Therapy Sessions: What are your views on love?
Love? Is that really a question for a Doctor like you to be asking? I haven’t even brought up the damn topic in any of our sessions and BAM, just like that? Just like that, huh? Whatever, I don’t care. It’s not like you’re going to tell anybody anything anyways, so I guess it doesn’t matter, right? Do I make any sense? Moving on.
If you were to ask me what I thought love was back in high school, I would tell you that love was supposed to be something everlasting, beautiful, amazing. It was supposed to make your stomach do somersaults; it was supposed to make your hands clammy, your heart pacing, and your mind racing. It was supposed to be the perfect feeling you could ever feel in your life. The highest high without drugs and all you needed was that one electric touch.
That all disappeared once I was thrown into the field.
Never, ever, ever date a male Marine because most of them are assholes that will cheat on you for the next hot thing that walks on by. Which, you know, I don’t blame them because you’re in the middle of a war; you don’t know when your last breath is going to be. And if you want to tap some ass, then by god tap that ass. But don’t be committed to someone, don’t tell them you love them, string them along and feed them bullshit that you feed all the other women you meet. What’s his name?
Let’s call him Andrew. We met back in boot camp and he helped me out a lot when guys would stare at me and make rude remarks. Back then I was quite sweet, quite innocent and I was actually afraid someone was going to throw me on the floor and force me to have sex. I wouldn’t be surprised if a Marine did that, though. Despite how loyal we are to our country, Marines are stupid assholes who think with their penis rather than their head. They fuck anything they see, which I know I should have applied that rule to Andrew, but I didn’t.
Feelings developed, I told him I loved him and then he fucked the next girl he saw. Went out with a few other Marines who ended up doing the same to me, dumped me for the next piece of ass they saw walking. Ugh, it irritated me so bad. So I gave up Marine Men, they’re my brothers.
Which is probably why I haven’t been really looking for ‘love’ in my days here. I much prefer to fuck some good looking guy for a few days, only to turn around and leave. I don’t want to be tied up in a relationship. I don’t want to be loved right now. I don’t even love myself.
