50 terrible 50 Shades lines starter
It was painful to find these lines, lets be in pain together
All of the lines come from a mixture of the 50 Shades Series written by EL James
Change the pronouns if you need!
Warning: Strong language and suggestive words (but come it’s the 50 Shades book, what you expect?)
“His voice is warm and husky like dark melted chocolate fudge caramel… or something.”
“He’s my very own [ name ] popsicle.”
“[ name ] just sent me a winking smiley… Oh my.”
“I don’t think my heart could stand the strain of another e-mail like that, or my pants for that matter.”
“I was serious about marrying you. We can get to know each other then.”
“He has a hotline to my groin.”
“He is an exceptional lover, I’m sure – though, of course, I have no comparison.”
“How do they know it’s him? His trademark unruly copper hair, no doubt.”
“Sometimes you’re so closed off… like an island state.”
“What a time to have a brain-to-mouth filter malfunction.”
“We don’t have long, [name ], and the way I’m feeling right this moment, we won’t need long.”
“I wonder if it’s still lust at first sight for them.”
“The orange juice tastes divine. It’s thirst-quenching and refreshing.”
“My very small inner goddess sways in a gentle victorious samba.”
“What’s wrong? What did that creepy good-looking bastard do?”
“Hmmm - he’s soft and hard at once, like steel encased in velvet, and surprisingly tasty.”
“Holy crap - just-fucked pigtails do not suit me, either.”
“Put the chicken in the fridge.”
“Dude. I need to get out of Seattle this weekend. This chick is all over my junk and I’ve got to get away.”
“She’s oil on my troubled, deep, dark waters.“
"And the sound travels directly to my groin."
"Well, I could fuck you over this piano.”
“I’m all deer/headlights, moth/flame, bird/snake- and he knows exactly what he’s doing to me.”
“Argon? It rings a distant bell from chemistry class- an element, I think.”
“She wants all that romantic shit. Fuck.”
“My inner goddess is beside herself, hopping from foot to foot.”
“I must be the color of The Communist Manifesto.”
“You didn’t have to track me down with whatever James Bond gadgetry you’re developing for the highest bidder.”
“This is wrong, but holy hell is it erotic.”
“Why is anyone the way they are? That’s kind of hard to answer. Why do some people like cheese and other people hate it? Do you like cheese?”
“Some boy scout he must have been to learn these knots.”
“I thought it was chocolate hot fudge brownie sex that we had, with a cherry on top. But hey, what do I know?”
“You have dreadful sex hair.”
I don’t remember reading about nipple clamps in the Bible.”
Poor, fucked up, kinky, philanthropic [ name ].”
“Introduce you to my [ relative ] as what? ‘This is the man who deflowered me and wants to start a BDSM relationship’.”
“Don’t get your panties in such a twist… and give me back mine.”
"No one’s ever said no to me before. And it’s so - hot.”
"They probably all thought you were gay, you know.”
“Oh… by the way, I’m wearing your underwear.”
“She says that I have to abstain from all sexual activity for the next four weeks.”
“I don’t know whether to worship at your feet or spank the living shit out of you.”
“I wasn’t aware we were fighting. I thought we were communicating,”
"Technically, I’m you’re boss’s boss’s boss.”
“I’d never beat you black and blue. I aim for pink.“
“I glance down his body. He’s still wearing his shorts and his shirt, and I still have my T-shirt on. Jeez– talk about wham, bam, thank you ma'am.”
“Firstly, I don’t make love. I fuck…hard.”
‘Because I’m fifty shades of fucked up, [ name ].’”
“If I want to buy you a fucking car, I’ll buy you a fucking car.”
“I don’t want fucking tea. I want to bury myself in you.”
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