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SaneTaru Brainrot never stops. Grammar is probably iffy, but I’m too lazy to fix anything. Sometimes I get ideas and I write them down. I might turn it into a comic for Instagram later.
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Sanemi comes back from a mission to see Hotaru, but he has a really bad fever that hes been ignoring. Its been a month since hes seen her, so he missed her a ton. Hotaru runs to answer the door to see Sanemi. Something was off as he basically collapses onto her. She struggles for a bit to keep him up, but eventually carries him to her room. Her home is very simple with very minimal amounts of things as she is very frugal. She lays him down onto the futon and runs over to grab the Yukata she has for him when he stays over. Shes blushing, even though they have slept together she feels nervous undressing him when hes unconscious. Sanemi stirs in his sleep, but she manages to get him changed and under the covers. She also sent Juusaburou to retrieve fever medication from the Butterfly estate. The rest of the night Hotaru is caring for Sanemi and she ends up falling asleep curled up next to him, but on top of the sheets and not under. She hadn't plan to sleep yet, but sleep took over.
 In the morning Sanemi wakes up to see Hotaru curled up next to him. He realizes he made it Hotaru's but doesn't remember the rest of what happened. He reaches over to stroke her cheek and immediately moved her under the covers, poor girl is freezing cold. Hotaru stirs in her sleep, but doesn't quite wake up. Sanemi feeling a lot better with the rest goes to make breakfast for Hotaru who is still asleep.Â
 Hotaru wakes up panicked, where in the world did Sanemi run off to? She could smell food but doesn't remember making any. As she made her way to the kitchen area she is greeted by Sanemi who kisses her on the forehead. It was always Hotaru's favorite morning greetings from him. "Nemi! You should be in bed resting! I was so worried about you." Sanemi grumbles "I'm feeling a lot better now, thanks for taking care of me. But if you get sick too I'll be pissed." Hotaru sighs into a giggle. She sits down at the table to enjoy the home cooked meal Sanemi prepared, she always felt such joy eating his cooking.
Hotaru reaches into a bush for something and cuts her hand. Sanemi immediately grabs her hand without thinking, cleans the cut and puts ointment on it. "You should be more careful, a cut this big could leave a scar." Hotaru is completely red because Sanemi is holding her hand. She notes that his hands are very large and rough. "Don't you need this ointment Shinazugawa-san?" He replies with "Shinobu gave it to me, but I haven't bothered to use it." Hotaru glances at all of his scars and back at her own hand which Sanemi is carefully bandaging. He stops for a split second, realizing how soft and delicate her hands were and how small they were in comparison to his own. His ears get pink, but otherwise he forces himself to keep his composure. Hotaru thanks him and he acknowledges it with a deep hum.
I guess I'm in a writing mood tonight. Picking out some old doodles that I had stories attached to. Its supposed to be a bit angsty, so I hope I get those feelings across. Whos gravestone is that? One of my other ocs. If you pay attention to my Instagram you might now who. Â
Again without fail. She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t go up there to see her. Hotaru stood at the entrance of the graveyard, feet planted firmly to the ground as if she was a root ingrained into the Earth. Every time she tried to go in it was as if her body did not allow it. After 4 years, she had yet to be able to enter. This place which she feels she does not deserve to set foot in.
Hotaru clutched at her uniform pants, tugging at the fabric. Her grip so tight that her knuckles turned white. She hung her head low as her mint colored eyes remained glued to the ground below. The leaves beneath her dances around her feet as the wind guides them away from her. How sad, even the leaves did not want to be around her.
She heaved a heavy sigh and just as she lifted her head up to get ready to leave she notices a familiar figure coming down the steep steps before her. A head of white, violet eyes, chest displayed proudly and littered with scars. Sanemi Shinazugawa. He must have been here to visit his fallen comrades, though it was strange hes never mentioned anyone he was close with.
“S..Shinazugawa-san. Good afternoon!” Hotaru forced a smile, bowing in his direction. Usually she found it almost impossible to not flash him a warm smile. Today was different though. She was happy to see him, but other thoughts clouded her mind and ate away at her heart. Smiling was just too difficult of a task for her at this moment.
“Ozaki. Hey..good afternoon.” Sanemi replies casually, taking his sweet time descending the stone steps. He stood before her, eyes unintentionally trailing over to her soft pink lips where a warm smile usually greeted him. Today was different. That smile he got so used to faltered. He averted his gaze when he caught her eyes meeting his.Â
“Go see them.” Sanemi chimes in as he continues to keep his eyes away from the woman before him. Throughout the years he has caught her standing there from the moment he enters to the moment he leaves. But back then they were strangers, so he never bothered to approach her. Â
“But...” Hotaru’s eyes glimmered as the sun’s rays trickle through the trees to shine into her minty orbs. She bit her bottom lip, barely able to muster up a reply. “how do I bring myself to see the people I...people I murdered?”
Sanemi turned his head abruptly. “Look at me!” he barked, earning Hotaru’s attention. When he was certain she was focused on him and only him, he reached over and flicked her forehead.Â
“euuh!” Â
As Hotaru babied her new forehead wound Sanemi clicks his tongue. “Listen, whatever you’re holding against yourself. Drop it. You come here for 4 years fucking straight. Whoever it is you clearly love them enough to keep coming back. If they are so important to you they must feel the same about you. They will certainly forgive you.” He grumbles near the end, clearly getting frustrated that he even pulled all of that out of his ass. “Just, go and visit them. Otherwise I’m dragging your ass up there.”
Later that day, the setting sun paints the Earth a warm orange, embracing all of its inhabitants in a gentle hug. Hotaru sat in front of a gravestone, a bouquet of pink flowers resting against the slab of stone.
Old doodle, but I wanted to write this scene out for a while now.Â
Keep reading below..
“Pull up your top.” Sanemi demanded as he took a seat behind Hotaru, setting down the bandages and cloths. Hotaru let out a squeak, shaking her head furiously. She knew he was only trying to help, but the thought of him seeing any skin that was more than her hands and face got her burning up.Â
The two had finished a mission not too long ago. The mission itself wasn’t too difficult, but of course Hotaru being as careless as she is rushed in without thinking resulting in her receiving a rather nasty injury around her abdomen. It was nothing life threatening if treated soon. But at this rate the stubborn blonde might just pass from blood loss.
“Don’t make me repeat myself Ozaki.” Sanemi grew rather impatient, he was very much ready to just pull up her top just to treat her wound with or without her consent. He wasn’t about to let her bleed herself to death. The blood seeped through Hotaru’s uniform pants as it continued to flow out of her wound. Her lower half of her uniform top along with her belt is now drenched. Hotaru’s vision grew blurry and she became weak.
She finally gave in, slowly lifting her top up just enough for Sanemi to treat her wound. She wobbled slightly as she did so and felt herself be steadied by a strong hand on her shoulder. Sanemi didn’t say anything as he got to work quickly, cleaning and bandaging her up.Â
“..Don’t you value your life at all?” Sanemi broke the silence. Hotaru couldn’t see what expression he was making as her back faced him. She focused her eyes to the ground, staying silent. She didn’t know how to respond to him. Of course she didn’t value her life. She didn’t deserve it in the first place. Sanemi shifted over enough to see the dejected expression on the blonde’s face.Â
“If you wanted to die so badly you would’ve done so already. If you don’t quit being so damn reckless I’ll kill you myself.” He says with a very obvious hint of annoyance in his voice. Sanemi gathers the leftover materials, setting them aside in a neat bundle. Hotaru giggled softly to herself, whispering “That would be nice.”
Sanemi could feel the veins on his forehead pulsate when he heard what she said. “The fuck did you just say?”
“Nothing!” Hotaru chokes out as she waved her hands around frantically. She couldn’t help but laugh at Sanemi’s little outburst. He is usually very composed around her. It just seemed funny that maybe he cared about her existence. That might not be the case, but she couldn’t get the feeling that he did out of her head for the rest of that night.
Visit my instagram to view the rest of the comic:Â www.instagram.com/chaudofu/
Its been a while since I’ve written anything, so I’m sorry if nothing makes sense. DSFGHJ
A few months had passed since meeting Genya Shinazugawa. Although they started off being awkward and distant with each other they both quickly bonded over one common interest, Sanemi Shinazugawa. Hotaru had been sending messages via crow to the younger Shinazugawa, keeping him updated on how Sanemi was doing when she had the chance to. It wasn’t often that Hotaru met up or had missions with Sanemi, but it was enough to keep Genya updated.Â
She never felt that it was her responsibility to push Sanemi into talking to his younger brother. As much as she’d like for them to make up with one another, shes no one to these two and especially no one to Sanemi. Hotaru had arranged for Genya to meet with her for lunch to catch up. Although she didn’t have much money she never felt hesitant to treat Genya. He is Sanemi’s younger brother afterall.
The two meet at a little restaurant where Hotaru purchased some bentos for them. She made sure to get him the nicer option with more food and just a regular one for herself. She figured he needed more food being how massive he is for a sixteen year old. This kid is just a teen and towered over Hotaru, it was a little embarrassing having to look up at him sometimes.
Genya arrived shortly and the two take a seat outside. The breeze rolling by was refreshing and the warmth of the sun embraced the two slayers in a gentle hug. The younger Shinazugawa thanks Hotaru for the food, taking no time to start digging in. Poor boy seemed to be starving. Was Himejima feeding him properly? Who knows. Hotaru couldn’t help but to giggle at the sight. “Careful Genya, you’ll choke! Remember to breathe!” Hotaru scolds him, waving her chopsticks at Genya who inhales the bit of food dangling from his mouth to mumble a quick “sorry”.
It took no time at all for Genya to finish his food while Hotaru still slowly picked at her own. Genya fidgeted in his seat, he seemed nervous about something. The two had been chatting casually, bringing up Sanemi here and there and catching up on how their own missions went for the past hour or two. Hotaru had noticed that there was something up with Genya. It wasn’t unusual for him to be a little nervous around her, she knew how he acts arounds girls and she wasn’t an exception. But this time was a little different.
“Something on your mind Genya?” she asked, her voice laced with concern. Perhaps she upset him somehow. If that was the case she wanted to apologize as soon as possible.
“Ah, Ozaki-san, I’ve been meaning to ask.” Genya turned away, the tips of his ears now tinted a light shade of pink. Hotaru looked over at Genya who sat beside her with her head tilted slightly. She hummed in response to give him the okay. “What do you think of Aniki? Do you like him?”. What a silly question to get nervous about.
“What do I think of him? Well, I think hes really kind..” Hotaru paused, thinking back to the times she caught Sanemi helping out some elders, to the times she caught him feeding the stray dogs, to the times he was so sweet to the children that they had met on their joint missions together. Though he was trying to be sneaky about it, she was able to witness all of it and held these memories close to her heart. He really wasn’t what he tried to portray himself as. She smiled and continued. “No one would believe me, but I’ve seen the way he treats people behind our backs. I know hes not a bad guy. I also admire that he works so hard to make sure that others can stay safe from demons.”Â
“Uh...W-what I meant was. Do you LIKE Aniki?”, as much as Genya wanted to keep listening to Hotaru praise his older brother. He wanted to know what she really felt for Sanemi. Genya wants his brother to fall in love, to get married and to live a happy life. Who wouldn’t want that for their loved one? To him, Hotaru seemed to be a perfect fit for Sanemi. He could have been biased at the time as they’ve become closer throughout the months. But Genya truly feels comfortable around Hotaru and wouldn’t mind that she remained in both his and his brother’s live. After this war, he wanted to spend more time together as a family.
“EH?? I uh..well...!” Hotaru drops her chopsticks, her face burning from embarrassment. Is that what he really meant when he asked that question. How silly of her to misunderstand. She cleared her throat, patting her chest gently to help herself calm down. A wave of sadness rushed over her. She knew Sanemi and her would never be a thing. She had realized her feelings for him a while ago, but it wouldn’t be right to pursue them. How unnecessary love is during a time like this. She couldn’t be selfish, besides, Sanemi would never love someone like her.
Hotaru lowered her head, she forced a smile as she spoke. “Shinazugawa-san would never see me that way.” She clenched her fist, tugging at the fabric of her pants. Her heart felt like it was being crushed by a ton of bricks. Why was it so difficult to accept that he’d never fall for her. “I’m sure one day he’ll find someone more suited for him...someone strong just like he is...” She knew. She knew that someone who would abandoned her own loved ones to save her own life wasn’t worth anything. She didn’t deserve to be loved, not by anyone and especially not by Sanemi. A strong individual like Sanemi would never bat an eye in her direction. If he knew what shes done, he would spit in her face.
“...and definitely not a coward like me.” she looked up to the sky, voice wavering at the last sentence. As long as Sanemi is happy, thats all that matters.Â
During this whole exchange, Sanemi sat on the rooftop of the restaurant listening to their conversation. He was frustrated to find out how she felt about him. He had begun to realize his own feelings not too long ago, but was more worried that she’d feel the same. As much as he wanted to call her his own, he knows that he can’t. But hearing Hotaru confess how she wasn’t fit for him made him want to smash the roof to pieces with his fist. Ah, he was mad. He shouldn’t be mad, this is what he wanted. He can’t afford to get close to someone again. Not after everything hes been through.Â
He stood, taking in the voices of the two dearest to him just for another second before taking off.Â
