Title: Nine Forty-Five in the Morning
Summary: On your or your soulmate’s sixteenth birthday, you get a clue to finding each other. Stan is 100% sure Wendy is his soulmate, so why does the universe think it should be Butters?
Technically set in the same universe as ‘Three Hours After Midnight’, since I could not get the line about Cartman making fun of Butters out of my head. Enjoy~<3
From time to time around the lunch tables at South Park elementary, soulmates became the topic of discussion for a day or two. Usually, the topic was brought up in relation to some big event such as a celebrity finding theirs or when someone’s older sibling turn sixteen.
Unfortunately, at Stan’s table, the topic was most often brought up by Cartman while he was taunting Butters.
“I bet your soulmate decks you in the face, Butters,” Cartman said around a ketchup-covered chicken nugget, “for leaving them with your bad eye.”
Butters pressed his lips into a line as he reached up and absentmindedly touched under his eyebrow. His fingers traced along the scar that ran through his eye and ended at the top of his cheek.
Butters didn’t defend himself, instead turning his face down to his own tray. Something about this always bothered Stan. The very notion of hating one’s soulmate was an impossible thought to even entertain!
The bedtime stories say once people’s souls were much bigger than they are now, but people were too happy and never left their own company, so the universe split the soul into different bodies, usually in two, but sometimes in three, four, or even more.
The stories also say that the universe saw how desperately people were searching for their other halves and promised them all a clue: on their sixteenth birthday, they and their soulmate would switch one eye. That way, each person always had a little bit of their soulmate.
His mom always ended the story by telling him that when Stan found his soulmate, he’d be the happiest boy around.
If the story was true, then you couldn’t hate your soulmate. They were meant to fill up the holes in your self.
Kenny punched Cartman in the arm. “No one would hit their soulmate on purpose, dumbass.”
When this topic came up, Kenny always jumped to Butters’ defense. Maybe he did it because he was just a good person, or maybe he felt bad for scarring Butter’s eye in the first place.
Cartman snorted. “If you woke up one day blind in one eye, you wouldn’t be upset? What if you lost your job because of it? You’d have to learn to live life completely different than you do. You can’t say that wouldn’t be a pain in the ass.”
Kenny opened his mouth, then shut it. Butters slumped farther down in his seat.
Cartman smirked. “My point exactly! Butters,” he dropped his hand on Butters’ shoulder, “You probably shouldn’t even look for your soulmate. They’ll hate you. It’s better you just die al–”
Stan ripped open his ketchup packet and squirted the contents right in Cartman’s face.
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