Tumblr Survivor: Generations

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 13: “Here’s a Sappy Quote to End My Time Here”- Jakey(Part 2)

I'M IN FINAL FOUR!!! As it stands now, I am tied for highest placing Kiwayu returnee with Sierra and Catherine, so that's super exciting. I'm really playing up the whole, "nobody thinks I played at all, drag me to the end!" I'm never SAYING that I never played, I'm saying OTHER PEOPLE said I haven't played, so that come FTC, nobody cal get me on that. I've got a plan going into FTC, hopefully I can actually make that plan all come together, and pull out the win, but who knows. I've got at least one locked vote, probably at least two. Depending on how I handle this last tribal, I could have three or four. It all comes down to if they see my game as valid. I see it that way, but it's not my perception that counts. It's the jury's.

addendum: During tribal, Jeremy called Shareef out on his "stupid gameplay" and not me, so things might just be looking up for lil ol me

HOW AM I STILL HERE. THE TUMBLR AURVIVOR GOD HAS GIVEN ME 10000 CHANCES THIS GAME AND I AM NOT WILLING TO WASTE IT!! I AM THE UNDERDOG NOW SO WOOF WOOF THIS DOGGY READY TO SEND SOMEONE TO THE DOG HOUSE THIS WEEK AND TAKE MY SPOT IN THE FINAL 3

welp my computer broke so who knows if i'll be able to do another video confessional. i might just do one on my phone. but anyway i got shareef and monty to vote out jules which is gr8 because now my plan to bring jeremy to the end with shareef and i is in full swing!!!!!!!

honestly... idfk bc shareef is never going to vote out jeremy so i'd have to go to a tiebreaker with monty and jeremy dksjflkj jeremy better win this time god. but best case scenario is jeremy wins final immunity and shareef is forced to vote out monty. as much as i would love to have that record with queendace it's hoenstly smarter for my game to "throw" the immunity to jeremy (if im given the chance, like if we're the last 2 standing in pressure cooker). if thats not the case then i'll just win to set that record and let jeremy compete in the tiebreaker. like yeah whatever he'll get jules's vote but lets be real i'd never get her vote in the first place.

ummmm yeah idk!!!!!!!!! if jeremy wins this game shl;skdlkj god... that would be.... so sad could the jury be that bitter??????? ik tumblr survivor juries are usually yikes like i mean pris beat lydia in a unanimous vote so anything can happen.

me when Jules demanded information after I flipped

Lmfao @ shareef basically using rights of passage to get votes. Its so obvious yet i dont think he can win. Honestly jakey has to go and the only way i have a shot of getting him out is winning this immunity tonight. I dont care if i have to stay up all night and be misserable at work tomorrow i am not having my fate be back in the hands of flips mcgee, jakey i win comps cuz my social games sucks, and mj im playing tumblr survivor?? Its me vs the other three so game on

Final thought: Shareef just made the dumbest decision in tumblr survivor history by taking a duo to final 3 but he isnt getting my vote anyways so i dont care!! But anyways i am proud of how i played and honored to be the 4th place robbed king two seasons in a row like how iconic. And for it not to be fire this time is a #blessing. I hope you all enjoyed my confessionals and just know i tried to the very end and i never gave up. I do think i played 100 tunes better this time around but this is the end of the tumblr survivor run ( for now). Thanks mandy and ryan and hope shareef falls down first (kiss emoji) (wave emoji)

So I was just BLINDSIDED by the hosts. That was a good twist. I'm now standing here, waiting for the right time to give in, because I lowkey have a final two with both of the people left and am here for it. I really hope Shareef wins immunity and takes out Jakey, so that I can have his vote. Then, I'll have (I think) Trevor, Liana, Brian, Jakey, maybe Jeremy, and maybe Phil, so that's 4 pretty much guaranteed and then from there two to maybe get, and then it's a fight. So like, this is looking real good for me, I think. And even if Jakey does win immunity and he takes me to FTC, I get to lose against a close friend of mine who has fought this game and would be a great winner. So like, I'm pretty satisfied with how this is turning out. Go us! (Party for final three new/middle/old, and Shareef finally being loyal to an alliance.)

fuck now im rly considering voting out shareef like kjfdlkdsjf my case would be so much better next to monty since he rly didnt do anything. i just dont know how bitter this damn jury is going to be. i think i have a good shot against monty maybe more than i do against shareef. i already promised shareef i was taking him and he would literally be so heartbroken if i didnt take him FUCKKK THIS SUCKSSSSS WHY AM I IN THIS POSITION im going to go crazy and i only have 40 minutes to decide. damn.

So, like, friend wise, I'm fine with Jake, Just putting it out there incase he doesn't believe me. But I've known my chances of winning were slim, so him taking one of the biggest threats to the end is just...bleh. And then I'm like, welp, this hurts you more than it hurts me, it's literally your loss. So, like, ok. I wasn't too upset about being voted out, but this ponderosa chat is driving me up the fucking wall. Everyone is like, you never talked, and then they're super annoying in the ponderosa chat, and I'm just sitting here thinking, "maybe I didn't talk to you because you all drive me insane, and having a one on one conversation would make me want to gouge my eyes out, please never talk to me." except phil. he's chill. and jeremy, i guess i've lumped him in there all season, so i'll clarify that. but the rest, i'd be just fine not really talking to ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Me looking for this social game that MJ played that everyone keeps talking about

http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/glee/images/2/2f/Looking.gif/revision/latest?cb=20130909233657

So, MJ doesn't really know shit about what happened on our side. SO! Liana has been filling me in on the shit he's been saying about me in Ponderosa, so I'm real glad I voted him out. My petty ass feels good about that. So basically, he doesn't like me, and tbh, the feeling is totally mutual... The confessional earlier about being annoyed at the Ponderosa chat is mostly @ MJ, and then the other two by association. Yeah... that's about it.

well here is my last confessional of tumblr survivor!!! no matter what anyone says im really proud of how i ended my tumblr survivor journey. i tied the immunity record and improved on my social and strategic game that it allowed me to make it all the way to the end after 5 tries. in final tribal council i definitely didnt think i showed off the game that i actually played and the pressure of the whole live tribal council thing definitely got to me. i always knew it was going to be rough just because i've always been rough at public speaking and in the moment i basically forget everything i was gonna say and yeah it was bad. amanda kimmel realness honestly. im not very confident after that. not confident at all, actually. i think im going to get 2nd but at least it's an improvement and i think i did all i could. if one weak emotional decision at the end of this game cost me the win, then so be it. i can't change anything and i have to live with that decision i made of voting out monty. yeah i cant wait for this to be over tbh this game has made my anxiety soooo bad but it was a lot of fun. thx ryan and mandy my 2 original hosts ending it out for me!! i luv yall and i hope i made all of old school proud! this community has been with me for 3 damn years!! ive had so many laughs and so many cries. i love it and im so happy i stumbled upon this little niche. its sad to leave but happy with the way the book has ended. heres a sappy quote to end my time here. in the words of aaron copland, "the promise of living, the promise of growing, the promise of ending is labor and sharing our loving."

With FTC over there was one question really burned in my mind and how I answered. I know this won't be aired till after the confessionals are released but I felt it was really important to say.

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 13: “Here’s a Sappy Quote to End My Time Here”- Jakey (Part 1)

So. Everything went according to plan. Austin is gone, which was mine (and everyone else's) biggest competition. My one biggest asset in this game is how under appreciated and under valued my game is by the old school. "Don't start playing till final 6 next time." Girl, did you see my premerge game? I played two idols, survived six tribals, and this is the first round any votes have counted against me. I'm assuming it was Jules who put that voting confessional down, and frankly, I haven't seen her play at all either. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ So please, donut come for me. Also, I love the complete contradiction between Shareefs tribal answer and his vote. Yes! Burn those bridges!!

OK AUSTIN THAT WAS THE DUMBEST MOVE I HAVE EVER SEEN!! I REALLY WANTED TO BE LOAYL TO YOU BUT YIKESS!! HAVE FUN IN PONDEROSA WITH THE REST OF THE RATS WHO TRIED TO TAKE ME OUT BUT FAILED MISERABLY:). AND OK HERE IS HOW I REALLY FEEL ABOUT EVERYONE WHO IS LEFT CUZ I AM LIVID!!!

Monty: WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU AND WHERE HAVE YOU EVEN BEEN BEFORE THIS WEEK?? CUZ I KNOW ITS NOT PLAYING THIS GAME!! THE GOAT OF THE SEASON BAHH FREAKIN BAHH

JAKEY: FAKE STUPID HEAD!! HE HAS LITRERALLY DONE NOTHING BUT WIN CHALLENGES BUT HEY CONGRATS ON BEING ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE VOTE FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER IN HISTORY!! A FLOP WHO IS NOT GETTING MY VOTE

JULES: A PURE CINAMON ROLL AND ONLY LOYAL BITCH ON THIS ISLAND LOVE HA

SHAREEF: DOESNT DESERVE TO WIN, FAKE AF, YADA YADA YADA!!!!

I AM ON MY OWN NOW AND MAD SO DONT MESS WITH ME OR CRAZY JEREMY WILL COME OUT AND CAUSE ALL SORTS OF MAYHEM

I litterally hate everyone here!! And jsjsjs shareef yelling at me gtg!! I litterally cant wait to get 5th place and join jury and vote for not jakey or monty!! Yeup and this challenge yikes i gtg

Well seeing how i am on the bottom and no one seems to want to work with me anymore ill be hosting my tumblr survivor funeral on Wednesday wear something nice and i want a nice eulogy from all of you!! Ill supply the rice and refreshments

#exposed #ripjeremy? #chugchug #jeremysfuneral etc

Final words i will ever say to shareef: (10:02 pm june 27th 2016) Thats fine have fun taking the two you dont mind losing too aka jakey who hasnt done shit besides win challenges and monty who barely even played and did whatever jakey told him!! Ill have fun in jury bye

CANT WAIT TO READ ALL THE HATE CONFESSIONALS I AM PROBABLY GETTING RN

I love that the second Jeremy and Jules start ranting the minute they're out of the loop on a vote. Like, welcome to my world. I've been here the whole merge, get comfortable and stop your bitching, please. It's really not that bad, and if you're a good player, you can get yourself back in power, and to the end. So, just stop now. I'm over you. BYE!

rip me when i completely flop in that immunity challenge~!

also, i made a lil rant about the last vote. i wanted to post it in the tag but mandy wouldnt let me.

austin: what the fuck, you dumbass? i love you, but you try to fuq our alliance over and then get voted out? who does that??? HOW did you even do that?????

monty: congrats on finally showing up to the game! good to see ya!

jake: honestly im not even mad at you for this! i know better than to trust you and now you know better than to trust me! lol @ that time i got your entire alliance to vote the way i told you to, though. that was so cute. ps you can say my social game sux all you want, but all youve got going for you is a slew of challenge wins and a tiny lil crew that gets smaller by the day (plus one unloyal buttface).

shareef: next time you think youre being screwed, maybe take the time to use your words like the grown ass man you are instead of making assumptions. maybe listen to the person who’s been honest with you this entire game instead of the people who fucked you over! i literally wrote my closest ally’s name down because you suggested it. im mad, im hurt, im disappointed, im out for blood.

@ the closest ally whose name i wrote down: inevitable or not, im so sorry and ive been absolutely disgusted with myself ever since then.

if you fuckers need me, ill be on my tuk tuk!

When you forget to reset your alarm and will most likely flop in the challenge, but it's ok, because Jakey said he flopped harder, and he'd probably be the target before you so you just have to wait... 🙃

Rip jeremy

Jake won immunity and I'm so proud of him!!!! The chance of us both losing is super high so the fact that he could tie the record or potentially break it is super important to him and I'm just so happy for him thats_my_best_friend.gif. Also this means that he's playing his idol on me and I'm guaranteed top 4. Which is nice because it allows me some room to better my jury management as much as I can. I'm not misleading Jules or Jeremy and being as honest with them given the situation. Right now Jake and I are trying to decide who to vote out, we told Monty Jeremy but we want to discuss it just the two of us and hammer out the pros and cons. I would not be surprised at all if someone whipped out an idol that wasn't Jake so we are trying to make sure the votes land on me and not Monty so if we voted for the wrong person it would be an iconic 0-0 and we could vote out the other on the revote. We have to prepare that it is a final 3 and we are aware that who ever we bring will most likely win (goat noises heard in the background). Jake refuses to let Jules win, I refuse to let Jeremy win....so congrats Monty...

holy shit i won my 5th immunity in a row??? and i won by only one minute holy smokes did i get lucky on that one. after results jeremy got a little salty hahaha and he told me to shut up and stuff like damn boy welcome to the game! but now i have a really tough decision ahead of me.

first thing is first, jeremy or jules? even though i do think jeremy has the ability to pull out competition wins and jules hasn't really been showing that she still got it, i need jules to go. heres what im thinking. as much as i would love for a final 3 of me monty and shareef, i don't know if thats the best end game scenario for me. the way i see it, jeremy aint ever voting for my ass and monty secures liana and most likely trevor's vote after he finds out i was behind him getting out.

so im thinking of final 3 with jeremy and shareef for the reason of securing liana's vote, trevor's vote, and monty's vote. i think those votes are going to be very important so why would i want to go to the end with monty, a person who cant even vote for me and someone who is going to automatically get 2 jury votes that COULD be mine!

i really need to convince shareef that jules is the best option to go this round so i even have the option of TAKING jeremy to the end over monty. i wouldn't want to take jules because she's a girl and just could easily get votes cause of all her friends and she didn't piss people off and it's stupid but this jury is going to be really fucking bitter i can tell.

if shareef really thinks he has no shot of winning then why doesnt he help me win? i feel like i have a damn good shot. i just need to convince shareef at final four that monty needs to go over shareef. i'll cry on call with shareef i'll do anything i have to do but i thought long and hard about this and i feel like this is the right thing to do. so help me god if jeremy wins over shareef and i LMAO i would literally delete my wiki page and my skype and act like i was never apart of this community. but would he??? damn thats where this all gets so damn tricky like i dont even wanna RISK LOSING TO JEREMY LKDJFL like at least monty is a good person and knows he didnt do shit. damn.

this is hard as fuck :/ i feel like the wrong decision could cost me this game. do i f3 monty of jeremy monty or jeremy monty or jeremy monty or jeremy monty or jeremy

monty or jeremy

monty or jeremy monty or jeremy monty or jeremy

monty or jeremy monty or jeremy

monty or jeremy

THIS GAME IS TOO FUCKING SCRESSFUL

so, it's either me or jeremy going home tonight. for real this time. (unless something changes between now and then but we'll see.) no one's been talking to me today, which leads me to believe that it's me.

fuqing shareef.

anyway! i'm voting for jeremy tonight. i told him that i'd vote shareef, but that'd be a wasted vote. if jeremy's smart, he'll vote me, too, which is fine.

IF i survive this round (and thats like, the world's biggest if), i'll have beaten my best placement, which i REAALLLY want at this point. even if i can't win. (although i mostly just want to win. a best placement of 1st would be very nice.) but if i survive this round, i  h a v e  to win immunity next, otherwise i wont even make it to the final 3, much less to a win.

im so annoyed at myself for that challenge flop. i was set up to win. i'm GOOD at endurance. it's just about determination to win. but i skipped the last 3 minute interval and lost it. so i guess it's actually determination, organization, and the ability to recognize that 12 minutes is not the same as 15 minutes. that was honestly the challenge that i had the best chance of winning, and i blew it.

maybe the next one will be a flash game. please let the next one be a flash game. were we warned that there wouldnt be any flash games this season? if so, i missed that memo.

I have to remember Jules is going to jury, so I'm putting the voting confessional I really want to put here in order to not piss her off, even though the same consideration was not taken for me.

Jules - Here is some advise. Actually play, even if you only start at final 6

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 12: “Its So Fragile!” - Shareef

Jaffgass coming to a tumblr survivor game in a city near you

Well that's all she wrote! I love them all honestly and it's the best move because I probably would've beaten them all at the end (except MAYBE Jakey or Austin). I'm proud of the game I played and I went out swinging. Hopefully I've made an impression on you people because the next time I return, all y'alls ass is grass.

god im just like.... ready to get out austin and jules but obviously they arent going to vote for me in the end. i feel like this jury is going to be really bitter and just vote personally and if i bring monty to the final 3 with shareef and i, liana and trevor are going to vote for monty and shareef could possibly beat me. splitting up my potential jury votes is not what i want so i need jeremy next to me in that final 3. i love monty but i cant have these secured jury votes he has next to me when they can easily be mine. quite honestly honest i think shareef  could beat me despite all his betrayals. so im thinking of taking jeremy and monty to the final 3. it depends if i win final immunity because shareef would def vote with me in final 4 if i lost immunity but if i won i think i could make it 3-1 for shareef. anyway this is just a random thought im having since im thinking long term about my game, unlike some people. HINT HINT!!!!!!!!!!!!! [6/25/2016 10:02:54 PM] jakey: but whats gonna happen if I win immunity [6/25/2016 10:02:56 PM] jakey: whats your plan [6/25/2016 10:03:17 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: well, im assuming at this point that you have an idol. so tbh idk! [6/25/2016 10:03:27 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: im hoping that i win. [6/25/2016 10:03:41 PM] jakey: lol [6/25/2016 10:03:45 PM] jakey: great plan! [6/25/2016 10:03:51 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: i know, right?!?!?! [6/25/2016 10:04:10 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: ive said it before and ill say it again: tryna take it one round at a time!

[25/06/2016 10:51:20] Shareef: liana coming for me in the tag oh wow oh wow [25/06/2016 10:51:34] Austin: I liked it [25/06/2016 10:53:21] Shareef: I know you fake binch [25/06/2016 10:58:04] Austin: Gotta secure the jury votes bitch!!!

Fuck fuck fuck! Jakey COULD NOT win immunity. It's like the only thing I wanted. If he didn't win immunity, then he would've gone home, and now I'm the only one against the numbers. Like, even if he had lost, I would've voted with him, but they would've split and voted him on the revote. So like, ughghghgh. Now I'm pretty sure I'm going home, and like, I'd just come up with a game plan for the rest of this game. 🙃

[5:44:56 PM] jakey: any plans now? [5:54:38 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: yep! [5:56:29 PM] jakey: nice hahahahahah honey you got a big storm comin'

its genuinely funny how jules and austin and jeremy think im so bad at the game and i need immunities to survive KDJFLKFJL like ohhhh boy do they have a big storm coming. also why is winning immunities a bad thing? it's not my damn fault i got shareef to get you guys to vote out mj so i can have an easier time winning?? okay i guess it is my fault but :~) im sick of winning immunities being seen as a weakness. im winning cause i can. if i couldn't win, i wouldn't. im not going to throw an immunity challenge just because people think i need them to survive. no, im winning them because i can. these immunities have not been easy and i've worked my ass off in every single one of them. HELL I SPENT 3.5 HOURS ON A LOGIC PUZZLE JUST TO WIN. I PRACTICED HUNDREDS OF MAZES BEFORE HAND. I SAT AT MY COMPUTER AND WAS READY FOR EACH ENDURANCE QUESTION. just because im putting in more effort than you, doesn't mean i should be faulted for it. i just think its so funny how they have no idea shareef has been working for me this whole time and doing all the work without getting any real blood on my hands. i know i would have been safe not winning because shareef would have always went out on a limb to save me. hell, winning immunities is 10x more important in this game because you go to retirement to find idols and stuff. whats even better about having the opportunity to find one is hindering others from having that opportunity so i can make my moves without idol paranoia. you know what, i get a lot of shit in this game because i have to play up the whole "in the minority im desperate for anything" act and its great how pompous the "majority" has become. well everything is about to change as we systematically take them out of this game.

I just realized I'm pretty sure I forgot to submit this before I was voted out:

So I just got off a call with Shareef where he essentially spelled out that I am going next and there’s nothing I can do about it. We’ll see. He showed those cards too early I think and now I have all day tomorrow to really sell how dangerous Shareef is. Also Jakey is telling me to be careful and I’m like BINCH. YOURE NOT THE ONE WHO IS IN TROUBLE SO YOU CAN SIT DOWN. If I successfully flip Jeremy and Shareef ends up going home its going to feel SO DAMN GOOD FUCK. I’ve made what I think to be a very secure f2 with Jeremy (especially since I was planning on taking him anyway since we all have a great chance of beating him) Word okay so scrap that plan, now I’m hoping to get Austin to vote out Jules with me Jakey and Monty but I’m… idk I feel like the real best move would be to vote for Monty. Okay fuck except they would never split it that’s stupid. Fuck ok. So Jeremy is for sure lying about wanting to vote Shareef but thats fine. I may have fucked up by coming on so strong with him, but oh well. Hopefully we can still secure Austin voting for Jules. I’m feeling more and more like there’s really nothing I can do. I think with me, Jakey and Austin, I need to talk to Austin one on one and make sure he knows I want to move forward with him as an individual, I’m not Jakey’s partner (though no, I do not want to be at the end with Austin). Next day: Okay I wasn’t entirely considering voting out austin but I think Jules is actually down because she can’t be sure the others aren’t lying to her, especially after the MJ vote. I went to her and was basically like, it’s between you or me lets change that. And I know I still have Monty and Jakey so as long as she isn’t lying I know I’m good. 

Basically I'm fucked because someone from my alliance is going home tonight be use fuck jakey's idol 

Im just gonna do monty cuz i am working a double and too tired to do evil scheming and stuff yawn tear cry i hate work

I HAVE EXCLUSIVE, NEVER BEFORE SEEN FOOTAGE OF THE FINAL SIX!!!

blah blah blah another confessional of jules freaking out about jake's potential idol! tonight's going to go one of many ways! 1. JAAFGASS alliance will all vote Monty, Monty and Jake will vote someone (probs me), jake doesn't play an idol, Monty goes. 2. JAAFGASS alliance will all vote Monty, Monty and Jake will vote someone (probs me), jake DOES play an idol, someone (probably me) goes 3. I'm being lied to and the vote is 5-1 and I go 4. 3-3 tie? idk. so many possibilities, but let's hope for scenario 1! im very close to my best placement now!

so the move that i've been planning for dearly so long is finally going to happen. so monty, shareef, and i are going to vote for austin tonight and jeremy is voting for monty and austin is voting for jeremy. don't know if jules will be voting for monty or jeremy tonight it depends, but most likely she is going to vote for monty even though it doesn't matter. and i'm going to pull off a 3-2-1 hahahhaa. this is assuming monty is a loyal heaux even tho i'm pretty sure he is. i've worked hard instilling a final 2 into him so i'm really praying he doesn't lie to me. i've been lying to him about having an idol and i'm going to have to tell him tonight that i "just found it" and get the receipts from when i found the idol and just change the dates and times. but yeah hahahaha jeremy/jules/austin have no idea this is happening and they'll finally be blindsided and it'll be glorious. they think i was dumb for not going with them in the merge and it's just funny how dumb they think i am tbh. austin should know better from redemption island honestly lol. his final 2 was jessica but jessica's final 2 was me and the same thing is happening now with shareef. i kinda feel bad "playing" shareef but i don't want to lose!!! i hope it's a fucking final 2 so i can go to the end with monty cause if ppl actually vote for monty over me i'll quit life. i need both monty and shareef in the final 4 cause they'd never vote against me just in case i do lose that immunity. if it is a final 3 ugh... im going to have to get monty to go to a tiebreaker with jeremy i cant have monty next to me in a final 3 because he has trevor and liana's votes when they could easily be mine since they're so bitter towards shareef. but yeah im not sure. i might have to vote out shareef at final 4 if it's a final 3 but idk jeremy is so unpredictable and will probably throw his entire game away just because he doesnt want to work with me. also next vote shareef wants immunity and im like ???? no i want the record !!! im not going to throw any immunity to him because last time i did that (in lost city) i got voted out sooooo no thanks. im putting everything into these immunity challenges even though i could survive without them, it's much easier for MY plans if i just win them to secure my safety no matter what. but yeah i feel so bad bc shareef rly wants to f2 with me but i cant even defend my game if he's sitting next to me?? like people will just say he did everything and i just won the challenges. like yeah i made shareef do all my dirty work for me by getting all the blood on his hands and not mine, but i can't argue that with him sitting right next to me. god it sucks. but i'll worry about that when the time comes. for now i just need to get ready for austin's blindside because the fallout will be great to watch. grab your popcorn, folks.

JAKEY FINALLY FUCKING FOUND AN IDOL!!!!!!! Now, does he use it now, or does he wait one more round.? How paranoid ARE we? So many questions. So few answers. This will be a shit show to say the least.

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 11: “You Signed Up To Play Survivor. Play it Bitch.” -Jakey

SOOOOO WE DID IT!!!!!!!! There he go... I can't believe MJ never tried to get me to flip like Shareef said he would. And I can't believe he ended another one of our 3 message conversations! Crazy... So, I'm still loving voting out the fan faves https://vine.co/v/MlI2JXh97Jz Gotta find the rest!! Gotta vote them out! I'm starting to feel very irrelevant rn, and I have the feeling people will be trying to drag me to the end as a goat. I can accept that, but then again, I could have fun. For a while I could never really get past 7th place, so now whenever I get at that point, I kinda go crazy. If I'm going to be dragged to the end as a goat, might as well have some fun with it.

So the plan worked andd i am feeling mixed emotions but yikess at mj basically shading austin . Its was just yikes. Now ughh at touchy subjects. I always win the bad stuff like biggest goat or playing for second and yada yada yada. But now i need to win this and make sure i am 100 percent safe

boy, oh boy. so, last night was not a high point in Jules' Tumblr Survivor Career. i recently switched to the night shift at work, so while i can have skype on my work computer, i'm not technically allowed to, so i can like, sneakily have skype open. but most strategizing has to be done during the day before i go to work. so i'm at work last night, and i get a message from shareef around 8:00, an hour before the vote, asking me if i can call. luckily, i was going on my dinner break, so i was able to get on skype for a minute. the plan for the vote was for me, shareef, mj, austin, and jeremy to vote for brian and hope to god jake didn't have an idol to play. shareef informs me, though, that the vote has changed to mj, and that jeremy and austin have flipped. so im freaking out because like, i've been thinking that i didnt want to go to the end with mj, but i wanted to make sure that we had a really solid majority before voting him out. so i was very much Not Ready for that. but shareef and i couldnt think of a way to save him- he didn't have an idol or anything. so i told mj that it was happening, and then voted for him. it's been a day since then, and i honestly feel like such a sellout for writing his name down. was it the right move? probably. but i feel awful, and i wish more than anything that i could go back and stop myself from changing my vote from brian to mj at last minute. it's like, we've been tight in this game literally from the beginning, and even though i couldn't have done anything to save him, i didn't need to write his name down. not this time, anyway. bby mj, im so sorry, and you deserved better. i mean, i was still plotting your demise or w/e, but not like this. hopefully he'll understand.

BUT that's over, you know. gotta keep moving forward. this is right around the point that i generally get voted out in games, so im pretty nervous. by all logic, it should be me next, so im trying to do well on this immunity. i love touchy subjects, but im not exactly good at it.

austin and jeremy say they're still good with me and shareef but... they have to understand that my trust for them both has dropped out the window, essentially. i had a call with austin for a little while last night, where he kind of reassured me that we were still good, and that jake or, barring that, brian would go next, but we'll see. i cant know that he's trustworthy until we see a vote. and a vote could be me.

so basically, to sum up: -i feel like a complete sellout for voting for mj -touchy subjects is a cute challenge -could be me next -i still really want to go to retirement!

goddamn, touchy subjects brings out a narcissistic streak in me. oh well!!

(also, the only person i actually trusted in this game is gone so i guess i just get to talk to confessionals now)

So apparently i am gulible but people are surprised i am here but yet i have the best shot at making final 3 but i am playing for second yet i am in the best position but i also think i am in control. What kind of icon teas. Ugh i hate touchy subjects and gross jakey one:( he wins fucking everything like does he have like rabbit feet in his asshole which makes him so lucky. Anyways i think the plan is to get out brian but they are gonna like fake a recept saying we want monty out in case jakey has an idol(which he prob does cuz he goes to the retirement home more then my cougar aunt looking for a new rich husband) but anyways i hope this works and like apparently jakey wants to take me to final three so i am just gonna play along cuz like i cant say no??? But really no i want you out dude you gotta go bye!! Anyways i hope this works and yeah

Jakey and everyone wants to work with me now?? What is this? So basically its two groups of three and i am like in the middle and ugh this is too stressful for me. Why cant like it just be we all agree someone has to go why do we need sides ugh welcome to survivor i guess. Jakey being so nice to me when he prob voted me like fakest person ans uglies flop or something and like jules prob wants me dead yer she acting really nice ugh idk what i am doing but i gotta he smart and think for me whats the best move cuz out if rn idk

LMFAO so austin and jules are sitting here telling me theyre going to vote for each other and even faking their conversations to send me and im sitting here like........... LMFAO yall think im really that dumb?

so after shareef confirms that with me im literally dying laughing at this point. im talking to jeremy and i really wanna solidify something with him. right now its not looking too good tbh because shareef was telling me that he leaked some of our convo to them and then jeremy lied to me and said that he hasnt been talking to them even though i know they were all on a damn call.

sooooooooooo right now i think brian's going to have to go.and i'll have to vote in minority (again ahhahaah) and then i'll have everyones jury vote !!! until i tell them all that i had just as much of a hand in their ~evictions as anyone else

but yeah okay so brian will prob go this vote and then next vote theyre gonna wanna split it between me and monty... so im telling shareef that is the time to flip on them and get out austin. then at final 5 we have an idol and a 3-2 majority anyway. so if people catch on and want shareef or myself out depending on immunity, we have that idol to make it into the final 4.

and then at that point it's up to me who i want to stay loyal to and ugh it'll be really fucking hard cause i love both monty and shareef so at that point it'd come down to who i can actually beat in the end.

GOD OKAY I NEED TO RANT ABOUT JEREMY LSDFJLKDJ

LIKE WHY ARE YOU SO FAKE AND STUPID???? WHY WOULD YOU VOTE WITH THEM SLDKFJDLKFJLK YOURE NOT GOING TO WIN ANYWAY SO WHY DONT YOU ACTUALLY MAKE MOVES AND HAVE A CASE TO MAKE WHILE YOU'RE SITTING AT THE END??? I DONT UNDERSTAND GOATS AND I NEVER WILL. YOU SIGNED UP TO PLAY SURVIVOR. PLAY IT, BITCH.

me: *plays multiple idols, and doesn't go home even though i probably should have several times, and is generally playing a decent game* everyone: 

me: *makes merge and doesn't IMMEDIATELY spill my heart and soul to every person left in the game* every person left in the game: "monty?" 

...I'm not bitter

So brian came to me about getting shareef out and honestly it makes ao much sense. I already have blood on my hands from the mj vote so what alittle more blood this week. And brian seems like he does have my back so i have alot to think about!!

me writing down austin's name tonight knowing damn well he aint going anywhere but should be SHOOK for next round.

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 10: “I Hate Playing With Stupid Players That Do Dumb Shit For Literally No Reason.”- MJ

whew.....Liana throwing Shareef under the bus? ...........Jakey being salty after tribal?  

i am ........in love....with these concepts like......

Was Liana speaking the #truth? possibly...but she didnt....change anything(: she probably shouldve talked to me abt it but....whatever....

and now jakey's being passive aggressive and shady in the merge tribe chat as if he didnt literally put himself in the position that hes in right now? like he sided with new school and went after nathan.....and then phil.......AND THEN lied to us once merge hit..............voted with that group of people TWO MORE TIMES....and now he's salty about it?

like if jake was just honest and straightforward with me...and DIDNT go against the old school alliance.....he very well could be ...sitting relatively right now...but he made his choice, and quite frankly he sided with the wrong people so...he needs to be...mad at ......himself...

on a more positive not, im ecstatic to have made it to final 8. i think this is the point where people are gonna get a lil more greedy and a lil more selfish and start itching to make moves....myself included. UNFORTUNATELY though, i know that i dont necessarily NEED to make a move this round...first priority is to maybe win immunity and DEFINITELY get jakey out, which should be relatively easy, but we'll see.

LIANA

HAD AN IDOL

WHEN I WAS THROWING SHIT????

IM SO MAAAAAAAD

Okay so I wrote that before tribal. I was 1% thinking maybe Jeremy would vote with us after our talk but no luck.

Ily Liana and thank god I’m basically guaranteed your jury vote.

This challenge is also crackt I'm so fucked.

Okay Liana is gone and this is my opportunity to play the dead whimpering little dog who is now a non threat in the game. This challenge ha been wild but I think at the moment I am the one most likely to beat MJ. I wish we were going later into the night thoughOkay jk maybe it will be Jakey again.Also I had a GREAT talk with Austin and I think the people on their side were serious about working with me once Liana was gone. His thoughts are mainly MJ can’t win this immunity (I agree) Jakey is playing too wild (I agree, but to Austin this is a negative, for me its a positive because he’s loyal o me plus I win sitting beside him) Jules is boring (true) Shareef is the next biggest threat after those two (yup) It’s kind of wild how I went from feeling like I was FUCKED completely to actually feel ing marginally confident about my position moving forward. Because I am sort of disliked by member of the jury and I haven’t proven myself to be a major comp threat, I am now seen as “in the middle” which is EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED. Did I get there in the way I meant to? No. But that doesn’t matter. I mean I sort of did. I said early on that I wanted to piss a couple people off so that people would see I wouldn’t sweep a jury (and hopefully I have the opportunity to make an impressive enough move that I can convince a couple jurors to come my way. All of that aside I am honestly just happy that I am still here. In an All Star season of TS. After only playing in one main, flopping a bunch of side seasons, and now I’m in the f8 of Generations. And I’m not floating. I’m ALIVE.<3 B

Ding dong the witch is dead

Challenges are just not my thing. I just got one wrong to look like i am not a total flop. Why cant it be like ariana grande trivia or finish the lyric or something ugh :(

Am i jeremy one if the most loyal people to play gonna flip on my allaince and try to make a mive this week? Yess i am. GO BIG OR GO HOME!! If i wanna win i hav to start playing my own game and not mj, jules, or shareef game. Its a me game not a lets all work together and make final five cuz i know if that happens i am on thw bottom and shareef, mj or jules will win and i can not have that

If i can get one more to flip and pull in brian monty and jakey then i will be solid. I realky want austin to flip with me . I like him alot and if it works we can blame shareef because he is easy to blame. Oh god jesus virgin mary let this work

I was voted biggest goat last season well who is the goat now bahhhhh

ITS ALL GOING TO PLAN. SHAREEF IS ON BOARD, THE THREE ARE ON BOARD AND WE ARE GONNA MAKE MJ FEEL SO SAFE SO NO IDOL BUISNESS WILL BE USED. THIS MAY WORK OMG I FREAKIG CONIC

so, i used to have a decent social game! i was voted friendliest in ireland touchy subjects (tbt) but i think that old age has made me crankier and less tolerant of bullshit. so my social game has dropped real bad. so when i hear that jakey has been talking shit, i want to fight.

[6:52:27 PM] jakey: Jules's response after made me pissed like girl we knew our votes didn't matter no need to be condescending towards the minority [6:53:43 PM] AuSLAY: she was condescending? [6:54:32 PM] jakey: on more than one occasion (: [6:54:43 PM] AuSLAY: how so? [6:55:15 PM] jakey: lets just say she makes it known that if you are in the minority and she is in the majority then you are below her

so of course, i go pick a fight with him. warning: these are some long receipts.

[6/21/16, 10:38:57 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: so, about this game... good luck in the challenge but also id rather win, lets be real those votes got me #nervous [6/21/16, 10:39:48 PM] jakey: yeah i think everyone wants to win at this point. we knew you wouldn't go so that's why we didn't vote mj. might as well have some shock factor [6/21/16, 10:40:19 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: well, it was def a surprise! [6/21/16, 10:42:13 PM] jakey: ahhaha then it worked! [6/21/16, 10:42:31 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: seriously, though. what is your plan from here? [6/21/16, 10:44:02 PM] jakey: clearly going to people isn't helping so just waiting for people to come to me [6/21/16, 10:45:15 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: i mean... no offense, but i kinda feel like youre going about things the wrong way [6/21/16, 10:45:33 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: and i really do mean that in the nicest way- i have no beef w you [6/21/16, 10:52:26 PM] jakey: okay jules lol [6/21/16, 10:52:37 PM] jakey: I'm already in a shitty position so i don't see the point in trying to make me feel more like shit [6/21/16, 10:52:53 PM] jakey: if were being honest and i mean this in the nicest way - you suck at jury managament [6/21/16, 10:53:04 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: dude,thats not what im trying to say. im sorry if it sounded that way- i worded that wrong [6/21/16, 10:53:23 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: im just saying that we tried to work with you multiple times. [6/21/16, 10:53:54 PM] jakey: okay i don't think getting 6th would be any better [6/21/16, 10:54:36 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: it wsant necessarily going to be 6th. [6/21/16, 10:54:54 PM] jakey: 7th? [6/21/16, 10:55:00 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: i meant it when i said that i knew going to the end with mj was dumb [6/21/16, 10:55:07 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: i was trying to keep my options open [6/21/16, 10:55:13 PM] jakey: they still are open [6/21/16, 10:55:34 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: im aware of that [6/21/16, 10:56:41 PM] jakey: what if Shareef flipped back to vote out MJ [6/21/16, 10:56:48 PM] jakey: would you go with? [6/21/16, 10:57:00 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: do you actually think that he would? [6/21/16, 10:57:06 PM] jakey: don't know [6/21/16, 10:57:20 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: in that scenario, i would be flipping to the bottom of an alliance. [6/21/16, 10:57:26 PM] jakey: if youre scared of flipping on too many people talk to Austin Shareef and Jeremy about it [6/21/16, 10:57:26 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: if you could chnge that, id consider it [6/21/16, 10:58:08 PM] jakey: because if yall go alliance strong to the end mj is going to win those last 2 or 3 immunities [6/21/16, 10:58:21 PM] jakey: and walahhhh mj is the new jaemin [6/21/16, 10:58:24 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: youre really discounting my challenge ability [6/21/16, 10:58:35 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: which i reqalize hasnt been great lately... [6/21/16, 10:58:38 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: but still [6/21/16, 10:58:53 PM] jakey: just going off past experiences [6/21/16, 10:59:17 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: going off past experiences, ive won my fair share of challenges, too. [6/21/16, 10:59:33 PM] jakey: I'm aware [6/21/16, 10:59:52 PM] jakey: if youre that confident that you can beat him AND get the votes to get him out then by all means be the loyal player you want to be [6/21/16, 10:59:58 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: dude [6/21/16, 11:00:08 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: i just said that id consider voting him out [6/21/16, 11:00:27 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: the scenario you offered up just didnt seem like a good idea [6/21/16, 11:00:49 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: like i said- im open to options, but that particular one doesnt seem smart at the moment [6/21/16, 11:03:36 PM] jakey: okay [6/21/16, 11:03:46 PM] jakey: so the only thing i can offer is voting out either brian or monty [6/21/16, 11:03:57 PM] jakey: letting me fight another round [6/21/16, 11:04:10 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: im open to that [6/21/16, 11:05:34 PM] jakey: okkkk [6/21/16, 11:05:57 PM] jakey: i can be a number for you down the line after that [6/21/16, 11:06:13 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: but would you really? bc youve told me that before and it didnt help [6/21/16, 11:06:27 PM] jakey: when did i tell you that [6/21/16, 11:07:23 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: when we were aligned, for one. also sort of at the trevor vote (although i realize that we lied to you too so i totally understand any bitterness there) youve said youd be with us/me before and then you werent [6/21/16, 11:09:28 PM] jakey: i didn't go against you [6/21/16, 11:09:31 PM] jakey: i went against phil [6/21/16, 11:09:34 PM] jakey: who wasn't even in our alliance [6/21/16, 11:10:33 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: you went against original ruhau. which in turn fuqed us over at merge [6/21/16, 11:10:47 PM] jakey: clearly not? [6/21/16, 11:10:59 PM] jakey: and when i merged yall would not talk to me and never included me on anything [6/21/16, 11:11:07 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: i mean, we pulled it together but we all would have been in a much better position [6/21/16, 11:11:11 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: and i talked to you! [6/21/16, 11:11:32 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: you werent included in alliances because you flipped on our alliance [6/21/16, 11:11:36 PM] jakey: all phil talked about was flipping on yall so would you rly? [6/21/16, 11:12:00 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: all i know is that phil DIDNT flip on us [6/21/16, 11:12:02 PM] jakey: okay if you feel like i flipped then [6/21/16, 11:12:07 PM] jakey: i was 100% correct [6/21/16, 11:12:11 PM] jakey: about phil being above me [6/21/16, 11:12:13 PM] jakey: in that alliance [6/21/16, 11:12:20 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: whut [6/21/16, 11:12:23 PM] jakey: and I'm not sorry for that [6/21/16, 11:12:31 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: im not following [6/21/16, 11:12:37 PM] jakey: lol [6/21/16, 11:12:40 PM] jakey: clearly youre playing for mj to win [6/21/16, 11:12:46 PM] jakey: so we're going down different paths [6/21/16, 11:12:48 PM] jakey: I'm over this game so [6/21/16, 11:12:49 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: jakey [6/21/16, 11:12:52 PM] jakey: theres no point in talking to me anymore [6/21/16, 11:13:00 PM] jakey: let me watch my show and fight in immunity [6/21/16, 11:13:32 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: i am playing for me to win. ive told you before that i will do what i have to for me to win. we dont have to talk anymore, but dont belittle my game just because youre threatened by mj. i know what im doing. [6/21/16, 11:13:37 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: enjoy the show. [6/21/16, 11:14:01 PM] jakey: youre playing the exact same way you were in Olympics? [6/21/16, 11:14:05 PM] jakey: and look where that got you [6/21/16, 11:14:19 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: think what you want, friendo [6/21/16, 11:14:26 PM] jakey: even if it's not [6/21/16, 11:14:30 PM] jakey: perception and jury management [6/21/16, 11:14:34 PM] jakey: is VERY important in winning [6/21/16, 11:14:50 PM] jakey: so saying words to people isn't going to help when you did nothing to back it up [6/21/16, 11:15:13 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: youre not backing it up either, honey [6/21/16, 11:15:31 PM] jakey: backing what up? [6/21/16, 11:16:42 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: your talk. you flipped your way from one alliance with potential to an alliance where youll always be the bottom. you say you want to make moves, but you also say that youre just going to wait for people to talk to you. you arent staying loyal to anyone, and while that can work, you have to have some allies in the long run.

i could have been that, but you burned that bridge. [6/21/16, 11:17:14 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: for no reason, i might add [6/21/16, 11:18:45 PM] jakey: How am I on the bottom of this alliance? there's fucking 3 of us. and i was on the bottom of your alliance so how is it a dumb decision?? MJ even admitted to me it was smart so don't fucking sit there and tell me that my moves were dumb and i should have just sided with yall from the start. i know you think I'm stupid and I'm just making all the wrong game moves but i promise, sweetie, i'll get the last laugh whether it's in this game or on the jury so bye. [6/21/16, 11:19:41 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: i never called you stupid. i dont think youre stupid [6/21/16, 11:23:57 PM] jakey: apparently you think that the way I'm playing this game is stupid since i should have just voted brian/Andrew/monty out and sat in my 10th place spot [6/21/16, 11:24:33 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: we're just talking in circles now [6/21/16, 11:24:49 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: im sorry if ive offended your intelligence. i think youre very smart. [6/21/16, 11:25:40 PM] jakey: i think you are too and whoever is sitting at the end will be the smartER one i guess. or it'll be neither of us and we'll both be dumbasses for not working together [6/21/16, 11:25:58 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: exactly

im jeremy coming to me/monty/brian/shareef about wanting to flip to take out MJ and him thinking its this big move of his and kdsfjlkdsfkl. like shareef and i have been planning this ever since the age of dawn and it's just funny.

god i love jeremy he's so pure and naive. it's kinda... good? that he wants to flip... i guess...........s.s..s....... personally i want old school to go out one by one HAHAHAH so i can be the last one standing

mj > jules > austin > brian > shareef > (monty if f2) is my preferred boot order but we'll see how everything goesss i lowkey think austin has an idol so he needs to get blindsided ... soon.

The plan is to split the votes, 4 on mj, 2 on jules, and then whoever mj and jules vote for! I think its a smart plan incase mj has that idol(which i dont think he has

alright ill write a confessional before i have this horrible graduation rehearsal. basically we got everyone on board for the MJ vote besides jules lol........ funny........ ironic........ seems like i was right huh jules

anyway we're splitting the vote just in case and obviously i volunteer to vote jules because that's fucking hilarious and i wanna vote for her 3 times in a row. also i kinda wanted to vote for MJ cause i would have a hilarious voting confessional i would have done: [6/22/2016 5:28:54 PM] mj ultra: like I know mostly everybody will want me out at some point but like... the people I'm with ATM haven't done anything to cause distrust [6/22/2016 5:29:11 PM] jakey: idk about that [6/22/2016 5:29:37 PM] jakey: I think you'll really regret it

but anyway yeah i have f2's with monty shareef and brian at this point rip. i can only stay loyal to one so i better pick who i wanna go to the end with fast before i get myself confused and vote out the wrong person.

MJ is gonna go.

Or not.

I don't know.

It's too good to be true that suddenly Austin AND Shareef AND Jeremy are looking to make this move. And I need to find the right numbers within the 6.

I feel like if I end up in the 3 with Jakey and Monty I get seen as the guy who rode them in OR the guy who was dumb enough to be the face of an alliance.

If I end up at the end with Austin he has a good argument for playing under the radar while maintaining good social relationships to the point where people are always hesitant to target him.

If I end up at the end with Shareef he's the one who spearheaded the move that took him from the middle/bottom of an alliance to the tippity top AND he's a next level sweet talker who could verbalize himself into a win against anyone.

If I end up at the end with Jeremy I think I beat him, but only because nobody else here thinks what he does which is that flipping on MJ is HIS move. Shareef and Austin had been working much harder and much more effectively at making sure they had the connections to make this move, Jeremy relied solely on what he thinks is desperation on the parts of Monty, Jakey and I.

Jules? I just have no idea, but I know people look at her as MJ's puppet which may or may not be a plus for her given who is on the first half of the jury. (Phil, Trevor, and MJ).

Anyway I'm pretty sure that either this plan is going to go the way it seems and MJ will go or its all a ruse and I'll be going. Again, at least it won't be a total blindside because I simply wouldnt be all that surprised if that was the case.

so word just got out that austin and jeremy were flipping to vote me out this round...

so ive had to do some last minute scrambling....i feel sick right now.

i called jeremy and told him that i heard my name come up and that he and austin were voting for me, and he said he voted for brian and that he was sticking with the group.. some more BS...i asked him to give me his word that at the very least, he will vote for brian with me jules and shareef to force a tie...and he agreed to that...

i dont know how well he can lie, i dont see the point of him lying, especially if he's voting me out..

austin, i just sent a ton of messages to, explaining why this is a relatively Bad Move for him.... i dont see the point in him flipping either like..... i just think its the wrong move for them to vote me out this round because literally NOBODY ELSE is close to beating Jakey at immunity, and thats exactly why he wants me out like...theyre just gonna be handing JAKE the easy win...for no reason... idk....

ive reached out to both of them...and if they still feel the need to boot me this round...then they deserve to lose, so..

and i understand that theres still a possibility that say, shareef, could be lying and HE could be the one low key orchestrating this flip....so idk...................its all too much and too last minute for me and im just so upset because ive done nothing to show that im anything LESS than loyal to the people in my group and im even more mad because i wanted jakey out at the first merge vote but nobody listened to me and now....hes the main reason why i could get voted out tonight. it's all so frustrating. i hate playing with stupid players that do dumb shit for literally no reason.

im gonna keep scrambling for the next half hour or so to lock down what i can... but its really not looking good for me...

After talking to mj i feel so heartbroken. I love him i really do and this sucks!! It was all my plan and yet i am habibg doubts. I know there is no turning back but i just feel like a piece of shit person know.

I cant go to the tribal. This is all my plan and it had to be done but i feel sick and i just cant.

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 9: “I’m Just Here So I Don’t Get Fined”-Jules

"Im still here bitches and i know everything"- A

I will have more to say once I finish this episode of South Pacific so for now I will leave you with

WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK WAS THAT GODT

i guess that went.......as planned

🖕🏻 @ shareef

This tribal was awful. Shareef flipped and Trevor changed his vote at the last second and made it so Trevor went home instead of Jeremy. Shareef had this great explanation for me apparently, but he "had to help his brother real quick". I figure he's talking to Brian because I've felt on the bottom of new schoolers for a while and lo and behold, Brian lets me know they're on call. WHy can't Shareef call both of us at the same time? Obviously he prefers Brian over me. You know why? He voted out Trevor for riding the middle, and I bet he knows I'm obviously doing the same thing. ALTHOUGH FUCKING SHAREEF IS THE BIGGEST MIDDLE-RIDER THERE EVER WAS FLIPPING LIKE THAT.

Shareef finally gets back to me and says he wants to talk to me tomorrow which is completely uncalled for when he's already spoken with Brian. I have no idea what I'm gonna do because I didn't want to go off at them and make them think I had any chance of flipping against them but like I couldn't help it because this has been a long time coming and tonight just exacerbated it. This whole alliance was his idea to begin with too like I hate him so much he's freaking crazy.

I'm just not in as good of a position as I thought because no one actually gives me any useful information/talks to me especially except Monty so whatever I'll just hope I didn't completely fuck things up tonight although OBVIOUSLY I should look like less of a competition threat/flipper than SHAREEF so we'll see.

sldfsdlkfsldkjfjsdlkfjklsdljkfsldkflkjlkdsfa;asd;fsad;dfskksldf;dsafsadlf;asdfjafjweoijoiee sdnfsdjfsdfksadjlkfasdfsdjfjlsdkfljdskfjkldsfsjlkdkdslfkldfkldsfjsdjdsfjkldsjflksdjlsdklfsdklfdsklf

I don’t know how Shareef voted with them and still convinced me he’s on my side, but he did.

He told me about Liana having an alliance with Trevor and Monty, which is REALLY alarming. Like I have been 100% straight up with Liana and she was hiding that shit? Nuh uh honey.

I feel really good about being with Shareef still and we can find numbers ourselves. I trust Monty and Jake still as well.

I think I need to vote out Liana asap, because people see us a super tight pair and I need to make it clear that we are not. I know that sounds insane but I think people will see me as less of a threat if she is gone. Like I think people see me as this villain type with a loyal follower and that’s jus not what I want. Like if we can get out either Austin or Jules next I would happily turn on her with Shareef and Jakey. I say Austin or Jules basically assuming that MJ will win immunity. If he doesn’t I just can’t help but feel like it’s in everyones best interest to get him out. And anyone who is in a swing position (Austin or Shareef) will vote with us. I’m going to work on Jakey a bit more tonight, I might tell him about Liana, Monty, and Trevor. Though I may wait for the morning idk.

I was honestly shocked at how candid Shareef was with me about he feels about everything that has happened so far. But I take it as evidence that he GENUINELY wants to work with me and wants to be way more moving forward. I never really took in how people would be unwilling to share things with me because of the assumption that I would tell Liana (which was honestly accurate up until this point) so I’m going to need to distance myself from her.

I mean I’m honestly torn about Liana though. Shareef could just be strong arming me not making him my number one by voting her out and forcing me to rely upon him. and I’m just about positive that people would accuse her of riding my coattails (based solely on the game so far) at the end. Do I think she has? Not at all. But I think it’s the impression people have.

So hopefully I do much better with this live comp (lol okay) and can focus on finding the numbers and not on the fact that I am positive that I am the next target for the other side.

omg me and Monty are on call while I wait for Brian to get back to me after "a bit". (BTW, he never got back to me and I had to message him a couple of hours later for him to realize). Anyway Monty and I realized something hilarious...we made almost the exact same voting confessional about "too little too late". Obviously MonTEAna is meant to last. <3

im calling this confessional: Ode to Jules

i cant fuckin stand the way jules talks to me and the way she goes about game talk. when she approaches you she makes you know that you are below her and that you will never be as great as the all mighty jules!! jules wants information? she demands it and will give you nothing in return. "is phil going or WHAT?" "are you voting with us or NOT"

like today i approached her like actually ill copy what i said.. i said "i don't wanna make you do anything cause you'll just do whatever but if you wanna vote with us we'll probably vote for MJ unless you have another plan in that case you have my vote and probably liana monty and brian's"

and she responds with [1:10:52 AM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: i mean... i dont have another plan. [1:11:07 AM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: youre welcome to vote with us, though

like is that not the most condescending thing you could say to someone in the minority??? i mean im not really in the minority and her ass's time will come and i'll have the last laugh but damn she gets on my nerves.

jules when you're reading this just know i really do like you but i don't like you as a game player noah fence. it's clear she's just playing for MJ to win at this point so it's just really boring with her whole "obviously MJ will have to go at some point" shit is so dumb. like girl you do know he will go on an immunity run before you even think about targeting him. she'll wait for the next vote when shareef and austin turn on her to get out MJ and be like oh... i would have totally done that!! like no u wouldnt have because you're playing the game for MJ and not yourself.

also shareef told me she wanted to vote out liana just to be the only girl left which is........ anyways... like maybe you should actually think about the game and have a strategy to voting people out since it is you know.... survivor? not who can be the last female standing??

anyway i think i ranted about jules enough for today. this is the meanest confessional i've done all season but let's be real it could have been like my redemption island confessionals so this isnt that bad.

oh and we were going to vote for MJ but just because im petty i'm getting them to put their votes on jules :~)

So I spent the better part of this afternoon and evening trying to convince Shareef to vote with us (Me, Jakey, Liana, and Monty). He wants Liana gone BADLY. Whether its really because he doesn’t trust her or because he just wants to cripple me and have me lose a jury vote, I’m not sure yet. But I essentially assured him that if he voted with us to get out either MJ or Jules, we would vote out Liana next. Which I am honestly fine to do since I 1. found out she’s playing closer to the chest than I thought since she had that thing with Trevor and Monty and 2. Her being here is preventing people from being willing to bring things to me since we’re seen as a strong twosome. I’m seen as the bigger threat between us two, so hopefully her going would have a positive effect on people’s perception of how threatening I am.

I’m pretty frustrated with Austin at the moment. He basically spelled out his position to me last night and I am just so bewildered that he thinks MJ or Jules will take him over Jeremy who is basically just a second vote MJ gets to keep around. I’m also hoping people like MJ or Jules see that I am actually a pretty good person to have beside you at the end at this point since Phil can’t stand me and Trevor doesn’t know me at all. If I’m beside MJ at the end, he wins either 6-3 or or 5-2/3- with maybe a 1 for whoever is next to us. We’re still early in this merge and I just wish I could feel a bit better about my position. But Jakey and I are putting in WORK to try and make sure at least the two of us make it one more round. He’s safe, god love him, so now I HAVE to make sure that I am safe. I’m limping through the woods, lost and bleeding and I can hear the wolves closing in.

A very shook B

I just think this convo is worth seeing again after whoever wins wins:

[2016-06-21, 3:08:51 AM] jakey: [3:02:26 AM] AuSLAY: Ok here's an idea that I think I could work for both of us [3:08:46 AM] jakey: This suspense... [2016-06-21, 3:09:01 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): lmffaooooo [2016-06-21, 3:15:40 AM] jakey: [3:10:46 AM] AuSLAY: types for five minures and doesn't press send [3:10:59 AM] AuSLAY: (think) [3:11:45 AM] jakey: (yoga) [3:13:05 AM] AuSLAY: ok [3:13:07 AM] AuSLAY: so [2016-06-21, 3:20:42 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): asdfjlkhagsf [2016-06-21, 3:20:44 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): here we go [2016-06-21, 3:21:07 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): inb4

[3:13:07 AM] AuSLAY: So first we vote out Brian [2016-06-21, 3:21:19 AM] jakey: OMFg [2016-06-21, 3:23:12 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): keep me updated on whats happenin [2016-06-21, 3:23:46 AM] jakey: so he wants to go for liana first [2016-06-21, 3:23:53 AM] jakey: and then he said he will get out MJ [2016-06-21, 3:23:59 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): I'm [2016-06-21, 3:24:02 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): ugh [2016-06-21, 3:24:07 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): hmm [2016-06-21, 3:24:16 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): like how wild would it be if it ended up [2016-06-21, 3:24:17 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): you [2016-06-21, 3:24:17 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): me [2016-06-21, 3:24:19 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): austin [2016-06-21, 3:24:20 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): shareef [2016-06-21, 3:24:21 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): and monty [2016-06-21, 3:24:46 AM] jakey: a concept.. [2016-06-21, 3:24:52 AM] jakey: then me u and monty would have 3-2 [2016-06-21, 3:24:57 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): exactly [2016-06-21, 3:25:02 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): which is exactly what I want [2016-06-21, 3:25:13 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): its BEEN you an dMonty [2016-06-21, 3:25:24 AM] jakey: same everyone else pisses me off [2016-06-21, 3:25:33 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): (it was you and andrew until andrew went) but u know [2016-06-21, 3:25:56 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): yeah like [2016-06-21, 3:25:59 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): bye @mj [2016-06-21, 3:26:03 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): bye @jules [2016-06-21, 3:26:05 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): bye @austin [2016-06-21, 3:26:10 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): bye @jeremy [2016-06-21, 3:26:16 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): 50% bye @shareef [2016-06-21, 3:26:17 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): like [2016-06-21, 3:26:31 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): I’m Brakey all the way [2016-06-21, 3:27:44 AM] jakey: KLLKDD [2016-06-21, 3:27:45 AM] jakey: same [2016-06-21, 3:27:53 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): <3 [2016-06-21, 3:27:58 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): Whats austin saying now? [2016-06-21, 3:28:05 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): Like are you trying to sell the opposite order? [2016-06-21, 3:28:12 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): The problem we have much less of a leg to stand on [2016-06-21, 3:28:25 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): But if we vote out Liana we lose both legs potentially [2016-06-21, 3:28:51 AM] jakey: i mean i just accepted it [2016-06-21, 3:28:54 AM] jakey: i didn't wanna piss him off [2016-06-21, 3:28:57 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): ok [2016-06-21, 3:29:03 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): did he go into any more detail? [2016-06-21, 3:29:08 AM] jakey: nope [2016-06-21, 3:29:10 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): okay [2016-06-21, 3:29:18 AM] Brian (Kauai Host): yeah true @ us never having a real chance to flip him rn [2016-06-21, 3:29:36 AM] jakey: I'm trevor voting himself out

THE PLAN IT TAKE OUT LILIANA HOW ICONIC. NOT ONLY DID SHE TRY TO TAKE OUT ICONIC JEREMYSUS SHE IS JUST A LIAR AND BAD AT THIS GAME SHE GOTTA GO

So, Trevor got voted out https://vine.co/v/ibIzYnPjvVp but it turns out he was doing some shady shit, like telling everything Liana and I told him to Shareef. SOOO! Shareef flipped on him, and maybe our whole alliance? Idk, what he's thinking, but I want him gone not this round, because hopefully that will be MJ, but next round so that we can finish off the winners right now. Also, Jeremy and MJ are impossible to talk to. Like I've tried, but they either end it with one word answers or no word answers. Like, great relationship building. It's not like you want me on the jury and voting for you or anything. Nope, that's not in your plan. So, I'm just kinda salty towards everyone except Liana and Jakey rn, and I guess to a lesser extend Brian. Idk, I just don't really like people. I'm also tired. Idk what that has to do with anything, but here I am. OH! Jakey won immunity and retirement, which I think puts him ahead of me in draft points :/ that's awkward. I wanted to be the first to 30 points. But at least the Old Schoolers didn't win AGAIN...

I know, I shouldn't drive and confess, but I can't help it. I live dangerously.

Do i flip or not flip. Brian is talking to me and he is making alot of sense. Basically who leaves tonight could be up to me or he could be lying and they are just gonna vote me again i dont know but tonight vote should be interesting

I recorded a confessional but it won't upload, so I'm just here so I don't get fined. Anyway, so pumped to (hopefully) be the only girl! You'll get a real confessional tomorrow.

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 8: “Boys Line Up! I’m Dateable Now” - Monty (Part 2)

So apparently the other side wants me out no me fucking gusta. Stupid other side wanting to vote the cutest cast member off. Jealousy is a fucking ugly ass trait to possess. Gotta get my swuad to take out one of these uglies cuz they gotta go

Update: because austin is Not Very Smart, the jakey blindside wont be happening...and i can just,,,tell YOU jakey not leaving this round will literally kill my game...but im not gonna make my alliance do anything.

BUT WITH THAT SAID, AS SOON AS I CAN VOTE OUT AUSTIN, I WILL.

I'm using the vote identifier on Shareef and we'll figure things out from there...

This may be my final words so if it is: i hate you all

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 8: “Boys Line Up! I’m Dateable Now”- Monty (Part 1)

holy SHIT I was so livid when I saw that challenge post.

Anyway MERGE TIME MOTHA FUCKAS now all I have to do is survive one vote and I think I’ll be okay.

Okay well, here we are day 1 of the merge. I've spoken to Shareef and Jakey and it feels like we are on the same page, but nobody seems to want to pull the trigger and make the alliance chat which is super frustrating. We worked so hard to make sure the numbers would be at least equal and it feels like I'm the only one putting any work in right now, hopefully that changes by the end of today.

BOYS! LINE UP! I'M DATEABLE NOW!

god i fucking hate austin. like why do you shit talk me to everyone??? shareef just told me that austin said to him that "jake has no shot at winning the game after what he did"

are you actually fucking kidding me? he even fucking acknowledged the fact that i was on the bottom of the old school alliance and by bettering my position in the game and getting rid of old school's numbers for the merge and finding new allies who have a sense of loyalty to me was BAD for my game... right... i just cant fucking stand old school and their pompous rude ass fucking attitudes like really? do you really think that fucking highly of yourselves that you can't get it through your fucking skulls that you suck at this game. you didn't put in any fucking effort to make me feel any type of inclusiveness to your alliance and now yall are throwing a fucking pity party after i jump ship and saying that i have no shot of winning now.

please get the fuck over yourselves. god im livid. right now i just want to systematically vote them out.

like tbh i was thinking about going with old school for this first vote and voting out liana or something but now? one of them is going first. i'll make damn sure of that.

MERGE BABY TIME TO FUCK SHIT UP!! GONNA BE LIT.(sorry i dont have a good confessional i am at my grad party and also rip at this challenge, i wanna die.)

Alright. Where should we begin. I made merge, that's a start. It's not like I've been waiting over a year for this 🙃. No, so that's super exciting. My three main goals for this game were to improve my placement, make merge, and prove myself as a competent player, and I think I've done those things. Now I just want to play as well as I can for as long as I can. As of now, I'm in a majority alliance with Liana jakey Brian shareef and Trevor? I think he's in there. (I'm typing this on mobile skype so I can't check for sure) But he's in the extended alliance. Then on top of that I have two final threes, one with Liana and Trevor and one with Liana and shareef. THEN I have two final twos, one with jakey and one with (wait for it...) Liana!! So really, nothing has changed since premerge except the whole alliance came together, and miraculously we have numbers in theory, provided everyone stays loyal. So I've been talking to Austin from the old school alliance, and he is my favorite. I need to talk to the others, but I don't really have anything to talk about with them. MJ has made it very obvious who his friends are and that I'm not one of them. Jules and Jeremy just kinda follow along with him. Surprise surprise MJ won immunity 🙃. Bigger surprise, I didn't flop! Shareef and Brian want to vote Jules, but I think she's too obvious of a vote and if there's an idol, she'll get it. So I don't like that. I want Austin or Jeremy because I think they're less likely to have an idol, but yk.... Ugh this is great :/

Well MJ won immunity, so I'm actually going to push to see that Jeremy be voted out. We'll see how that goes tomorrow.

Also I've just REALLY taken in how in the middle of my main 5 person alliance I am. I'm new school with Liana and Shareef, and NuRuhau with Monty and Jakey, which is just perfect. Is this my ideal f5? No. But for now they are some excellent numbers. Once it gets down to us 5 and Austin and Trevor, I'm hoping I can take Liana, Jakey, Monty, and Austin with me to take out Shareef and Trevor. Shareef because he's a next level threat and I still think he's being dishonest about his connections with the NuMapu people. And Trevor simply because I know nothing about him and therefor do not trust him. Once I'm at that five I'm certain I could get to the end with Jakey and Liana, or at the very least Liana.

Also idk why other people aren't writing more confessions, writing my thoughts down is so so so helpful to me so I'm gonna just keep spewing them out.

woohoo so merge finally happened! The alliance's plan of getting rid of their extra people on their tribe so we'd have the numbers come merge went basically flawless (save for Andrew going home) but honestly, better Andrew than me, right? I'll miss him though. ;-;

I'm closest with Trevor and Monty right now and I think Brian and Shareef know it, but I'm trying my best to stay in the middle and play both sides. Brian and Shareef always end calls with me extra early so I take that as a bad sign. We were talking about who we wanted to vote off if MJ wins immunity (because honestly who didn't know that was gonna happen) and they want Jules, but I know Monty wants Austin. I would like to keep Austin because I like him way better than Brian/Shareef but, alas it's the best thing to do right now. It sucks that MJ is going to the retirement home but I'm just gonna hope that there's nothing much good left (although I bet it has been restocked with delightful special merge items). Ugh that reminds me of how I'm still bitter that Brian didn't wanna send me to the retirement home earlier. I should've called him out on call in front of Shareef like "yeah it's a shame I couldn't go since Phil didn't want me to Brian" or something to see how they reacted.

Oooo something really great that happened that I don't know if I mentioned earlier is that Monty lied for me on a call with Trevor which was absolutely amazing. <3 Trevor asked how we threw battleship and how our board got sent to the other side, and Monty said that Shareef did it (even though I was the one) and put even more suspicion on Shareef. HA!

Jakey just messaged me (cricket noise) yeah idk him either?? But i think i am stivking with shareef, mj, aus10, and jewlz(cuz she is a gangsta), and we are gonna take out all the ugliez. Idk who yet, personally i want brian out, but its convincing the rest to fo it ugh this is so hard and messy. Wish me luck america

Well I guess I trust Trevor now? idk he’s a good number but I just haven’t really spoken to him at all so I’m still wary of what’s going to happen there. I still feel very solid however with my core 5, and the two 3 person groups I am in within that 5. So the plan is currently to vote for Jeremy.

We are unsure as to what to tell Austin as he has been working hard to talk to all of us, we’re trying to decide if being truthful with him as a group is the right call, because if he brings it back to MJ we don’t know if MJ would assume we are lying or not. Kind of a confusing mess with regards to the whole “they don’t know we know they know we know” thing

ITS A MESS OKAY.

All we need is for this ONE vote to work out and I should be good to the f5, and god knows what will happen from there.

-The B

LATE NIGHT WRITTEN CONF. // LETS DO THIS

so im talking with jakey and.... he wanted to clear the air so he sent this message:

[12:34:34 AM] jakey: ok well this is why i wanted to talk to you I'm sorry if the timing is weird i guess you just happened to win immunity so it looks sus but i wasn't planning on voting you out if you lost. but i thought i should explain myself since jules was messaging me all confused and stuff so here goes nothing

but basically going into a merge i knew you had a lot of connections in the cast. its not your fault or anything its just how the cast was made and with the swap i saw an opportunity to weaken your potential allies who i felt you might have been more inclined to work with over me. i think the reason yall got so mad at me proves i made the right decision with that bc it did fuck up your games a bit. i really wanted to work with YOU just not the millions of connections you already had  but like after i did flipped on the people who just assumed i would be in an alliance with them, i think you and jules felt betrayed by me which was not my intention. phil was telling me how i would have been next if we lost immunity in ruhau which i obviously believe and you all were worried about me and my relationship with Katie. and that alliance yall made on day 1 or 2 with Katie and me and then as soon we lose yall say were voting Katie like ??? that rose a big red flag for me that i was not on top of any totem pole yall had. anyway this is so messy I'm so tired but basically don't think I'm trying to play both sides by sending this to you i just felt like i owed you an explanation for everything. with the stuff phil and Katie told me on ruhau and your relationships with Nathan and phil, it was the choice i decided to make to make new allies since i didn't feel appreciated or valuable where i was on old school.

i genuinely like you as a person and i might have screwed up your game a little bit by getting out your potential allies but it wasn't meant to betray you or anything. it just was a move i needed to make and i hope you understand that. moving forward in the game, i hope you accept my apology and not hate my guts or anything. again this is probably the messiest shit i have ever wrote I'm so sorry for doing this to you

I hate this game and like basically..... I'm not expecting to win or anything but i think staying in the position i was in and voting with Nathan/josh/phil would just put me in an even worse position at the merge. <<

so let's dissect this, shall we?

"i wasn't planning on voting you out if you lost" >> lies...

"but basically going into a merge i knew you had a lot of connections in the cast" HUH? you mean my connections to...all the people that want me out because me breathing makes me too big of a threat?

"with the swap i saw an opportunity to weaken your potential allies" ..he does realize that this is him saying, "i didn't make moves against you, I made moves against your allies"...which to me ultimately translates to..."i made moves against you" ... if ur not with me ur against me b*tch!

"i think the reason yall got so mad at me proves i made the right decision with that bc it did fuck up your games a bit." HUH??????????? we're mad at you bc you fucked up EVERYONE'S GAME, INCLUDING YOURSELF

"phil was telling me how i would have been next if we lost immunity in ruhau which i obviously believe" JKSGHFJGSDJFHKJSDF goddd I remember Phil saying he told him that to secure THEIR relationship.........phil played himself huh?

"it was the choice i decided to make to make new allies since i didn't feel appreciated or valuable where i was on old school." sorry I didn't s*ck your d*ck to make you feel like you were in a good position:(

"I'm not expecting to win or anything" lmfao I wonder why

---------------------

anyways, then i give jake this Heartfelt Plea abt how i didnt feel betrayed by him, i was just shocked and confused as to way he'd play the flip flop game when hes PLAYED IN A SEASON WHERE SOMEBODY LOST BC THEY WERE BEING A FLIP FLOP... and i continue to express to him that i dont have any option, that i want to work with him, and that bc its basically set in stone that i wone make it to the end, that i want to help him play a complex game so he has a shot at winning. i go on to lay out why he should work with old school rather than the other ppl....and the plea was, true, for the most part, except ALTHOUGH i do believe there's no way i can make it to the end, i still fully intend on doing whatever i have to do to get myself one round further....and one round further,,,,and one round further, until its too late for anyone to take me out and im at FTC like "it's been a pleasure playing with SUCH fierce competitors this season."

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 7: “Idol Roulette” -  Trevor (Part 2)

Phil's Funeral Deleted Scene: Jakey: Oh, Jakey. You've been so good to me here. Telling me about the vote split? Thanks! Telling Josh you wanted to vote for Brian? Awesome! Too bad we won't be able to be a final two like you wanted. When not even your fellow gremlin can trust you, who will? Your incapability of recognizing when is a good time to flip and when isn't is pretty apparent. Like, seriously. If you had voted with us THEN voted out Nathan, we wouldn't be in this mess. Learn from the best. My advice to you--and this is genuine--getting people to work with you really isn't that difficult. Just, you know, be a little more convincing. It takes more than just a "hi" and "okay I'll vote with you" to get people on your side. I hope you have an enjoyable time for your remaining 3 days in the game.

...The question is, do I use all the dirt I have on Jake to flip a vote? Or do I trust that he's telling me the truth about wanting Brian out? Tough to say at this point...I can't do both. People talk.

ok, so brian is being annoying and ugh. so like, he voted for jakey last tribal which is yike. then he went through and deleted our answers for the challenge which is also yike. so, like im kinda pissed at that. and phil and i spen like an hour on call talking. he even proposed taking me out for a drink but then remembered I was 17 :P So, here I am weighing my options about who to vote, brian or phil https://vine.co/v/iLj5FlveiwL

Ok, so I wrote that last night, and now it's almost time to vote. This is hands down the hardest vote for me to decide and cast, maybe ever. Phil is great. We've bonded a lot over the last 3ish days, and he's just amazing. But throwing away the loyalty that Jakey and Brian have been PROVING to me vote after vote for the past week is just not right. Voting them out right now would definitely hurt my game. I really hope this is jury, so that when/if I join him, we can reconnect and be friends. Ugh, I hate this so much why couldn't MJ or Jules be on our tribe instead ;-; Also, another determining factor, is Jakey doesn't want to vote Brian (??? idk why, Brian has yet to show real loyalty to him with the whole, you know, voting for him bit) and if it's a deadlock, then just me and Jakey go to rocks, and I don't want to risk that. I'd either be rocked out myself or lose Jakey who I'm also really close with.

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 7: “Idol Roulette” - Trevor (Part 1)

IM THE MOST SCALPED PERSON ALIVE RIGHT NOW.

I CANT BELIEVE THAT.

PHIL HAD AN IDOL. MONTY HAD ANOTHER IDOL. PHILS VOTE FOR ME *SAVED* ME I VOTED FOR JAKEY AND IN DOING SO VOTED OUT ANDREW

IM SHAKING RN

AND THERE ISNT EVEN A MERGE LIKE

FUCKFUCKFCUKFUCJFCDHSAFHIDQVSLFDWBLFQW

FUCKING WILD WHEW.

You know your tribe fucking hates you when they sit you out every fucking challenge:) me bot being able to play i hate. But let me be a good solider and do as i told. But at least i can come in here and vent home jules acts like she is running this tribe and how no one seems to want to talk to me like yikes i gtg

[10:26:58 PM] AuSLAY: ok I'm sorry I'm done being fussy [10:31:22 PM] AuSLAY: but this still doesn't sit well with me

[6/3/2016 9:12:08 PM] Bernel: It was lovely getting to talk to the rest of you (actually not Austin, I don't really like you but that's fine).

I really relate to Bernel right now. I'm EXTREMELY fed up with Austin's bad attitude and negative general presence. I really don't mean to sound mean right now or anything...but ...2 weeks of Austin is more than enough for me.

Actual, legitimate confessional about tonight's event's will come tomorrow. But as of right now im quite irritated, frustrated, and annoyed by austin.

[6/13/16, 9:21:28 PM] Jules Anglim-Hwang: Anyway you think there's a way to flush whatever idol Jake might have?

because i love making these

Me @ Phil's funeral https://vine.co/v/eaDHKZXYmYD Phil coming at me and Jakey for an alliance https://vine.co/v/O6IQtw5OnbX Phil saving his ass with an idol https://vine.co/v/heEMvJBbgFT Me successfully(?) playing my second idol https://vine.co/v/i3ZuHPQHL2W Brian joining in with his extra vote https://vine.co/v/OQ3UJBKI16v Jakey whipping out his Sapphire Idol https://vine.co/v/OH0QVTPKIht Andrew leaving https://vine.co/v/O2mEInUizIL That tribal as a whole: https://vine.co/v/hbt0O7HYA1g Shareef calling me out on my second idol: https://vine.co/v/i3wmMrXXrV0 Me @ the hosts #blindsiding us with no merge https://vine.co/v/OIrM9pKMqmu

not my best work :/

Alright, now for something serious.

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!! So, Phil was so extra with that funeral. Like, ok... O_o I did kinda dodge most of the roast, though, so that's good. Like, mine seemed the least terrible compared to the other three, so that's something. So, challenge thrown, and then tribal. I had my idol, just in case. Phil played the one I was expecting. I wanted to take absolutely no chances, so I played mine as well, and oh boy was it worth it. Brian played his vote doubler, for Jakey, which is good because even though Jakey and I are the Out Dogs, idk why but I don't trust him. So, Brian voted that way. Then Jakey pulls a Sapphire Idol out of his ass. I was expecting a Sapphire, but not this early in the game, whew! So then everything falls into place, and Andrew ends up being the only one to go home. I ALMOST played my idol on him, and I'm glad I didn't because I would've gone instead at that point. So then after tribal, Shareef messages me and is like "I gave you my idol, and you didn't tell me about yours?" so us and Liana went on call in the Niddles chat, which also revealed how close we are, and then basically just explained everything as it was. So that's sketchy, but when I confronted him about his weird message, he got kinda awkward, and sketch. So, like, good number for now, but I want him out O_o. Side note, Liana and I also came up with a duo name. Monteana. Mont for Monty. Tea, because we spill tea to each other and Ana for Liana, so that's Monteana.

dude like.....................

im up @ almost 5 am thinking about this game AGAIN and for the past two nights ive had a serious call with shareef and then ALL NIGHT afterwards im up thinking about literally every single thing that can wrong because of something i said to him like. i have to trust shareef because hes my best and really only option at this point but there's still this part of my mind that is like DO NOT TRUST HIM, YOU KNOW NOT TO TRUST HIM. HE IS A RAT. but i HAVE to show some amount of confidence in our relationship and i HAVE to make myself vulnerable and step out of my comfort zone in order to do well its just that.....there's so much that can go wrong....my game is on this ice at this point really and its truly TERRIFYING that literally anything i say can screw me over RIGHT BEFORE THE MERGE.

so like..it really is rough having to deal with this insane amount of paranoia because im relying on...shareef of all people and like....being up this late...stressed out...paranoid....every single night CANNOT be good for me mentally or emotionally like....I might need a therapist after this

So Monty told me kind of a lie yesterday I think, though not one that makes me think I can’t trust him, more just that he trusts Shareef more than me. Because Shareef told me that he found the Pakari idol and that was how Monty got it the first time, but before I went into the RH Monty talked me through how he got the idol and talked about playing that paper toss flash game. I’m thinking Monty just told me how he got the second idol, the one he played last night and played it off as the first one so that he wouldn’t have to expose Shareef. At this point though I am DONE throwing competitions because I feel way more exposed now that Andrew is gone. If that means Liana goes and I hit the merge in shark infested waters, so be it. I think I have pissed just the right amount of people off that I wouldn’t actually be targeted straight away. I could also be way off though and just repeat Transylvania so who knows.

Well Jakey and I went in a deleted a bunch of the work Phil had done and it's probably the most villainous thing either of us have done this whole season but to be quite frank it's the only thing we had left to do in order to combat MJ's giant alliance.

As much as I like Phil the person, Phil the game player has been a thorn in my motha fuckin SIDE okay so he's got ta go. I genuinely feel bad but I also want to win at any cost soooooo that's that. Just trying to move on.

See you on the other side of this meeeeerge!

@Hosts i am so so sorry for that mess we pulled in this last immunity.  As far as I know MJ and Jules were trying to throw and I could not stand for that.  Not with my ass on the line. So we had to start working out of a seperate doc and add it all to the real one at the last minute so that MJ and Jules couldnt send it to Phil to save him. Luckily the other tribe was leaving it all up to Phil to do the challenge. I hate this throwing bull crap.  I just want to win. Hopefully it worked.

Just when you think i am dead this is like my 10000 resurection this game. I am like on some ahs coven shit. Anyways mj, i, jules, shareef, and aus10 are gonna form a group and together we are gonna take on this merge. Icons only. I am kinda sad cuz trevor is someone i like and really wanna work with:/ . But hey daddy is back, and watch out cuz i aint messing around this time

So Monty had to play an idol and then Shareef gets all pissed because Shareef gave Monty an idol while Monty kept his secret (though technically I had it at the time so whatever!) Monty and I decide that it's best just to come clean with Shareef and so we call him together (and hosts decide they want to hear the tea too that was exciting). It went better than I thought I did but then I was, you know, calling Shareef out on all the shady stuff he's done all game so he couldn't necessarily blame us, and he freaking lied to us again and I know it!

Basically he sent Monty a weird message that talked about liana, brian, jakey, and monty all in third-person. When Monty said "I'm guessing that was to the wrong person" Shareef said "you're good". We were like, what was that??? And at first he was like what message?? We showed him the receipts and he was like "..." "..." "...oh that must've been a confessional!" Immediately I PM Monty "Confessional? *eye roll emoji* because that's obviously the biggest lie because we don't even do confessionals on Skype. So yeah, Shareef is continuing to be shady and he's still first on my list to go.

Fast forward to today and Shareef and Trevor are working hard on the challenge. Me and Shareef have been wanting to individually call (or at least I have and he said we could call today) and he tells me to wait until after the challenge. We call after the challenge and he immedietly starts complaining that he needs a break from Skype but then also saying like...he'll do that the next day? Anyway while on call we start talking about the retirement home and we start arguing over who should go since the tribe is obviously picking one of us. He says that he should go because he put in more work to this challenge, and I'm saying I should go because I haven't gone yet. Anyway then he's like should we rock paper scissors it and I suggest we should actually do it with everyone deciding so they can watch but then he decides he has to leave call. Anyway, then I call the real MVP Trevor!!

Trevor is so so nice and so much less shady than Shareef. I tell Trevor everything about me and Monty having the idols and then how it'd be great working with him. Trevor realizes we have "5" of us for merge because I can't let him know how much Monty talks to me about his game and how he's also getting close with Jake (so close he's made a fake final 2, hot damn). I'm glad Trevor brought it up because like yeah...now it doesn't look like we added him later to it. And yeah idk, I just really liked talking to Trevor in general. <3 He's officially one of my new faves BECAUSE ALL OF THE NEW SCHOOLERS ARE SHADY AS FUCK.

Let's get to Brian shall we? I call Monty after I'm finished talking with Trevor and I ask Monty about what's happening with the retirement home decision and he says Shareef is being chosen and tells me the whole conversation that went down, including him attempting to swing it my way by saying "Have they both been?". BRIAN shoots down that idea and says they should send Shareef since he's always been successful in the retirement home. I absolutely hate this because it's obvious that I'm on the bottom of the new schoolers (besides Jeremy he doesn't even count as one anymore TBH) and Shareef will be controlling the idol instead of me and Monty. Anyway, I'm also trying to talk to Brian so he thinks we're close and here's the conversation:

[6/15/2016 9:22:45 PM] Liana: HEy thanks so much for throwing that! And congratulations on poker winnings omg [6/15/2016 9:28:00 PM] Liana: I was wondering what you were thinking about the retirement home [6/15/2016 9:29:20 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): The only person Phil would agree to between you two was Shareef [6/15/2016 9:29:41 PM] Liana: Why does Phil get to decide? I thought just majority did [6/15/2016 9:46:52 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): The hosts wanted a full tribe decision [6/15/2016 9:47:12 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): Idk Phil was pushing for Jules and I was like nah nah nah not happening [6/15/2016 9:57:11 PM] Liana: :/ Well at least it's not her! [6/15/2016 9:58:37 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): yeah exactly [6/15/2016 9:58:41 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): I pulled fo ryou i promise [6/15/2016 10:02:03 PM] Liana: thanks so much! <3 Well I hope Shareef finds something! [6/15/2016 10:02:21 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): Yeah and he should share with us all what it is [6/15/2016 10:08:02 PM] Liana: Yeah I would think. omg our tribe was so quiet after results were posted whereas last time they were celebrating so I think the old schoolers have run out of tricks [6/15/2016 10:08:18 PM] Liana: So that's good news [6/15/2016 10:32:12 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): Hahahaha [6/15/2016 10:32:14 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): Perf

LIKE HE IS BLATANTLY LYING TO ME and I KNOW IT. It's almost as annoying as trying to keep up a convo with him after those one word answers. One of me and Monty's favorite things to do though is to pretend we're dumb as rocks when talking to him so he thinks he's running things. Arrogance really is gonna get you in trouble Brian. Anyway, even more reasons why I've replaced my original Andrew, Monty, me final 3 with a Monty/Trevor/me final 3.

Monty's being awesome right now and playing both sides and planting some great Brian seeds to fake Phil out just in case there is ANOTHER MAGICAL IDOL. Him and Jake are totally playing Phil and I love it. Even though he's planting brian seeds now we both agree that Shareef is going as soon as we have the numbers without him.

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 6: “If You’re Not Nervous You’re Not Playing Tumblr Survivor, Amirite?” - Austin (Part 2)

OKAY SO I GOT THIS EXTRA VOTE AND I AM JUST SO SO SO HYPED. The only person I’ve told is Andrew because he’s the one I trust most right now. It’s deffs going to make sure the numbers are ours when we hit the merge. Also, Austin said he’s pretty sure we’re going to merge at 11 so that would be IDEAL.

So I’m about to submit my vote and I’m so hung up on the fact that Phil MIGHT have an idol, even with his whole funeral thing. So if he’s going to vote for me, I could vote for jake or monty and tie it up, so that andrew and either monty or jake can save me. However in doing that, if Phil doesn’t have an idol I break trust for no clear reason. Which sucks. Phil has been trying to flip monty and jake into voting for Andrew but I think I can trust them enough to not do it, Jakey for sure at least. Why would they go through voting off Josh and Nathan only to flip on us now? That would be crazy.

As for “Phil’s Funeral” I was honestly shocked at how on point his perception of everyone was. Especially me, I know I’m a bit of a show off and like the attention on me. What I’m trying to do is make people think that others don’t like me. By having most of the people who don’t like me get voted out before the jury, I keep that I am “disliked” in peoples minds without actually having bad jury management. At this point, if I were to make it to final 3 (or 2) I doubt that anyone who is on the jury would just outright hate me like Phil and probably Nathan do at this point, except maybe MJ.

anyway, here’s hoping the merge is at 11, and I’mm able to stumble into making it further than I did in Transylvania (which just means surviving the first merge vote).

Byeee

oh p.s. I DID throw that battleship game, ty Liana for giving me the ship placements <3

Okay so it's supposed to be Phil tonight but I can't help but be terrified... What if he has an idol? What if Brian and I are being flipped on? What if Brian's flipping on me too? There isn't much I can do tbh. I can't bring myself to vote out Monty or jakey just for the fact that if Phil is actually supposed to be going then that would probably be a mistake. God I'm just scared. I'm also having war flashbacks because the day Monty voted me out of Burma (recently) he small talked with me and then it just stopped. What if that's happening again??? I'm scared. I don't wanna come in 12/18 again. At least 11/18 please. Or merge tbh?! I guess I'm gonna have to ask the universe to do me a solid again. I've been trying to build up my good karma lately and I know it's a lot to ask @ universe but can you please let this vote take out Phil? And if not Phil then not me please. If Brian goes that would also suck because he just told me he has a vote advantage PLUS we established we trust each other the most. And tbh I think I actually do trust him the most? I still need to be aware of everyone playing an intense individual game but still. I hope I can trust him more. I just don't wanna die. So I'll make it up to you again universe if you could just let me live through this tribal. I know having 3 votes in a row due to throwing go your way is a hell of a stretch but I just... Need this. For me. For my own sanity as a game player and for my own confidence. The only person I'm proving I can do this to is myself. And I want to succeed in what I do here not for anything else but my own peace of mind. I think that's why this game has been so important... And I don't want it to end just yet.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bNvl5WAAKLU

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 6: “If You’re Not Nervous You’re Not Playing Tumblr Survivor, Amirite?” - Austin (Part 1)

I don't have time to make a video so hereeeeee I go.

I'm floored that Nathan left and my plan actually went that perfectly. I turned all of them against Nathan and I'm just still shocked at that. But now my next target is Josh. Josh is obviously super tight with Trevor since Trevor told him that Shareef gave his idol to Monty. So getting out Trevor would leave me in good graces with Phil and free up Trevor who has already been vocal about targeting MJ.

So I got my alliance of Brian, Andrew, Monty and myself to split the vote this round. 2 on Joshua, 2 on Phillip. And then I'm telling Phil I'm doing everything I can to save him and I come up with this plan for him to vote Josh and make sure Josh votes for Brian by me and Phil telling him that we're voting for Brian. This way Josh doesn't vote for Phil and fuck everything up.

The reason I'm doing this is because it frees up Trevor as a potential ally, gains at least a little trust back with Phil, and I still remain in tact with New School and Monty.

I hope these people don't catch on to how much I really am controlling everything. These past two votes have really been my ideas and the only reason these people are leaving is to better my game. I like Josh, but after voting out Nathan there's no way he would have any potential of working with me. I know Phil's a good player, but I know his game. Anyway yeah I hope this vote works out and nothing goes wrong, but yeah.

OH YEAH I FOUND A SAPPHIRE IDOL IN THE RETIREMENT HOME!!!!!! THANKS LAURE XOXOX <3.. I was on call with Shareef when I found out and I told him which I'm hoping doesn't fucking bite me in the ass later. I hope and pray he's loyal to me but Idk people who I thought were loyal have used my idol against me and gotten me voted out. Shareef's ass better be loyal to me or I s2g.

WELL THAT WAS

something.

Honestly good on Phil for not buying Jakey’s bullshit. Obviously he wasn’t going to vote for me with Phil and Josh, I wish I had been more forward with Josh and told him to vote for Phil. Oh well.

Also I realized I never specifically said this but my plan is to 100% get as far as I can with Liana at this point I fucking love this girl and can’t believe I didn’t see it until after our season rip :(

Anyway I think my throwing of the jeopardy was EXTREMELY obvious but idc, I just won’t admit it in words to Phil. Besides that was the only way I would be able to participate and throw, I had things happening IRL so I COULD HAVE let Phil play and potentially win and lose some allies or just be obvious and not care tbh. The tribe is going to back me to play battleship tomorrow and the plan is to once again throw it. Now, at this point I am a LITTLE bit scared of the chance that someone actually warned Phil instead of him figuring it out, in which case there may or may not be at least one other person working against me. Which is fine, but I’d like to think I at the very least have Monty and I know I have Andrew. Idk what the hate everyone has for New School is but it WILL BE THEIR UNDOING. KNOW THAT.

I’m also sort of worried about the connections Shareef and Liana are likely building over on their tribe. Obviously if the tribe were to lose, one of them would go. HOWEVER once we merge that option might be out the window and at least Shareef might be looking to cut me sooner than later (in exactly the same way I am hoping to cut him). Who knows though, I’m not taking this TOO seriously and being way more willing to just sort of put things out their this season instead of being all sneaky and panicky. Goodnight for now, I’ll confess more sins in the morning <3

I wanted Phil gone over Nathan, but "Nathan's a bigger threat. Well get Phil next time. He won't be a problem." Well here we are. No Nathan or Josh, and still a Phil. He wants to do the challenge, and I'm just over here sitting with my biggest "I told you so" face on rn. Ughghghghg -_-

om gomg omogmogmmgg It's KILLING me not being able to pop awf more @phil but this is not the right time. Also I'm still sure both tribes are trying to throw but also this could all be a big ruse and Shareef is with everyone and NuRuhau is gonna get pagonged but WHO KNOWS all I know is I'm havin a gr8 time.

Enjoy 20 Minutes of ME

God nothing is easy in this game. Which I mean is what we signed up for, and I'm really into the stress induced adrenaline of these games but WHEW. We're trying to throw yet another challenge and Phil is trying to save himself and is being petty about us wanting to throw to vote him out. Like... first of all sweaty... the other tribe is trying to throw for you so that's the pot calling the kettle black (sorry bout it!) and second of all... is it not quite obvious we wanna throw again at this point? Tbh get over it!!! Both sides are trying to keep their numbers intact through throwing the challenge so at the end of the day, this is what the dynamic of the game has come to. Don't say your tribe has zero integrity when this is the strategy we decided to play with. And yes at the end of the day it is a strategy. Is it dirty, conniving, and under-handed? Abso-fucking-lutely. And I fucking LOVE it.

me coming online after all the drama i started:

http://i.imgur.com/cMWalaa.gif

Confessionals are manditory now? And here i was sending in like 10 per episode not to get the invisible edit. Today has been a weird day. Its party cloudy, 70 degrees, pretty windy. Oh and all hell broke lose in the one world chat. The guy exposing brian game i freaking conic. Brian like a a pigeon with no head flapping around and now he like dude the old school wants to slaughter new school, now idk if this is paranoia cuz he was exposed or if he is on to something. I am all down for new school sticking together but if its like the titanic and sinking fast sorry but i am gonna jump over board. I rather swim witb the sharks then be eaten. A boy gotta do what a boy gotta do

This is a mess. Omg 🙃 Like everything is a mess. Ask me a question about the game. Is it a mess? Yes.

Jakey blindsiding me with a final 2: https://vine.co/v/O2mEInUizIL

So here's what happened Me on call with Liana: I trust Jakey and Shareef least in our possible alliance Jakey five minutes later: Let's make a duo alliance name! Me: :|

Jules has the gaul to repeatedly demand information while giving nothing in return like sis. Ima be a good little boy and go along with it for now but I can not WAIT to dethrone that alliance. But I have to wait for the perfect moment. Natalie_Anderson_clinking_wine_glasses_with_Jon_and_Jaclyn.gif

http://prntscr.com/bg4fmx I think......I did it....Confessional recapping the call coming tomorrow... things could maybe possibly get really interesting really soon

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 5: “In My Case, You Never Win, You Just Lose.”- Joshua

holy SHIT I’m so happy that vote worked out. I really do like Nathan but he was gunning for me and Andrew and I just couldn’t have that. You got a problem with new school? We gon take u out.

the plan is already up to throw this jeopardy challenge and now I’m ready to do it since the 4 of us will go to the retirement home.

today was honestly just such a good day. I got to meet Sam and Pat AND tribal went well. So perf.

I KNEW SOMETHING WAS UP I FUCKIN KNEW IT I JUST WASNT EXPECTING JAKE OUT OF ALL PEOPLE WOULD FLIP!!!! We got really along on the first night of the swap and I knew he would be at the bottom on the Old School tribe but MAAAAAAAAN THIS SUCKS. Now Phil and me are at the bottom GOD i hate my position right now

Well there are two, maybe 3 lessons, I've learned from this.

1. Fuck I am a horrible Tumblr Survivor player

2. My read was so far off it was like I was reading Dr. Seuss and thinking it was the Art of War

3. Never give someone the courtesy of telling them they're going home because they'll screw over one of your allies and then screw you over the next round.

So yeah I'm just mainly disappointed that, once again, I couldn't make merge or jury. I'm disappointed that I can't seem to ever break double digits, but that's more of a personal preference than anything. And I guess I'm just disappointed that I made blunder after blunder in this game. Overall, it was pretty fun though, 10/10 would recommend, and I really pray Phil, Josh, Shareef, Jules and Trevor pull this out. To the rest of those snakes, I hardly knew ye.

OH MY FUCKING GOD I SURVIVED AGAIN!!!!!!! Holy shit. Holy shi- I ju- Oh my god. My internet dropped before votes were read and I was screeching because I couldn't see what happened and suddenly I got a shit ton of pms of people screaming that I survived a 4-3 vote and WHEW r i p Nathan hello me getting at least 13th. And now I couldn't do the live jeopardy challenge to throw it but like other people were able to throw it so now we're going to tribal which is the plan and we just wanna vote out Phil tbh. Also in someone's voting confessional... I'm just saying that someone say that my game isn't as hidden as I'd like it to be. Hmmmm... HMMMM... Oh well. I just can't believe... I survived Hotel Shitty Wifi. Damn damn damn I'm still screamin.

I didn't know what to say so I made Ryan Teddy Palmer give me interview questions.

1. Which members of your tribe do you trust the most/least?

I trust MJ the most on my tribe. Pretty easy. As of right now, he's definitely my F2. After him, it'd be Austin. As for distrust... I don't trust Trevor. I know Liana isn't on my side, I have no idea where Jeremy's head is, but it's kind of like... when you're out in the woods and you see a big ol black snake, that's fine. Because I know it's not venemous. If I see a copperhead, that's fine, because I know it'll fuq me up and I need to stay away. If I see some snake I'm not familiar with, THAT'S scary. Trevor's an unfamiliar snake. Could be fine, could not be, but it's not worth taking the chance.

2. If you had to go to tribal right now what would be your plan?

Vote out Liana. However I can. I do NOT want her hooking up with Brian and Andrew at merge. Aside from that, I don't care how we do it.

3. What is your ideal alliance in this game?

My IDEAL alliance can't happen now. My ideal alliance is me, MJ, Phil, Austin, Josh, and Nathan, with Jake in there at the bottom and maybe Shareef as like, second string if we need to call him in.

My realistic alliance is me, MJ, Phil (if he doesn't get voted out) Austin, Josh (see: Phil), and Shareef. Which is a whole lot of uncertainty and I am NOT into it.

Anyway, pray for my boys Josh and Phil. I love them. I treasure them. I worry about them.

My game is in shambles. My entire game collapsed in just a matter of minutes. Nathan left, Trevor's mad at me now for spilling the "Shareef gave an idol to Monty" and now Phil and me are stuck together on NuRuhau, lost the immunity challenge AGAIN and now I'm gonna have to throw Phil under the bus just to stay another day. I hate this. I wanted to play with these people but they keep getting snatched from me starting with the Sole vote. But that's Survivor. You win some, you lose some. Or in my case, you never win, you just lose. I honestly have no idea what to do right now. I'm surrounded by drunks and people I don't like. I feel like I'm back on my first year in college lmao. ya boy's getting premerge :\\\\\

me sending two confessionals in a row??? just trying to send as many as i can cos looks like i'm not lasting any longer lmao it's either this round or next round because let's be real, we aint winning another challenge lmfao. I just....I like Brian and all he's like my next favourite person in this tribe next to Phil but I can honestly see right through his bullshit. Also, it's really no use for me anymore to keep the Shareef thing a secret because apparently SOMEONE (Jakey [eyes emoji]) leaked it so I'm gonna try and use that as something to help me stay the next round. New School is targeting winners but their common enemy is Old and Middle School but I'm gonna let them know that Shareef already flipped to Old School and that he gave Monty the idol so Shareef could possibly reel in Monty to go with Old School as well. That means that they can either vote me off, vote Monty out or vote Jakey out. I'm playing dead right now but I know Phil won't be backing down but I don't wanna be messy this round and end up with me getting voted out so right now my vote is locked to Phil and I'll get to work next round. SIGH I hate this. I actually have to get my hands dirty at PREMERGE!!!

Here is a life confessional real quick: I FUCKING GRADUATED HIGH SCHOOL. Ok now back to the game. I was put in a game wilm the comp beasts who keep slaying comps i am so shook!! Hopefully we continue to slay till the merge cuz i dont wanna go to a tribal anytime soon cuz i still have survivor scars from my last one where the newbies did kurt and i so dirty i hate.

A lot. Has. Happened. First and foremost I would just like to address the STUPIDITY that is already present in this season for absolutely no good reason. Jakey, the dumbass, decided it would be a Good Decision™ to NOT ONLY keep New School in the game, BUT ALSO vote out a Middle Schooler, AND isolate ANOTHER Middle Schooler AAAAAAAAANNNNNDDDDDD a fellow New Schooler.

I’ve thought this over for HOURS now, and I still do not see the strategic value in isolating Middle AND Old School. I don’t see the benefit in siding with New School. It’s just not there. It was a stupid and sketchy more for Jake to make, and it put him in a bad position looking down the road IMO.

So after Nathan was booted, a few people started freaking out a bit (myself included). I was under the assumption that Old and Middle would team up to pick off Andrew and Brian, but because that wasn’t the case, people had to readjust after tribal council. At this point, Phil feels like he’s at the bottom, and it will either be him or Josh leaving (hopefully Josh, I guess). I don’t think Jakey and Monty plan on flipping and working with them to vote out Andrew or Brian -- Jakey because he’s dumb, and Monty because he’s probably in a solidified group of Liana/Andrew/Brian/Monty. There isn’t much Phil/Josh can do other than hope it’s the other person that the majority wants out.

If Jakey decides to target and vote out Phil, it will be the second nail in his coffin. I reached out to him to let him know that we cannot sacrifice Old School numbers heading into the merge. But Jakey, at this point, has already pretty much screwed up everything. Even if he keeps Phil safe this round, there’s probably one more round (at least) before the merge, so if Ruhau loses again, it’ll likely be either Phil or Jake, in turn causing the Old School numbers to decrease. Furthermore, while Middle School continues get picked off, New School is staying in tact, again, thanks to Jake. If Mapu never loses a challenge before the merge, NS can VERY EASY go into the merge with a solid 5 AND with Trevor and Monty wanting to work with them (again, thanks to Jake). And though Shareef says he’s not with NS anymore, he did slip up and say that NS doesn’t KNOW that he’s not with them, and that makes me paranoid that maybe this is just one big scam, and that he’ll end up siding with them anyways when the time comes.

If we merge at 11, and worst case scenario is: Shareef lying about NOT being with NS & Josh and Phil getting picked off back-to-back, this is what the merge group alliances would likely look like:

If we merge @ 11 w/ Jsh and Phil leaving, BUT Shareef IS telling the truth, this is what it will look like: 

 // Jakey is at the bottom of whichever group he decided to go with.

Update: Phil just messaged me, “I'm pretty sure I'm the target.” At this point it looks like they’ll be splitting 2-2 on Josh/Phil, so Phil is gonna try to get Josh to “vote with him,” and then he’s gonna vote out Josh. Whew. Anyways.

This season is now a complete mess and, for me, is completely up in the air due to Jake’s poor decision making.

I don’t think I’ll be able to get all of my thoughts out very well via text, so I’ll do a video conf. later to lay everything out, really.

But just to close this out, I’m SUPPOSED to go to the Retirement Home today, in a perfect world I would find an idol that I can give to Phil to use tonight. Though, it would make more sense to give an idol to whichever one of Josh/Phil survives tribal so they can use it next round, and I don’t have to ~~throw the challenge. But I’m anxious and I want Phil to be safe because I want him to do well. It’s likely that I won’t find an idol though, but if I were to get some kind of advantage, I think a double vote or a vote spy (where ur notified of somebody’s vote -- who they voted for, as soon as they submit it).

I think I’m in a very tricky place in the game right now where I have to trust people that I don’t want to trust, so that sucks, but I’m gonna do the best I can.

Here is verbatim the confessional I wrote on my phone drunk last night:

I'm adodrunk

I juust won't king mithafuvkkjaaa

bath was cool

I men Nathan

Sober translation:

I very intoxicated.

I also just won a very fun game of kings cup mother fucker!

Nathan was cool

I mispelled "Nathan" as "Bath" so this is a sentence correcting that.

Yeah it was a fun night. :)

Okay so the vote tonight should en dup being 2 josh, 2 phil, and 2 whoever phil and josh think jakey is gonna vote for with them. It might be me, idk, idc as long as the revote goes according to plan. I personally like Josh and think he might be willing to come over to our side once we hit the merge. Ideally we would get out MJ, Austin, and Trevor because they scare me the most tbh, and then turn some tables around on Shareef since he is so very scary as well. From there I hope to make it far with Liana but we'll just have to see how the whole thing plays out.

Also I just did the retirement home and flopped HARD oh well hopefully I'll get to go back at some point.

I'll probably have more to say about my position once the votes are revealed tn

forget if I submitted this last night so I'm gonna just send it now in case I didn't

holy SHIT I’m so happy that vote worked out. I really do like Nathan but he was gunning for me and Andrew and I just couldn’t have that. You got a problem with new school? We gon take u out.

the plan is already up to throw this jeopardy challenge and now I’m ready to do it since the 4 of us will go to the retirement home.

today was honestly just such a good day. I got to meet Sam and Pat AND tribal went well. So perf.

There's not much to talk about because everything keeps going according to plan. Nathan was successfully blindsided (although Monty and I would've preferred seeing Phil gone) and then the immunity challenge was successfully thrown to us again.

I never watched it, but the trivia seemed like it was easily thrown (albeit obvious from Brian). I'm hoping that since it was obvious Brian was throwing it that he would be targeted before Monty or Andrew ever would, in case Josh/Phil have an idol or something.Throwing the attack/balance/defend game was so much harder and required so much coordination from everyone. I've honestly talked with the other tribe more than I have my own which is terrible which is why I really don't want to go to tribal. I'm just sitting here waiting for merge to hurry up.

Anyway Trevor is coming to me slightly worried saying "when it's final 12 and the only alliance I have is the penguin alliance and we haven't talked" so I'm gonna call him later today and see how he's feeling/make him feel better. Me, Shareef, Andrew, Monty, Brian, and Jake will need to pull in another person if it's a 12 person merge so I'm hoping Trevor will be that person for us.

Ok, so first, this happened 

Then, tribal went as planned. I wanted Phil gone, but it wasn't worth it to argue against all three of them for it, better stay with the four than Nathan. Then, Brian and Jakey threw the challenge which was great!!!! (Drunk) Phil messaged me wondering if they had thrown it and I was like THAT'S BULL SHIT! Even though I knew exactly that they threw it. So, now the plan is to split 2-2 on Josh and Phil, but I'm super nervous about a vote doubler, so that instead of a 2-2-2 then 3-0 revote, it would be a 3-2-2 and that I'd probably be gone. So now I'm trying to decide if I should take the idol from Liana and play it if things get sketchy, or take the risk and leave it with her. I've made by first two goals, not be first boot, and improve my placement from Kiwayu, and it's F13, so YAY!! Now, make merge, outlast 6 people, and last 22 days, then all my goals will be met.

And I realized last night I have no group allinces left in this game. Idk how this happened. Today I've really gone to work on building connections with people on my tribe so that hopefully I'm included in things.

I feel sick to my stomach and I'm not even going to tribal...

Phil's taking a massive risk tonight, a huge leap of faith. He's gonna follow through with the hopeful 3-2-1 plan in which Josh leaves (and the 4 splits 2-2), so I wont be giving him the idol....

Im gonna feel EXTREMELY guilty for not forcing him to play the idol to get through this vote, but him not playing the idol tonight benefits both of our games as long as he gets thru this vote....

i dont know. i dont know. i hate not being confident in my decisions, i hate being afraid, i hate feeling insecure about move that i make and dont make. tonights gonna be rough if phil leaves.

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Draft Results

With the final tally after the Fan/Host Fave awards the Draft is officially over!

Congratulations Kait for winning with 189 points!

Jessy and Pippa you were very closing training with 185 and 184 points!

Thanks for participating everyone!

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Fan Fave/Host Fave Results!

Congratulations Monty for coming away with 26.6% of the vote and winning the Fan Fave poll!

Mandy and I also picked our own favorites to be recognized for their hard work in the game. Also, since it was very clear our favorites were Shareef and Jakey we decided to pick a juror each so that you losers weren’t left out.

Mandy has selected MJ has her host fave and Ryan has selected Phil as his host fave! Congrats everyone and keep up with more confessionals coming tomorrow!

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 4: “The Vote Seems Locked” - Nathan (Part 3)

There are very few things that faze me while playing Survivor, not including getting voted out. And that's losing a tribal immunity challenge, and having your alliance exposed. Guess who had both of those happen to him in less than an hour? That's right. This guy did. So we basically lost Rock Paper Scissors earlier, which sucks even more cause they used fricking smart moves to win it. Like who does that? Use smart moves to win a tactical challenges? The audacity. So now yeah I'm stuck going to tribal with a close ally, a person who I tried to vote out, and 4 people I've never played with before. This is gonna be so darn fun. Now I thought it would be smooth sailing from here since almost right away, Phil roped myself, Jake and Josh into an alliance. Perfect people, perfect allies. I thought I was locked and ready to go. I was ready to slay some shit. When we're doing the damn screenshots to find out who's going to retirement home. Phil's screenshot, Phil's goddamn motherfucking screenshot, has a message from me, in the same alliance chat. And it's like ajdowiodiwidowqifhaudjwjeisakdsi. I'm very scared right now that Brian saw. Cause yeah we may be in the majority right now but as long as Brian possibly holds that information, even if we vote out who we want, he could always pull a Bernel. And um I got exposed once, really not gonna let that happen again. So thanks Phil XD

So...I pulled a Jules. When we were "randomly" choosing someone from the other tribe to go to retirement, I posted a screenshot that had a freakin call goin on in the background! Only person that was one who I didn't need to see it was Brian. I have ZERO idea if he did. Shit. So I deleted it and said "oh, whoops, I randomized it EIGHT times instead of SEVEN! Guess I'll need to redo it!" This whole randomizing bullcrap only happen because Brian's "random" selection would have given the chance to find an idol to Liana. Can't have that shit, since she seems to be the target of the other tribe. Anyways, now we need to figure out who to vote and I have limited options. I've built some webs over here to keep myself safe but tribe swaps always have the potential to end me. If Jake flips the script then good on him, but I am committed to him at this point so maybe not. Guess we'll find out soon...

I dont feel good about this vote. It's TOO quiet

AAAAHHH okay so it's official that we threw the challenge which is horrifying. And of course there's the possibility for something to go wrong because ya know, Murphy's law: "what can go wrong, will go wrong you dumb fucks!" That thing going wrong being that Nathan thinks he's orchestrating a unanimous vote against me. Nice. Which ya know it might happen! I might die tbh! If I go home because of a challenge throwing I am going to delete my skype, get rid of my tumblr account, factory reset my laptop, bash it with a hammer for good measure, and move in to live with the Amish. I really like Nathan but honestly!? Go home. Don't play buddy buddy with everyone and then put together some anti new school alliance thinking you can get away with it. Which, if he doesn't go home tonight he'll get what's coming to him eventually because I know people will not let him get that far with a sneaky social game like that. Also can you believe I might not be here for my death tribal? Either people flip or an idol is played on Nathan and I go and fuck myself for getting involved with this game. Why am I being targeted at the 2 tribals I go to? I dunno. Also that would be disgusting if I left on my second tribal again like in Uncharted. Ugly as shit. I know I did this last time but I'm low-key writing this like my last confessional. And I'm writing this at a grad party so I should probably stop. Ugh this is so fucking annoying. If this doesn't work and Nathan doesn't go home (or in general I just don't survive) I'm gonna say this: don't fucking throw challenges kids. Fun in theory. Horrifying in practice.

So at this point the vote seems locked for Andrew. I like the guy, he's a nice kid but he's talked the least to me so far. So he gotta go. Also I have no idea how Monty found out about the vote, but I do like the fact that he came to me so that he could confirm the vote. If he's not completely playing me, then it shows that I at least still have some sort of bridge with Monty and maybe we can work something out down the road. Also I'm trying to dumb myself down with Phil. Like if he thinks that I'm more strategically inept with him and that I'll follow his every step and move, I think he'll let down his guard with me hopefully let me in on some secrets that I shouldn't hear. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Two problems with this. First, I may not even make it past this tribal, and two, acting's never been my strong suit. So um, yeah, this should be interesting.

[survivorgenerations-blog]

Episode 4: “The Vote Seems Locked” - Nathan (Part 2)

Who wants some boilin hawt tea??????? SO I'm just sitting around minding my own business at like 1 in the morning and suddenly Monty pms me that he wants to go on a call about something and I'm like okay good shit good shit good shit because I just solidified an alliance with him and Brian as well as Jakey who was apparently at the bottom of Old School. Yeah that happened btw. The alliance is called the The Four Symbols Alliance and I guess it seems legit but NOW it seems even more legit with the shit Monty told me. So essentially him and Liana really want to bring me in to be a solid group of three which I am totally down for. I know that Monty and Liana are definitely closer to each other than I am either of them but that's okay because I'm going into every alliance I'm in with the mentality of "do NOT under ANY circumstances let these people cut you first." But anyway that seems solid and basically Monty wants our alliance of four to meet up with Liana and Shareef which is great for me because those are essentially all of my allies. Now the tea don't stop there because the reason Monty wants to do a lot of this is so that we can fight off an opposing alliance run by MJ that's basically everyone else not involved in this hypothetical six (aside from maybe Nathan who we wanna bring in?) and it's just very intimidating because we mighta let Jeremy slide on in there. Like, Monty basically went into how we should throw this next challenge to keep Liana and Shareef and safe AND ALSO vote out Phil if it looks like we have the numbers because apparently "Middle School is playing in a way that they'll just go where they find numbers." So I have a lot to think about. I'm involved in technically four alliances right now and I'm just constantly screeching. Also the fact that we may actually throw a challenge has me constantly screeching. I mean if we do throw it for the sake of trying to keep an alliance strong going into merge... what's the worst that can happen? Instant death.

So I woke up this morning and everything planned out last night between myself, Monty, and Liana kinda just hit me and I only now realize what is happening. The words "we're throwing a fucking challenge" escaped my mouth and I just-

In hindsight, idoling out Sole, who is beloved by the community, probably won't be good when I return to chats, but I'm just over here, reveling that I'm slaying faves like https://vine.co/v/hVrXYYQIKwP So now, hopefully everything goes right, and the little alliance that is forming between Liana, Shareef, Andrew, Brian, Jakey, and myself, can merge with equal numbers, or a numbers advantage over MJ and his friends. Then we can go and get out the other fan faves, and I'll still be cackling away https://vine.co/v/M9h2D3pt6iJ

*Keith Nale voice* Stick to the plan!

On the phone with Jake now and I think i explained enough how its best to take out Phil and I think he agrees hes just worried of the backlash which is valid but a lot better than if MJ hits the merge with his wedding invitation that includes 10 plus ones. Wish we could take out Nathan but hes a little slut in everyones bed so not yet. But boy you wait I'm going to blow the sheets off when the time is right. Right now i need to celebrate that at least I'm not going home and pray that the next immunity is something that Hapu can win because them throwing it was a one use get out of jail free card. If i want immunity again we gon have to earn it. And that's what has me nervous is if MJ sees his friend is gone he might want to throw so fuckckckckkckckckckckck. Hello rock, its me hard place.

I’m so mad god So apparently Nathan made an alliance with Jakey, Phil, and Josh and was deciding between Andrew and Me as who they should vote out. He decided Andrew because he thinks he “has me” which is like ASFHFDSGHKDFG yeah because I trust you so why wouldn’t you also trust me??? idk. This could all be BS and its convenient that Jakey is the person on both sides of the tribe’s alliances. That’s the spot that I WANT ugh. [2016-06-10, 10:34:41 PM] Nathan Cooper: What is deathly cold to you [2016-06-10, 10:35:00 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): like [2016-06-10, 10:35:06 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): minus 25 celcius [2016-06-10, 10:35:21 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): like I’m not a baby when it comes to cold I’m canadian af [2016-06-10, 10:35:21 PM] Nathan Cooper: (shake) [2016-06-10, 10:35:24 PM] Brian (Kauai Host): but its fucking cold As cold as your FUCKING HEART NATHAN.

Ok i'm getting so sick of losing to be honest. When will I start to get lucky?? Anyways, I'm in an alliance right now with Jakey, Phil and Nathan. Basically, Old + Middle School minus Monty. Do I like Monty? Yes. A LOT actually. Do I trust him? Not for one second! After he pulled that stunt at the Pakari TC? NO WAY and the fact that he has tons of connections with New School's a bit worrisome too! The tentative plan right now is to vote out Andrew because of reasons I actually don't remember because I wasn't paying attention to the call my alliance had. Speaking of alliances, Phil accidentally fucked up and showed a screenshot of his desktop with out alliance group chat in it FUCK!!! He took too long to delete it too someone's bound to see it rip. But with that mishap i think we're now "forced" to work together wouldn't you say? I trust this alliance a lot but man, I'm actually nervous. Only Brian has spoken to me and I'm just being all cautious and stuff. Monty and Andrew never came online today too I think. Ugh this game's making me wayyyy too paranoid.