So Data, you say you're from the future and you're like a 100%, completely artificial robot. First of all, that's fucking sick. Second of all, Jamie's shown me a shit ton of videos of androids and all of them creep me the fuck out. You're not as creepy but I definitely wouldn't fuck with you.
Which brings me to my first question: Before we get to anything else, I know it's on all our listeners' minds... how much can you lift?
That is an excellent question, Joe. My synthetic muscles and hydraulics systems provide me with strength well beyond the physical limits of a human being, but I am not aware of what my own limits would be. However, I can easily bend a bar of plasteel with a tensile strength of forty kilo-bars, so--
--Hold on. Jamie, look that up. How strong is that? Wait, the human bite force isn't even one hundredth of a kilobar? Holy shit, Data. I bet you could fucking chew through a tank. You think you could handle a chimp?
I have never considered that possibility, Joe. It would have to depend on whether my teeth could handle the material deformation of steel. However, I suppose we could test your question. Geordie, please replicate one live male chimpanzee with highly elevated testosterone, cortisol, and adrenaline levels, and beam it to our location.
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