How to be myself when I donât even know who I am?
On the day that you were born, did you know who you are?
You may not have had words and concepts to explain and define who you are, but your experience of you was 100% present.
You didnât know you were a human being.
You didnât know you had a gender.
You didnât know you were separate from the world that you experienced around you.
You didnât know you had a name or what a name even was.
You couldn't explain who you are, but you knew.
That knowing wasnât a concept or an idea. It was a feeling.
And that you changed from one moment to the next. You cried. You laughed. You slept. You got angry. You were hungry. You were content.
You were all of those things.
As you developed, you began to make more sense of the world.
You realized you were separate from the world.
You realized other people existed and you had different relationships to different people.
You learned to associate a particular sound as your name.
You learned to identify with your gender.
In spite of all the things you learned, you were still you, but you had now adopted a whole lot of beliefs as you that werenât actually âyouâ.
Over time, you began to increasingly identify with your physical and mental form.
You began to assume your preferences and inclinations were you.
You came to see your strengths and weaknesses as you.
You used your results and the reactions of others as a mirror to draw even more conclusions about you.
Little by little, defined yourself more and more sharply.
âThis is what I am and that is what Iâm not.â
In this way, you lost sight of who you really are (and have always been).
Because who you are isnât an entity.
Who you are isnât something solid and permanent.
Rather, who you are is an expression of life itself.
You change from one moment to the next and you hold within you all possibilities from love to hate, from generosity to selfishness, from beauty to ugliness.
In reality, you are all those things. You always were and you always will be.
You just lost track of who you are when you convinced yourself that you are âsomethingâ.
But no one is âsomethingâ, because we are all everything.
Trying to find something tangible to call âyouâ is the reason you lost your way in the first place.
So take a step back and let go of the need to define and explain who or what you are.
You will soon spontaneously return to the natural flow of who you really are.
Retrieved from Quora, Antti Vanhanen
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