being a woman is difficult. I say this because I tried and failed. Full disclosure: I tried and failed.
I struggled with femininity since puberty; I never blossomed, I do believe I leafed, though. I wish I could say that I did not try, but that would be false. My attempts at beauty and femininity were enthusiastic, I tried makeup and straightened my hair, I held myself in a better posture, maintained my voice in a melody. But my makeup gave me acne, my hair is a stubborn ass, I am always slouched over a book and I cannot contain my voice during arguments.
in my late twenties, I surrendered and defeat brought salvation. I was relieved, but in this I noticed that my default was rather "masculine" or "androgynous". I did not seek to be masculine, but I started wearing straight cut shirts that did not hug my body and left me itchy. Trousers and slacks became more relaxed around my thighs, my hair was pulled away from my eyes (not sure if this is boyish) and my face is always bare save for a moisturizer during winter. In the abandonment of femininity, I could relax.
the bathroom was no longer littered with multiple bottles promising ethereal beauty; repeat if necessary. Shopping for clothes became a biannual activity that lasted fifteen minutes and my closet was comfortably homogeneous so that I was not lost in an abyss every time I had to get dressed. I saved thousands of bucks on beauty treatments that never left a lasting impact. I have more time for myself now.
femininity is an expensive lifestyle. It is also emotionally and physically draining. I understand now why men are funnier and generally more relaxed and I am better for it. True I may be doomed to a cottage with cats, but I am better for it.
baratheonpilled
turnnoffyourmind
ellievsbear
theartofmadeline
annaxmalina
gummygunk
izzy806