Early Years Anxiety and the Power of Emotional Connection
From the perspective of a Higher Level Teaching Assistant (HLTA) working in SEN and mainstream primary education
Over the past few years, something has quietly changed in our classrooms. As a teaching assistant working across both mainstream and special educational needs (SEN) settings for more than thirty-five years, I’ve noticed a steady rise in young children - some as young as three or four - showing signs of anxiety, low confidence, and difficulty managing emotions.
These aren’t rare cases anymore. Many of our youngest learners are struggling with worries and pressures that seem far beyond their years. It often starts subtly - being withdrawn, tearful, complaining of tummy aches, or avoiding certain activities. But if these signs are missed or misunderstood, they can grow into more serious emotional challenges later.
Recognising the Signs of Anxiety in the Early Years
Anxiety in young children doesn’t always look like worry in the way we recognise it as adults. Instead, it can show up as:
Sudden clinginess or difficulty separating from parents
Changes in speech or regression in communication
Avoiding group play or social situations
Acting out, refusing activities, or struggling to settle in.
These are not “naughty” or “difficult” behaviours - they’re often messages from a child who is overwhelmed but doesn’t yet have the words to explain why. That’s why early understanding and emotional teaching are so important.
Why Early Intervention Matters
By the time children reach Key Stage One, many emotional habits and coping patterns are already forming. If a child learns early on that their feelings are noticed, named, and supported, they build resilience. But if those feelings are ignored or misunderstood, anxiety and avoidance can become deeply rooted.
Research shows that early childhood is the most important time for developing emotional wellbeing. It’s when children start forming their sense of self - how they see themselves, others, and the world around them.
That’s why emotional learning should sit right alongside reading and maths. Helping children understand and manage emotions early on gives them the confidence and security they need to thrive both in and out of the classroom.
The Role of Social Emotional Learning (SEL)
Social Emotional Learning (SEL) is at the heart of helping children grow emotionally strong. SEL teaches skills like empathy, self-awareness, and emotional regulation - skills that affect every area of a child’s life.
From my experience, when SEL is part of the everyday classroom experience, children become more confident, engaged, and kind. They start to express themselves better, understand others, and cope with challenges in healthy ways.
The Power of Language, Stories, and Discussion
One of the most effective tools I’ve found to help children talk about feelings is storytelling. The right story can do far more than entertain - it can open up safe, meaningful conversations.
When we read together, we can pause and ask:
“How do you think that character felt?”
“What would you do if that happened to you?”
“Why do you think he was sad?”
Through stories, children can explore emotions in a gentle, indirect way. They begin to see that feelings are normal, manageable, and worth talking about.
The Impact of Daily Acts of Kindness
Kindness is one of the most powerful tools we have to support emotional wellbeing. It doesn’t need to be big or complicated - just small, daily acts that show care and thoughtfulness:
Saying something kind Including someone who feels left out
When kindness becomes a habit in the classroom (and at home), children feel safer and more valued. Anxiety often reduces, friendships grow stronger, and children become more willing to take part and try new things.
Kindness, empathy, and connection aren’t “extra” skills - they are essential life tools
In my career, I’ve seen first-hand how early emotional education changes lives. I’ve seen children who once cried every morning blossom into confident leaders, and children with additional needs begin to open up and shine once their feelings were truly seen and respected.
When we create emotionally safe spaces - where children feel understood and supported - they flourish.
A Resource to Support You and Your Child
To help children explore these ideas, I’ve written a social story called “Have You Helped Someone Sparkle Today?”, an interactive picture book for ages 3–7. It’s designed to build emotional understanding, empathy, and daily acts of kindness through discussion-based learning.
The book includes discussion text on every page to encourage children to think, question, and share their feelings.
There are also free downloadable resources - including Secret Sparkle Challenges, Sparkle Trackers, and Certificates - to keep the learning going at home or in the classroom.
Every child deserves the chance to sparkle - and that begins with feeling safe, understood, and emotionally supported.
🌐 www.stephaniebradleyauthor.com
📸 Instagram: @stephaniebradleyauthor
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