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@soulfuldestinations
nana jacqueline averi jumpsuit ♡
i'm incredibly torn emotionally. My heart burns so much. I genuinely am hurting incredibly so much uncontrollably.
This break up is awful. My family dynamics is just... terrible. I'm seeing my sister again today after not seeing her for probably 6 months, same fucking shit.
My job is draining and my last day is supposedly next week.
A man telling you you’re hot is not a compliment. A compliment is him wanting to marry you, take care of you and respect you.
A man wanting to marry you is not a compliment. Getting a man to marry you is not even difficult.
A lot of men get married for convenience. A man can take care of you, and not really love you. A man can seemingly respect you, but doing a lot of things you don’t know about behind your back. You can even just be manipulated to believing they do.
Aside from that, your life should not revolve around a man wanting you, period. Live for yourself. That’s how you’re going to find a man that’s genuinely going to want to marry, respect and care about you. And those women in that position, aren’t seeing any of these things as a compliment, just as expectations. It’s not a compliment that someone treats you good when you expect no less. It’s a standard.
Anyone telling you that you are hot, is giving you a compliment. And serves the purpose of a compliment. The problem is when we crave it so bad that we build up all of these feelings and ideas around compliments. Compliments are not proposals or an indication that the person has feelings or even genuine good intentions for you. Take it at face value and let people prove themselves to you.
To end, remember that you are more than your looks 💗
The people who have truly thrived in their pursuits did so because they embraced their individuality. They didn't copy others; they carved their own paths. So, instead of striving to duplicate someone else's style, focus on crafting your own. Trying to copy will only lead to achieving limited success, if any.
Authenticity is key. Stay true to your identity and the value you bring. Your journey to success is unique. What brings success to you might be different from what brings success to someone else. Each person has their own recipe for success.
Imitation is not sustainable. Trying to be a replica of someone else will eventually be found out. People can tell when something is genuine and when it's not and those who have achieved success are able to easily recognize ingenuity. Embrace your uniqueness. Your genuine efforts and originality will be your strongest assets on your path to success.
Stop being scared to ask for what you want in life because another person that isn’t, is going to come around and take it.
Whatever you think you can't do, someone else is confidently doing it wrong right now and people are paying them for it. Someone is getting the things they want just because they asked for it. They didn't worry about deserving it, they didn't try to prove themselves. They just went for it. They are getting recognition for it. They are solidifying themselves as the go to or expert in that space. They are achieving what they want to achieve because they are not scared of looking dumb, or wrong.
Stop walking on egg shells when it comes to your life. Your wants and your needs. You deserve everything you want and have to believe that it can be yours.
30 Heal Your Inner Child Affirmations 🧸🍭💛✨
I am worthy of love and acceptance.
My feelings are valid and important.
I forgive my past and embrace my present.
I am deserving of happiness and joy.
I am safe and protected.
I trust the journey of healing.
My inner child is resilient and strong.
I am in control of my life now.
I release old wounds and embrace healing.
I am enough, just as I am.
I deserve to be treated with kindness and respect.
I am capable of creating a life I love.
I am surrounded by love and support.
I am proud of who I am becoming.
I am deserving of all good things.
I am healing more and more every day.
I am open to receiving love and care.
I am connected to my inner wisdom.
I am free from the burdens of my past.
I am brave and courageous.
I am deserving of inner peace.
I am in charge of my own happiness.
I am worthy of trust and understanding.
I am loved for who I am.
I am constantly growing and evolving.
I am deserving of a life filled with joy.
I am a beacon of light and hope.
I am deserving of comfort and security.
I am in a continuous process of healing.
I am embracing my inner child with love and compassion.
october 3, 2023. Therapy Post/ Self-Growth/Self-Improvement.
This weekend was awful, and this year has been bad.
Adrian and I broke up.I'm incredibly sad, but I think perhaps it was for the best. I do not the discount the possibility of us ever being together down the line in our lives, but that would require accountability from his part towards me, me towards him, me being physically better, and spiritually, and just at a general more better place in life :) I love that he was my first most serious that I've had thus far, and I have no regrets. I did a great choice, despite everything occurred. I love him and I care an incredibly great deal for him.
I started therapy with a new therapist today with the specific criteria I crave. A latina therapist who specializes in trauma and could probably relate, culturally speaking. I'm curious to see how upcoming sessions would be like.
All in all, had an interesting conversation with a friend whom i'm incredibly grateful i connected with and have grown somewhat close to in the last months. I've felt really lonely when relating to friends regarding family dynamics trauma. I genuinely want to be a better woman for myself, for the man I meet later in late, for the second career I choose, for my future kids, and just person in society. I get incredibly frustrated and sad, when I realize although i'm smart, driven, and ambitious, I have no familial template I can go to, and many things I lack in knowing how to do I feel. I hope I can outgrow the "not knowing" and learn from others, choose older folks (10 years +) to befriend.
our purpose in this world is to help others, and if you can't help them, then you can't hurt them.
I'm so terribly saddened that as much as I try to make this work out, my heart is ripping apart and I know deep down inside, you are not the one.
I want it to be you so bad though, I don't want to start again to "look for someone", open myself up, get metaphorically naked for someone else or others'. Others who may reject my difficult past. It's very tough for me.
You fit so well on paper and we get along good the majority, but emotionally, it seems you're not the right puzzle piece for me. The things you've said and the situations where I would have wished so bad for you to show up, you never did. It's incredibly painful. I care for you so much though.
Heartfelt.
I truly sincerely hope from the very bottom of my heart that one day I truly find the love I hope to find. I hope I don't have to write a manual, but they simply just know. They just know. I'm not sure if that's incredibly me asking for too much, but I hope I meet my person.
I hope I meet someone I can truly call my home. I hope I can meet someone, and just by looking at them, they can make all my problems go away. I hope I can find someone who indispensibly is there for me, and does not make me feel as if I am "too much". I hope I meet someone who says the right things that makes me feel nurtured at any given moment. I hope I meet someone who makes me feel as if I trust them romantically, spiritually, ethically, their decision making, etc. I hope I can meet someone who believes in chivalry, who believes in really showing up for me in the worst of times, just as in the best of times, without me having to remind them.
At 28 years old, I still do believe in my fairytale. Maybe others are darkened by societies' lack of chivalry, ethics, morality, but I truly want to believe someone out there is in this world for me that can make me feel so loved, nurtured, cared for, and is my number one cheerleader. Someone I can have a future with, grow with.
Distancing yourself from shit that continually triggers your mental health and hurts your heart is top tier self-care.
One thing about me, I don't distance myself from people to teach them a lesson, I distance myself because I finally learned mine.
Personal.
Working in education is heartwarming yet it's also so traumatizing and heart breaking for me. I am simply exhausted. I visualize the hurt and pain I've been experiencing. The somatic experiences, I see it.
My childhood was the most traumatizing parts of my life. Working in education, walking through school halls, the desks, the chairs, the environments, it's all bitter sweet yet really traumatizing. My life was the absolute worst at those ages. It makes me so sad everyday. I remember all the abuse I endured at home. I hate when people ask me, "Ms. F did this happen when you were younger, i'm sure your parents werent this way or how were they".
It's alot for me. It's all been so much lately for me.
The older you get, the more you choose calm over chaos and distance over disrespect. Drama becomes intolerable to you and your peace becomes your ultimate priority. You start surrounding yourself with people who are good for your mental health, heart and soul.
We cannot, simply by an act of will, free ourselves from repeating the patterns of our parents’ behavior—which we had to learn very early in life. We become free of them only when we can fully feel and acknowledge the suffering they inflicted on us.
Alice Miller, The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self