by: Emma. [IG: @dvmplx._ ]
Early in the morning, I wake up uneasy,
chest tight, thoughts running, nothing comes easy.
Anxiety slips in, soft but relentless,
a quiet kind of noise that just won’t rest.
I breathe in slow, counting each beat,
trying to find calm in the noise underneath.
But the memories hit, sharp and exact,
like time never moved… like it’s all still intact.
It’s been so long… or at least it should be,
but the ache’s still here, holding on to me.
It hides in the small things, the subtle, the slight,
in everything that once felt right.
I tell myself “hold it,” keep it together,
like strength alone could make this better.
I clench my fists, steady the shake,
wearing a calm I’m trying to fake.
I don’t wanna fall, I don’t wanna break,
even when it’s hard just to stay awake.
Hoping one day this weight will ease,
and my chest can finally breathe.
And even with fear humming under my skin,
I’m still choosing to try, again and again.
’Cause even if I’m breaking where no one can see,
I’m still on my feet… just barely, but me.