give me a scotch. i'm starving.

“I've got a bad case of the 3:00 am guilts - you know, when you lie in bed awake and replay all those things you didn't do right? Because, as we all know, nothing solves insomnia like a nice warm glass of regret, depression and self-loathing.” ― D.D. Barant, Dying Bites Exclusive RP Blog with Divided We Fall

[tableformrstank-archive-blog]

pride is not the word i’m looking for || steve rogers & tony stark

[tableformrstank-archive-blog]

bruised-soldier-heart:

The feeling that he shouldn’t be here gets worse the more Tony talks. And it doesn’t help that Steve is overly aware of the reasons, of why this is such a bad mixture.

Tony doesn’t understand it, can’t, not even through any fault of his own. And he’s right about part of what he says - ‘Hi, my name’s Tony Stark and I don’t like being told what to do, nice to meetcha’ - because this is just who he is, how he reacts and will probably always react to certain things.

And Steve knows that he won’t get anywhere with saying that he’s being ridiculously insensitive without even realizing, doesn’t even want to give him that kind of ammunition.

What Steve doesn’t get is what’s so hard about this, why Tony seems impossible to understand why this pisses him off. Because the arguments he brings are close to the point but miss it anyway.

Of course the fact that he felt like he couldn’t ask Tony for help not for the reasons he thinks, but for something very different he can’t possible mention though, makes things even harder.

‘Jesus Christ, sit down, Cap. Fuck me. I’ll go. Whatever, right? You’ve somehow managed to turn this into me being an asshole by assigning someone a nickname that you’ve decided to take an issue with –’

‘You’ve done that without my help,’ Steve wants to say but doesn’t, not even when Tony continues.

‘ – which, actually, by the way, that’s what I do, do you see Bruce getting his dick in a knot because I call him Big Green? - whilst ignoring the fact that I was actually offering to help you fucking find your beau. You don’t want my help? Fine, just say that next time, don’t turn something that isn’t an issue into one instead.’ I’m filling up and then heading down to the ‘shop; believe it or not, I know when my presence isn’t wanted.’

“I told you, Tony, I’m done.” He’s not going to sit back down, and he isn’t going to just pretend that none of this happened either. “You know, you could just trust me that I didn’t act to make a point of not including you. That’s what this is about, isn’t it?”

Cap’s just stood there, staring at him like some gormless asshole, and Tony can’t help but to roll his eyes, mutter a soft “whatever” under his breath and head into the kitchen to pour himself another cup of coffee. Fuck this asshole. Getting all precious over a nickname and speaking to him like he’s scolding a child, the condescending star spangled wearing prick. 

He was never going to stop calling him Binky. 

(If he’d just ignored him, like Rhodey did with his nicknames, then he would’ve moved onto something else but no, he had to take an issue with it - and on the tail end of refusing to let Tony help, which just really made things so much better - and now he was going to make sure that every moment he got, he’d use Binky. Fuck you, Captain America and your self-righteous bullshit attitude.) 

“I told you, Tony, I’m done.”

“Yeah, yeah, I heard you,” Tony muttered in reply, pouring his coffee and clutching the mug to his chest. And then, louder so Cap could hear him from the kitchen as he stirred in creamer. “Tactical retreat sounds so much better than giving up, doesn’t it? Whatever makes it easier to sleep at night. For me, it’s a fifth of whisky, but to each their own, eh?”

“You know, you could just trust me that I didn’t act to make a point of not including you. That’s what this is about, isn’t it?”

Coming out of the kitchen, he raised a brow. “What is this, kindergarten? You think I’m pissed because I’m not apart of your BFF Circle Jerk? No,” he cut a hand through the air, shaking his head. “Let’s get this clear right now. This team? Is a joke. You’re a joke. For someone who’s been lauded as being possibly ‘the greatest tactician in history’, you’re falling short. You don’t use all resources available to you and you know what, I get it - Binky Boo doesn’t wanna be found and you’re respecting that by cutting your own nose off to spite your face. Excellent. Tell me, where’s the problem in me looking regardless? If I find him, cool - you know your precious little assassin is safe and, you know, you can make sure his Hydra brainwashed ass isn’t going about killing people, we’re kinda meant to keep an eye on threats like that, don’tcha think? - and if I don’t, then cool. Nothing gained, nothing lost.”

“But no,” he added, tightening his jaw, “you’d rather sit here and chew me out like some misbehaving preschooler because I’m picking on the amputee kid. And you know what, I’m out, I’m done. I’m going down to the ‘shop to fix Natasha’s Bites because, unlike you, she knows to ask someone else for help when she can’t do something herself. So, we done here? I think we’re done here.”

[mothernightsprizedpupil-blog]

“I feel like there’s a double entendre in there but I don’t want to dig deep enough to find it.”

“Yeah, we should have. It’s been a long time since I had this much fun… or it feels like it’s been a long time. That is a lot to drink to. I’m all for it but we might need another bottle. I was going to go with the asshole that left thousands of people out in the cold and didn’t do a damn thing to help them… but I guess it’s variations on a theme.”

[tableformrstank-archive-blog]

“There’s got to be a correlation there between double entendres, wormholes and being unable to touch the sides... you’re absolutely right, let’s stop digging here.”

“I have a whole collection of bottles over there, don’t worry about being dry, I’ll take care of you. I see no problem with why we can’t toast to both. Let’s even clink glasses and everything, the whole nine yar-- there we go, now drink. Fuck it, all of it yeah. Refill? We could make a night of it, unless you’ve got plans?”

[dwfguest]

diagnostic || Tony and Vision

[dwfguest]

Vision almost waves the bottle away–it’s a gesture of camaraderie that he unfortunately not partake in–but he decides at the last moment to take the bottle and simply hold it. Perhaps detaching Tony from it will have reduce his inclination to continue drinking.

Or, at the very least, prevent him from spilling it.

“The cape is, as discussed previously, is of aerodynamic benefit for more responsive turning for those of us with a solitary source of acceleration. Ostensibly, I could generate more points of acceleration to facilitate multi-directional thrust, but–and not to speak ill of your own fondness for the practice–at the time the cape seemed a more straightforward solution.

“Particularly for an individual not yet five minutes old.”

[tableformrstank-archive-blog]

“Capes are stupid. Keep tellin’ you t’watch Incredibles. I refuse t’save you from an aeroplane engine, Vish.” He gave a narrow eyed look to the bottle in Vision’s hand that he’d yet to take a drink from. “S’in your age range.”

Making grabby hands at the bottle, he didn’t even bother to push himself up from the slumped position he’d taken on the couch since DUM-E ran away, as naked as the day he was born. “Gimme. And answer m’question. Would y’just grow one? Legions of men across the world are gunna hate you.”

[sexydowney]

pepperony + text messages

[fuckyeahtonystark]

[dailypepperony]

Tony/Pepper + One Hundred Ways to Say ‘I Love You’ [2/?]

[gil-estel]

cw: homophobic slur, abuse, Howard Stark’s A+ Parenting

Read it on ao3

[xtaticpearl-deactivated20180118]

@lavengadoraaa Have some shitty dad Howard.

[sharcncarter]

“That line was an interesting moment. At the time, the choice I was making is that [Bucky] had realized there was no way he was getting out of there, and someone was gonna die, whether it was gonna be him, Steve or Tony. When he says that line, to me, it was a turning point — he was, like, ‘Okay, I know what you want me to say, and I’m just gonna say it.’ When someone comes at you over and over again, and they can’t hear you, they can’t see you’re pleading with them, you’re trying to figure out how to get through to them and they just won’t accept it, at some point you just give in, and you go, ‘that’s right, that’s what you want.’ Of course [Bucky] didn’t remember them all.” —  Sebastian Stan

[axiejade]

Reminder that Tony Stark has a Captain America poster at Stark tower.

[jackles-lover]

Tony Stark | Take It All Away

You Alright?

 Always!

[metalpjsofdeatharchive]

Iron Man 1 Concept Art

[dailyteamcap]

[grantsattler]

A collection of MCU Tony Stark’s DAMN FUCKING RIGHT!!!! DAMN RIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS DAMN RIGHT DAMN FUCKING RIGHT™ moments, Civil War Edition™, brought to you by @knightinironarmor (p.1)

[shunasassi]

Tony Stark & tumblr text posts (part 4) (part 3) (part 2) (part 1)

[bobbedrake]

“ I’m just an old man, who cares very much about you .”

[sexydowney]

pepperony + text messages

[theironman]