Submit Your Dumb Starkid Headcannons

[stupid-starkid-headcannons]

Please submit headcanons!

-this blog is made for team starkid fans to submit their hcs about all of their shows (we also accept tin can bros and shipwrecked stuff!)

-submissions can be anything from story impacting theories to quirks you think the characters have

-please no explicitly smut headcanons. We like to keep it relatively pg.

-please refrain from putting links in submissions to avoid risk of the person running this blog getting a virus

(This blog was inspired by @questionable-chnt-hc, pls listen to camp here and there, it's great)

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It's tradition for the 5th graders from Hatchetfield Elementary go on a field trip to Watcher World at the end of the school year to celebrate before they move on to middle school. Some highlights from the time the class of 2021 went include...

Max and Kyle daring each other to ride the Tear Jerker, Max screamed like a girl and swore Kyle to never bring it up.

Richie and Trevor getting into a shouting match that ended in Trevor dumping a slushy on Richie's head.

Brooke trying to light a carnival booth on fire but was stopped by Grace being a tattletale.

Brad playing keep away with Pete's first pair of glasses before throwing them in the pool of the Eye Drop ride.

Paul as a chaperone was dragged into Binky's Watch Party where he was screaming internally the entire time. It didn't help when there was a sing-along part at the beginning and that the show abruptly ended when one of the actors AJ accidentally hit fellow actor Darren in the eye.

Ted was supposed to chaperone but disappeared at one point in the day. He was found drunk in the men's room muttering something about that jerk stealing her away from him.

Steph over hearing some adults talking about the upcoming Honey Festival how last years winner Mrs. Lauder will be a tough act to follow. This made Steph hide in a photo booth until lunch and mope for the rest of the day.

oh this is fantastic

[stupid-starkid-headcannons]

at least one or both of ruths parents are dentists so they have easy access to dental procedures and equipment (headgear) and somewhat influenced her nerdiness as they wanted her to study hard and also be in the medical field

oh yeah! cool!

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ruth couldn’t watch dora as a kid because she would cry out of frustration when dora would ask where things were and not hear ruth trying to tell her

this is so real

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grace didn’t have a cell phone for most of middle and high school

oh absolutely

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I think Max could be Grey-Asexual. Like, he's had a lot of sex, and he enjoys it. But then he experiences sexual attraction for the first time (for Grace) and he's like. Oh. Oh.

yes! i love it

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I'm 100% sure Tinky hates Nibbly for absolutely no reason. Not sure why he hates him (maybe he keeps stealing the Bastards' Box or smth) but he just does.

Evidence: I am literally Tinky and hearing Nibblenephim's name makes my skin crawl >:(

ok sure yeah

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Miss Mulberry and Brooke are mother and daughter. That's why Mulberry was on Brooke's case at Homecoming.

oh hell yeah

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sensing a lack of non-hatchetfield hcs so tiffany and vanessa are trans, bug is ace and also trans, and joey’s heart is SO ace too

yes! love this!

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The rickroll™ as a meme was made by Pokey as a low-key apotheosis :)

lmao absolutely

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gary and ted were classmates during college, gary was able to further his education but ted wasn't

yes

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Totally projecting here but Pete’s autism comorbidity issues combine with his blood sugar issues in a horrid cocktail of waking up incredibly dizzy and incredibly hot on a random Tuesday morning

(I’m only projecting the autism part, heat regulation issues are so real)

oh yeah i feel that

[stupid-starkid-headcannons]

Richie and Alice used to be close, but the older they got, Alice drifted away to the popular kids, and looked down on Richie for staying the same with his nerdy interests. He still says hi to her when she comes back from Clivesdale. She mostly ignores him.

awww poor richie

[stupid-starkid-headcannons]

Another crack headcanon

Pokotho was the instigator of the dancing plague

as far as im concerned this is canon

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Ruth and Richie are became ghosts when they died. Next time Trevor fucked up his cue, she dropped a light on him. Missed him by inches and scared the shit out of him.

He repeats scripts word for word now. And always thanks the technicians for literally existing.

yes absolutely

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ruth & richie are in a queer platonic relationship

they’re the only ones who can handle each other’s stink for prolonged periods of time /hj

seriously i love this for them

richie is trying so hard to help ruth get laid [he is the worst wingman ever, trust me], it’s why he tells pete he could just “hit it and quit it, bro”

awww this is amazing

[stupid-starkid-headcannons]

One of Pete's fondest early memories is Ted taking him to the movie theater for the first time when he was five to watch Meet the Robinsons. Ted fell asleep half way through while Pete was enthralled by the movie and it sparked his interest in science and time travel. A few years later Ted showed him the Back to the Future movies, even though Pete was still a bit to young for them he loved it.

aww i love this