Dumping ground for kirui's overabundance of SnK feels. Contains lots of Scouting Legion backstory speculation--especially for Levi, Hanji, Mike, and Erwin. All headcanons may lead to crack. You have been warned. Affiliated with SnK-Notes.
im sorry if this is a dull subject (or if its been asked before) but what do you think standards of beauty would be within the walls? particularly in the inner wall where people would have more time to be concerned with that sort of thing? i was thinking it could be similar to the 18th century where it was fashionable to be a bit chubbier as it looked like you could afford rich foods?
This is not a dull subject nor has it been asked before! With regards to beauty standards of the wealthy, in a setting thatâs explicitly patterned off of what looks to be Late Middle Ages/Early Modern Europe, I think yours is a fairly logical rationale.
18th century Europe, 17th century, hell, go back 13th century evenâif we look at portraits of most well-off persons from those eras (and not just in Europe!), they were all generally depicted to be pale (either from lack of light exposure or artificially achieved via powder), with soft/rounded features and face paint/cosmetic enhancement of some sort and form. The paleness can be tied to the idea (one that is pervasive in many cultures) that darker skin indicates your regular involvement in manual labour, which usually takes place outdoors; which means regular sun-exposure; which is something only people without money have to do; and which is thus undesirable. Then thereâs the soft/rounded features in both body and face; Iâd posit that this particular ideal wouldnât just be attributable to having access to rich/a lot of foods, but would also tie back to the utter lack of strenuous physical activity.
Now, outside of Sina, the beauty standards may be drastically differentâespecially the further away you get from the capital (influence being inversely proportional to distance). They might emphasize attire/cosmetics/what personal belonging is on display, moreso than the particularities of fleshy contours. There might have developed standards where, in the absence of good means to control your bodily appearance, the focus would probably shift to even more external aspects. Instead of âMy body is literally a physical embodiment of my wealth and since my wealth is beautiful, so am Iâ it would be a âThis accessory is beautiful, and since itâs on me, so am I.â Â
So in short, for the most likely beauty standards that would be alive and kicking in Sina, and especially of those in the upper class, itâs more likely than not that soft-and-voluptuous was the way to go about impressing your peers. It makes sense that a glorification of an âAll play and no workâ standard of living would naturally result in aesthetics that properly reflect such standards.Â
((Months later, I finally get around to answering this replyâand this is an abridged version of what Iâd originally wanted to write. Â Sorry for the wait, anon. And for the utter rubbish this reply is. orz))
Nopeâsorry, anon! Â Am technically mainland Chinese, nation-hopped a bit during my prepubescence, only to somehow have ended up in the U.S. Â :D; Iâd only visited Singapore for the first time last summer.
MIKE. MIIIIIIKE. THAT SMOOTH, VELVET DELIVERY. :D : D: D I bet Erwin would be reconsidering the ârejectedâ status of this campaignânot a fundraiser, but perhaps a recruiting effortâŠ?Â
Thank you so much ask-mikasa-and-eren and Nifty for doing this. This is everything I could have imagined. You guys nailed it. 10/10, will replay again.
100 More Rumours Concerning the Recon Squad Leaders, Erwin Smith, & Certain Members of the 104th Graduating Class
A/N: After missing my self-imposed deadline of snk-notes' first year anniversary, I've finally managed to push through with the last few rumours. Huzzah for perseverance! Coming up with 100 rumours alone was definitely harder than I thought it'd be and damn did it take a long time.
Dedication: For gestahlt, my partner-in-crime when it comes to the irreverent practice of slathering crack onto everything you hold dear. Happy belated first-year anniversary to snk-notes!
For more rumours:Â 100Â Rumours Concerning the Recon Squad Leaders, Erwin Smith, & Dott Pixis
_______________
More Rumours Concerning Captain Levi
001)Â Captain Levi almost killed a person during one of his cleaning sprees.
002)Â Captain Levi almost killed Squad Leader Hanji during one of his cleaning sprees.
003)Â Captain Levi once disemboweled a guy with the remains of a broken teacup.
004) They say that Captain Levi joined the military only because Commander Erwin promised him a growth-spurt and used Squad Leader Mike as an example.
005)Â Captain Levi canât climb onto his own horse without assistance.
006)Â When Captain Levi visits the sick bay, infection rates drop by 30% immediately thereafter.
007)Â Captain Levi suffers from constipation. Thatâs why he always looks the way he does.
008)Â Captain Levi suffers from constipation. Thatâs why heâs so obsessed with shit and shit jokes.
009)Â At the last Annual Military Summit, Captain Levi attempted to polish Commander Pixisâ head with his cravat and nobody tried to stop him.
010) Captain Levi once won a horse in a card game.
5 MORE RUMOURS CONCERNING THE SCOUTING LEGION AND MILITARY POLICE VETERANS
101) On the one time that Nile Dok won a bet against Levi, he asked for a specific favour involving the latterâs convenient lack of height to lure targets into the Milatary Policeâs latest crackdown on crime. This incident is otherwise known as Great Pedophile Purge of Year 844.
102) Mike Zakarius has collective insurance on certain body parts: nose (1 million), legs (300k per leg), and all 12 of his abs (25k per ab), the proceeds of which shall be evenly distributed among his 27 illegitimate children.
103) Erwin Smithâs megawatt handsome smile can be used as an alternative power source.
104) Hange Zoe once created a love potion which included hair from Erwin Smithâs eyebrows, Mike Zakariusâ used bathwater and Leviâs sweat.
105) It was tested by Nile Dok, who got married 2 months afterwards.Â
ANOTHER 5 RUMOURSÂ CONCERNING THE SCOUTING LEGION AND MILITARY POLICE VETERANS
106) Erwin Smith was voted in a newspaper polling as âSoldier Iâd Most Like to Discipline Meâ by both male and female readers.
107)Â Nile Dok was voted in that same newspaper polling as âSoldier Iâd Most Like to Have an Obscene Amount of Children with Even if Heâs Already Marriedâ by female readers.
108)Â Mike Zakarius was once voted in a red-light district survey as âBest Lay Within The Walls.â
109)Â Hange Zoe is commonly referred to as âOur Bespectacled Vine-Brewing Saviour, all hailâ in all scientific communities.
110)Â Levi Ackerman was once voted in another red-light survey as âSoldier Iâd Most Like to Keep in My Purse Because He Seems the Most Fun-sized.â
100 More Rumours Concerning the Recon Squad Leaders, Erwin Smith, & Certain Members of the 104th Graduating Class
A/N: After missing my self-imposed deadline of snk-notes' first year anniversary, I've finally managed to push through with the last few rumours. Huzzah for perseverance! Coming up with 100 rumours alone was definitely harder than I thought it'd be and damn did it take a long time.
Dedication: For gestahlt, my partner-in-crime when it comes to the irreverent practice of slathering crack onto everything you hold dear. Happy belated first-year anniversary to snk-notes!
For more rumours:Â 100Â Rumours Concerning the Recon Squad Leaders, Erwin Smith, & Dott Pixis
_______________
More Rumours Concerning Captain Levi
001)Â Captain Levi almost killed a person during one of his cleaning sprees.
002)Â Captain Levi almost killed Squad Leader Hanji during one of his cleaning sprees.
003)Â Captain Levi once disemboweled a guy with the remains of a broken teacup.
004) They say that Captain Levi joined the military only because Commander Erwin promised him a growth-spurt and used Squad Leader Mike as an example.
005)Â Captain Levi can't climb onto his own horse without assistance.
006)Â When Captain Levi visits the sick bay, infection rates drop by 30% immediately thereafter.
007)Â Captain Levi suffers from constipation. That's why he always looks the way he does.
008)Â Captain Levi suffers from constipation. That's why he's so obsessed with shit and shit jokes.
009)Â At the last Annual Military Summit, Captain Levi attempted to polish Commander Pixis' head with his cravat and nobody tried to stop him.
010) Captain Levi once won a horse in a card game.
012)Â Captain Levi once won a newly-wedded groom in a card game.
013)Â Captain Levi once saved Auruo Bossard from a life of indentured servitude in a card game.
014)Â Captain Levi beats stains into submission; he literally punches them and they're gone.
015)Â One time, Captain Levi cleaned the entire mess hall in his sleep.
016)Â Captain Levi can bench press Squad Leader Mike.
017)Â They say that Captain Levi once dick-punched a guy so hard that the unfortunate man became impotent and joined the Wall Cultists as a result.
018)Â Captain Levi is Mikasa Ackerman's fourth uncle, thrice removed.
019)Â The fabric of Captain Levi's cravat was hand-woven by a hundred virgins under the light of the new moon.
020)Â Every year, Captain Levi actually shrinks another millimeter in height.
_____
More Rumours Concerning Commander Erwin Smith
021)Â One time, Commander Erwin arrived at the Annual Military Summit on the back of a white stallion with a horn strapped to its head and all the Military Policemen were jealous.Â
022)Â One time, Commander Erwin and his entire entourage of Scouting Legion officers rode into Sina on top of a parade of white horses with horns strapped to their heads and all the Military Policemen were jealous.
023)Â They say that Commander Erwin is so prepared for any eventuality, he even trained himself to write using his feet.
024) They say that Commander Erwin is so prepared for any eventuality, he even trained himself to shave using his feet.
025)Â If you ever call Erwin Smith's bluff, you die.
026)Â If you never call Erwin Smith's bluff, you die.
027)Â Commander Erwin manscapes his eyebrows.
028) Commander Erwin's eyebrows are like Queens of the Night--they bloom only once a year.
029)Â Commander Erwin's eyebrows are detachable and come in five different shades of blond.
030)Â The Survey Corps emblem is actually a highly stylised representation of Commander Erwin's eyebrows.
031)Â Commander Erwin secretly named his eyebrows "Wings" and "Freedom."
032) One time, Commander Erwin wrote a letter of admiration to Captain Levi and signed it as from Chief Dawk.
033)Â For every tear that Commander Erwin sheds, a Wall Cultist is converted.
034)Â For every tear that Commander Erwin sheds, a Military Police officer gets laid.
035)Â Commander Erwin spends more time on his eyebrows than he does his hair.
036)Â Commander Erwin always writes out his speeches and practices them in front of a mirror before he delivers them.
037)Â One time, Commander Erwin was asked to deliver an impromptu speech at his Majesty's birthday gathering; they say he almost started a civil war right then and there.
038)Â Erwin Smith is a virgin.
039) Erwin Smith is a 40-year-old virgin.
040)Â Half of the rumours about Erwin Smith are spread by the man himself.
_____
More Rumours Concerning Squad Leader Mike Zakarius
041)Â Squad Leader Mike bleeds pheromones, not blood.
042)Â The most popular cologne in Inner Sina this season was reverse-engineered from Mike Zakarius's natural body odour.
043)Â The most popular perfume in Inner Sina this season was inspired by Mike Zakarius's tears.
044) Squad Leader Mike isn't called Humanity's Second Strongest merely because he's good at fighting Titans; it's because he used to routinely bully Captain Levi into submission by sitting on him.
045)Â If Squad Leader Mike sniffs you once, your chances of surviving your first encounter with Titan increase by 10%.
046)Â If Squad Leader Mike sniffs you twice, your chances of getting out of latrine duties increase by 10%.
047)Â If Squad Leader Mike sniffs you three or more times, you're due for a promotion, a good lay, death by Titan, or a combination of all three.
048)Â If Squad Leader Mike doesn't sniff you at all, it means your mother never loved you.
049)Â If Squad Leader Mike doesn't sniff you at all, it means you were adopted.
050)Â The reason why Squad Leader Mike is so good with horses is because he's part horse.
051)Â Mike Zakarius is part horse and hung like one too.
052)Â Mike Zakarius was raised by horses. In fact, his entire extended family resides in the Survey Corps' stables.
053)Â Squad Leader Mike enjoys smelling like expensive lady's perfume himself.
054)Â Squad Leader Mike is banned from most fine dining establishments because he always calls them out on their health-hazard violations.
055)Â Squad Leader Mike is allergic to roses.
056) Squad Leader Mike is more accurate at identifying a woman's state of pregnancy than contemporary pregnancy tests.
057)Â Mike Zakarius is actually the world's smallest, tamest, and best looking Titan.
058)Â Squad Leader Mike doesn't have a mere 6-pack; he has a 12-pack.
059)Â Mike Zakarius is technically 30% legs, 30% nose, 30% abs, and 10% 3D maneuver gear.
060)Â Actually, Mike Zakarius is 25% legs, 40% nose, 25% abs, 5% 3D maneuver gear, and 5% luscious golden hair.
_____
More Rumours Concerning Squad Leader Hange Zoe
061)Â Squad Leader Hange once went a week without bathing.
062)Â Squad Leader Hange once went one month without bathing. For Science.
063)Â Squad Leader Hange once bit Captain Levi (for Science) and said he tasted like those cutesy little cakes that go well with tea.
064) Squad Leader Hange once bit Squad Leader MIke (for Science) and said he tasted like Little Water with a side of smoked bacon.
065)Â Squad Leader Hange once bit Moblit Berner (for Science) and said he tasted like alcoholic chicken and stress.Â
066)Â Hange Zoe's glasses are just fashion statements and lack any sort of prescription.
067)Â They say that even the most hideous aberrant Titan will look vaguely attractive if viewed through Squad Leader Hange's glasses.
068) During her downtime, Squad Leader Hange writes trashy harlequin romance stories starring herself and her research subjects.
069)Â Squad Leader Hange pays her immediate subordinates in Vine brews and other assorted contraband.
070)Â Hange Zoe makes her assistant draw all sorts of deviant Titan erotica for her.
071) Hange Zoe is actually one half of a very popular Underground graphic novel duo specializing in stories of adventure, romance, and Titans.  Their works are super popular with Sina noblewomen and Dott Pixis.
072)Â Squad Leader Hange is the reason why there are such things as Titan-shaped sweet meats.
073)Â Squad Leader Hange's first kiss was with a Titan.
074)Â Squad Leader Hange once had to assist the Military Police with a murder suspect interrogation. They say the suspect confessed to everything 3 hours into her 12 hour lecture about yeast.
075)Â Sina Military Protocol lists "24 Hours with Hange Zoe on the Topic of Science" as a viable alternative to capital punishment.
076)Â Hange Zoe has a chess set where all the pieces are modeled after Titans and each and every piece has a personal name.
077)Â Hange Zoe discovered "coffee."
078)Â Hange Zoe invented "Titans."
079)Â Squad Leader Hange used to keep a wolfhound as a pet and fed it all sorts of experimental brews. Its name was Mike.
080)Â Half of the rumours about any and all military personnel are spread by Squad Leader Hange herself. For Science.
_____
Rumours Concerning Certain Members of the 104th Graduating Class
[Jean Kirschstein]
081)Â That isn't Jean Kirschstein's natural hair colour.
082)Â Jean Kirschstein doesn't even remember what his natural hair colour is supposed to be.
083) Jean Kirschstein learned all his best pick-up lines from popular Inner Sina romance novels.
084) One time Jean Kirschstein dressed up as Eren Jaeger; they say he looked better as Jaeger than Jaeger did himself.
[Sasha Braus]
085)Â Sasha Braus was voted by her classmates as "Most likely to turn to cannibalism if we were ever stranded in a place with no other edible wildlife, but at least she'd be better than a Titan, I guess."
086) Sasha Braus has eaten horse.
087)Â Sasha Braus has eaten Titan.
088)Â Sasha Braus is the reason why Instructor Shadis hates potatoes.
[Mikasa Ackerman]
089)Â Mikasa Ackerman's muffler is actually an prototype Anti-Titan personnel weapon developed by the Engineering Department.
090)Â Mikasa Ackerman has taken down Titans with nothing but a canister of gas and her red muffler.
091)Â The reason why Mikasa Ackerman's lips are so full and glossy is because she applies on a healthy layer of the blood of her enemies every morning.
092)Â Like Squad Leader Mike, Mikasa Ackerman is the proud owner of a 12-pack.
[Armin Arlert]
093)Â Armin Arlert is Commander Erwin's bastard lovechild.
094)Â Armin Arlert is the product of the government's most recent attempt to clone Erwin Smith.
095)Â If Armin Arlert screams "GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GIVE ME TITANS" in the key of A minor, Eren Jaeger or Mikasa Ackerman will come running to his aid within five minutes.
096) The reason why Armin Arlert's hair is so big is because it's full of secrets.
[Eren Jaeger]
097)Â Eren Jaeger still hasn't lost all his primary teeth.
098)Â Eren Jaeger is still teething; that's why he keeps gnawing on everything, including himself.Â
099)Â Eren Jaeger's special ability as a Titan is that he can grow a giant dick while in his Titan form.
100)Â The only part of his body Eren Jaeger cannot regrow is his dick.
Prior to the fall of Wall Maria, the Wall inhabitants probably had a lot more to celebrate for and with. Given the throwback nature of the society within the Walls, however, festivities and holidays probably correspond to astronomical/lunar/seasonal phenomena/political machinations. So while there isn't necessarily such a thing as âChristmasâ (or even Yule), the people do have a major winter holiday by celebrating the Winter Solstice. (âCongratulations on surviving another winter! An extra loaf of bread for all!â) And likewise, a major warm weather event would likely take place during the summer solstice as well. ("Hurray! The sun is shining, the day is damn long, and we're still alive! Vine for everybody! Even the kids, yes, you too little Pixis! You too.")
The government encourages such festivities--the secular ones at least--to keep the masses content/occupied. Â
Various sub-populations of the Wall inhabitants may have their own unique holidays as well, depending on the makeup of the collective heritage and/or local history. The Wall cultists may observe the day the Walls were completed as their religious new year (the date of which could be arbitrarily defined or could be passed down and actually be accurate, we may never know). The economics of Inner Sina may lend itself to some form of "Lovers' Day" or other commercially involved affair. And of course, the King's birthday would likely call for some mandatory celebration.
This is not discounting, of course, the possibility that most, if not all, major pre-Wall era holidays somehow survived to be passed down as antiquated traditions, then modified as times and needs saw fit. But not all major pre-Wall holidays are made equal. One festival in particular met its unfortunate end shortly after the fallout from the Colossal Titan's decision to lovingly introduce his foot to Wall Maria like a particularly large and steamy wrecking ball. Because while it may have been, once upon a time, perfectly harmless to dress up as the stuff nightmares are made of, after one too many incidents involving military veterans and hordes of children-sized Titans menacing them for sweetmeats, the government had to ultimately ban that particular tradition by royal decree.Â
((Thank you for this ask sparklecoyote! Would you believe this headcanon has been sitting in my drafts since last december? Because it has.))
You're too awesome to only post something once in, like, 500 years.. I understand very well that you're busy. /cries/ Just thought I should tell you how much I miss you.
Oh god, I am far from worthy, much less deserving of being missed. But thank you so much for being understanding and for such a sweet message! Seriously, it made my night when I first received it and continues to make me smile. I think I'll be a little more free this month to get caught up with fandom (fingers crossed! knock on wood!). And am definitely going to try harder to carve out time/motivation to produce more quality crack.
(Gestahlt and I already have something big planned, but since that initial brainstorming session some weeks ago, I've become the bottleneck where progress goes to die. Again. orz /guilt-trips into the sun.)
Tumblr was so kind to notify me via email as to what a terrible person I am and how I completely missed this blog's first year anniversary. And then this kind of happened.Â
Thanks for putting up with all the crack and ridiculousness and obscenely long stretches of radio-silence. <3
Headcanon: Erwin Is an Expert At Forging Signatures
Handwriting forgery was a skill he developed from a young age. First by learning to mimic his father's handwriting; then, those of his classmates'.
As Erwin grew older, he quickly realised the practical use of such a skill in the political arena and polished it to the point where he can now forge most writing styles and signatures of all the highest ranking government officials.
Erwin doesn't limit himself to only the penmanship of the aristocracy though. A man must practice to keep his skills sharp, and Erwin Smith is nothing if not a pragmatist.
Suffice to say, Erwin considers all his peers and subordinates to be fair game and quite often takes the liberty of responding to missives addressed to a recipient as the recipient. With or without the intended recipient's knowledge or consent (usually without).Â
This isn't a headcanon, I'm just wondering if this blog is still active. I love reading all your funny posts (as well as that of snk-headcanons) and would be really distraught if these two blogs died :( please keep up the amazing work; your fans are addicted to your crack :)
Right, itâs about time I addressed this.
Guys, Iâm really sorry about the abysmal lack of updates in this blog. The past few months have been incredibly busy for me IRL, and to be honest, while thereâs enough canon material for me to write about, I just havenât been hit by the right inspiration. I think my decided lack of ships for this fandom has contributed to my sudden writerâs block - itâs more difficult to lose creative juices when thereâs the power of shippy ~tru wub~ to keep lubricating you in the fucking stuff. People who follow me on my personal blog know that Iâve written a few things for the Free! fandom, and thatâs because I⊠ship a lot of things in there ahahaha. Not to say that actively shipping something is superior to not shipping anything because ITâS NOT; itâs just that sometimes, I can be a shameful fujoshi wreck, and porn is way easier to write than humour.
This isnât to say Iâve left SnK for Free! (never never never), itâs just that my writing mojo has been favouring the shippy variety lately, but I do believe itâll balance out eventually.
Also, @kirui and I havenât really found the time to go on an SnK brainstorming spree since our trip to SG last August, I believe (HOLY SHIT THATâS A LONG TIME AGO), and sheâs my main motivator in this fandom so⊠D:Â
I actually do have stuff lying around for the blog- I have about 5 different WIPs (one of which is Part 2 of 15 Orders from Erwin Smith that Levi Rephrased for Maximum Effect); itâs just that I canât seem to wrap them up in the way I want to. The thing is, I refuse to post for the sake of posting; I really donât want to give you guys less than what youâre used to seeing from me. But I am trying.
So anon, to answer your question: NO, THIS BLOG IS NOT DEAD. I REPEAT: IT IS NOT DEAD. THINK OF IT AS A VOLCANO: IT IS DORMANT FOR NOW, BUT WHEN INSPIRATION FINALLY STRIKES, ITâLL BE A MEGASPLOSION OF KRAKATOA LEVELS.
~ Gestahlt
PS: Iâve written some sort of humorous, parody-like commentary on the latest chapter of SnK, summarized as âHumanity is Well and Truly Fucked Because Eren Jaeger Canât Get Hard and Fill A Hole; Let Me Explain To You How.â Is anyone interested in reading it?
PPS: If you guys can link me to motivational Scouting Legion Veterans related shenanigans of any sort (fic, art, meta, etc) that would be super awesome.
So, ignoring the fact that snk-noteâs PSA was posted over a month ago (shhh), Iâm just going to take this opportunity to piggy-back on it before I truly go underground. Because I couldnât have put it better myselfâ
Am first echoing the apologies for the long bout of radio silence. Youâre all here for SnK crack, so I wonât bore you too much with details, but long story short: I was added in January onto a case thatâs been culminating to a truly monstrous 3-week minimum trial, set to kick off in a little more than a week. These days I literally have no life, much less time outside of work, to churn those creative juices. Iâm still keeping up with the manga and spin-offs. I get the most infernal and untimely urges of wanting to make a gag doujin. And I feel terrible that itâs taken me this long to even attempt a coherent PSA.
However, like Gestahlt, I also refuse to post for the sake of posting. That being said, I have more half-started headcanons, fics, and comic scripts in my draft-folder than Iâm comfortable with just leaving there unfinished. Iâve even started another batch of Rumours (Levi makes it too easy). There are even a bunch of asks that I have yet to answer (IâM SO SORRY ITâS TAKING ME THIS LONG OTL). And though the months since keep increasing, I am absolutely going to put together that Attack on Singapore post.Â
In short, this blog is not dead. Itâs just resting. Call it a hiatus if you must, but it will be back with more crack after April.Â
Cheers!
- kirui
p.s. Contrary to Gestahlt (it doesnât happen often), Iâve finally settled onâand wholly and unabashedly embracedâa pairing of choice for this fandom. But worry not, all content will continue to be gen or open-ended free-for-all for maximum crack purposes.
Do you have any headcanons about other members of the 104th like Bert, Connie, and Sasha?
I do have headcanons for some of the other 104th squadrons actuallyâusually involving childhood shenanigans. (I love shenanigans. I mean, just imagine the variations of trouble Eren, Mikasa, and Armin most likely got into as wee kids, or the magical journey Sasha went through to become a baller teenage hunter. Dude, Sasha foraging in the woods and learning whatâs edible, whatâs not edible, and what will get you higher than the Walls.)
But the truth is, most of those headcanons have been/are probably heavily influenced by  fandom-hivemind already so I usually just donât bother. And besides, I still find it infinitely easier to headcanon for older, supporting characters with spotty pasts. And the really simplified reason why: with characters that have less room for more character growth, thereâs less of a chance of being completely jossed.Â
ETA:Â I do feel compelled to expand on that Sasha headcanon though. When I manage to wrestle away more time from work. One thought leads to another and, well, Honey Badger. I'll leave it at that for now.
i FIGURED I SHOULD POP ON AND TELL YOU. Because Marco isn't dead. The corpse Jean found belonged to someone else.
Oh, I think Iâve actually seen the massive theory post that really advances that belief! Alas, his on-screen death (or, if you will, the very convincing insinuation of his demise) happened before my brain drew the protective lines that make up my NO-MORE-DEATHS-BEYOND-THIS-POINT headcanon sandbox.
I suppose Marcoâs fate is one that I refuse to speculate on because the rest of the fandom has made such a good argument for one outcome already. I liked Marco as a characterâhe was impressively fleshed out for what little screen/page-time he got, and he was an excellent comrade and foil to the rest of his fellow trainees. Regardless, Marco doesnât really feature too much in my headcanons, so Iâm content with believing either way, until Isayama dictates otherwise.
I have a really sad headcannon: When Marco was alive, Jean liked make constellations out of his freckles, just like the ones in the sky. After Marco died, whenever Jean sees the sky at night, he has to excuse himself or else he'll brake down crying in front of everyone.
Why would you share this anon. Such sad. So pain. No.
Let me fix that for you:
((Begin headcanon))
Marco is at heart a romantic of sorts, and often enjoyed star-gazing. When Jean found out that Marco liked to star-gaze, he wasted no time in procuring semi-permanent ink with which to vandalise Marco's face while he slept. With Armin's help, Jean was able to map out no less than 3 major constellations on Marco's freckles.
... and if one of the constellations ended up looking remarkably phallic, well, that's only because Armin told him to connect the wrong stars before realising his mistake, okay.Â
{I'm probably a little late to the party but in the post with all Mike's girlfriends, is that a Mambo No. 5 reference I see? I cannot get the image of Mike in a pinstriped suit and fedora out of my head now!}
I canât remember if we ever did make an official announcement (probably not?), but yes indeed, anon, that was a Mambo No. 5 reference.  Gestahlt and I have a questionable habit of slipping in modern day pop culture references as easter eggs. :â) Sometimes itâs just more convenient and fun than coming up with new names and all that jazz.
Speaking of jazzâMike would rock a fedora. And pinstripes. And braces/suspenders. Hot damn son, just give him an alto sax to go with.
sugurugetos
origamiaround
izzy806
stormborns
snowghoul
dailybridgerton
germansingergirl
