A Tangled Web (Spider HRT Story)
Chapter 1
âThis is stupid. Why am I doing this?â
This question echoed in my head as I sat in the sterile waiting room of the doctor's office, accompanied by the sound of the clock ticking away in the background. Besides me and the receptionist behind the counter, there was no one else in the room. That made sense. With it being a few days before Christmas, who would willingly want to spend any amount of that time in such a depressing location?
A twenty-five year old woman dissatisfied with her life and seeking a new one, apparently.
As I sat there waiting for permission to see the doctor, my mind drifted back to how I got here. It was half a year ago where I first vented frustration over my life to my best friend Elisa, and she mentioned how I might be going through species dysphoria. She then sent me some articles and links and suggested I look into humanity removal therapy, or HRT.
I had been vaguely aware of humanity removal therapy, often referred to as therian HRT, for a few months by that point. It functioned mostly like hormone replacement therapy, only it would gradually change the patient into a human/animal hybrid, or therian. It was a recent development, only having been available to the public for a little over five years, and still had quite a bit of controversy associated with it from various political groups. Despite that, based on the testimonials I read and the various pictures I saw, the people who have gone through therian HRT seemed to be happier now than they ever had as humans. Maybe it would be worth it if I gave the whole thing a shot. Maybe being in another body might help me be happy again.
I glanced down at the blank screen of my phone, looking over myself in annoyance. I noted the long, messy brown hair that I barely made look presentable. I noted the pale skin caused by a lack of social interaction and preferring the light of a screen over the sun. I noted the oval-shaped glasses and casual hoodie and sweatpants that hid as much of me as possible. I was another drop of water in the ocean that was humanity. Even my blue eyes, once bright and full of hope, had started to appear dim and non-descript as of late.
âTaylor Thompson?â
I snapped out of my thoughts as the doctor called my name. Turning my head in his direction, I got a good look at the man who would be deciding my future. He was an older gentleman, probably in his 50s or 60s, with a grey receding hairline and mustache. His thick, round glasses made it hard for me to see his eyes. Grabbing my belongings, I quietly followed the doctor as he guided me to his office. The office was what I expected to see: a small, plain white room with a desk, degrees on the wall, and bookshelves full of books that I would be too dumb to properly understand. On the desk was a small nameplate that read âDr. T. H. Erian, Species Dysphoria Specialistâ in large, clean letters. I set my bag beside me and took my seat, my heart beating like a drum in my chest. I swallowed the lump of anxiety that was forming in my throat. There was no turning back now.
âSo, Miss Thompson, what brings you here today?â Dr. Erian asked in a stern voice. One sentence in and I was already having flashbacks to my high school principal. The main difference here, however, was that my answers actually mattered for more than avoiding detention.
âI, um, was hoping to be prescribed therian HRT. Specifically spider HRT.â I answered, trying to remain calm and collected.
âI see⊠and why a spider, if I may ask?â The doctor questioned as he began writing something on a piece of paper in front of him.
âWell, I think spiders are a lot like me. Most people are scared of them, but in reality theyâre mostly just nervous, adorable little beans.â I explained with a bit of blush on my face.
âAny preferred species of spiders?â
âI was hoping to be a tarantula. They're cute and fluffy, and I think I'd look just as good as one.â
âMay I ask why you wish to undergo humanity removal therapy?â
I took a deep breath and exhaled. âI've been unhappy with myself lately. My diet's been awful, I rarely go outside and interact, and in general I just hate everything about myself. My best friend, Elisa Andrews, thinks I might be going through species dysphoria. She works with therians and otherkin daily, so I assume she's right.â I explained to Dr. Erian. I then handed him a folder that contained the paperwork Elisa told me I'd need before being prescribed therian HRT: a medical examination, two psychological evaluations, written support from her and my father. I even spiced the folder up with doodles of webs and cartoon spiders in hopes that it would help my case.
Dr. Erian looked through the paperwork I gave him. I was unable to get a good idea of what he was thinking. His flat, emotionless voice was hard to read, and thanks to those glasses I couldn't tell whether he was impressed by work or annoyed at me wasting his time. I was hoping it was the former.
âMiss Thompson, before we continue, I'd like to ask an important question.â Dr. Erian spoke as he set the folder down in front of him on the desk. âHow much do you know about therians?â
âHow much do I know?â I asked curiously. âI mean, my best friendâs a physical therapist that works with therians, and I'm kinda aware of some of the legislature that's been passed recently-â
âThat's not what I am referring to.â Dr. Erian interrupted. âI want to know if you understand what therians go through, what the process of going through humanity removal therapy is like and how you'll have to adapt. You are aware that I recommend patients spend some time living as their desired species before I prescribe them HRT, correct?â
âI-I mean⊠if it helps I have a few spider plushies.â I said sheepishly. I could already feel my luck running out.
Dr. Erian sighed and gently rubbed at his forehead before speaking again. âMiss Thompson, this is a serious life-changing procedure. Once you start therian HRT, your DNA will be rewritten to match your chosen species. You'll never be human again, even if you stop early into your therapy. I cannot prescribe it to just anyone who steps foot into my office.â
I sunk into my seat slightly, bringing my knees just under my chin as I almost curled up to feel safe and protected. âB-but⊠I was told you can help people with this kind of stuff.â
âI can, and I do. However, not everyone needs HRT. What you may think is species dysphoria could very well just be depression, and what you may need is something far simpler than a complete genetic rewrite.â The doctor explained.
I sat there in silence, barely listening to the doctor's words. He was saying so much when it all boiled down to one word: âno.â No, I couldn't get humanity removal treatment. No, I couldn't have happiness. No, I was doomed to hate myself for the rest of my miserable life. Tears started to creep their way out of my eyes, stinging slightly as they worked their way down my cheeks.
Just as I was about ready to give up and head home, I glanced up and noticed Dr. Erian looking through my papers once more. I was expecting him to scold me again. I hid my face against my knees and closed my eyes, bracing myself for his harsh words to wound my heart further.
â...are you sure becoming a tarantula will make you happy?â
I slowly brought my eyes up to look at Dr. Erian, not fully emerging from my self-made cocoon as I processed his question. What was making him change his mind? Did he believe that I'm suffering from species dysphoria after all, or was he simply taking pity on me? Regardless of the answer, I couldn't let this opportunity slip by my fingers.
âY-yes⊠yes it will, doctor.â I responded, almost forcing myself to do so. A tense silence hung in the air for what felt like hours as Dr. Erian stared at me, almost examining me. I gripped the sides of my legs, waiting anxiously for either him to continue lecturing me or for me to have the courage to speak again.
âWell, if that is your answer, then I will approve you for tarantula HRT.â Dr. Erian said, writing on the piece of paper some more. âConsidering it's the holiday season, it's likely your pharmacy won't receive your first dosage until after the new year, though.â
My heart almost skipped a beat at the news. I was⊠actually going to be a tarantula?! âWait, really? You're⊠approving me for the HRT?â I asked, nearly jumping out of my seat. âOh thank you Doc! Thank you very, very much!â
Dr. Erian sighed, writing some more information down on the paper. âAs I explained, transitioning to a different species won't be easy. There will be some side effects to expect as your body changes.â He explained, making sure I had calmed down a bit before he continued. âNot all therians will experience the same side effects. Not all side effects will be present at once. Some will show up at different stages of your transition. At the earliest stages of spider HRT, I would primarily expect to see itchy skin as your hair grows in, as well as weight gain to provide material for your additional body parts to develop. Beyond that, you may experience headaches, nausea, dizziness, fatigue, and possible body pain.â
After making sure I understood the side effects I might encounter during my transition, Dr. Erian started digging through a drawer in his desk, and from there pulled out two items. The first was a pamphlet that had âWelcome to your Humanity Removal Therapyâ written on the cover, alongside âSpecies: Spiderâ and a minimalist illustration of him. âThis pamphlet will help guide you through your transition, Miss Thompson. It provides details on a recommended meal plan, the type of environment you should live in, a rough timeline of what changes you should expect and when you should expect them, a full list of potential side effects, and more.â The doctor explained. âI would make sure to give this a thorough read if I were you. I'll also be sending you a digital copy after our meeting. If you have any questions, feel free to ask me and I will provide an answer at the earliest convenience.â
I took the pamphlet in my hands, almost crushing it in excitement. âOf course Doc. I'll definitely give it a read once I get home.â
Just as I was about to get up and leave, Dr. Erian cleared his throat. âThere is one other thing I must discuss with you before we conclude here, Miss Thompson.â He said, causing me to sit back down in my seat. âI still disapprove of you not doing any research on therian culture prior to our meeting. So⊠I'd like for you to interact with other therians while you're taking HRT. It's not mandatory, but I do feel it will not only help you learn about your new lifestyle but also potentially help with your mood.â
As Dr. Erian said that, he handed another item. I took it in my hands and looked it over. Instead of another pamphlet, it was a flyer detailing a therian support group that was close to where I lived. It detailed that it was bi-weekly, and that it was open to those on HRT, regardless of stage, as well as those questioning.
âI'll keep that all in mind. Thank you so much for all of this, Doc.â I said, stuffing the papers in my bag. After discussing insurance and other important information to get my prescription set in stone, I left the office and gave a heavy exhale as soon as I was outside. That was probably the most stressful talk I've ever had, but it was done and over with. While I stood outside and caught my breath, my phone started buzzing. Pulling it out, I saw that I was getting a call from Elisa.
âSo, how'd it go?â Elisa asked, sounding exceedingly curious. Looking at the time on my phone, I hadn't realized she had just finished with work by the time I finished my meeting.
âWell, I managed to get the prescription, so that's good. You didn't tell me he was gonna be so scary though.â I answered back with a tiny bit of irritation in my voice.
âHey I never met the guy personally. Besides, you still got the HRT in the end, so it all worked out.â Elisa answered back. âSo how long before you start spinning webs and crawling up walls?â
âWell, my first dosage won't arrive until after the new year. Beyond that, wellâŠâ I trailed off a bit, glancing back at my bag and the papers inside of it. âI have some homework to do.â
---
NEXT:
Chapter 2: My car pulled up to an empty parking space in front of the local recreation center. The grey, nondescript building was something
Welcome everyone! This is the start of a (hopefully) long-term project I intend to work on. This is the story of Taylor Thompson, a 25-year-old woman seeking a change in life through humanity removal therapy. In the process of transitioning from human to spider, she'll learn more about the world of therians, as well as learn more about herself and what she wants out of life.
I want to thank @ayviedoesthings, @welldrawnfish, @entroart, @bubbleverseart, @nyxisart, @prettiestplatypus, @deadeyedfae, @kaylasartwork, and anyone else I may have forgotten (there's a lot of people I'm so sorry ><) for creating the world of therian HRT and creating such a community, as well as my fiancé for showing them to me and for inspiring me to give my own version a try. I can't say when the second chapter will be done, so just keep your eyes open, and I hope you all will join me on this long, wild ride.
Thank you so much in advance.
















