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@solaceds
#solaceds , penned by violet , twenty four , she/her .
dash only , medium to low activity but open to writing with any of my mutuals . i typically will follow back .
⤳ test subjects . wishlist . ( this blog is a work in progress because i'm unprepared 🙂↕️ )
🪶 / in the source link below, you’ll gain access to #303 gifs of bella hadid in ramy, s03e03-04,10 (2022), next in fashion, s02e06 (2021), and youtube videos. she was born in the year 1996 and is of palestinian and white descent, so please cast appropriately when using my resources. all of these gifs were made from scratch, so you may edit these as much as you’d like, but please don’t redistribute or claim as your own. please refer to my rules for further information.
note: this pack is completely free and is also accessible through a zip file.
this is a birthday present for @madelyncilne! happy halfway to 50!
BLOCK ME OUT 2022, dir. Arianna Shooshani
╰ * ◞ › 𝑝𝑎𝑙𝑜𝑚𝑎 , 𝑗𝑡 . ╱ 𝐬𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐬 !
hearing her footsteps inch closer to the door, jt thought that this was his absolute last chance to run. he could just hide to the side of the building, pretend it was just a ding dong ditch and leave her alone forever. or he could stand there, take her anger and pain, and try to come back to the one person that always believed in him. he didn’t want to cause more pain to her, he loved her. he still loves her. but if he loved her so much, why would he come back here and bring the all the pain and tainted memories back to her? for all he knew, she could’ve already moved on. she would’ve already found the perfect guy to replace the empty space in her bed that jt used to fill. she was the most perfect girl ever and already knew men fell at her feet. how couldn’t they? she was beautiful and smart and the kindest person ever. if he had been any other person and found out she was single, he would’ve swooped in and tried to replace the guy that broke her. but instead, he was the one that did the breaking. he was about to turn right around when the door swung open, marley’s eyes connecting with his. his mouth agape, he looked away, not wanting to see how she would look at him. he could already hear the venom shooting out of her voice, he wouldn’t be able to bear the disgust and hatred in her eyes that she must’ve had for him. he tucked his hand in his soaking wet jean pockets, completely forgetting that this was absolutely the worst setting to make this type of confrontation to. ‘ i– i just thought we could talk or something. ’ that wasn’t exactly true, he did have an ulterior motive for being here. but maybe if in the end, if he could try, he wanted to talk to her about them. maybe win her back and they could go back to how it used to be. he looked up at her finally, seeing the anguish that filled her face. she looked good otherwise, she hadn’t been wallowing anymore like he was. peeking inside quickly from the doorway, her house didn’t display any of the small items and knickknacks jt had failed to grab before he fled. she was moving on or had already. she didn’t want or need him around. ‘ this was dumb, i think i should go. just forget you saw me or something. ’
it’s no shocker to anyone that marley’s somewhat of a hopeless romantic , viewing anything & anyone through rose-colored lenses —— for so long , she’s attempted to convince herself that that was the culprit in her & jt’s relationship , seeing the good in him that never existed . except , it’s far from the truth . no matter how much she yearns to despise him for shattering the confinements of her heart without so much as caring who would gather the remnants , she can’t . jt would always be something to marley that nobody else could possibly compare to , & it’s what she’s eventually learnt to live with , even if he hadn’t felt the same way . if anything , it’s clear that he doesn’t , because there’s no alternate universe where she’d leave him the way he had — just one text , no communication afterwards , nothing . the pouring rain surrounding the twosome isn’t helping much either , reminiscent to every single romance movie that the femme’s been drawn to for as long as she can remember . but this is reality , & for some reason unbeknownst to her , every single phrase she’s rehearsed for the potential notion that jt would visit her again has vanished from her mind . she’s watching the male's lips move as he begins speaking but it’s barely processing , jaw remaining slightly slack from his unannounced presence . & before she can even respond to his words , he’s pulling away & turning on his heels to make his barely inconspicuous exit . ‘ don’t , jt ! ’ out of instinct , sylphlike fingertips grasp onto his damp wrist . ‘ you don’t get to come back in my life & leave again , you can’t . it’s not fucking fair to me . ’ hazel-flecked optics are trained on his & she’s swallowing thickly to remedy the growing lump within the cage of her throat . she knows it’s raining & she needs to grant him access to her home , but not yet . not until she knows exactly what he wants from her that he hadn’t already taken . ‘ do you know how many times i thought about this ? you showing up here . for months , i pictured this moment & to this day , i have no idea what’s left to say . but you wanna talk , so talk to me . what do you want , jt ? ’
We were like a summer song in December. So good but so wrong. Timing, love’s arch enemy.
The Myriad (via evakwrites)
╰ * ◞ › 𝑎𝑚𝑒𝑙𝑖𝑎 . ╱ 𝐬𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐬 !
it wasn’t like amelia wanted to be here, not when he was here was with some stupid girl that didn’t know robby like she did, ESPECIALLY not with his stupid friend that only seemed to go to her when robby stopped showing interest for her for three seconds. but she knew he would be here and seeing her with someone else, especially his own friend, would drive him insane. she wasn’t going to lose at their little secret game of cat and mouse any longer, if she could even call it that. they were friends but there had always seemed to be something there. amelia would never admit it and would swear up and down she didn’t get a pang in her chest the minute she saw robby swooning another girl at parties. it wasn’t a crush, she just wanted his attention. they were friends after all and each other’s constants and that’s all it was. he knew that too, right? but as she stood in front of him in a desolate room they could manage to wrangle from random party goers, he genuinely seemed hurt? ‘ what are you even going on about ? you’re literally here with someone else too, i don’t know what you have to not like about it? ’ rolling her eyes, she glanced over at the door, hoping none of their dates barged in looking for either of them. it was already weird having to answer question from friends who noticed the obvious tension they had under normal circumstances, she couldn’t bear to have to explain this to anyone. ‘ you’re disgusting, he did not. th- this is crazy and ridiculous. he’s your FRIEND, and a good guy at that. and also my date who i need to be getting back to. if i do recall, you have someone out there that you invited here, too. shouldn’t you be focusing on her instead of what i’m doing? ’
maybe if robby hadn’t carried the characteristics of a badly-tempered five year old & an eighty year old somehow simultaneously , then he’d be amelia’s type . granted , he doesn’t necessarily showcase how much he feels for her until she’s with someone else , but he doesn’t understand why she doesn’t see it ; unspoken words translated into how he looks at her when she crinkles her nose & laughs at one of his horribly puerile jokes —— more often than not , he’ll gladly make a fool of himself ( not that it wasn’t second nature to robby ) to hear that damn laugh , but of course , when their peers mention his inkling of his long-standing crush on amelia , his brain short-circuits into an immediate form of denial . however , now that they’re here , he doesn’t think he carries the will to hide it anymore , & with how he’s managing to crawl under her skin , there’s a certain feeling looming above them that tonight may be the night where they finally lay every single thing on the table . ‘ oh , so because robert the ass-picker is my friend , that makes it okay that he’s going out with you ? ’ he asks incredulously , attempting to keep his voice level due to the fact that this was a party , after all , & the last thing they needed was another interruption . robby’s a hypocrite , there’s nobody who’s wholly aware of that more than him , though it doesn’t aid the pang in his chest when she mentions they both have dates they should be making their return to . in truth , the fact that he even had a date had slipped past the depths of his boyish mind , but he doesn’t want to give amelia the satisfaction of forwarding that confession to her , doesn’t want the confirmation that his feelings were more than likely one-sided & lose her as a friend forever . ‘ i’m focused on my date just fine , amelia , thanks , ’ he murmurs , tone dripped in his usual sarcasm , ‘ no , you know what ? i can’t focus on her , not when he’s all over you & you’re not stopping him , amelia . i mean , you like this kid ? really ? ’
╰ * ◞ 𝑩𝑨𝑺𝑬𝑫 𝑶𝑵 𝑻𝑯𝑰𝑺 —— : for @svaturns !
‘ i don’t LIKE this . seeing you with him . ’ it’s almost laughable , the utter taste of dissatisfaction that’s left on his tongue after admitting his jealousy towards the other . it’s not as though it hadn’t been blatantly obvious , not when robby’s eyes had been trained on the pair all night , considering it pure luck that he’d even managed to rope her out from the throngs of chattering party goers & finding solace in an empty room with her . granted , they were only friends & sure , he had a date , too ( who robby definitely abandoned ) , but he thinks it doesn’t count , given the fact that the sole reason he’d asked some random girl out in the first place was to test if her feelings mirror his own . ‘ seriously , robert , of all people ? i’m pretty sure i saw him pick his fucking wedgie when you weren’t looking , & you’re still going out with him . robert . ’
╰ * ◞ › 𝑝𝑎𝑙𝑜𝑚𝑎 , 𝑗𝑡 . ╱ 𝐬𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐬 !
closed starter for @solaceds based on this
the scattered street lights illuminated the rain and scattered lightning that came from the dark midnight sky as jt walked down the familiar sidewalk. he had walked it a thousand times before, going to this exact destination that he used to think of as his home. but it was this one time, he felt his nerves kick in more than usual. it had been months since he could bring himself to stroll down this block, avoiding actively even to drive by. he hadn’t been able to manage walking by marley’s house, scared of one day her walking out while he stalked about. he didn’t think he could face her after what he did–packing up his belongs with a terribly scribbled noted that just read ‘i can’t do this anymore, see ya.’ he knew he had hurt her from her hundreds of calls and texts, the times his mother came to see him after marley had reached out to her for help. it was to no avail though, he had made up his mind that night. so it was surprising that he could even fathom to walk down to her house again, knowing what her exact reaction would be the moment she saw him. not only because it’s the dead of night, but because it’s him. he didn’t deserve forgiveness or even the chance to speak to her. he had left the only person he thought he could see a future with, all because he was so fucked up in the head and thought she would see who he really was and leave him. he never thought he would see her again, she would move on with her life and have a family like she always wanted. and he would’ve been stuck with the what if’s. but he missed her and he wanted to be able to mend things, even if it meant he had to let her go again. he came up to her front door way finally, huffing out one last sigh. this was his last chance, he thought. he reached out and knocked on the door, praying she was awake.
for the most part , the aching wound within the confinements of marley’s chest that jt had left behind with no remorse had healed ; with copious amounts of sweets to satiate the endless hole within her , loyal friends that had given her the push to at the very least , go outside & inhale the fresh , filtered air nature had to offer rather than the four walls of her bedroom , things had finally began molding back into place for her . despite how impossible it all feels , marley was somewhat on the road to acceptance in the fact that the twosome weren’t meant to be like she so desperately yearned for him to be . it’s nearing midnight as a sudden knock stirs her awake from where she’s dozed off on the couch , an incredibly corny 2000s rom com playing lowly on her tv serving as the only form of luminescence within the vicinity of her home , confusion immediately flitting across her countenance . she surely wasn’t expecting any company , & even if she was , a text sent her way would’ve been a nice courtesy . with bated breath , she’s hoisting herself up , wiping the sleep from azure optics as she mindlessly swings the door open . however , when it’s jt standing in the threshold , the blonde’s convinced that this was some sort of twisted nightmare , & the pain that radiates throughout her entire stature is a physical reminder that this was real , & he was really here . ‘ ... jt ? what are you doing here ? ’ she chokes out , unable to conceal the animation upon features , though her shock is quick to morph into anger ; anger because even after all this time , her heart still manages to quicken in pace just at the sight of him . ‘ why are you here ? ’
i promise i’ll get to ims soon i literally just got home a half hour ago and i’m wiped OUT omg
thnderclouds·:
O P E N!
‘ NO. no — i get it. ’ the brunette spoke, words falling from his lips at a whisper-like tone. ‘ if this is what you want then… that’s f i n e with me. ’ he could feel himself sinking further and F U R T H E R into a state of sorrow, he has nothing left to hang on to. ‘ i understand. ’ he stated as thoughts ran in circles through his head, trying to figure out where this had come from; WHY it was happening.
she can’t even muster the courage to l o o k him in the eyes , opting for plucking at loose threads that lay upon the fabric of her shirt . this was for the best , she told herself . the sooner the pair accepted that they were doomed from the start , maybe the wound would heal in a timely manner . however , it was easier said than done when she didn’t believe that sentiment herself . ‘ he wants to give our relationship another chance , and to stop wasting my time with you . so , that’s what i’m doing — it’s what i want to do . ’ lie , ‘ i’m sorry , i just ... i LOVE him . ’ lie.
