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@strangeisbeautiful63
Individuality may be described as the consciousness of the individual as to what he is and how he lives. It is inherent in every human being and is a thing of growth. The State and social institutions come and go, but individuality remains and persists. The very essence of individuality is expression; the sense of dignity and independence is the soil wherein it thrives.
Emma Goldman, “The Individual, Society and the State” (via philosophybits)
1001 Grams (2014)
Ocean Vuong, On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous
1am thoughts
Hi! Long time no blog. I've been quite busy with law school for the past 5 months or so. I honestly didn't have time to think about what was going on inside my mind... and it is during this moment of nothingness that I feel all these feelings all at once. All the disappointments, rejections, and everything.
My first half of 2022 was not good. I somehow struggled during our finals week (that we did for a month) on the first month of the year, and in a short span of 1 or 2 weeks after that, we immediately started the 2nd semester. Thankfully, I finished both semesters of my first year in law school sane... but it had its setbacks. Right after the end of the academic year, we had a 2-month break and during that break, I think all the feelings that I failed to express or to vent out intensified—coupled with the fact that I lost most of my pets during the last quarter of 2021 up to the 1st quarter of 2022. My suicidal thoughts came back, and I'm in an unexplainable pain until the end of August. I honestly had no idea how I managed to pull my shit together and enroll in my 2nd year in law school. Now, I'm living alone after moving out in December.
I just really wanted to share how important it is to check up on yourself every once in a while... and be honest about how you feel. You cannot fake your way to your goals... you cannot misrepresent everything. Although this seems like a letter without closure, I do hope that you get to rest your mind, body, and spirit after working so hard or every time you get tired. I hope no one feels how terrible it is to not be able to feel things. Take care of your mental health!
this month has been mentally exhausting. i’m having recurring thoughts about what the future holds for me or if i’m doing it right. honestly, my mind has been shutting down any ideas and i’ve been very anxious for the past few days. i hope this won’t last. i hope this ends…
YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE FUCKING HAPPY. NOT AFTER EVERYTHING YOU'VE FUCKING DONE TO ME.
STOP FUCKING SMILING.
"But how much more tender were those words, next time, knowing that there won't be one?"
— Juhea Kim, from Beasts of a Little Land
My traumatized brain: everyone will hurt you and no one can be trusted
"i have so much to do :///" my brother in christ you are still scrolling
i told you i was mentally unstable why are you mad
“There’s a story behind every person, a reason why they are the way they are. So think about that before you judge someone.”
— Unknown
September 30, 2021
Wow. It’s been almost 2 weeks of law school and now I’m finally quitting. Just when I thought that I can still get the hang of it. You know it’s really difficult and mentally taxing when you don’t get any kind of support from your family and they don’t understand or even try to understand. I promise myself today, I’ll come back stronger next time. This home set up is not helping me. Needing a new family…. needing a new place. This place is cursed. I think I need to get out of here first before I pursue something???
oh. i didn’t get to quit lawschool. we fixed things, i sort my feelings out. in the end, this family is all i ever have. be it they support me or not, guess you still gotta grind for that dream. [to support the needs of my petz]
1 last req to comply with for this sem and in 2 weeks time, hello law school again [unless up would be open in moving the 2nd sem, admin’s pretty stubborn and i hate it]
Gervais unleashed
loved thiZ
