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pairing: producer!jihoon x singer!reader
prerequisites/warnings: cursing, cheating :/ (not by woozi ofcofc,, sorry riwoo.. ur my victim), yn lore
a/n: sorry this took eons omg.. i wrote this on the plane otw back from my trip :3, there may be spelling mistakes.. my whole bad
You waited nervously at the park, your knee was bouncing, your bad habit of biting your nails has returned since the whole ordeal. What if he didn't show up? Before you could overthink anymore, you hear a familiar voice coming from behind you,
“You know your hand is full of bacteria right?” you hear the voice say. You turn around to see jihoon. You did a double take making sure it was actually him. “Thought i wouldn't show up?” he asks sitting next to you.
“Would it be bad if I say yes..” you say, avoiding eye contact with him. “yn you wound me” he sulks, reminding you of every time soonyoung sulked when he broke a bass string. A wave of cringe washes over you making you jokingly shiver to jihoon’s confusion.
There was an awkward silence.. You didn't actually think it would get this far and you forgot to actually prepare something to say. “So..” jihoon says breaking the silence. “Fuck i’m so bad at confrontation” you sigh. “jihoon.. I’m so sorry for everything” you start, your hands were shaky as you spoke. “I- i know nothing I say right now can change how much I hurt you but i’m really sorry”
Your eyes finally leave the floor to look at jihoon. His facial expression was his thinking one. The one you saw while he was mixing. When he couldn’t decide whether to add reverb or autotune, the same face he made when you guys were at the convenience store and he needed to decide between ramen or udon.
“I just.. I don’t get it. I accept your apology.. I just don’t get why you basically ghosted me” he says now meeting your gaze to which you look down again. There was a moment of silence. You once again, had no idea what to say. “yn.” jihoon says, breaking the silence. “You were the one who asked to meet to clear things up, yet I feel like i’m the only one actually sharing how I feel” he says, starting to get a bit frustrated.
“seonghwa told me-” you say but jihoon cut you off. “I know what seonghwa told you, but I have a feeling he’s not the one who made you avoidant when it comes to other people.”
He was reading you like a book.. It was really scary. “You really want to know?” you say quietly. “Only if you really want to let me in” jihoon says. “I care about you yn but this relationship whether it’s platonic or romantic can’t work if you don’t communicate with me too” he says. You meet his eyes, “how much time do you have to listen?” you joke getting a slight chuckle out of him. “I’ve got all day” he says, getting comfortable on the park bench.
“your place?” you say just as he settled into the bench. “God yes please.. My back hurts” he says as you laugh. The two of you get to the apartment luckily all his roommates were out doing their own things. The two of you settle on his bed before you let out sigh. “My band right? We started in college.” you start..
you weren’t always an avoidant person.. in fact it was quite the opposite
it was the second semester of your senior year. god tired wasn't even the right word. You were absolutely exhausted, so ready to graduate already. But before you could even think of walking down that stage, you had one more thing to accomplish.
It was the thing everyone in your major dreaded the most, your senior project. What was this project you may be asking? A mini concert for your entire graduating class. You were in charge of the songs as well as the structure and some production of it.
you scheduled to perform your project in two weeks, your band luckily agreed to be your backup band in the performance. big events like this always stressed you out, you got more snippy with your band, you didn't mean to it just ended up happening. you'd get frustrated usually argue with someone you’d blow off the steam and come back like normal.
you would run rehearsals like a maniac, yelling if anyone dared play a wrong note, stopped in the middle of a song or got lost in the piece. Your band got used to your outbursts. They knew you were stressed, you were just lucky they were so understanding.
but throughout the whole thing, your boyfriend riwoo had your back. the two of you met first day in your production class, he was sweet, nervously asking if he could sit next to you in class on the first day. the two of you clicked instantly, if you weren't hanging out, you were texting and when you weren't in class, you were in one another's rooms.
you were so excited about your project, excitedly yapping his ear off about it and he always seemed just as excited to hear it or so you thought. the day of your concert you were so nervous. You bit your nails as you stood in the green room.
What if you forgot a song or your guitar string snapped? your bandmates came in five minutes later with their gear. “has anyone seen riwoo?” you ask, still pacing back and forth. A chorus of “no, sorry” echoed throughout the room. I’m sure he’ll be here soon!“ seokmin reassures you.
you go out into the hallway to call him, instead being led right to voice mail. you pace again, surely he had to be coming back soon. you hear some commotion down the hall. you turn the corner.. and you see it. riwoo making out with another girl in the hallway. you wanted to yell at him but right when you opened your mouth he started to speak first.
"isn't your girlfriends thing today?" the girl asks. riwoo shrugs taking a crumpled piece of paper out of his pocket which you realized was your concert's poster. "i was never actually going to show up" he says, sounding almost offended she asked. you just stood there, your throat suddenly felt dry all the water you chugged felt useless.
you walked back to the green room, your bandmates looking in confusion. "where's riwoo?" soonyoung asked. "he's not coming" you say simply, picking up your guitar and retuning it. "we're on in ten" you say looking for the producer on your set, a senior you had befriended named hongjoong. (tehe).
mingyu could sense something was up, pulling you aside right before you went on. "are you okay?" he asks, genuinely concerned. you nod but he didn't buy it. "what happened with riwoo?" he says, looking right at you. "he's busy" you reply not wanting to talk about him anymore. "we have to go on stage" you say opening the curtain.
the four of you step onto stage as you thank everyone for coming. you swallow all your emotions before you start your set. everything goes relatively fine. sure you're heartbroken but at least it helps you show your real emotions for all your sad songs.
as you're about halfway through your set, you fucking see him. riwoo sneaks into the back with the girl from the hallway. you couldn't believe it, you freeze on the spot, your guitar would have dropped if you didn't have a strap. your bandmates look in confusion. you feel tears threaten to prick your eyes.
you run off the stage nearly tripping over your guitar cord. mingyu was the first to follow you off followed by seokmin and soonyoung running at the same time back to the green room. "yn!?" you hear them call behind you. you couldn't believe he had the nerve to show up. let alone with that girl.
"riwoo.. he was fucking cheating on me" you sob, curled into a ball on the floor. seokmin and soonyoung did what they could to console me while mingyu just stood there. before you knew it, he was out of the room. "mingyu where are you going" you ask. "to go take care of something" he replies throwing his jacket on the couch. "don't do anything stupid" you say through sniffles. "if it's for you then who cares if i do" he says before leaving the room.
the three of you sit in silence. seokmin had grabbed you a water, soonyoung had an arm wrapped around you. mingyu had returned, you could tell he got into a fight. his fist was bruised up and he looked pissed. "mingyu.. you didn't have done that." you sigh. "you're right. I needed to do it" he says, rubbing his fist attempting to soothe the purple bruise.
luckily, your counselor allowed you to redo your concert and you passed with flying colors. as for riwoo.. he had a bruise on his cheek for months. the only thing you didn't understand was why you didn't yell at riwoo yourself.
you used to be someone people didn't want to work with because of how outspoken you were. and suddenly you were a shell of yourself.
a cough from jihoon brings you back and suddenly you're not in the green room of your college, but back in jihoon's room. "i'm sorry you went through that" he says. "you didn't do anything you don't have to apologize jihoon" you say, your eyes never leaving the floor.
"i really like you jihoon.. and it's not like i'm saying you're going to cheat on me. i just don't want to disappoint you and go all avoidant on you." you admit. "i don't care" he shoots back which finally makes you look up. "what?"
"if that was your only worry then we can work on that." he reassures. "really?" you ask, genuinely surprised. "only if you also want to" jihoon says.
before you knew it, you leaned over the bed and kissed jihoon. it was spur of the moment, you barely had a second to think. your eyes widen when you realized what you did. "i'm so sorry I shouldn't have done that." you panic getting off the bed.
"yn it's fine" he reassures. "no.. it's not" you say getting up. "i have to go" you grab your bag and run out of the apartment. "yn!" jihoon yells running out without any time to put on his shoes but losing you since you ran down the stairs. he goes back to the apartment, texting mingyu to make sure you were okay.
he sits on his bed his feelings conflicted once again. it seemed like every time the two of you were one step closer to getting together, you got back to square one. he decided to sleep it off genuinely not knowing what else to do.
you get back to your apartment. your eyes red from crying. you didn't want to hurt jihoon and if running away helped that you would never stop running. a text from seonghwa snapped you out of it as you remembered your gig tomorrow. you try to get some sleep knowing you'd need it.
"i'm sorry jihoon" you whisper to yourself before passing out.
because of how yn used to be she had to ask 7 separate people to be her producer till hongjoong finally agreed
yn is very fast at running she freaking bolted down those steps in 5 minutes (jihoon lives on the tenth floor)
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