"↕ - a memory that may or may not have happened - ✖ - a repressed memory - ✈ - an eye-opening memory (Nellie)"
↕ - His voice squeaks with a raspy throat as he attempts to learn how to shuffle newly discovered stubbed claws that serve as his new method of locomotion. A wiggle, some squirming, the most pathetic crawl manageable. He can't tell if it's light or dark, if the space he is in is small or bigger then his fresh young brain can manage to comprehend. He manages to move a foot, a whole twelve inches when a beak-- no a claw?? Maybe it was a beak... No no, it certainly had a warm wet nose! One that gently and lovingly nuzzled him back into nesting place with a caring sternness. It had soft fur, white he is sure of it even if he can't remember the rest of his surroundings. It wasn't scales or leathery hide because you can't keep warm snuggled up against that like you can with thick hair. He's pretty sure he used to hide in that fur.... Or was it wings? Teeth or mandibles? Ears or antenna?? He's pretty sure his lusus had a tail. They had eyes too!! Two or...three of them? he's pretty sure it was two or three even though he didn't know what numbers were back then. But he had a lusus, he's dead positive of that. There has got to be other trolls who remember their first wriggling day right??
✖ - Tracey and Dibble's hands are holding down his shoulders, not paying any mind to how the pressure they are applying to force his torso down is so very roughly rubbing his cheek into the thread bare carpet that it's giving him the worst rug burn under his eye. Nellie is pretty sure it's Dibble that hikes up his shirt so that his back is exposed to the chilly air in the bedroom (They kept the windows open just a crack because otherwise it would get too hot on the fourth floor in the early winter.) Nellie squirms hard, trying one last time to break free even if it felt like he was going to sooner dislocated a joint then break free of the hands restraining him. Both of his "siblings" just lean harder on him and when it starts to get hard to breathe Nellie knows to stop because he knows they won't otherwise. Nellie couldn't see or hear it, but he just knew Their older "brother", the 3rd bunks alpha, was behind him giving him some long winded speech over how he had managed to somehow, yet again, piss off the cerulean. Xannder was always looking for an excuse to punish subordinates, and to the boys credit Nellie had skipped roll call because he traded shower times with Jessie (who always ran late to her own morning lineup and was one infraction away from house wide probation.) Nellie could smell the smoke starting to circle thinly in the air around them, Xannder didn't even really smoke he just liked to seem tough and intimidating in moments like these. When Tracey's hands tightened on his collar bone Nellie knew the lit end of the cigarette was coming. And sure enough it did, to the left of his spine in the middle of his lower back.
✈ - The old mans fingers are the clumsiest fucking things Nellie has ever seen. Sometimes it takes mr. Vantas almost a minute to form one word and then he will quickly tumble through the next five, leaving them partially unformed, while he tries to keep up the pace enough to regain the boys attention. Nellies counselor had informed mr. Vantas he could read lips fine, so Nellie had no clue why Kasvik was trying so hard to have this wordless conversation at the dinner table. <How. Is.... Lessons happy?> "Oh wait, shit uh." <Good? Lessons good?> Nellie was supposedly taking online school feeding, or he was supposed to anyways. Most days he just sat around his new block finding ways to distract himself or sometimes he would leave the hive all together to walk aimlessly around the city, visit a few of his old stomping grounds. He had a curfew though, and wasn't allowed out without supervision past 9pm, part of his probation. By this point mr. Vantas has stopped trying to use sign language and is blathering on about his own day, or maybe what he plans to do on the weekend? Nellie isn't really paying attention enough to get details, he's too invested in pushing the leftovers around on his plate. Nellie didn't have a damn clue what made this blabbering idiot think about taking him in like this. First of all, Nellie never paid much attention to politics, but the old man was apparently some hot shot popular figure. Maybe this was all some sort of public face scam. Take in the lame ass street urchin, turn him into a proper little member of society. Yeah... That might make sense. From what Nellie had seen so far this "family" was an endlessly list of charity cases and losers. Or maybe mr. Vantas took him in because they are freak blooded brothers or some shit. Not that that sort of thing mattered too much on lauctis. "-ning to me? Nellie?" Oh shit, he absolutely was not paying attention. Nellie stops zoning out and eyes mr Vantas. Kasvik sighs and starts his sentence from the beginning, going painfully slow this time around. "I was just saying how I was offered free passes on an atmosphere shuttle ride, first class and everything." Nellie significantly straightens up in his seat now. "Usually I wouldn't accept the gesture but... Well I remember your counselor mentioning that you have a fondness for that sort of thing? They will have a complete viewing dock and everything. And there won't be any press if you are worried about that. I am a strong believer in keeping work out of my direct personal life... Obviously you don't have to go if you don't want to, I just thought it might be nice." Mr Vantas is leaning back into his chair, already expecting Nellies usual response. Either dead silence with a menacing glare or the child storms off every time. But instead Nellie stared at him from across the table with no such animosity. In fact, the boy looked rather surprised with this presented offer. Nellie hadn't done anything to warrant a reward, to earn him this sort of pleasant offer. There wasn't anything Kasvik would be gaining from it either. Nellie sat back in his chair, looking rather confused. This was... Only a nice offer. Nothing to be gained, nothing to lose. Just an opportunity to go and fly above the clouds in between planet and space. Nellie looked up again at mr. Vantas, who at this point had raised a brow and was looking just as confused with the child's reaction, and as Nellie made eye contact he felt his under used mouth form around the first words he had ever verbally said to mr. Vantas. "ye....ah. Sh-ure.."
