hipster tool

dave | 23 | ♂ i put the romance back in necromancer please look at my photography ((ind dave stider)) ((nsfw))

[bloop9-deactivated20190507]

and then god said

[ddbdbdbdbdbdbd-deactivated20180]

that’s how it is on this bitch of an earth

[urbanbaddies]

[superimpxse]

aurulentkilljoy:

ii held my tongue.

pfft

[queenlohaanda]

my kids: dad what’s for supper? me: ooh hunny i am serving looks tonight kids: we haven’t eaten in 3 days

[superimpxse]

aurulentkilljoy:

be quiiet.

im not tryina be an ass or anything

[superimpxse]

damnhedidthat started following you

im dave and im torn between posting pics and sleeping

whats up

[superimpxse]

keedlez2 replied to your post: torn between going back to bed and posting more...

do both

and let karkat win

i think not

[superimpxse]

torn between going back to bed and posting more photography

im scared if i sleep karkats gonna come post more shit about my music taste

[superimpxse]

bisous is good lookin though a+

[superimpxse]

i dont even have a recent selfie to post or reblog

[aurulentkilljoyz-deactivated201]

ii’m pretty much alway2 fuckiing draiined 2o be glad ii got around two po2tiing my face for once. iit’ll probably be the fiir2t and la2t tiime you 2ee my mug. maybe. who know2.

Keep reading

[dateamonster]

anyone on these interwebs wanna talk about……… clowns?

[megalunalexi-aesthetic]

Hey d'you want to know why some clowns are scary?

[dateamonster]

i am definitely apprehensive but sure i would like to know

[megalunalexi-aesthetic]

So I learned to be a clown briefly in grade 7. And here’s the thing, clowning is taking the worst aspects of yourself and amplifying them to the point of hilarity (It’s quite good for self-esteem, actually). But here’s the thing, some people try to make their clown a happy clown when they themselves aren’t a happy person, and that is, technically, lying. And our brains are REALLY REALLY GOOD at detecting lies, so warning bells go off. And therefore we get scared.

TL:DR, the only scary clowns are the ones who are lying.

[dateamonster]

“the only scary clowns are the ones who are lying” is a mood and im not sure how but it really really is

[superimpxse]

aurulentkilljoy:

keep your eye2 iin2iide the nugbone at all tiime2, thank you.

hahahaha, what the fuck. biird? ii gue22 no one 2aiid he’2 great at niickname2, then, huh.

wow. yiike2. diid you really ju2t accu2e me of that?

NO PROMISES.

TO HIS CREDIT THEY DO SOUND A LOT NICER IN FRENCH. SO, I GUESS THE THOUGHT IS THERE BUT THE EXECUTION NEEDS WORK. ACTUALLY, BOTH ARE FINE. IT JUST HELPS IF YOU DON'T SPEAK FRENCH. OR ENGLISH.

IT'S THE MOST LOGICAL CONCLUSION GIVEN THE CIRCUMSTANCE OF YOUR REPLIES. *SHRUGS.*

[superimpxse]

rednotesilentsound:

damn more daves rose and i were just talking about all these fucking daves

hi karkat judging by your usage of “humans” i assume you arent

fountains are supposed to be magic or some shit but really some fucker came up with that idea to swindle poor idiots out of their pocket change

six year old me was very stupid but also i guess kind of not i managed to walk to a mall to grab money

i dont know maybe santa accepts sacrifices like soggy money he takes milk and cookies after all

i have a lot of stories involving small child me and santa

shits wack

hi sup nice to meet you blah blah blah

all that shit

OR TO SWINDLE POOR HUMANS INTO JUMPING IN TO GET SOME, ONE OF THE TWO.

BUT YEAH, I'M YOUR AVERAGE RUN OF THE MILL TROLL. I'M SURE YOU'RE USED TO THOSE. I CAN GIVE DAVE HIS LAPTOP BACK IF YOU WANT TO TALK TO HIM. HE'LL BE ON HERE MORE OFTEN THAN I WILL, HE'S JUST WORKING RIGHT NOW.

SWEETS ARE A FAIR TRADE FOR GIFTS, I THINK. BUT WHAT DO I KNOW.

YEAH, SAME TO YOU. HOPE YOUR NIGHT'S NOT SHIT OR ANYTHING.

[superimpxse]

rednotesilentsound:

@superimpxse

sup names dave

i dont know what to say besides this one time when i was maybe six i thought i could pay santa so we could get christmas too so i somehow walked to the mall about half an hour from our house and sat in the fountain to grab all the change that went in

bro was equally pissed and amused i think because he just stared at me for like ten minutes when he found me

OH. YOU'RE ALSO A DAVE. MY ROOMMATE - AND, COINCIDENTALLY, THE OWNER OF THIS BLOG - IS DAVE TOO. I'M KARKAT. HI.

HUMANS AND YOUR STRANGE TRADITIONS. WHY WOULD YOU THROW PERFECTLY GOOD MONEY INTO A FOUNTAIN? WHAT PURPOSE DOES IT SERVE? AND WHY WOULD YOUR SANTA WANT A POCKET FULL OF SOGGY CHANGE? I SEE WHERE SIX YEAR OLD YOU IS GOING WITH THE IDEA, AND I RETROACTIVELY APPLAUD THE EFFORT, BUT I JUST DON'T GET IT.

BUT AGAIN. HI. WHAT'S UP. USUAL GREETING THINGS.

[superimpxse]

aurulentkilljoy:

ii know.

well, he 2ure piick2 friiend2 fa2t, doe2n’t he? piick2 bad friiend2, two. prop2 two hiim, though, ii gue22. what’2 your niickname, then?

uh huh.

*ROLLS MY EYES.*

I CAN'T SAY I BLAME HIM, HONESTLY. BUT UH. OISEAU. IT MEANS BIRD. I DON'T KNOW WHY, I'M NOT A BIRD. BUT WHATEVER.

WE'RE NOT. WHY, YOU INTERESTED?

[superimpxse]

aurulentkilljoy:

ii’m two comfortable for that, try agaiin later iif you can riile me up.

who 2ay2 ii liike hiim. don’t make a22umptiion2. that ju2t make2 an a22 out of u. corny cliiche a2iide. iit mean2 adorable kii22e2. riip me.

2mh. you two are a match made iin heaven, ii’m 2ure. are you quadded or 2omethiing?

TCH. FIGURES.

I'M NOT ASSUMING ANYTHING I JUST FIGURED YOU'D BE FRIENDS SINCE YOU GOT A NICKNAME. THAT'S KIND OF ONE OF HIS THINGS HE DOES. HE NICKNAMES FRIENDS.

WHAT? OH, NO. NOTHING LIKE THAT. JUST FRIENDS. AND ROOMMATES.