I moved to Oregon almost 2 months ago. The boys and I are adjusting well, and things are getting easier. Corey would love at the beach if he could, and Harrison is beginning to sit up and eat like a champ. Of course, you'd know all of this, if you had any interest in us. But, her we are, 2 months later, and I haven't heard from you, though you stressed your interest in a relationship with my boys, and I stressed my acceptance of that. I get it, you never had a real dad, you didn't know how to be a dad, whatever. And I knew that. And I accepted the craply excuses everyone made for you because of it. I accepted your lack of interest in my life because I knew you didn't realize you weren't interested. To guy, you were a good dad, and I can understand that; you mostly supported me for 18 years and a bit more, and I'm grateful for that. What I don't understand is simple, I think. As a parent myself, I couldn't imagine not having a desire to bond with my kids. Even during my depressive periods, I get out of bed to play a game or two. So, my question is, why didn't you have an interest in my life? I was a good kid. I got good grades in school. I gave you my name for bills so that you could (apparently) fuck up my credit. I was good at things and won awards for them. I was always as independent as my situation allowed. So, what was the issue? The thing is, it doesn't really matter anymore. I've spent a lot of time wondering why you bragged about being a good dad who loved us so much when you rarely spoke to us. Now, with children of my own who receive so much love from just me, let alone everyone else, I see that I don't need you, and I clearly never needed you emotionally. I see that I was an obligation and an inconvenience when it came to you achieving your rock star dreams. However, I'm no longer hurt. In fact, I'm writing this tonight because I've finally reached peace in it all. I accept that you stole from me, let me down, broke all of your promises, and were never there. I accept that you cheated at least bi-annually (leaving out hookers, fyi) and left your wife, my mom, to pick up the pieces because she felt a family together was the best. I admire my mom, and I'm grateful that your sad life has given me a great relationship with her. I forgive you, but 2 months is too long to wait for you to show interest in my beautiful kids, and your door is now closed. I hope you find whatever it is that you're looking for. I just hope you know that if you really think you want a family, you had an amazing one.
dededos
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