I just try not to think about it too hard

chimera-collective -> sophomore-slump-system it/its pfp/banner: I saw the tv glow (2024)

[sophomore-slump-system]

Name list(in order of preference):

Raúl

Bambi

Marisol

Emiliano

Traumagenic DID system. 👍Mutuals can ask for our pluralspace👍

[Considering that we do tend to talk a lot about our system experiences, as well as reflect said experiences in our stories and hcs; if you're curious to know more about did (as well dissociative disorders in general), you can read more about it here.]

Main is @ominousbluejay.

userboxes credit here

blinkies credit here

Super duper awesome tagging system

#it's the constant companions — when we get bored and start posting our super duper awesome system hcs for characters on here instead of our main. Or to reblog system character hcs. 👍

#bambi is screaming at the sky - vents

#deer in the lake — deer posting. Deer. They’re awesome.

#the answers are in the coffin underground — ask tag. yay.

#systems at 25:00 — n25 system hcs specifically las criaturas have taken over my life

#a tv's musings — normal posts that aren’t vents

#the implications (ena torment nexus edition) — hitting ena in the shins with my traumas then standing there in horror as I realize the game itself carries implications that aren't really fun to think about and could also theoretically support certain traumas I project onto ena. Both for the fics written about said implications and just general projection I don’t know how to explain it uhhh .projection with text evidence to support it (to an extent) okay okay. you wanna know what the implications are? well uh. here ^^ anyways. I guess this is also just a coping mechanism // comfort fic type of thing except I’m walking in circles searching for catharsis through fiction because any time I find something my brain goes “no fuck you amnesia time” and thus recovery reset. They trapped me in a time loop .I’m a self inflicted time traveler. The homura of c-ptsd recovery

#the artist's thinly veiled dissonance between its memories and its selves - art tag. for when we want to post art on here rather than main bc main is scary for some of us

#to the world and everything in it: [i love you] - Z.A.T.O. tag. I love you. I love you. I love you.

#the crescent moon is laughing at us - my silly pjsk x iron lung au except it's all nightcordlings except it's specifically mainly putting ena in the blood ocean

[?]

[sophomore-slump-system]

I tripped over some boxes and died

[sophomore-slump-system]

Kinda wish I wasn’t exploding and getting mauled by a million knives mentally rn. I had plans for the summer, creative goals and shit. Instead I’ve been spending most of it bedrotting and trying not to let the nightmare lsd dream simulator kill me

[sophomore-slump-system]

I will. I will not gamble. for bloomfest ena. I will save. I am strong-willed. We can save. We WILL save. We will not gamble. We will not-

[puppiegracie]

I'm your favorite mutuals tolerated mutual

[wretchedwomenblorbos]

Holding my blorbo up by the scruff of her neck to show her to you

[sophomore-slump-system]

Sigh

[sophomore-slump-system]

Dios. Dios. Por favor. Por favor

[sophomore-slump-system]

Yeah we lost

[sophomore-slump-system]

Fuck

[sophomore-slump-system]

FUCK

[sophomore-slump-system]

Colombia colombia dos goles mas dos goles

[sophomore-slump-system]

It's been a pleasure being colombian with all of you

[sophomore-slump-system]

We're so fucked. We're so fuckedddd.

[sophomore-slump-system]

Yeah I don't think we're winning this one it's been a pleasure being colombian with all of you

[sophomore-slump-system]

It's been a pleasure being colombian with all of you

[sophomore-slump-system]

We're so fucked. We're so fuckedddd.

[sophomore-slump-system]

Okay I've been thinking about it, and I do really believe that a canon-adjacent enasys can work, even with the headcount I have for them in mind (some changes to the background/origin of some alters for the revised enasys hc below, not much else has changed tbh):

Basically in childhood living with emotional neglect incarnate is probably not very good, so I think initially what would happen for this goes more along the lines of "child starts imagining a version of themselves that can (supposedly) handle anything/take care of the child bc parent is being neglectful in some way shape or form and oh okay turns out that's not the best coping mechanism there's Another Person here," with the brain making a save file of baby enanan who. is a baby(toddler age idk 8 at most). and wants her father's love and attention but uh oh turns out when your vulnerability and sensitivity is looked down upon and the only way you really are able to connect with your father is via art and about nothing else. Yeah one may never grow up and always feel some sort of loneliness that forms in the heart of an emotionally neglected child while the other bases her identity on being the daughter of an artist which will for sure not be completely shattered ever

And you know for a while things aren't like as convoluted or chaotic or horrible as they could be, just a bit of a somewhat antagonistic accidental tag-team type of thing(I'll illustrate an example of this later on). Until Shinei fucks up during the end of middle school. Which is a hugeee guttural punch to both bebe ena and Ena(tm)

and then everything goes to shit

and along the way the selfie account thing happens

Stress + Developing addiction + Actually stress is an understatement what do you do when both your dream and worth and identity itself has been crushed and spat on and while you try to continue drawing literally the only thing that is really giving you any sense of worth is the eyes of thousands of strangers online looking at a middle schooler's selfies = another alter (thinking of changing his name later on but for now we can call her enanan)

Oh boy I hope there's not a rapid cycle of split after split during this period of the worst moment's during ena's life

(Hc timeline) and then there's another, because quite frankly no one in enasys was made to handle or even process the trauma of being groomed. Mainly because no one should ever know what that feels like or the damage but also considering that in this timeline now the source of trauma is also for a while the only source of self-worth and a survival mechanism....and honestly the only way to deal with the sheer emotional and mental dissonance to just survive requires the compartmentalization of either memories, emotions, or both. So now there's another (new name pending, fawn still works for now)

Does Ena (tm) realize? No I think during this time it wouldn't be like, exactly difficult to chalk it all up to. Idk a very weird and dark time that she'd rather not dwell on. And nothing more 👍

Bebe ena either went dormant after all of that or Ena (tm) purposefully repressed her along all of the other childhood moments because. well. You see. Pain

And then she meets n25 and meets Kanade and

Kanade introject of course. Every enasys must have at least one kanade on their shoulder (K).

And yeah characterization wise and dynamics wise not much changes from our og enasys idea. I just changed a bit of the background to make it more canon adjacent as an attempt to distance myself from the blatant projection in the og idea. For my own sanity

Okay I lied there's a major change aside from background/origins. New alter for them.

So you see, in my mind anytime someone acts (especially method acts cough cough the blonde one cough cough), there's a 50% chance that Hatsune Miku herself decides to hit them with the introject bat for funsies (serious medical answer ig: a "fragmented" mind is more likely to further split into other "fragments." Usually due to stress, but there are cases where the brain just loves tomfuckery). Tsukasa has either an alter who is a sort of amalgamation of all the characters he has method acted, or just. A bunch of characters running around his head. Rui...Uh...*Vaguely gestures at rui5.* Ena had a weird migraine after the garden of nightmares event, things get a bit uh blurry, so to say, and then the migraine is just gone after a few hours! Wait, why did the headcount go up...

I am still working on their characterization and dynamics tbh. I don't want their personality to be on par with the maniacal energy of the wd queen ena, that's probably why I chose the untrained here. I want her personality to be more akin to the character within the play itself, the shadow girl who does not have a name, but I've been subconsciously referring to her as Shadow Allier because I'm uncreative. I'll update this as I continue working on it.

[sophomore-slump-system]

It's been a pleasure being colombian with all of you

[sophomore-slump-system]

My body is a machine that wants me dead

[sophomore-slump-system]

New fic idea: Ena Shinonome learns to just try to idk live with functional seizures and Functional Neurological Disorder why because. because why not. Actually everyone in n25 now has their traumas either trigger or make physical issues worse. Mafuyu has forever Tummy Aches + Chronic Migraines + something related to her chest pain. I do think that if it were literal then uh That's Probably Not Normal. Kanade has a lot of autoimmune disorders and some were triggered and some were exacerbated by the trauma + several several deficiencies. Mizuki has fibromyalgia + ME/CFS. Ena has FND and the most frequent symptom is the functional seizures + something chronic pain related. I will write about this when my everything hurts a bit less