blake kathryn
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Jules of Nature
Peter Solarz
if i look back, i am lost
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Product Placement
Cosmic Funnies
d e v o n
No title available
titsay
One Nice Bug Per Day
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Acquired Stardust
Kaledo Art
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
No title available
Keni
occasionally subtle
I'd rather be in outer space πΈ
seen from Hungary
seen from Hungary
seen from Singapore
seen from Netherlands
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Austria
seen from United States
seen from Italy
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Hungary
@stayingstills
# π¬πππ²π’π§π π¬ππ’π₯π₯π¬
a private, multi-muse housing various sports-based original characters, written by tee, twenty-1+Β βΒ she/her οΉ activity varies heavily. minors οΉ personal dni. please do not interact unless we are mutuals.
οΉΒ Β Β Β Β DIRECTORY.Β Β Β Β Β οΉΒ β€Ώ carrd. prompts. pinterest.
@aperturcs
my cry count for today is 6
it was easier for mathis to take care of chase than himself sometimes. not that he took bad care of himself, but ensuring that his teammate that everything he needed felt like taking care of himself sometimes. it extended further than he ever could have expected... to a dog, but he always welcomed both of them into his home. the thing was - mathis knew that chase needed more than he did, he knew that chase need to have his dog with him more than mathis didn't really want a dog in his apartment at first. chase needed mathis to have a heavy hand more often than mathis needed to vent to chase about his troubles. chase needed to scream and yell at him, and needed mathis to take care of him after - and he never minded. at some point, though, mathis had forgotten that sometimes he did need things from someone. whether that was chase or not... and he couldn't imagine it being anyone but chase. "there's some treats in the kitchen for him. and food. i don't know if you need to feed him." its just easier for him to shift the focus from him. even now, trying to urge chase to feed him. "he might be hungry after his shots."
he hears the same words of advice that he gives chase, but they feel empty. the world was hanging over his shoulders and he didn't know how to put the blame anywhere but himself when this was the choice he made against everyone's advice. "it is a team effort." he can't sit there and argue against it when he constantly tells chase the same thing, but he also can't explain why its different for him. chase only knows the bare minimum about his family and mathis had intended to keep it that way. he liked that once he had come here, it was a fresh start. no one knew the weight that his name actually carried and no one cared. "i just think that over the years, i should have won something if i was as good as everyone thought."
mathis wasn't even sure anymore if the pressure he felt was from his desire to impress his parents, himself, or the need to satisfy the numerous people who needed him. he didn't just let down one team; he let down two. he didn't just let down a city; he let down a whole country. over and over again.
chase calls him out for not listening and can't help the hollow chuckle that comes from deep in his chest. he can't help but let the fondness he feels for chase show on his face, the determined nature that made mathis fall for him to begin with coming out in a way that he had never seen. he doesn't want chase's pity though. he wants chase to think he's strong and capable, so he's at a loss. he feels like he didn't do anything. win or nothing. but he can't bring himself to disappoint chase, even if it means hiding his real thoughts from him. instead he tosses a bone, new information about his family that he hopes might explain it just a little bit to chase. "my parents never wanted me to play in the nhl. i was supposed to have a... certain future that they intended, and instead this is what i chose to do." he pauses to clear his throat. "i need to replace the legacy i was supposed to have."
he's quick to shake his head. yeti doesn't move from his corner, fast asleep, letting out the occasional snore. "no, it's okay. i fed him earlier. they also said he'd probably be more sleepy than anything and he certainly has been. he didn't even lift his head when you said treats." taking a peek over, he makes sure his dog is still snoozing and he is. there seemed to be no interest in eating right now. "i'll keep it in mind for later, though. maybe he'll wake up in the middle of the night and be hungry." or at least want a snack. he never seemed to say no to those (not that he talked.)
chase isn't getting through him. if it were anyone else in any other circumstance, he'd grow irritated and possibly give up. never with mathis, though. not when the older male had helped him on so many occasions, even in similar situations. he lets out a small sigh. "yes, a team effort. isn't that what you always tell me? that i can't carry the whole team on my back when i'm not the only one out there on the ice? so why is it different for you?" his hand finds its way to his hair, tangling in it. massaging the scalp, trying to bring any sort of comfort he can. if words are failing, then maybe actions would help.
there had been more than enough times where he's been upset at losing. thinking that he's not good enough, that despite his stats, he had nothing to show for it. it breaks his heart to hear his captain say those same words and there's nothing he can do about it. all he can do is be here, he supposes. there are no plans to leave, but he wishes he could take away that guilt. the pain. the hopelessness. mathis was always so solid. he didn't think he'd ever see him like this.
it comes as a surprise, to hear him talk about his family. anything chase knew about them had been learned from whispers of others or wolf, never from the source itself. he continues to play with his dark locks, blue eyes focused on him as he speaks. "but you are. making a legacy, that is. first swiss to go first overall? captain of our team at such a young age? sure, we may have had a shitty season, but like...it's more than that, you know? your career, that is. i know you want something to show for it. physical, like a cup or a gold medal - but mathis, you are doing the damn thing, whether you realize it or not." he hates how exhausted he looks. chase wishes he could take it all away - the pain, the disappointment, the worry. but he can't. all he can do is offer a listening ear and kind words. he's good at that though, isn't he? his other hand finds his face again, stroking his cheek with his thumb. "i don't know much about them, but they're idiots if they aren't proud of their son for what he's done. to move to another country, learn a new language, play a sport like you did...i don't think i could do it." it's not said for a pity party - it's the truth, as far as he knew. "the guys respect you, and so many others do in the league. that means something." oh, how much this was hurting chase to see. "i'm here for you. i want to help. i know you're strong, and can handle yourself - but it's okay if you gotta lean on someone else, even if it's just for the night."
Practice 4/6: Mathew Barzal
she had been sleeping in the guest room when there was a knock at the door. wolf wasn't home, taking her daughter out so she could get some rest - but she had only been out for an hour when a surprise guest had arrived. anneliese is getting ready to shut her eyes again when there's another knock, this one louder than before. cursing in her native tongue, she runs a hand over her face before dragging herself out of bed and into the hallway, making her way towards the entrance to her brother's home. looks like they weren't taking the hint.
"mathis, i swear if that's you-" she begins, opening the door, only to be greeted by an unfamiliar face. suddenly, she's very aware of what she has on - an old tshirt of her brother's, long enough to cover what it needed to, but still short in its length. arms instantly wrap around her body as she stares. "can i help you?" her accent is thick, thicker than wolf's. she's spent less time in the states than he has, unable to shrug it off. "if you're looking for the goon that lives here, he's not home. try again later." @aperturcs
"of course. the menace." he smiles fondly at the dog though; he hadn't ever considered himself an animal person. he never had pets growing up and never had the chance to bond with an animal, but yeti always seemed to be right next to chase - which meant he was often right next to mathis. when he reaches out to pet him, yeti shoves his head into mathis' hand. "yes, because he always gets attention and treats." many of the guy had started to keep them in their stalls, unable to help themselves from rewarding him. mathis was one of them. mathis shakes his head at the apology and doesn't admit that the blankets are there for yeti. chase had only been over a few times before, but mathis had set the blankets out for one of the visits when yeti wouldn't stop wandering around sad that he didn't have a bed... and he just never picked them up. "its not trouble. they're just blankets." it pained him to diminish what it actually was when he was already hurting so much, but he wasn't sure where he and chase stood right now.
he's a little shocked at the order, but he's starting to think that he shouldn't be - chase seemed to know exactly what he wanted. often mathis didn't give in immediately; he loved to get a reaction out of chase, but he didn't have it in him in the moment. instead he lets his exhausted body collapse onto the sofa next to chase, wrapping an arm around his shoulders as soon as chase's head hits him. mathis shakes his head at the words. "its not okay." a bitter laugh pushes between his lips and he shakes his head. "no, that is the problem, isn't it? i'm okay. silver. always silver, always bronze. always nothing." he knows that he sounds like a sore loser, bitter. in a way he is. he deserves to win. he works harder than anyone he knows.
chase shifts into his lap and it shocks him out of whatever spiral he found himself in. his eyes go wide at the forced eye contact. "what ar-." he cuts himself off, swallowing back the words to listen to whatever chase had to say - even if he already knew that he wouldn't believe it. it helps; chase being proud of him thaws his angers out a little bit, but the sting is still there, the fresh loss still on his mind. "its not your problem to bear." immediately closed off again and his hands reach to his face to take chase's hands in his. one hand is brought to his lips, placing a gentle kiss onto chase's knuckles. "you being here is enough. thank you for being proud of me." but a bitterness hangs in the back of his voice - the part of him that wishes he thought he deserved that pride.
it had been a relief, the first time chase had come over and brought yeti, to see mathis so open to having him in his house. he had been unsure of how he would react, but he seemed to understand that chase's dog was important to him, especially on the nights he wasn't feeling himself. the older male had even made the golden a makeshift bed in the corner, something he was surprised to see was still there. it had been a bit after all since the last time the two were here. yeti spins once, twice, and then lets out a satisfied sigh once he lays down, causing a small giggle to escape from his owner's lips. "yeah, well, he's a good boy! he deserves it, or else he wouldn't be getting so many!" he definitely would, and has, despite some of his bad habits. "still. i know he appreciates it. i appreciate it." something so small, but it had brought a smile to his face when it had happened.
this is new for him. usually, he's the one in need of being comforted. but, even if he were feeling down tonight, he knew mathis was the one who needed him more. the past week had been good though, spending it with his brothers, even with his birthday and the anniversary of his dad's death lurking in the distance. the only thing he could focus on right now though was his captain. it felt like a knife to the gut, hearing how he thought of himself. sure, he knew mathis was a tough person to please, but to think such cruel thoughts towards yourself? not that he had much room to talk. "you do realize it's not just on you to win, yeah? isn't that what you always tell me, after a tough game? a rough season? that i'm not the only one out there, that it's a team effort?"
chase's hands are removed. he's about to protest, but then mathis is kissing his knuckles. the action is soft. gentle. it's a side he's privileged to see, because he's aware that it doesn't happen often. wolf has told him. "you're not - i know you're not listening. you think years of having an older brother and i'm not gonna notice that?" he shakes his head. "i don't care if it's not my problem to bear. i don't care if you took home silver instead of gold. it doesn't make you any less of a person. it doesn't - it doesn't erase what you did." it's like navigating unknown territory, trying to get through to him. chase leans forward and begins to pepper the older male's face with kisses. one on his forward. one on his nose. one on his cheek. one on his jaw. one on his chin. "you went out there and did the damn thing. i'm not the only one that's proud. your country is, too. i know they are. they'd be silly not to be. fuck, mathis, you're just - you're so great, and you don't even know it, do you?"
the change is so abrupt. one minute, he's out on the dance floor having fun, drink in his hand and not a care in the world. the next, he's storming over to the dj booth where he knows he can find his girlfriend, a look that can only be described as anger on his face. "i want to go home." he demands, resisting the urge to cross his arms over his chest and pout like a child. his entire demeanor has changed and that sparkle that always seemed to be in his eyes when he was out with reagan was gone. he doesn't know what's happened, but all he knows is that he needs to get out of here. "lets go." @likecavities
the plane ride back was yet another quiet one. he and wolf had shared too many and they had started to weigh on mathis through the years. it didn't matter how much he was praised elsewhere - none of it mattered unless he won something. the cup, the olympics, worlds; they all slipped through his fingers and left him with no legacy to leave behind. nothing to prove his parents wrong.
he had done his best to hide from his best friend - and he should have known it would be useless. they had known each other for too long for mathis to be able to hide anything from wolf; even things that he was hiding from himself. while he was grateful for it... sometimes he wished he knew how to hide from wolf the way that he could everyone else.
a short goodbye to wolf and a promise that he would call him tomorrow - knowing that he wouldn't - and mathis was in an uber back to his apartment, high above the city that he kept disappointing over and over again. and staring at his reflection in the mirror; he knew exactly what he was more upset over disappointing - himself. joining the nhl was supposed to prove that he was capable of creating his own legacy, and not just taking over his family's, but he couldn't even do that.
when he's about to get in bed, a knock echoes through his quiet apartment and as much as he wants to ignore it, he isn't that kind of person. he can't do it. so he slowly makes his way to the door, knocking into a table on the way and cursing under his breath.
the last face he expects to see, especially after how mathis had left things, is standing in front of him, throwing himself into mathis' chest - and mathis breathes a sigh of relief. doing amazing wasn't enough, but he didn't have the heart to tell chase that. so he buries his face into chase's hair for a moment and ignores the way his eyes burn.
only pulling away when his eyes aren't stinging anymore, welcoming chase and yeti into his apartment. "what are you doing here?" he finally questions, eyes wide and wild with curiosity. "i thought you would still be in michigan." he ignores the compliment. its easier to focus on chase.
the hug goes on for longer than he expects - but he lets it happen, allowing the older male to take whatever he needed. once they're finally apart, he offers a small smile. "yeti had a vet appointment." at the mention of his name, the golden retriever wags his tail, looking up at the two before nudging mathis' hand. "he's saying hello. i think he misses being around all the guys during off season. the locker room is one of his favorite places to be." as if he's agreeing, he lets out a bark before entering the apartment, going to the corner to lay on what seemed to be a stack of blankets. "sorry - he's got a mind of his own sometimes. its been a long day for him. he had to get two shots." it's such a casual conversation to have, when he knows there's more than likely a million and one thoughts swarming through his head.
as he enters his place, blue eyes watch curiously, trying to read the emotions written on his face. there doesn't seem to be any. frowning slightly, he nods his head toward the couch. "come on." acting as if he owned the place, settling onto the furniture and getting comfortable. patting the spot next to him, waiting for the older male to join. once he does, he's quick to cozy up besides him, resting his head on his shoulder. "you know it's okay, right? to not - to not get what you were hoping for. you played really well, mathis." he had kept up with the competition while in michigan, forcing both jasper and tate to watch the games, always watching for his teammate.
he's doing a dance he's never done before here. biting his lip, he weighs his options before he decides to say fuck it. climbing onto his lap, he uses both hands to grab at mathis' face, forcing him to make eye contact. "hey. look at me. listen to me." chase feels out of his element, but he'd do whatever he needed to in order to make the other feel better. "you can talk to me, you know. it might help. with whatever you're going through. but before you say anything, i just want you to know - i'm proud of you."
when his phone rang, the last person he had been expecting for it to be was wolfgang. while they were teammates, their contact was limited during the off season. not for any reason, but they weren't close like that. he answered, wondering what he could possibly want from him.
there is something wrong with mathis.
the words alone are enough to make his heart drop. he's firing questions at the older male, demanding answers. none come until he finally quits talking. go figure. wolf was always doing things like that to him, trying to teach him some sort of lesson or whatever. it was annoying.
as soon as he's off the phone, he finds himself throwing on a hoodie and grabbing his keys. yeti follows, tail wagging, seeming excited to go on a car ride. chase didn't know if reinforcements were needed but if they were, he was prepared.
traffic be damned, he would have been there sooner if he could. the second he parks, he's stumbling out of his jeep and racing for mathis' apartment. he swears under his breath as the elevator seemingly takes forever to get back down to the lobby. his captain had been left alone for long enough - didn't it know that? he's ready to say fuck it and take the stairs when the doors finally open.
after an antsy ride up, he's finally standing in front of his door. yeti sits besides him, patiently waiting for his fourth (because chase, jasper, and taylor come before) favorite person to greet them. the second it opens, the younger male practically throws himself in mathis' arms. "you know you did amazing, right? regardless of the outcome." he doesn't elaborate, but has a feeling he knows what he's talking about. switzerland took home silver yet again. @aperturcs
i really love this genre of image
𦦠hehehe
OMG MY SHAYLA... i hope u know i giggled about the tortured muses department for a good 5 minutes π
you are so sweet and lovely to talk to and our server name on discord makes me giggle shshsh your writing is so good and omg i love all your muses PLEEK. i like that your muses are all so distinct!! they have such great voices! omg and the lore... i love your lore and i love that you have so much lore for alt verses too (vampire chase i luv u...) wren and roman make me giggle n i love archer and nolan because wym the worms say he shouldn't be forgiven skjfsdkhf. u r the best ty for coming to my ted talk
ur honor i have two things to say: the friendship between a trans man and an nb lesbian is more powerful then any force on this earth as evidenced by vico and teddy @peachfvzz
if u give me an opportunity to kill a man i will take it @stayingstills
me after @likecavities
