[Text ID: 1. You don't love me and I'm being really brave about it
2. I will not mention the last time I saw you.
My mouth, so far from yours, I said
I am afraid I will spend entire years
trying not to need you.
As if I wasn't certain.
As if this wasn't my confession.
3. When you left I walked into the ocean. Not to drown but to held by something reluctant to let go.
4. "And it was so cold then, and so silent, and I loved you so much. Now it's hot, and dead quiet again, and I love you still."
5. I'm always soft for you, that's the problem. You could come knocking on my door five years from now and I would open my arms wider and say 'come here, it's been too long, it felt like home with you.'
6. When does a war end? When can I say your name and have it mean only your name and not what you left behind?
7. I wept and wept. I had come to believe that if I really wanted something badly enough, the very act of my wanting it was an assurance that I would not get it.
8. "I just miss you, in a quite simple desperate human way."
9. I bet on losing dogs
I know they're losing and I'll pay for my place
10. And there's nothing, that I can do,
Except bury my love for you.
11. And if four long years come to nothing
That's all right
But it's your birthday
It's your birthday tonight
And I went to buy you something
But I caught myself in time
And nothing makes any sense anymore
But everything rhymes
Die hard
Die kicking
Old habit of mine
Sources: 1. @/cybermrcury on Twitter; 2. The Next Time We Talk On Facebook by Clementine von Radics; 3. Postcard from Gone by Leila Chatti; 4. An Abundance of Katherines by John Green; 5. Azra T.; 6. On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous by Ocean Vuong; 7. Zami: A New Spelling of my Name by Audre Lorde; 8. Vita Sackville-West from a letter to Virginia Woolf; 9. I Bet on Losing Dogs sung by Mitski; 10. Moondust sung by Jaymes Young; 11. Waving At You sung by The Mountain Goats
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