Sisterhood of the Traveling Poems

Mindy, Jess, Ellie, Clara, Katy, Tina. We write things.

[swagteamdeltasix]

clinging to the edge of the bed

I felt like the space between my ribs had become a poisoned inkwell,

and my one question: when did “I love you” become a damn death sentence?

[swagteamdeltasix]

Sestina I wrote called Get Away Car

I heard through the grape-vine that you called me a thimble,

Because I am guarded and small.

But I bet that you think you are a mountain.

I could agree, big, stubborn and cold.

I thought I had finally found love somewhere in your hair

But I really found it in the drivers seat of my car.

  After the break-up I spent 14 hours in my car.

I never felt so much like a thimble,

Driving in my tiny silver car, my head lighter without you and my hair.

The mid-west made me feel very small

As I tried my hardest to get into the wind, out of the cold

And away from the mountains.

  I used to love the mountains

And part of me still does, but I never got out of the car.

I love the chill, but I am sunshine and you are the cold.

You made me feel like a mouse with the shield of a thimble,

Brave in my own way, but even with a sword I felt small.

To lighten my heart I took that sword and sliced away my hair.

  Don’t get egotistical, you are not why I cut my hair.

But it helped knowing you liked the way it felt when it brushed the mountain,

After I fell of course. And when you laughed I didn’t want to be small.

I wanted to be brave and strong and fast like my getaway car.

But it didn’t help that I could still fit under a thimble.

I decided if I wanted to grow I couldn’t do it in the cold.

  At the beginning, you held me when it was cold.

I loved the smell of your airy, light hair.

I wasn’t pushing, I had no need for a thimble.

We were something of force, we were our own mountain.

It didn’t matter where we went, but we always took your car.

You made me like being so small.

  But now I am done with being small.

I am tired of hating the cold.

I can drive my own fucking car.

Even if you made me a raw gory creature, I can cut my tie to you, I can cut my hair.

You don’t control the rest of the mountains.

The needle goes nowhere without the thimble.

I thought you were a mountain and I was a thimble

But as it turns out you are a very small mountain

And I am a very big thimble.

[buttonpoetry]

Fatimah Asghar // “Red”

"Lover, I’m not afraid of the red drip budding between my thighs."

"Red" is an award-winning hand-drawn animation created by Loveholdletgo, written by Fatimah Asghar of Dark Noise Collective. Co-directed by Beyon and Jess X Chen. Sound design by Anders Link, and Music by Beyon and Milo & Otis.

 ”Red” was screened nationally at the 2014 Asian American International Film Festival, Animation Block Party, and received awards from Yale Environmental Film Festival, Asians on Film, and more.

[swagteamdeltasix]

hey guys so i've recently decided to write my memoirs (in the loosest sense of the word) and I'm almost done with writing about this one night so i'm probably gonna post about it tomorrow it's a great very stereotypical college story you'll love it i promise

[swagteamdeltasix]

im thirsty as fuck i really just want the d  god dammit boys suck how did i do this my potential fwb lives in istanbul seriously tho he was exactly my type tall dark and lanky

he looked like nat wolff idk if you know this  nat wolff's attractive

seriously though istanbul? literally five thousand miles away

I know that im wrong the world doesn't owe me dick but it wouldnt hurt  i sexed a guy who goes to school in boston. I  live in tennessee. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck sigh sigh sigh sigh sigh sigh sigh  fuck i'm stupid

[swagteamdeltasix]

mosaic

by the technical definition, we are not a broken family. my parents don't have the money, time, or energy for the lawyers, the court dates, the details of a financial split-- they don't want to face the fact that they'd be splitting zero. so instead they'll keep on yelling and pelting each other with loud sarcastic bullets that tear through our ears more painfully than blatant insults. by the technical definition, no, we are not a broken family. but we're cracked, and we're cracking more with each day that goes by and the phone doesn't ring, my father doesn't get off the couch, and charity begins to feel numb. and I start to wonder if we were ever a whole, ever, by the technical definition, healthy or if we have always just been some ugly mosaic, disparate pieces hastily stuck together by some starving artist who gets off from breaking glass. and I wonder why that motherfucker chose to drown me in glue, and I wonder, if I become jagged enough, if I'll ever be able to chip myself away.

[swagteamdeltasix]

Allison

silver girl, you didn’t deserve this this fading light and this blood on your lips this wound and this pain on your father’s face and this I love you on your lips guardian girl, you never wanted this to protect your friends, yes but to leave them was never part of the plan you wanted an After, an education, a wedding, anything but to leave them hero girl, you gave your gloved hand to the one who needed you, and your young heart to the one you needed in that moment of exhilaration and terror, when you felt the slowing of your breath, your voice and your young heart a heart that didn’t deserve what it got in the end, a heart gilded in gold. golden girl, you died a warrior’s death but you deserved a queen’s.

[swagteamdeltasix]

I Cried Again Tonight

Every time I build myself up— craft my arguments, plan every possible word and intake of breath— one syllable spilled from your lips and all of my fury has leaked out of my tears. Just once, could YOU cry? Just once, could you get angry, feel weak, feel needy and stupid and pathetic and just so goddamn confused. I love you so much. It scares my mother because she knows I would run away with you right now if I could. But would you do the same? One year ago, I would say yes, you would. But I have tasted an air without your sweet nothings, without your laughter. I have clutched my pillow and tried not to imagine it was you. So I know that I can’t completely trust in our forevers. When I cry, it’s because, above all else, I am a coward.

[swagteamdeltasix]

(I haven't written in here in forever, I've barely written at all, and I hate it)

if you knew how much I crave you every second would you say the same

[swagteamdeltasix]

looking down my arm, seeing streaks of glazed reds and pinks. i see stories waiting to be read. unashamed, still afraid but too late to turn away. i think you and your scars are beautiful, love. and i'll share mine if you share yours.

[swagteamdeltasix]

when you're passed out on the couch and someone touches your hair all the energy you can muster goes into opening your eyes  to see him standing above you close them again  here's hoping he can't see you

all you can do is think this is how it happens in movies this is what it feels like to get drugged this would be so easy for him

but there's only so much you can do when you can't move and your thoughts can.

SIDENOTE: nothing actually happened, i am fine. I was at a party and I got pretty fucked up and passed out. I couldn't move but I was still conscious and these were my thoughts- there was this weird guy who had a thing for me and I felt him touch my hair as he walked past me once so i looked up and he was sort of standing there and it was scary because I legitimately couldn't move or talk. But I had a bunch of friends there looking out for me, all of which could have kicked his drunk ass. Also the guy had a mustache, which upped the sketch level a lot.

[swagteamdeltasix]

you’re the acoustic version of a perfect song: always the best one.

[swagteamdeltasix]

Flappy Satan

you you pixelated harbinger of doom you monster with botox lips. cold, dead, all-seeing eyes. that Ill-proportioned body Defies the laws of physics And insists I fail over And over Over again.

But no matter how much I despise you I always open you back up.

 Fuck you.

[swagteamdeltasix]

the other day when I was tripping major ballsack I knew I had those three

but I wanted one more

[swagteamdeltasix]

I feel like someone had torn some part of me out  and left it on the floor for me to watch dissipate

and the person who could  pick it up and hold me  until it stuck back in was stuck in a string of ones and zeros

[swagteamdeltasix]

You’re my go to.

We get each other.

You’re the older brother I never had and always needed.

You’re the first face this face saw. and I’ll never let you forget it. 

[swagteamdeltasix]

you can't transpose this sudden sadness

it’s when I hear a song like this relaxing and bone-chilling and stunning that I wish I could play it for you in person instead of all caps texting you until you’ve assured me you’re listening.