Literally the definition of imperialism and classism. Doesn’t matter how many peasants you sacrifice as long as the most powerful piece is left standing
Warnings🦢: Mikey's babysitting emma's son, reader has a baby sister. fluff mostly. a little bit of angsty frustration in the beginning if u like, really squint.
Synopsis 🦢:Babysitting sucked. Mikey was tired, grumpy, and one juice box away from losing it. All he wanted was to survive one day watching his nephew. But a chance encounter on a train, with a crying baby, a hot big sis, and a very unexpected baby flirt session—changes everything.
Turns out, babysitting sucked... until it didn’t.
-
“Mikey, CALM your ass DOWN. You're acting like I want you to die,” Emma snapped, exasperation practically dripping from her voice.
“But Emma-chan~,” Mikey pouted. Grown, 28-year-old man, by the way. “I’m a renowned street racer with a reputation. And that rep does not include being seen with a toddler strapped to my chest like some kind of kangaroo.”
Emma’s eye twitched. She was this close to losing it. She’d spent the last three days in full mom-mode, trying to keep the tiny human alive and happy, and all she wanted- all- was for her husband and her brother to take the kid for one single day so she could breathe.
Her shoulders slumped, and her voice cracked as frustration bubbled over.
“You know what? Fuck you guys. I just wanted a break…”
Mikey froze. Shit. He didn’t mean to hurt her. He was just being a little selfish, and maybe dramatic.
“…I’m sorry,” he muttered, looking down. “I’ll take him for the day.”
“You don’t have to—”
“I want to, Emma,” he said, voice softer now.
And just like that, the tension cracked. He saw a flicker of light return to her tired eyes. He was still tired, still a little panicked, but… it felt worth it.
Twelve hours later, Mikey was dying.
It was 12:00 PM. Only noon. And he had exactly zero baby energy left in the tank. The day had just started, and he already felt like he’d aged ten years.
Mad respect to Emma. She dealt with this every single day?
He wasn’t mad at the kid—hell no. He loved his nephew. The little guy was gurgling happily against his chest, waving stubby arms. Mikey managed a tired smile.
But he was also, like, so tired. Like, nodding-off-on-public-transportation tired. His knees were swaying with the train, and he was dangerously close to face-planting into the stroller of the woman next to him.
Then came the sound.
A wail. High-pitched. Baby. And it was not coming from his nephew.
He jerked awake, glancing down—nope, his kid was fine, still vibing. The crying was coming from across the train car.
That’s when he saw her.
Gorgeous woman. Dishevelled in a sexy, endearing way. Eyes wide with panic as she bounced a squirming toddler, trying to calm her down in a flurry of rocking and shushing. It was clearly not working.
Until it did.
The baby girl suddenly stopped crying, staring at something—or someone. Mikey followed her line of sight… to his nephew.
Who was waving.
And the little girl? Waving back.
The two babies began giggling, cooing at each other like old friends, babbling nonsense across the train aisle. Mikey and the woman locked eyes at the same time.
Stunned.
Relieved.
Both definitely clocking how hot the other was.
“Your brother?” you asked, nodding at the baby strapped to his chest.
Mikey blinked. Then grinned.
“Nephew. My sister’s kid. Yours?”
"Hell nah…" you laughed, "my mama's…"
"Ahh, so your sister hmm?" Mikey drawled, looking at the little baby girl sweetly.
"Mhm" you drawled, out of energy to form full developed words….
The two babies were still in their own little world, waving and exchanging high-pitched babble like they were fluent in a secret baby language.
Mikey tilted his head, still smiling.
“Well… seeing as the kids have clearly hit it off, maybe we should, y'know, schedule a… playdate?”
You raised an eyebrow. “Playdate?”
“Totally for them,” he said, nodding solemnly. Then, grinning- “We’ll just have to be there. Supervise. Exchange numbers. For safety purposes.”
You burst out laughing. A real laugh this time, loud enough to turn a few heads on the train.
“That was so smooth,” you said, still grinning.
Mikey pretended to wipe imaginary sweat off his forehead.
“Phew. Thought I’d embarrass myself in front of a woman and two babies.”
You pulled your phone from your pocket, still chuckling.
“Alright, Mr. Playdate. Gimme your number. For ‘safety purposes,’ of course.”
Mikey tried not to look too smug as he rattled it off, and you typed it in, saving it as “Train Uncle (Hot)” without telling him.
As the train rolled to the next stop, Mikey looked down at his nephew—still wide awake, still waving—and smiled.
Babysitting sucked. His back hurt, he hadn’t eaten since breakfast, and he was operating on dangerous levels of caffeine and baby wipes.
But… maybe it wasn’t all bad.
“Gonna have to thank Emma for this,” he muttered under his breath.
sick of hearing about "healing crystals" that "cleanse your mind and body of negative energy" i want to know which rocks can hurt you and fuck up your vibe so bad
everyone suggesting uranium isn't wrong but anyone who said "literally any rock if you're willing to resort to violence" are the only people who can get on my level. you're hired.
It's time to say bye bye again, we made it another year!!!
Just a reminder that if any of you had a bad 2024, felt like you didn't progress, or get anything done at all that it's ok. You survived and that's enough.
Apothecary Diaries is so funny. The ladies in waiting look at Maomao and are like ohmigosh a poor adorable abused puppy we must smother her in love and teach her our ways 😍 and the concubines are all like she saved my life and she saved my baby and she's so brave and smart and we love her so much and jinshi and everyone else is heart eyes about her and meanwhile Maomao is like el chupacabra in the corner barfing up goat bones
I love Moriarty the Patriot because William tries so, so hard to make this a “In another life, I would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you,” story but Sherlock looks at him and straight up goes “FUCK THAT WE’RE DOING LAUNDRY AND TAXES IN THIS ONE.”