d e v o n
EXPECTATIONS
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YOU ARE THE REASON
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@soulsuee-blog
Thoughts of a People-Watcher
I love going on long evening walks or rides. Walks that stretch into the unfolding of the night. On days when I do so, I look for a quiet spot far away from mindless chatter and just watch the day drawing to a close. I donāt have to worry about anything else because it feels like where I should beā¦ what I should be doing. ā£
I watch people too; observe those coming and going on foot and in carsā¦
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Self-Discovery: A Journey
When people tell stories of how they overcame challenges and came into knowledge of themselves, it usually sounds like something that happened in a faraway place. This, I think is because the process is oftentimes overlooked in favour of the product.
In my discovery of self, I first established who I was not; I was not my background, neither was I unwanted. I am an Amazon, Godās beloved and aā¦
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Sweetheart, I Love You.
My Hope (s)
I hope with you I wonāt have to act different. The bad days wonāt come to stay That every doubt will go away. That we smile more and laugh moreā¦and do more. That I donāt have to fake everything being fine when itās actually not.
I hope that with you, Iāll be able to drop the fake smiles I show people and put on a real one. That the creative genius in us will never die, And we shineā¦
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The Other Day (26/9/)
Pre-script: this post is long overdue.
By the way, I really donāt know if thereās anything like pre-script.š
The other day was my birthday; a day among days, but still a day like any other day. Atleast to me, because my mother thought differently. She sang the birthday anthem (yes, anthem), fussed all over me, and complained about not being able to bake me a cake for me that day (she still bakedā¦
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You're Always On My Mind
Youāre Always On My Mind
āTo 2017, for kickstarting my journey to becoming.
Andā¦to you reading this lenghty stuff, thanks a whole lot!ā
Sigh.
I quoted what Iād typed on December 31st, 2017.
Looking back, yes, 2017 did kickstart my journey to becoming, like a warm-up, and 2018 has so far brought me further into the process.
If you read my āThank Youā post, wellā¦ Iāve been away since 31st till now. How long? 8 wholeā¦
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#FleetingThoughtFromLastNight. Shout out to all those who can still manage a hearty laugh and positive disposition even in the face of their troubles. #positivevibes #benice #everybodysgoingthroughsomething https://www.instagram.com/p/BmDShNsnx9D/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=lk9pxogta3z1
Thank You: Now, and AlwaysĀ
No amount of words can ever be enough to express my gratitude to all the awe-mazing people in my life, but here goesā¦ THANK YOU: To God, Iām amazed at how far you have brought meā¦that Iām even alive after all the risks I took and times I didnāt send you. It is to your credit that I say: I. A.M. A MIRACLE. Baba, no one like YOU, thank you for your boundless love!Ā To my mother, book (s) go full ifā¦
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When I open up to some people, they are always like "WOW! You always look good, I would have never known you're going through stuff like this. How do you do it? How do you survive?" Well... let's just say God has been good, even though I don't merit it (truth is, we all don't. But then, His love is unconditional). Now, I cry when it all gets too overwhelming (it's okay to, instead of holding it all in and acting macho all the time), I speak out and reach out to people when I feel like I can't take it anymore, I have some amazing people in my life who I consider as WALKING DEFINITIONS OF LOVE, and yes, I pray - it works best when all else fails. You should too. #christmaseve2017 #happysunday #inspirationalwords (at Church of the Pentecost, 21Road, Festac Town.)
Note to self
Dear beautiful one, occasionally, try going out without the need to look 'perfect'.
#newpostonblog Padi mi, @otumthegrapher your expression in this photo is šÆ. . . SOLILOQUY . Who do you call, when youāve tried, and gotten tired of voicing out, because no one lends you an ear? When all the salty water flows like a spring from your eyes, and dries up, leaving behind traces of sadness, which brand of make-up will be best for a disguise? When you know something in your soul has died, how do you live? What do you do, when you attempt to bring your thoughts to life in words ā because that is how you manage to stay sane- but they end up in the bin, shredded beyond coherence? Where do you go, when the four cardinals of your room have become your fortress, a world of your own? What do you do when the person you could swear was your āfriend,ā turns out to be your biggest fiend? How do you survive, when the only sunlight you get is the weak ray of hope that kisses your face when you flutter your eyelashes open in the morning ā so weak that it fails to melt the frosty despair in your heart? How do you explain that the lamp in the night sky has become a stable companion to the nocturnal being you have become, andĀ the only other face you see for weeks is yours; looking back at you in the mirror, unsmiling? . . Thanks for reading up to this point! If you care to read the rest, it's on my blog. #linkinbioš . . #soliloquy #loudthoughts #writersofinstagram #soulblogger #blogging #newblogpostalert #whenyoucanttakeitanymore #expression #artislife #photographyisbae #otum #girlwithsoul #iwrite #soulful #depression #africanwriters
Dear you, You drive me crazy such that I canāt seem to get you off the wheels. The speed at which weāre going is quite tempting, exhilarating and maddening. āEnjoy the rideā you say to me with lips ever so inviting, but Iām familiar with this road on which we journey; it starts off at a fast and promising pace, but the end is always abrupt and saddening. . . . You can read full post of "Letters To You" here: https://soulsuee.wordpress.com/2017/12/09/letters-to-you/ . . . Thanks for reading!
There have been periods in my life when I constantly gave in to frustration, and found myself being swept off my feet by tidal waves of depression. In those trying periods, I began to ask God: "WHY?" Life: "what have I done for you to deal me such merciless blows?" Myself: "How much longer can I endure and keep holding on?" And then I would cry and wish the pain would end, but I've learnt to smile more, pray and stop wishing. I've learnt that nothing lasts forever, not even the hell-ish periods. I've learnt, and I'm still learning. I pray someone out there learns this too. Photo credit: #pinterest