For a moment, the King’s Lion, the merciless, skilled soldier, the heir to a dynasty, disappeared, and he was just a boy. Vulnerable, frightened, all large eyes in a too white face and dark hair tousled because no matter what he did he couldn’t get it to keep in any semblance of order. For a moment, he looked at her, and although his mannerisms, his careful nature often made him seem older, it was easy to see how young he was, barely a step from adolescence. Still in some ways learning what it was to be a man with so much pressure upon those narrow shoulders.
And then he fought it, his eyes dropping because they were burning unpleasantly, teeth dragging against his own lower lip, trying to remain impassive and brave. The attempt made him seem perhaps even younger than he was before, trying to hide fear and uncertainty behind a mask of bravery. He jumped, minutely, as she took his face into her hands, but didn’t fight it, keeping his eyes averted still.
His big eyes flicked up to her at those words, and then remained reluctantly. They were shimmering with something that almost looked like tears. He didn’t want to die here, to see the only people he had any closeness to die here. He didn’t want to deal with pirates, or legends, or sirens, or hints about a man he never met. He just wanted to go home, but his home had died with his mother, and there was nothing for him now. His only home was the Endeavour. His life was sold to the sea.
But he looked at her, as if she was a beloved big sister that might impart some wisdom, and for an instant, the usual protector asked wordlessly for her protection, and for her comfort. He knew that trust wouldn’t matter if they had numbers, but maybe, just maybe, they could—“S-sow discord,” he whispered. “Make t-them t-turn against each other? Might b-be w-worth a s-shot.” He laughed softly, miserably, as she ruffled his hair, blinking back tears. “Oh, I know,” he told her softly. “I know.” Matthias wiped some of the tears that had escaped on his sleeve.
“S-shit. I’m not s-supposed to cry.”