Thoughts

Everyday the sun rises bringing new opportunities and learning Each year spring comes , where everyone's alive again. When the sun sets and winter comes there is darkness. I don't want to be in the darkness. I need to grow and experience. I want to reflect in alli I've learned , in all experiences. I was in a D/s relationship. It was a journey with ups and downs. I was trying to learn to understand and accept who I am. I'm not sure that is a journey I will ever take again. I wrote about our relationship to clear my mind and show my vulnerabilities and experience. I like and reblog things that I relate to. I collect and post quotes that speak to me. I love to travel and show destinations I want to see. I also love music and keep some of my favorite songs here as well. Finally, I am happy to answer your questions. If you are under 18, this is not a blog you should enter. The ideas, feelings and posts here are beyond you right now.

[springtimesunrises]

Stronger

Not long ago I received a gift from the man I love that says “you are braver than you believe. Stronger than you seem. Smarter than you think”. With his strength behind me, I began to feel it.

Not long after, the man I love left. No real explaination. No notice. No nothing… Mostly silence.

I don’t feel brave. I don’t feel strong. I don’t feel smart.

If I was smarter, I would’ve seen it coming. I would’ve seen him pulling away. Maybe I wouldn’t have been completely vulnerable and open to him.

If I was stronger, I’d be able to hold myself together, and not feel like my stomach is in knots and my heart literally aching.

If I was braver, I’d be able to move on. Maybe want to see if there is a lesson in all this.

I feel anger. I was completely vulnerable. I shared intimate thoughts, moments and even secrets that I have never shared with anyone.

I feel sadness. I love him and his quirks. I miss him.

I feel lonliness. He was my best friend. I told him everything. Big and little.

I feel empty. I depended on him. He wanted me to depend on him. He said he needed that. And now I don’t have that.

He believed I was intrinsically submissive. I believe that is true too. I couldn’t get “there” 100% because in the back of my mind I thought about being 100% submissive to him and losing that. I was close though… Feeling this lost and lonely and empty, maybe 100% wasn’t something for me to give.

All I know right now is my world has collapsed around me. I’m not strong…

Dominants… If you take it all from your submissive, make sure they can be strong without you if you take it all away.

[springtimesunrises]

Can a man who is a Dominant fail? Can a man who is a Dominant completely reverse direction on every value he believed in and professed to others? Can a Dominant completely disappear in the face of extreme turmoil? Can a Dominant really leave a submissive, his “prized possession” completely alone and in the dark while he also flounders and struggles?

I know he’s only a man. I know he’s human. I know he has flaws. But was a truly a Dominant? Is he still a Dominant?

I have experienced submission only with him. Inherently, I know I’m submissive, but I’m not so sure I can ever return to the person I was with him. I believe I will never submit again. He has left so many unanswered questions. Did he truly love me as deeply as he said? Was I really a “prized possession”?

Can a Dominant enter such a world of mental chaos and turmoil that he loses all sense of who he said he was. Who he believed he was?

Do I wait idly while he finds calmness in his life? Do I continue to want the man back?

Do I accept that maybe I wasn’t as important as he said I was? Do I accept that the Dominant is gone? I don’t have the answers.

Maybe a Dominant does…

[springtimesunrises]

[springtimesunrises]

It’s been almost two years. Not a day has gone by where I didn’t think of you when I wake up, during the day and before I go to sleep. You’re a part of me. In my heart. In my head. In my soul. You changed me in ways I never thought possible. I still want you. I still need you. I still love you. I still hope...

[couplemoansforever]

Sometimes it’s harder to be loved

[thefoxof86-deactivated20220707]

I dislike how close to home this feels.

[springtimesunrises]

Exactly!!!

[haveuseenmyhalo]

I don’t know who to properly credit- but this is 💖

[fuckyesfeminist]

Average size mannequin with average size woman.

[powertripenterprises]

The problem, in one picture.

[doshicryptid]

I never realized until seeing this picture that my interpretation of an average size woman has become REALLY SKEWED oh my god I wanna cry

[foreignpussy-deactivated2015062]

best picture ive reblogged in a while.

[feminismandmedia]

I’ve been struggling with my body image recently because I’ve gained a lot more weight… and this is so helpful to me because I think my image has been skewed by a lot of mannequins in stores. 

[gramjams]

Boost the fuck out of this post. The fashion industry has a lot to answer for in making women feel so shitty about their bodies. Curves are beautiful ♥️

[frenchmorningtea]

Fuck them! And yes, you may interpret this exactly as you wish

[extramadness]

[apassionateman]

Amen…

[springtimesunrises]

💖

[infinitelyhisgirl]

∞

[springtimesunrises]

EXACTLY!!!

[quotefeeling]

“Stop worrying about someone that isn’t worried about you.”

— Unknown

[springtimesunrises]

I can’t...

[soulmates-twinflames]

[mightyaphrodite69]

[springtimesunrises]

Absolutely True

[qvotable]

“Two souls are sometimes created together and in love before they’re even born.”

— F. Scott Fitzgerald

[thegingerpowers]

[stay-close]

I hope you find someone you can't live without. l really do. And I hope you never have to know what it's like to have to try and live without them.

— Kiera Cass, The Selection

[bnmxfld]

“I am too tired and I miss you too much.”

— Simone de Beauvoir

[breathtakingdestinations]

Barcelona - Spain (by Jorge Franganillo)