this will be the year everything changes!

[supreme-populazzi]

an UNHINGED recap of a 2011 YA novel no one has ever heard of

on this blog i will be liveblogging a reread of Populazzi by Elise Allen.

this was a pretty formative book for me as a kid, but it's not one that anyone knows about or remembers. so i'm making this sideblog to share the epic highs and lows of Populazzi with the people of tumblr. i'll be recapping, sharing my own thoughts, and sharing what i remember thinking about certain things when i was a kid

content warnings for: eating disorders (dealt with extensively), emotionally abusive family, sexual assault, self harm (mentioned), homophobia (mentioned), self harm (mentioned). i will tag individual posts with these as needed. let me know if anything else needs to be tagged.

a small bit of info about me below the cut

i first read Populazzi on december 4, 2014, when i was home sick from fifth grade. i'm 22 now. i reread the book pretty often, probably at least once a year, when i was a kid, and i've reread it once or twice as an adult when i needed a hit of nostalgia. i need a hit of nostalgia right now. i don't really have a good reason for why this book gripped me so much when i was 10, but it did, and now here we are.

[supreme-populazzi]

chapter 6

Cara calls Claudia, who "trie[s] to talk [her] down" from not having weekend plans with Archer. the two plan for Cara to spend the weekend at Claudia's so they can "sift through every second of [Cara's] first week with Archer and see if we could figure out ways to adjust my approach and maybe get better results." the two have been in constant communication all week so i do not know what good this will do

on saturday morning Archer texts her: "Imagining your breakfast... Cotton candy dipped in Tabasco?" that ellipses is so saucy to me

Cara responds that her "breakfast is a chocolate-chip-and-swiss omelet. Make you one?" Archer does not leap on the innuendo here. which is a first for these two

the only unappealing part of that omelet to me is the eggs

on monday Cara brings him green apples, dipped in a mixture of peanut butter and cream cheese, rolled in cap'n crunch. i kind of want to try this (probably without the cereal though). Archer reluctantly enjoys this

"Two weeks, tops, and you'll be begging to dip your fries in my shake." "You think?" It took me a second before I realized I'd done it again. My mouth seriously needed a chaperone.

calm down, Cara. anyway it's funny that Archer can say this stuff face-to-face but not over text. or maybe offering to make him breakfast isn't that much of an innuendo if it is actually breakfast time. idk

instead of going to the mall, Archer invites Cara to his house to play ping-pong. both of them believe themselves to be unstoppable ping-pong machines

there's a bit where Archer's mom (Bina) tells Cara to call her mom so she knows where she is, and Cara does so even though that's not really something her mom expects her to do, and Cara's mom (not sure she has a name) has Cara put her on the phone with Bina and they spend so long chatting that Cara just leaves her phone with Bina while she and Archer go to play ping-pong

"My reputation precedes me. Especially when I have a paddle in my hand."

i feel like in a first draft this was another double entendre that was leapt upon

they're equally matched at ping-pong. how often do you meet another person who can actually volley a ping-pong ball? i just feel like that's not very common. good for them

anyway they shake hands but then neither of them let go! Cara thinks he's about to kiss her, and then get nervous, and then has to pee, so excuses herself and the moment is broken. no kiss. but Archer invites her back the next day for more ping-pong

Cara and Claudia decide that he will probably try to kiss her again the next day, but if he doesn't, Claudia says Cara must absolutely not kiss him. "It freaks guys out. People pretend that's not true, but it is--I know from my Ladder research." lame. also i didn't know Claudia's Ladder research extended to actual pickup techniques and dating advice. i thought it was just a social climbing manual

[supreme-populazzi]

chapter 5

Cara and Archer "caravan" (i've never seen this word used in real life) to the mall after school, and Cara calls Claudia on the way there. Cara is describing this as a date. Claudia disagrees: "A date involves a change in habiliments; the guy providing or purchasing transportation, sustenance, and entertainment; and some form of physical contact, ideally a kiss." Cara reminds us that Claudia has never been on a date

anyway, Claudia brings up the Ladder again and Cara freaks out a bit, because she genuinely likes Archer and if they actually do start up a relationship, she doesn't want to use him for the Ladder. but she feels guilty for not wanting to do the project Claudia "spent all summer on" (?? she spent all summer photoshopping herself playing cello with yo yo ma, i don't think that obligates Cara to her sociopathic scheme). so she doesn't tell Claudia this

Archer opens Cara's car door for her. which honestly is more date-like to me than if he'd driven her there (it's crazy how they both just have cars. i mean people at my school had cars, i had a car, though not as a junior. but Archer said "we can caravan" like he took it for granted that Cara had a car. this is a charter school! it's free to go to! that's a crazy assumption!)

anyway Archer seems nervous. Cara is also nervous. it's cute

Archer buys her fries (he talked up the fries a lot) and then acts appalled when she dips them in her shake

i like Archer but i haaate when people get up in arms about how i eat my food. i'd have stormed out lmao. but Cara is not as pissy as i am so it's another opportunity for fun banter

i think i've tried dipping my fries in milkshakes before because of this book but it isn't for me. i do like dipping potato chips in chocolate ice cream though. which has nothing to do with anything i'm just telling you

ok when i mentioned earlier how weird Cara is about double entendre, i was thinking of the following exchange

"It's a textural thing. I like the feel of interesting things in my mouth." "Really?" "Yeah. Like Cool Whip with raisins and Grape-Nuts mixed in with a little chocolate syr--" Archer was staring at me with one eyebrow raised. Only then did I realize what I'd just said. I felt the blush heat my face. "I wasn't saying... I just mean..." Archer's grin spread wider. He knew what I'd meant. He was just having fun watching me squirm.

anyway i'd remembered the double entendre being the grape-nuts mention, but it seems like it's probably the "interesting things in my mouth" line. which is funnier. but like, when i was 10, you couldn't say grape nuts if you didn't want a bunch of people saying "deez nuts lmaoooooo" and not listening to the rest of your sentence. so i thought that's what was going on here i guess

however my point still stands (ha) about the erection jokes

Cara and Archer go to the mall to study together every day for the rest of the week

one of these times Cara starts telling him about a dream she had that featured him, involving a "weirdo globetrotting spy mission," before realizing that she'd admitted she was dreaming about him and getting flustered. this makes me sad. you can just tell him about the silly dream, Cara

at one point they wrestle as Cara tries (and fails) to force feed him a chocolate shake-dipped fry (this sounds super violent when i put it this way. it's cute, they're flirting)

Claudia senses that Cara actually likes Archer and basically gives her blessing to have done with the Ladder

on friday, while they talk over the phone, Cara asks Claudia if, if Archer doesn't ask her to do something over the weekend, she should invite him to do something. "Absolutely not," Claudia says. "You invite him and you look too eager. If he wants to see you, he'll do the inviting."

Claudia just because you like Shakespeare doesn't mean you have to accept his perspective on gender roles

Cara doesn't feel that way though, so while they're at the food court she just tries to psychically beam energy at Archer to sway him to make weekend plans with her. shockingly this does not work

[supreme-populazzi]

chapter 4

Cara compliments Archer on his recitation and it's a bit awkward, so she fears he was only nice to her that morning out of obligation. but he introduces her to his friends he was sitting with (seven of them! that feels like so many friends. and they all have the same lunch period!). the lunch tables only seat eight, so Cara moves to leave, and one of Archer's friends kicks him until he agrees to leave the table and go with her

i totally get feeling awkward at a new school, but this is everyone's first day of school, which diminishes the awkwardness at least a bit. surely there's other kids who are new here too? but there's no sign that this is the case

Archer takes her on a tour of the school, making up silly historical tidbits about the school. also there's more erection jokes

Cara has french at some point after lunch. not sure exactly when though

she calls Claudia on the way home, who tells Cara that she's made a great start on the Ladder

at home, Cara's stepdad, Karl, is in an excellent mood. "Karl was fantastic when he was happy: funny, smart, caring, insightful... the polar opposite of an unhappy Karl. An unhappy Karl... that was something Mom and I worked really hard to avoid."

fuck Karl. also Cara wonders if he's in a good mood because he slipped off to Atlantic City and had a good day, and, while (spoiler) the rest of the narrative gives us no reason to assume that Karl's gambling puts his family in tenuous financial situations, the fact that he does it regularly and it affects his mood doesn't make me like him any more

but the real reason Karl is happy is that he pulled some strings (ugh) and got Cara an interview with the dean of admissions at Northwestern, which is where Karl went to college and where, because Karl i guess never shut up about it when Cara was growing up, it's her first choice. it's not a formal admissions interview. they're just gonna have lunch together. this is insane

anyway the lunch is in April so neither Cara nor we need to worry about it right now

when Cara wakes up the next morning she finds that Claudia has e-mailed her a list of opening lines she can use with Archer. one entry on this list is "good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much," which, i mean, it'd work on me. though i suppose it hinges on their hands actually touching

but she doesn't use any line because Archer seeks her out in the morning, saying he'd looked for her after school the day before. they chat and it's cute. after english class he awkwardly invites her to sit with him and his friends at lunch. his friends interrogate her, but less than a page is spent on this, and Cara feels positively about the experience. Archer awkwardly invites her to the food court after school

Cara soars off to french class after lunch, confirming that that is her sixth period. seventh and eighth period must surely be some sort of science and some sort of humanities right?

[supreme-populazzi]

chapter 3

Cara and Archer arrive late to Mr. Woodward's english class

"My reputation precedes me," Mr. Woodward boomed as Archer and I tried to sneak in. "You were afraid to enter my class. You were wise."

this guy annoys me

Mr. Woodward takes the infamous Bat out of the closet, and Cara seems afraid he's actually going to bludgeon her with it, but what he actually does is read the love song of j. alfred prufrock (one of my favorite poems, incidentally), letting the bat rest on the desktop and raising it until it's perpendicular to the table, letting it drop again when the energy of the poem deflates. Cara impresses Mr. Woodward by catching on that eliot is "making [his images] stand erect" and then lets them "go flaccid"

i think what this section is doing is showing how Cara enjoys the academic environment at her new school, but. it's an opportunity for more erection jokes i guess? i don't really see any thematic parallels between Cara and j. alfred prufrock, unless the idea is that she's embarking on the Ladder to avoid letting her life go by like in the poem... i'm not compelled by this

also this is the first day of school, Mr. Woodward, why are you making erection metaphors instead of going over the syllabus

Several of us had gotten so involved in fervent Prufrock talk that we weren't even sitting on our chairs anymore--we'd migrated to the tops of tables. That never would have been allowed at Pennsbrook, but I guess here it was part of the whole charter-school-teachers'-and-students'-creative-thinking thing.

this IS something that probably would have been allowed at my public high school (depending on the teacher), although i don't know how i would have gone about migrating to sit on my desk during a compelling lesson

Archer and Cara make more erection jokes as they part ways. good for them i guess. Archer says maybe he'll see her at lunch

Cara is so pleased by having a new friend that she contemplates forgetting about becoming Supreme Populazzi and thinks maybe her new goal should be to have a total of two friends at Chrysella

the Supreme Populazzi (Trista Camello) sits in front of Cara in precal! she smells like "fruity vanilla-jasmine" which sounds like too many scents to me

anyway Cara is nervous, because of the face Trista made when she saw her earlier, but when Trista turns around to talk to someone, she does not register Cara at all

all the cool kids in class tell Trista how much fun her party on Saturday had been. "I was impressed that Trista herself didn't talk about the party at all. She let everyone else rave about it, and she was nice and thanked them, but she didn't go into it or anything. It was like she knew the other people wished they'd been invited and she didn't want to rub it in. It was cool." which starts our trend of the Populazzi not bullying the uncool kids. which i think is a pleasant change of pace. and more realistic i think? as i've said there wasn't a most popular kid in my school, but the kids who had a lot of friends and were cool didn't get that way by being dicks to everyone else.

after third period, the whole school gets a fifteen minute break before fourth period. this is a charter school difference that interests me! but the free time is lonely for Cara. she goes outside, just out of curiosity to see if the Populazzi are in their tree again, and finds a slope where the senior Populazzi are gathered. someone yells at her to get away from Senior Slope

i guess this belies what i said earlier about the Populazzi not bullying less cool kids, and maybe it does, but it also reads as seniors being a dick to an underclassman for no reason. which i do find more realistic i must say. though Cara is a junior, so not really an underclassman

also i think it's a bit strange that the Populazzi are divided by grade level

anyway Cara runs away from the slope but trips and falls, and everyone laughs at her, including the junior Populazzi on the tree

okay fine this is mean. but it's still not bullying so much as a one-off instance of cruelty

How was I supposed to know it was the Senior Slope? It was my first day! It's not as if they had signs posted. Now I was a loser because I couldn't read their minds?

good for you Cara

but she's so freaked out by the unwritten rules that at lunch she just gets a protein bar from a vending machine to eat in her car :( (she's not allowed to leave campus, which she chalks up to the Charter School Difference)

Cara's schedule, if anyone cares to know, is first period english, second period precal, third period study hall, fourth period art, fifth period lunch. i'll be so pleased if i can fill out the rest of her schedule

she calls Claudia, who encourages her to get back on the Ladder, go out to the cafeteria, and target a Cubby Crew boy. Cara decides that her social gaffe means she could use the Ladder for support, and that she deserves to be just as happy as Trista

so she goes to the cafeteria and finds Archer standing on his chair and reciting casey at the bat for his fellow Theater Geeks. but like, loudly, and so well that everyone else is paying attention

in the way that the DangerZones have the aura that emos aspire to, i guess Archer has the aura that theater kids aspire to

a more complete description of Archer's OUTFIT: "khaki pants, blue-and-white striped oxford with the tails hanging out, abused sneakers he'd probably worn for years. I could even see the outline of undershirt sleeves on his biceps. He topped it all with the gray tweed Gatsby hat with the brim snapped down."

i should also note that Archer is i think the only character of color in this whole book

anyway Cara notices how cute Archer is as he finished his poem. Trista stands and applauds him, the whole cafeteria follows her lead, and Archer realizes how much attention was on him and bows before sitting back down

Cara notes that Claudia would approve of her picking a boy whom the Supreme Populazzi admires, and anxiously approaches his table.

I had found my first target.

[supreme-populazzi]

chapter 2

since i first read this when i was 10, i was not previously familiar with a lot of the shakespeare lines Claudia gives us. Claudia and Cara have a joke based on Claudia misunderstanding "once more unto the breach, dear friends" as referring to deer friends "a team of ferociously loyal woodland creatures rallying behind King Henry to power him through." and now this is what i think of when i hear that line too

i bring this up because Claudia uses the image of the Deer Friends to pep Cara up on the first day of school. "I may have been in an unfamiliar place, but I wasn't alone. Claudia was with me," is what Cara thinks upon receiving this message. i just like Cara and Claudia and their friendship a lot, i know i ragged on Claudia in my chapter 1 post but i think they're cute together. Cara walks through the hall of her new school videoing random stuff and sending it to Claudia. relatable. she does acknowledge that she would "score major dork points if anyone noticed" this behavior

at this point Cara meets Robert Schwarner, who greets her by saying he feels a great disturbance in the force or whatever (i don't like star wars, sorry, so i don't care for Robert)

GARMENT: Robert wears "a floor-length, hooded brown cloak". i don't think this would have been in dress code at my school but like, good for him

(yes i am going to note every garment anyone wears. it brings me joy)

Robert is our introduction to the Happy Hopeless tier of the Tower. "...the very basement of the Popularity Tower. Happy Hopeless are so socially out of it, they don't even know the Tower exists, so they don't notice or care about their less-than-stellar position on it." i was confused as a kid when i read this, because i thought only Cara and Claudia knew about this Tower of theirs, but i guess the idea is that the Happy Hopeless are unaware of the entire idea of high school popularity. which is funny because that's just not meaningfully a real thing in the real world... or perhaps i was just a Happy Hopeless in school (i think both are true lol)

Cara notes that being seen hanging out with a Happy Hopeless on the first day of school would be social suicide. she doesn't think this in light of the Ladder plan, so i think that's just how Cara normally thinks. i suppose it makes sense that she and Claudia are friends.

she now turns her attention to scoping out the Cubby Crews, "little groups so into their own thing that they geek out on it, and everyone assumes that's all they're about. Of course, not all Cubby Crews are created equal. some barely rank above the Happy Hopeless, while others are only that little bit of cachet away from being Populazzi."

Cara and Claudia were a lower-echelon Cubby Crew of their own at their school (C&C were CC...)

Examples of Cubby Crews:

The low-key guys and girls in jeans and ironic T-shirts chatting and laughing easily with the faculty? The Geniuses.

The proud eccentrics in bizarro clothes talking in goofy voices with huge full-body gestures? The Theater Geeks.

i was not a theater kid, but i feel like this doesn't describe the theater kids i knew. i went to a public school with a terrible theater department though

The polished fashion-forwards who reeked of cigarettes and breath mints, sipped lattes, and gave a running catty commentary on everyone around them? The Cosmopolitans.

i do not recognize this as a stereotype, but maybe it was one closer to 2011? anyway, not only did i give a runny catty commentary on the people around me to my online friends in high school, but i used that exact phrase to describe what i was doing, because this line nestled in my head. i don't like cigarettes or coffee or smelling bad though. also how does one reek of breath mints. whatever

The stringy-haired, glazed-eyed androgynes with no books who sat against the wall leaning heavily on one another? The Wasteoids.

i don't know why they aren't just called stoners. anyway i was an "androgyne" (do i need a homophobia tag for use of this phrase? jesus, Cara) who was out of it all the time (not on weed though #brainfog) so maybe this was also me

and finally we learn that just any tight-knit group of friends without a defined Thing (like Cara & Claudia) counts as a Cubby Crew too

i don't get why all these people are on the same level of popularity. i mean it sort of makes sense, i guess, it's just anyone who isn't a complete loser but also not the most popular kids in school. except...

...all of these moved out of the way when a lone guy strode down the hall. If they hadn't moved, I think he'd have plowed right through them without even realizing it... his long black trench coat and the guitar case slung over his shoulder seemed totally out of place, like they belonged to another era. He was different, but he was no outcast. He had a force field of cool around him. People went silent when he got close, then stared and whispered after he passed... DZ stood for DangerZone, the next tier on the Popularity Tower. DangerZones can pull off the "different" thing because they're so dark, troubled, and fascinating. It's tough to call DangerZones popular. They're above labels like that. They do whatever they want, and all the others--from the Happy Hopeless to the Supreme Populazzi--feel honored if a DangerZone wants to talk to them.

i don't even know what to make of these guys. they're just emo kids, right? but like, they're somehow achieving the tortured and mysterious vibe that emo kids want to have. they're achieving it so well that they're not Cubby Crews! they don't even overlap with the Theater Geeks. they're their whole separate thing and the second-coolest clade in school. this is the least realistic part of the whole story to me and i think it renders the entire Tower incomprehensible

(since i compared all the other tiers to my own high school experiences, i should note that i was desperately trying to pull off tortured and mysterious without committing to an emo style, which is even more embarrassing)

Cara turns away from the DangerZone (who, by the way, was also the hottest guy she'd ever seen) and through a window sees the Populazzi, who are all gathered on a tree outside. they're your run of the mill popular kids you see in every YA novel. not that interesting. i think it's funny that the popular kids climb a tree on a regular basis though. i never saw anyone climb a tree on my high school campus. i don't think it would have been allowed

Cara & Claudia viewed the Populazzi at their old school as "too cliquey, too judge-y, and way too tyrannical about keeping the rest of us stuck in our spots on the Tower," which, honestly, i don't think will apply to the Chrysella Populazzi moving forward (sorry to get ahead of myself). anyway Cara reflects that she would be a good Populazzi (she envies the ease and self-confidence they have) because she knows what it's like not to be one, so she'd be nice

OUTFIT: the Supreme Populazzi wears a "cowl neck sleeveless top and jeans," which sounds like a dress code violation to me. but maybe Chrysella is progressive about that sort of thing

OUTFIT: Cara compares her outfit to that of the Supreme Populazzi: "a funky headband, my cute new jeans, my ballet flats, and a fun textured vest over a basic tank." also a dress code violation. anyway i think Cara's outfit sounds just as cute as the SP's but she feels insecure about it

the SP's boyfriend is understood to be the male Supreme Populazzi. he wears "preppy-cool clothes" which also doesn't sound like something a cool kid would have worn but i should probably stop comparing my public school in 2021 to their prep school in 2011

somehow the Supreme Populazzi couple notice Cara looking at their tree from her window and make a disgusted face at her. i'm not sure how they could have seen her unless the tree is right up on the window (which just seems less cool somehow) and they had their noses pressed to the glass

Cara panics and drops to the ground to crawl away from the window

she crawls headfirst into Archer Jain, who is wearing OUTFIT: khakis and a "1920s Gatsby hat" (which i think is meant to be a flat cap). she had noticed him and his hat earlier and knows he is a Theater Geek. she tells him she's crawling around because she lost a contact lens, and he drops to the ground to help her find it, and she is forced to admit that she doesn't wear contacts and avoids explaining her crawling around by joking that at her old school they crawled everywhere. Archer shows himself able to play along with a bit. i love Archer. and i do think their banter, here and throughout the book, is charming and funny

Archer and Cara have the same first period english class! huzzah

"I'll walk you there. Or we could crawl, if it makes you feel more comfortable." "That's okay. I think I'm getting used to the standing-erect thing." Like an idiot I blushed. I waited for Archer to pounce on it.

there's a lot of like... hyperawareness of double entendre in this book, and i just don't find it funny. however this did inspire me to look up the dictionary definition of erection when i was 10. we love sex ed

[supreme-populazzi]

chapter 1

since this is the first chapter, i found it easier to write a little summary before jumping into my commentary on it, which is below the cut.

we open on Cara Leonard in her bedroom with her best friend Claudia, who is telling her that this will be the year everything changes for her. Cara has moved an hour away and is now enrolled at Chrysella Prep, where Claudia believes that Cara has the power to be the Supreme Populazzi... especially if she follows Claudia's plan. Claudia presents The Ladder, which will allow Cara to become more popular by serially dating boys who are a little more popular than the one before, until she eventually dates her way to the top of The Tower. Cara has some doubts about this frankly sociopathic plan, but Claudia says she should do it to prove that all the misfits are no different from the Populazzi. Cara considers this, considers that this project might make attending her new school less frightening, considers just how much fun it might be to be a Populazzi. Claudia swears on the Bell that her plan will work, and Cara finally agrees.

i don't think Claudia has a surname

Claudia tells Cara this will be the year everything changes, Cara pulls out her old journals, where she's written that sentiment every year, to demonstrate to Claudia how ridiculous this idea is. since this happens on page 1, you might think that Cara's journalling would crop up throughout the story, but it doesn't, really. my headcanon is that she gets swept up in all the crazy shit that happens and is too busy to journal. maybe that's why things go so far off the rails later, lack of self-regulation strategies...

we also learn that Cara feels secure keeping her old journals under her bed because her parents know her life is boring and won't bother to snoop. this does not stop people from snooping, but fine

Claudia's quirky best friend trait is that "her mom read Shakespeare to her insanely early, and she took the 'All the world's a stage' thing to heart." she says everything "dramatically" and speaks in iambic pentameter when she gets riled up. (i only know this because later Cara says "i'm pretty sure her last phrase had been in iambic pentameter," and i'm pretty sure Cara's right about that. i wonder if there will be any more Claudia iambic pentameter moments that are unremarked upon. i shall have to keep an eye out)

Cara and Claudia have been friends since the first day of kindergarten, when Cara wet herself and Claudia also wet herself in solidarity. this vivid first impression is part of why they could never be Populazzi

Cara says that Populazzi never feel insecure or get laughed at for odd quirks. notably, she thinks that's the result of being a Populazzi, rather than thinking that you become a Populazzi by being confident and relatively normal.

also Claudia has worn her hair in braids since kindergarten

Cara's parents showed her brochures for Chrysella Prep that advertise "the charter school difference." i just think it's funny that a prep school is choosing to highlight its status as a charter school rather than a prep school

Claudia tells Cara, "You can even be the Supreme Populazzi: The Most Popular Girl in School." i think it's cute that Claudia and Cara have this silly word for the popular girls in their school, and i resent that the author felt the need to define what the Supreme Populazzi is. especially that Claudia is defining it for Cara!

GARMENT: Claudia reaches into her "fuchsia, faux-leather shoulder bag." this sounds awful but i love it for her. in this ridiculous bag is a "huge, overstuffed yellow binder," which means this has got to be, like, a messenger bag. a fuchsia faux leather messenger bag is crazy to me

in the binder is information about The Ladder, which allows one to climb from tier to tier of the Popularity Tower. when i was a kid i loved that these two had taxonomized the kids in their class in this way. i was so sad to learn that middle and high school weren't that socially stratified at all. i wanted to taxonomize my peers!!!! (obviously this concept isn't unique to this book at all, but i never watched Mean Girls or High School Musical or any of the really famous uses of it, and also, there's a real sense that the Tower in this book was just a project Cara and Claudia undertook together, as opposed to being universally understood, and that really appealed to me.)

the Tower tiers are Happy Hopeless, Cubby Crew, DangerZone, Penultimate Populazzi, and Supreme Populazzi. these names are silly, obviously. but i still find it cute. i could never hate the Tower sorry

anyway, in C&C's original conception of the Tower you couldn't move from one tier to the other, so Claudia's Ladder idea is really radical for that reason

"That's the beauty of a brand-new school!" Claudia said. "You can be anyone, including exactly what each guy you target thinks is the perfect girlfriend." "So I lie to these guys, use them, and that makes me popular?" "You don't lie. You highlight different aspects of your actual personality. And you don't use anyone. They're guys. Guys are psyched to have girlfriends. You'll be helping them. Just like you, they'll be more desirable when they're part of a couple."

Claudia is a sociopath

at this point Cara contemplates that she's never had a boyfriend, nor seen a penis. Cara seems pretty aware that there will be a sexual component to this plan. it's not dwelt on here, she and Claudia only talk about how she will date these people, but the penis contemplation, i think, makes it clear that there is a sexual undertone to all this

Claudia had seen a penis, but it was attached to her first cousin Rob, who's fourteen and a total dork. His idea of biting satire is to tape googly eyes and paper elephant ears on the front of his jeans, then let "the trunk" hang out of his fly.

this is just a throwaway joke--you don't need to remember Rob, he's never mentioned again--but i didn't get it as a kid and i'm not even sure i get it as an adult. what the fuck, Rob?

anyway, the massive yellow binder that Claudia pulled out of her fuchsia faux leather messenger bag contains information about the Ladder. i really don't get why such a giant binder was needed. when Cara asks when she had time to print out all the "reams of magazine articles, written notes, and Xeroxes of book and newspaper pages," Claudia just says she had time on her hands while Cara packed for the move. i think the stuff in the binder is just examples of women becoming more famous as a result of relationships with famous men. the story of Cinderella is mentioned, which i don't think really works... i mean, i guess Cinderella saw a rise in social station because she married a prince, but i also just think that's how royal families work, it's not that cutting of a sociological observation. Claudia also asks if anyone would care about yoko ono's art if not for john lennon, which i resent (i acknowledge that her relationship with lennon made her more famous, but she wasn't a nobody before meeting him, come on now, Claudia). anyway, it seems like a lot of frankly sexist examples to support her idea. i don't think Cara ever sits down and properly reads the "handwritten notes" in this binder. i'm actually not even sure if Cara even owns the binder or if Claudia just took it back home after this conversation lol

Claudia also defines the metaphorical Ladder as practicing at music or sports with people who are a little bit better than you. why is this Ladder more metaphorical than the lying to men one? who am i to question Claudia i guess

an example Claudia gives of the metaphorical Ladder is a photoshopped image of her practicing cello with yo yo ma. i don't think this is a strong pro-Ladder argument, i think she just felt like photoshopping herself practicing cello with yo yo ma. and who can blame her

the Bell is a mini liberty bell and a pack of tastykakes on Cara's bedside table. these two do not swear on the Bell lightly

[supreme-populazzi]

okay and the last thing i want to talk about is elise allen. this is the only YA novel she's published under her own name. most of her ouvre is picture book tie-ins to disney movies, a couple of original novels for a younger audience, and also she appears to have ghost written a YA series for hillary duff (some of the language i'm seeing says "co-writer" but i think the original arrangement was a ghostwriter one). also she grew up in philadelphia (which is where Populazzi takes place) and looks a lot like the way that cara is described. i don't think any of this is spectacularly interesting but it's here if anyone was wondering

[supreme-populazzi]

since i was on the amazon page i decided to peruse the reviews. i want to respond to them but i guess i should probably present the book to you before arguing with a bunch of reviewers from 2012. what i will say is that multiple people seem to think the title is a portmanteau of popular and paparazzi, and it just isn't. it's just a cutesy play on the word popular. you can think it's cringe, but it's not meaningfully related to the word paparazzi

[supreme-populazzi]

okay not only did they SEO the title but the amazon description seems to have had an AI synopsis added to it?

the top description, the one in normal paragraphs, that was always there, but those bullet points are ai generated and tacked on! what the hell

[supreme-populazzi]

anyway i love this stupid cover. i want the photoshopped Populazzi necklace

[supreme-populazzi]

i searched the title on my kindle to redownload it and they fucking SEO'd the title?

[ID: Populazzi: A Contemporary Teen Novel About a Twisted Social Experiment and the Quest for Popularity /end ID]

it was not called that when i bought it lmao