Sparklyofmyveryown @sparklyofmyveryown - Tumblr Blog

Quick life update

I should update this more. So here ya go. Some new-ish hair. And we’ve been chasing waterfalls this summer.

Penny girl. She’s two now. Where the hell does the time go? What did I do with said time before I knew her? These are the weird, and oddly heavy, questions you ask yourself upon becoming a parent.

Penny is a sweet girl. Sometimes when she’s around other kids and she doesn’t know exactly what to do or how to act, she simply pats them on the arm, or looks at them and smiles, or just straight up offers a hug (sometimes whether they like it or not 😂.) These moments obviously bring me joy as a parent, but also, I am reminded of how we should all be a bit more free and forgiving and earnest and open with love and how we can extend grace into the world.

Dear Penny, you’ve taught me so much in only two years. You amaze me with your smarts and strength and whole hearted sweetness. I hope to grow a little closer to you and a little more like you every day.

You are the best thing. I love you so.

Xoxo, Mom

Days like today make my heart ache to have another baby. But it’s not in the cards for us, I don’t think. My mama heart mourns.

Today was a good day, sweetest girl. You played outside. I told you about the creek and moss and sticks. We threw rocks in the pond with your grandparents.

Then we went to the local pizza joint down the street with Luna to eat outside bc the day was sunny, and we wanted to bask. You played so sweetly with a little boy about your age, named Cannon. You hugged and shared toys and danced. It was precious.

I hope you always have your open heart and your readiness for new experiences and opportunities for joy.

You are my whole heart, kiddo. All the love in the world.

xoxo- Mama

Sweet girl was having a rough day on Sunday. Only wanted to snuggle with me, and that was it. So we piled under blankets, me with coffee in hand, and watched some of her learning songs on YouTube. Her sad little face says it all.

Toddler-ing is hard 😜

Today I realized I need to actually write about moments so I don’t forget them.

Our usual sitter had to leave early to take a test so I was working from home this afternoon and also taking care of this lil thing. Her having a nasty diaper blowout (ew!) led to me having to get in the shower with her to rinse us both off. Yea dude, it was that bad.

She has a little giraffe hoodie towel, and I was drying her off with it and pulled the hoodie up, and held her up to see herself in the mirror. We spent the next 20 mins giggling and making faces in the mirror… and listening to her say “shiirraff” over again in her cute baby voice. I’d say, “Are you a little giraffe?” And she would nod yes and laugh and look in the mirror and chant “shirraff”.

Then we got dressed and played outside until dinner and until Patrick got home.

Tiny moments. They are everything.

Ah Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt..... This show is kinda silly, but def has some laugh out loud parts. (And let's be honest, I'm kinda silly, so I loved it.) But more importantly, this show was a crutch for me when I was home alone just a few short weeks after having Penny. Patrick had gone back to work, and it was really difficult on me. I had the baby blues and some postpartum depression. And let me tell y'all...that shit is real. Oh and while your body is recovering from some super hardcore shit, you don't get to sleep, and you are solely responsible for a teeny human who doesn't come with an instruction manual. I cried every day. I cried for no reason. Luckily I had friends and family who were there for me and checked in on me. And that support meant everything to me. But I also knew, deep down, that I had to just keep going. My daughter needed me, and I needed to get better. I created a ritual that involved either getting up for the day and feeding Penny and driving up to my parents house to hang and walk/stroll Penny around their neighborhood or getting up for the day, feeding Penny and attempting to get dressed and grab food, and sitting down to watch an episode of this stupid ass show. It sounds silly, but creating that ritual helped me survive. Giving myself tiny goals each morning helped me keep moving. And this show at least gave me some laughs. I'm just blabbering my thoughts because I was scrolling through Netflix and saw this show, and it brought back so many memories. But I just want to put this out there... if you are struggling with postpartum depression or any type of depression, please reach out to someone. I was lucky to have a great support group and a great OB doctor who took awesome care of me. Thankful for them...and this stupid ass tv show.

And just like that, I have a toddler.

I think we've all seen this. But I love reading it regularly as a bittersweet reminder.

This is an Instagram promo for kid to kid, but this is heavy on my mind, and why I usually try to buy second hand, thrifted clothing for myself and Penny! I would say at least 90% of what we own is used. I def have room for improvement. Every little change can help!

You're looking at the face of a woman who just made a life changing career move. I am scared-excited. But hell thats the only way we grow, right? To take risks and be scared shitless. Because if all was known, then what would the fun in that be? I rarely post here anymore, but it's still my safe place and I want to document this moment. Aight life, lets do this thang!