We are Haneen and Noor sisters, Haneen is a public relations graduate, media and… Haneen Al-Borai needs your support for Help me and my fami
This is important
My dear friends, Haneen and Noor are trapped in Gaza with the rest of their family, two of which being Noor’s small children. They need $5000 per person, as they’re trying to get 9 people out of Gaza including themselves.
If you can, please donate as much as possibly for you. Please share their link, their story. I speak to them personally and will continue to share their story and provide updates.
Alright, chat, I'm about to explain why I think Shouta Aizawa has OCD...
Now, before I get into this, I want to break down OCD since I myself have it.
A lot of people think OCD is needing everything to be clean and orderly. We're depicted as the "I need everything in order because I'm OCD" which is so deeply incorrect. OCD, real OCD, is a disorder that can disable and even ruin your life. It causes your brain to latch onto anxieties or compulsions, no matter how irrational, and creates an urge to form a ritual to relieve stress.
For example, I have a really bad fear of people breaking into my house. I get really bad anxiety if I don't check that the door is locked frequently. This is a pretty common one for most people with OCD, but trauma and a lack of help can create far worse compulsions for us.
So, just keep this in mind while you read this unnecessary deep dive into an anime character I liked 5 years ago.
Apathetic or Misunderstood?
So, if you even casually partook in MHA stuff, you know that Shouta is a weird dude. He's a very bizarre character with a really reserved and aloof personality, the kind of guy that really doesn't seem to like people that much.
At first glance, Aizawa's character can be seen as nothing more than someone who's extremely odd and even somewhat of an ass. He's blunt, he's asocial, he claims he doesn't like anyone, he even says he doesn't like his students.
He says all of this, yet he's one of the first to rush into a fight to save the lives of the very people he claims he doesn't like. He also willingly participates in activities with the same people, even if he claims he doesn't want to be there. Shouta frequently says he hates being around Present Mic, but his actions contradict this time and time again. He also claims he doesn't like his students, but we see him dote on them a lot in various ways. He'll brush off Midnight's concerns for him, but clearly mourns her deeply when she dies.
The more you see from his story in MHA, the more you'll see how much he actually does care. He does have fun with others, he jokes (in his own way) with people, he does want his students to succeed, and it's not hard to see who he actually does consider his close friends.
So, why does Shouta speak so poorly of others? Why does he tell people he doesn't like them then agree to be around them?
A False Sense of Control
Life is unpredictable, especially things like relationships. OCD makes relationships twice as hard. People with OCD tend to view themselves very poorly and also worry about people in their lives more than usual. We see ourselves as lesser in a lot of instances, but also may believe we control the outcomes of things out of our control in relationships.
In Vigilantes, Aizawa states he knows his limits. He knows what he's capable of and what he isn't, which I think is true to an extent. But, there's a flaw in his logic. Shouta clearly believes he has far more control over situations than he does while also believing he has no control at all. He discourages Koichi from keeping a stray cat by lecturing him about what people are and aren't capable of, but we see that this is rooted in his loss of Oboro.
OCD can make a person latch to trauma and it latches HARD. As a highschooler, Aizawa was already a little bit odd. He was different than a lot of his classmates personality wise, but he wasn't the same way he is as an adult. He was anxious, depressed, and tense which is often how OCD presents in kids. We don't see as much of Aizawa's highschool days so it's hard to say how badly he was being affected, but his reaction to grief is what really makes me think he had OCD from birth.
When Oboro died in a fight next to him, Shouta walled himself off from everyone. Based on his talk with Koichi, we can assume Aizawa saw himself as having control over whether or not Oboro died. When my cat passed away suddenly from feline HCM, I struggled with it greatly thanks to my OCD. You constantly fear the worst when you have this disorder and, when something bad does happen, it's easy to spiral into a feeling of having total control over an outcome. You also, ironically, will feel like you have no control at all and will form a ritual to feel like you're regaining it.
Aizawa never seemed to move on from Shirakumo dying. Not only that, it defined his entire lifestyle after it. Aizawa is confirmed as caring very deeply for people, but we see him try to put up walls anywhere he can. He'll tell his closest friends they're annoying, he'll act like he's unhappy to be participating in something, and he tries to say he doesn't like his students. He believes he has to be overly strict to ensure these kids live and even seems to treat his friends the same way.
For someone who knows his limits, he sure does seem to think he controls far more than he can. When you look at his logic, it all boils down to this: "I let my guard down with a person I loved and that caused them to die" and "I need to control when good and bad things will happen around me so I feel safe". These feelings are not accurate to reality since we rarely control when people die and we can't always control when difficult events happen in our lives. Aizawa had no control over Oboro's death and he certainly isn't the one thing preventing his loved ones from dying modern day.
Shouta has formed rituals around these fears and feelings to make himself feel a false sense of safety. If he's always blunt or rude with people he loves, that means they won't die. If he's way too harsh on his students or even expels them, that means he saved their lives. It doubles as a way to push people away as well, since OCD can cause so much strain that you start wanting no one in your life just to make the relationship fears go away. However, you don't ACTUALLY want people gone and that's when things get hard.
Shouta doesn't hate people. Let's rip down his facade right now. Shouta may be an introvert, but he loves deeply. If he really hated people, he never would have stayed close to Mic, he never would have taken up Midnight's offer to teach, and he would always refuse participating in the things he's invited to. Shouta isn't the way he is because he hates people. Shouta is the way he is because his "I hate people" behavior is a ritual to make him feel he's in control while also putting up a wall. "I hate people" is just his way of saying "I love you and I feel like I'm responsible for your life".
This is a man who's life has been a snowball of unresolved OCD rituals for over a decade. And, when our rituals are challenged, we get REALLY cranky. When Midnight confronts Shouta about his behaviors, he snaps at her immediately. She seems to be the one who tried the hardest to challenge Shouta, despite him always being annoyed or angry. Thing is, this is necessary when you have OCD. You can't rely on your rituals because they don't resolve the emotional problem beneath it. They prevent you from moving on and healing, which is exactly what we see in Aizawa.
This is a man who NEEDS to feel in control because that idea of being in control soothes his fears about losing his loved ones. He believes he controls everything yet constantly feels he has no control at all.
Never Seeing Enough
As I said earlier, another trait of OCD is not liking yourself. OCD causes a lot of inner turmoil ranging from awful intrusive thoughts to ritual compulsions. The reaction to this is usually a deep sense of self disdain. People can range from feeling they're worth nothing to feeling like they're an outright evil person. Aizawa is someone who says openly to Koichi he doesn't think much of himself and we see this stated time and time again through his words or actions. Shouta doesn't see himself as worth people's time nor does he see himself as deserving of care (be it self care or care from others).
Mic is one of his closest friends, if not THE closest. He may act cold at times, but it's obvious he still cherishes the friendship given how often they appear to do things together. No matter how you may view their relationship, you can't deny these two have a very deep bond. If you watch Aizawa in the friendship, you can see patterns of him still not seeing himself as "as good" as Mic. Mic is a very popular hero and can gather a crowd. He's funny, energetic, and charming. But, Eraser isn't like him at all. Aizawa is stoic, reserved, and awkward. People fear him far faster than they like him and I would bet on the fact that Aizawa sees himself as undeserving of someone like Mic being in his life.
Shouta compares himself to others a lot and views himself as having less to offer than his peers. His depressive or overly strict attitude reminds me a lot of how my OCD makes me behave when the self hate it causes flares. When I start really feeling down about myself, I get really cranky or gloomy. When my partners try to be kind to me, I accidentally get really stiff because I subconsciously feel like I don't deserve it. Shouta seems to do exactly the same thing and it seems like he's down about himself OFTEN. I think he actually likes when his friends or loved ones are around him and involving him in things, but I don't think he knows how to properly accept the affection. A friend of mine recently showed me a blurb where Mic is chatting with Shouta and reassures him that he's perfectly fine as he is. Shouta seems shocked by it and replies awkwardly with an "oh... okay". But, I think it meant a lot to him to hear that from someone he's so close to.
Shouta could be praised day in and day out, but it doesn't seem like he'd ever truly like who he is. I think, especially in the epilogue, he does find a sense of peace. But, many of us with OCD will struggle with self hate our whole lives, even if we get healthier with time.
When it comes to deserving self care, Shouta is even worse at that. He, on more than one occasion, flings himself at death's door. In Vigilantes, we see him simply accept that he's about to die and he doesn't fuss once. We also see Midnight harp on him for how much junk food he always eats along with telling him she's worried about how his behaviors are affecting him.
One of the info books states Shouta only cuts his hair every few years because he sees haircuts as a waste of time. (Girl, your split ends....). He keeps very little in his room according to Horikoshi and seems to only do the bare minimum for his health- Brushing his teeth, bathing, and sleeping. Shouta seems to function on a sense of not feeling he deserves better. He treats his body with the same amount of love that he has for himself. He doesn't feel worth being at his best, thus gives up on it outside of hero work. While stinky Aizawa jokes are funny, I don't think he's THAT level of uncaring. But, I do think he cuts out anything he feels he can that's in the realm of self care.
I've done this myself as have many others with OCD. OCD makes it very hard to love yourself without putting in a lot of effort to do so. Add in ritual forming behaviors, and it worsens. Aizawa has likely formed a routine with these poor decisions which I think is semi reflected in his agency days montage. Work, train, sleep, work, train, sleep. All of which is done in an empty room without even a bed. He's someone who sees himself as undeserving of tenderness and health while also needing to be the wall between his loved ones and disaster.
Not All Doom and Gloom
While Aizawa certainly has a lot of struggles, it would be unfair to say that's all he has.
In the main story, spin off, and all the extra content, we're given a larger perspective on who Aizawa really is as a whole.
OCD is very hard to live with and exists on a spectrum, but many of us have plenty of times where we relax and show our true colors. Shouta doesn't always display the negative behaviors we see a lot of in the main story. When Shouta isn't dealing his inner demons, he goes from being reserved and aloof to mischievous yet doting. He's definitely still a weird guy (in a good way) but a lot more of that endearing nature shows when he's calm. Shouta goes from being a grump to being a jokester. He may keep up the stoic facade, but he clearly gets a kick out of teasing people he cares about. We see this especially with Mic, but he also does it with the students in the same way an uncle torments his beloved nieces and nephews.
Aizawa also seems to have moments of letting himself have fun, especially in spin off content and extras. He enjoys going camping with Mic, is rather goofy when out drinking with coworkers, and proudly chooses clothing for Eri with Midnight and Mic.
On top of being sneaky and silly, Shouta cares very very deeply. Even canon has stated he is really doting and will sacrifice everything for people he cares about. For having a very strained life with what I believe is OCD, he does still love others a lot.
The two reasons I wanted to bring this up are
1 - I wanted to bring up that Shouta has another side to him that isn't just pain and angst. He's my favorite character for a reason- He's one of the ones that feels a lot more in depth and is both a good example of untreated grief in a person and is what I personally feel is a good example of someone living with OCD. So, I like to point out that he has a happier side- One that for all we know is way more present around others. We just may not have seen it since Aizawa isn't the main focal point of MHA. I just hate seeing him reduced to being a bitter and hateful character by the fandom.
2 - I wanted to bring up a ritual that I don't think is based in trauma, but is simply a "tick" kind of ritual. The cat obsession... Shouta is so incredibly obsessed with cats. People with OCD pretty commonly latch to things which can get the disorder mistaken for autism. For us, our fixations stem from that ritual forming habit. In a lot of healthy cases, our interests are just a typical hyper fixation but don't ruin our lives. In unhealthy cases, fixations can actually lead to problems like hoarding. We have confirmation Aizawa isn't a hoarder, so I don't think his cat obsession is unhealthy. I do, however, think it's his BIG time ritual fixation. I mean, for a guy who only has what's "logical" in his room and life, kinda hilarious he buys cat magazines and carries around cat formula. I promise you, neither of these are going to break or make his survival. The cat formula one especially. I am so serious when I say that seems to be the biggest sign above all else. I used to carry stupid shit around with me because I had this idea in my head of what I MIGHT have happen to me. I believe Aizawa has a hilarious ritual that's basically "I need this so if I find a kitten, I can make sure it doesn't starve". It's entirely possible he still does this to this day as well and, if we're to see the stageplay as extra information on these characters, it's not at all unusual for Shouta to have weird items in his pockets. He does pull two bananas out of his pants for Mic, after all. (This is not an innuendo. This is a real moment in the play.)
So, that's one of the funnier / more positive traits I see as evidence of Shouta having OCD. Rock on, cat boy.
So, in summation, this is just a tangent post I suppose.
I may come back and add more to this if I think I missed anything, but the TLDR is:
I believe Aizawa has OCD due to the methods in which he copes with grief, his belief that he has to control the outcomes of his loved ones, and the way in which he interacts with people and himself.
Admittedly, I can also add in my belief that he has Bipolar Disorder to some degree, but BD and OCD actually often go hand in hand and many people who have one also have the other.
I see a lot of autism theories for him and I honestly can believe those as well. OCD and Autism have a lot of overlapping traits. But, for me personally, I believe he's a guy living with bad OCD symptoms who struggles to get himself the help he needs.
Coming back to this character years after being into MHA made me remember why I liked him so much. Aizawa is a fun character to dissect and is one of the most interesting to me. I find a lot of stuff in MHA frustrating modern day, but there's also a lot of stuff I do really like even now. Aizawa is absolutely that for me and I'm glad I'm back to doodling him and talking about him again.
I'm curious what you guys think about my head canon. Even if you disagree, I do hope it was some insight on how OCD really is, not how people claim it is.
Hey everyone! I have emergency commissions open! I have three slots open and my carrd with info will be linked below. If you would like to message me on here or through discord feel free but be sure to read through my terms of service!
Here is my carrd👇👇👇👇
All the information and contact information to get a commission from me
We are Haneen and Noor sisters, Haneen is a public relations graduate, media and… Haneen Al-Borai needs your support for Help me and my fami
This is important
My dear friends, Haneen and Noor are trapped in Gaza with the rest of their family, two of which being Noor’s small children. They need $5000 per person, as they’re trying to get 9 people out of Gaza including themselves.
If you can, please donate as much as possibly for you. Please share their link, their story. I speak to them personally and will continue to share their story and provide updates.
Do you remember Hexxus from Ferngully? I do! And that means i absolutely needed to draw some porn of him but first i needed to warm up with doodles of his dick. Currently obsessed with him right now so I promise more is coming ;)
Don't stop trying to donate my goal is very small I hope you can help me towards the better 🍉🇵🇸
"From the depths of pain, I call upon you… Save my family before our last breath fades 💔"*
To all compassionate hearts ,
My name is Mohammed, and I am a chef who once dreamed of building a bright future and achieving a life of dignity. However, the war has destroyed all my dreams and taken more from me than I can bear. I lost my dear brother to the war, two of my uncles, and my other brother was severely injured, suffering from a fractured pelvis that has left him unable to move.
My family and I are enduring extremely harsh conditions. Displacement has stripped us of safety and stability. With the bitter cold of winter, we struggle daily to secure even the most basic necessities of life. The rising costs of food, medicine, heating, and shelter are beyond our capacity, and we have no one to help ease our burden.
I am reaching out to you with a heartfelt plea, asking for your assistance and support to evacuate my family to a safe place and to help us secure essential needs like shelter, warmth, and medical care. We are clinging to the hope given by God and the compassionate hearts that understand the depth of our suffering.
I know that kindness and generosity never fade, and I believe there are those who will answer this humanitarian call. Please, be a source of support for us in this overwhelming hardship.
I will not give up on my dream and my life that I lost. I will try again for the better. One day I will be a skilled cook, but the circumstances surrounding us in Palestine destroyed what we wanted to do. It is unfortunate that we are in the darkness and injustice of the occupation.
My family's house, of which nothing remains but rubble. What can I say to this destruction? Will I ever return to my home, or will I die with it?
Just a quick note from your friendly neighborhood bookworm/indie author
if you use kindle for the majority of your library, they will be shutting down the function that allows you to download your files and transfer them via USB on the 26th of February. Which doesn't sound like a huge deal, but this also means that if a book is taken off Amazon for any reason—like it being banned—they can scrape it off your kindle as well. So maybe backup your library?
Edit: as an indie author I feel like I should make a small note that this is not an excuse to say “fuck Amazon I’ll just pirate my books”. Please don’t do that. No one’s reaction so far has been that but I’m begging you not to react that way. That doesn’t hurt Amazon it hurts authors.
Some alternatives are
- check and see if the author sells their books on other marketplaces. Hint: any not enlisted on Ku are probably wide
- check your library. If they’re not at your library request them.
- if all else fails, reach out to the author. I have 100% hunted down a way for my book to be available to a reader that couldn’t access it for whatever reason. And I’d do it again.
just cracked open my thrifted copy of Crime and Punishment to discover that it’s been previously annotated. i absolutely adore when this happens, it’s like connecting with the previous owner of the book and getting to know them a bit via their annotations.
I say, every single day, that when I become homeless I’m just going to kill myself because that’s better than how others will treat me. I’ve had so many health concerns but can’t afford to see a doctor so if I am right and something has been seriously wrong with me since I was 8 (I’m 24 now) then I know I won’t be able to pay to get treatment and I’ll have to die painfully. I know once I move out on my own I won’t be able to afford anything besides rent. I can’t even afford insurance for my car so I can’t get my registration updated and I can’t get emissions done and I can’t fix any issues it’s having, but I need that car to get to work to pay for my rent.
But my dad tells me I only see the negatives. Like please, tell me something positive about being so poor there is literally no escape? Tell me a positive to only having a thirteen percent chance of escaping poverty?
I am Mai from Gaza, from a family of 10, from Palestine. My family is Haya, my mother is 39 and my father is 49. I climbed the ladder to build my life and future step by step, but everything ended and was destroyed by the war. My sister Rital, 9 months old, is asking for milk and we cannot afford it. Every day she goes through a bad situation. Help us buy milk for my sister Rital 💔
I have witnessed the signs of the tragedy that befell our lives in Gaza, where my family and I survived many previous wars. But today we are facing the most dangerous and fiercest battle in the current war. The need is urgent for us, as we have nothing left and are unable to secure our basic needs such as food, water and safe shelter.
This is our story - On October 7, our lives changed forever. My family and I left our home to southern Gaza, hoping to return soon, but that did not happen. Our home was surrounded and then completely destroyed. Our home, once a bastion of hope, is now in ruins, a stark reminder of our shattered dream.
The goal of this fundraising campaign is to save my family - my parents, my siblings and myself - through the Rafah crossing into Egypt, which currently requires $5,000 per person. This campaign is our only chance for survival, and I humbly ask for your help at this critical time. I will provide you with a comprehensive breakdown of the expenses, committed to transparency and clarity.
We strongly appeal for your moral and financial assistance to cover the necessary costs of escaping to a safe environment, where we can build a better future for our children and ensure the safety of our family.
We are in dire need of your support. Any donation, no matter how small, can help save our lives. Thank you for your concern and support during these difficult times.
It is not easy to ask for help, but this war has changed everything, and I am sorry, my friend, I am very shy of you, but I need your help. Your donation saves my life. Donate even $20, please
Me and my family and our beautiful house that was bombed, our lives were destroyed 😭💔
Dear beloved friends, My name is Mahmoud Alkhaldi. I am a Palestinian refugee living with my fiancée and family in a catastrophic situation-in tents- in Rafah. However, for 116+ days, me and my family have been under intense bombing and warplanes rockets in the Gaza strip. I’m asking funds to evacuate (5) members of my family from Gaza to a safe place in Egypt, including my younger brother (Mohammed, his wife, and his 1 and half year son Yasser), and me and my fiancée Sujood). It could be very expensive and costly to evacuate a war zone at a miserable time like this. We will need approximately $50000 and a lot of prayers
Dear beloved friends, … Sara A needs your support for Help Gaza Family
My home was cozy, beautiful, and warm before the war. Here is some pictures for our house before the war
Our home was targeted in a tank bombing on the 25th of November 2023 that left it unlivable, along with the entire neighborhood of Al-Burij refugee camp, in Gaza City.
When we returned back to our home to get some needed itemsand clothes, we found that Israeli soldiers also steal our belongings. Since that day, my family has been sleeping in a miserable tent in Rafah, in the south of Gaza, which has become a home for all people from the Gaza strip, whose homes were also destroyed by airstrikes, but they have survived thus far.
I can't express how useless and depressed we felt after finding out what they'd been through and are currently going through. Each moment, we worry about losing them. Without connection settings, we cannot constantly contact them. During the moment of typing, over 25,0000 individuals have been killed in Gaza. They are without electrical power or heating for a period of three months, food is limited, and their drinking water is unsafe for human consumption. My family's only hope is to evacuate to to a safer place out of Gaza. My family went through the loss of several friends, and many of them have lost their spouses and children. I am afraid of losing my family. They are the light that leads me through my life. I cannot live or survive without them.
The expenses of travel for 5 people are as follows:
• $50000 for the boarding pass (Egyptian coordination) to pass Rafah border, 10000$ for each person.
We are need your help and support in raising $50000 to transport them from Gaza to Egypt. Once the cash are put in the US bank account, they will be deposited to my family's bank account. He intended to utilize the funds to cover the costs of going to Egypt as soon as feasibl
I came here asking for your help to get Haneen and her family out, which I still beg for, but now I bring another friend of mine for you to consider donating and helping escape Gaza as well. My friend Mahmoud and his wife Walaa have their gofundme, asking for help to escape the conditions they’re experiencing. Mahmoud is a disabled pharmacist in Gaza, trying to get his large family safe. His father was arrested for over a month and tormented. He was released and suffers great deals of trauma and agony after such torture.
Please do help them at the link below!
With much sadness and even more pain, today I send you an urge… Mahmoud Alzanati needs your support for Help Pharmacist Mahmoud's Family To
We are Haneen and Noor sisters, Haneen is a public relations graduate, media and… Haneen Al-Borai needs your support for Help me and my fami
This is important
My dear friends, Haneen and Noor are trapped in Gaza with the rest of their family, two of which being Noor’s small children. They need $5000 per person, as they’re trying to get 9 people out of Gaza including themselves.
If you can, please donate as much as possibly for you. Please share their link, their story. I speak to them personally and will continue to share their story and provide updates.
Rafah has been bombed and set ablaze, babies being decapitated and killed off
We need to get my friends and their friends and their families to safety. We need to spread the word. We need to hold these homicidal, genocidal politicians accountable and throw them out
We need to free Palestine
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