My World

How the world appears in my eyes as I fight against the night.

[sohyejin]

I'm starting to like it here. Even though the struggle is real, but I'm starting to get the hang of it. And this is the view of the city from the top of a tall building. It's Daejeon. (at Daejeon)

[sohyejin]

Somebody out there is waiting for you to appear in their life. It's funny to know that somebody that will love you is either one of the unknown faces in the crowd or someone that has been by your side the whole time.

[sohyejin]

Men's biggest secret lies within their tears; they cry when they lose someone they love the most, tear up when they're happy to see the woman of their life, drop tears when they feel alone in hardship. And the most important thing, they show it only to themselves - when they're alone. And if you're that somebody that causes his tears, it means you are more than just a 'somebody' in their life.

[sohyejin]

"The show was fantastic; people were enjoying the festival, couples are laughing in excitement, singles are dancing in hopes they would find somebody to love. So many laughters and smiles that were contagious. But I felt different. Behind those smiles, I saw a pair of eyes wishing to capture the view longer. Behind those laughters, hidden hopes of staying longer in the moment was obvious. Some of those people who were laughing, secretly saving their tears from wishing the moment would last, the time would stop for a while. Then I stared at you, thanking God for the chance of holding your hands, every minute, every hour, every day. I am grateful that this time has finally come - the time where I don't need to send you away in a flying jetplane, the time where airports stop being my reason to cry. Since then, I begin to love festivals." (Short Story of GOODBYE FAREWELL)

[sohyejin]

"The show was fantastic; people were enjoying the festival, couples are laughing in excitement, singles are dancing in hopes they would find somebody to love. So many laughters and smiles that were contagious. But I felt different. Behind those smiles, I saw a pair of eyes wishing to capture the view longer. Behind those laughters, hidden hopes of staying longer in the moment was obvious. Some of those people who were laughing, secretly saving their tears from wishing the moment would last, the time would stop for a while. Then I stared at you, thanking God for the chance of holding your hands, every minute, every hour, every day. I am grateful that this time has finally come - the time where I don't need to send you away in a flying jetplane, the time where airports stop being my reason to cry. Since then, I begin to love festivals." (Short Story of GOODBYE FAREWELL)

[sohyejin]

"There she went again, daydreaming -staring at nothing across her table. Her deep blue eyes were vacant, she laid her chin over her palm; thinking. I'm wondering what's on her mind, what crossed her pretty little mind that she was silent. Whatever it is, it might be a precious one because she seemed unentertained without it. Then, she caught my presence -standing across the road, peeking inside the cafe. Then an enchanting beautiful smile emerges. The vacancy, daydream and doubt that bothered her vanished in a second. And just right at that moment, I knew, it was me she was waiting for. I witnessed how her life looked like without me. So, that's the stort of how I married her." (Short story of "HER")

[sohyejin]

"She used to sit there every Wednesday afternoon before lunch. First, I was attracted to her deep-green eyes. Second, I got myself drowned in the way she smiled over some words in the book. Then, soon I fell in love with her presence. Days pass by until I get the chance to sit here again, mourning over the news. I never knew a sight could be this painful. I've lost you even before I get the chance to know you." (Short-story of FAREWELL BEFORE HELLO)

[sohyejin]

True Love

Oh, what a true love! An affair between man and a woman; Breaking sweat to make her smile; Breaking bones to keep her smile;

Oh, what a true love! An affair between sir and a lady; Breaking tongues to win a battle; Breaking lips to lose a pride;

Oh what a true love! An affair between lass and a lad; Saving tears from wasting; Saving hearts from breaking;

Oh what a true love! He feels insanely exhausted But has no strength to let her go Oh… A true image of true love

[sohyejin]

“Your beauty is captivating, and I always capture it with naked eyes. Because cameras break, but memories don’t. And you’ll always live in my memory.” - G.

[sohyejin]

Infinite answer

These feet are stepping on the wrong lines Between right and wrong, True and false; Sea and sand; Sun and moon; Between black and white;

Shall I be gray? Shall I be noon? Shall I be falsely true? Shall I be a wild thorn on an enchanting rose?

I never know No strength to join the light Too tired to touch the darkness Just searching for an answer An infinite answer

[sohyejin]

“Listening to you feels like a toss of wave in the ocean; refreshing, yet so hard. You’re an enchanting melody with wondrous lyrics and beautiful instruments, yet a loud chorus.” - E.

[sohyejin]

“I don’t know why tea exists; but I think I have to thank the inventor. Because through a cup or two, I get to understand you.” - D.

[sohyejin]

Sometimes

The D-day is getting near. In less than 50 days, I’m going to start another season in my life. Knowing that I no longer live by myself is such a surprising idea that gives me bliss. I no longer have to wake up alone, later that I’d get to live with him, I no longer have to touch my phone. Nobody to spend hours to talk through calls with, families are exception. But at the other end, it also gives me fear.

I have a new responsibility. I have somebody to take care of, to talk to, to look at. It’s not a bad thing, but the time I officially realize that I will lose a big portion of my freedom, I got worried. I’m no longer responsible for myself. I’m responsible for another person. And soon might be for another little people that will appear to be a part of our family.

It gets me question; am I actually ready?

But then again, life has never been waiting for me to be ready. It just happens until I realize that I apparently am ready for it. It will take 100 years if I waited for myself to be ready.

Sometimes, the only way to know whether you’re ready or not for a big decision, is just by doing it; to make the decision. Sometimes, things turn out to be better than you thought. Sometimes, its never as worst as you thought it was.

But back again, it’s only sometimes. And at the other time, I don’t feel like it. And even though it’s hard to believe, I have to welcome myself to a new part of  life called ‘adulthood’.

[sohyejin]

“Sometimes it’s hard to communicate with you. When I laugh, your lips don’t move; when I speak, you daydream; when I’m lost in anger, you start a battle. You made two cups of coffee but I end up holding mine, sitting alone and staring at the still water. But still, I’d rather lose words than losing you.” - C.

[sohyejin]

“Did you get the letters I sent you? I can finally see your smile emerges through the open window. I know it’s hard to believe, but I’m finally home for Christmas.” - B.

Photo by Victoria Heath on Unsplash

[sohyejin]

“Let’s make love like there’s no tomorrow. 24-hours in bed, talking, touching, chatting, arguing. Sighing, mourning, groaning, yelling through the night. Then we’d wake up 5 in the morning, walking like half-dead mummy looking for a soul. We’d be hungry, but in love.” - A

Picture by : Pietro De Grandi

[sohyejin]

I'm just a problem that doesn't want to be solved.

Fall Out Boy, Novocaine