feet, then so be it. But if I'm meant to stay single for the rest of my life, I'd gladly accept it with open arms. Sometimes, though, I'd imagine myself as a girlfriend, but it only makes me cringe so I wave the thought off right away. But there are times that I'd get jealous of the couple-y stuff I see on the internet, wishing that somehow, someday, someone will be with me and we'll be happy together. Okay, so that confused me. Anyway, whatever the universe's decision may be, I can't do anything about it. 

Originally published on Listicle, can also be found on Wordpress.

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Only Child & Strict Parents Combo

So these past weeks, there's this trend on Twitter #GrowingUpWithStrictParents. I kind of followed this hashtag since I grew up, and still growing up, with strict parent/s. Luckily on my part, I am an only child so that made my parents only extra strict. Yay! *kindly note the sarcasm*

I was never allowed to go out without a chaperon until I was fifteen, and it only covered a 50-mile radius from our house. I needed to come home before sun down, and don't even think you can go out again if you came home after 6pm. My phone's got load only for parental texting purposes. Update Mom and Dad where you are now, who you're with, what you're having for lunch, for snacks, what you're drinking, how much money you still have, how long since you last went to the bathroom, is it traffic, and the list could go on and on. It's basically a guilt-trip that you shouldn't have gone out with your friends, that you should've stayed home so you're not making them worry.

But before all of those, the struggle of asking permission from your parents comes first. You would have a mini speech prepared so they would be convinced in the littlest way possible. You will wait for the perfect timing, not to ask for permission, but to slightly say something about the plan you have with your friends, hoping they'd get the hint and praying they'd say yes. You will have to have a plan days or even a week before the main event so they would still have time to deliberate whether or not to let you go out. You will give your best shot at everything you do, wash the dishes, clean the house, make your bed, finish your homework early, put the trash out. Just never ever do something stupid, or anything that might lead to stupidity, for that matter.

It's what actually led me to being a home buddy. Since I can't go out as often as I want to, I'd rather make myself more comfortable at home and utilize everything that I can. I learned to make my very own healthy BLT sandwich and milkshake while I prepare my own little fort to have a marathon on Harry Potter or FRIENDS. I learned to have fun on my own, never a dull moment alone. Some days I'd put Spotify on shuffle and dance along to whatever plays. I may say I feel bored at home but there is always something to do. Fold the laundry, change your sheets, organize your stuff, try on the clothes you've never worn, take selfies, update your Facebook status, and online-chat with your friends. It's just me, though, I don't know about you.

However, we all know that our strict parents only mean well. Especially for an only child like I am, they want only the best for me. They've become so overprotective but I never mind, really. There will come a time when they will finally let you fly on your own wings and you'll be thankful you had strict parents.

Love and light, Prei

Originally posted on Wordpress