Jam-Bomb; Peridot’s persistent pestering.
@jam-bomb
Peridot had always been confused and curious about how fusion works. Now that Lapis is back in her life, she wants to try to learn how to fuse with her. But at the same time, she can’t just talk to the other gems about this out of the fact that they might make fun of her. She needed to go to someone she can trust. She went to the masters of fusion (to her at least), Steven and Connie. This was when their unusual nightmare began.
Normally, Steven and Connie like to spend a lot of their alone time as Stevonnie. In a way, it saves money on food, price of admission into Funland, and more importantly, they just fuse to be with each other. And with their hectic schedules of school and gem missions, it’s these alone times that make all the difference. That was until a curious peridot began to follow them and start taking notes.
At first, Peridot’s main form of observation was passive, secretive, but mostly comical since Stevonnie always knew she was there. They tried not to pay attention to her, but then Peridot cranked up the pestering with indirect questioning towards Steven, Connie, and Stevonnie. For instance, when Stevonnie was eating Pocky while watching cartoons, Peridot crept into Steven’s room and sat right next to them. She remained silent for a while, leaving Stevonnie on edge. Finally, Stevonnie spoke.
“So…Peridot…how’s thing-” Stevonnie began to asked before being cut off by a nervous looking peridot.
“Are you doing the pocky challenge?!” Peridot blurted out. This left Stevonnie both baffled and blushing.
“W-What? No! We’re just eating snacks and watching anime. Why would I be doing that with…me.” Stevonnie voice began to trail off at the realization of that they could have been doing that without knowing it. This caused them to unfused while in middle of eating a picky stick. After unfusing, Steven and Connie were indeed eating the same stick, and were kissing each other. But out of nervousness, Connie bit on her half of the stick and moved away from Steven.
“Ooookay then! Need to head on home to do some good old homework” Connie said, getting up and walking awkwardly to the door while profusely blushing. “Yep, good old difficult homework, going to be doing that all afternoon, and definitely not screaming gleefully into my pillow!”
“Um, Connie? Are you ok?” Steven asked, noticing that her nose was bleeding a bit. “Your nose is-”
“TOTALLY DOING HOMEWORKSTEVEONOKLOVEYOUBYE!” Connie screeched while trying to hide her excitement. She then ran out of his room and out the front door, screaming ‘YEET!’ as she was doing so. Steven began to have a bad feeling about all of this.
“This is…this is going to be a thing now, isn’t it?” a deeply blushing Steven asked Peridot in a flat tone.
“Well…. were you doing the Pocky challenge?
It got worse from then on out. For an entire week, Peridot was pestering Steven and Connie about fusion. Questioning everything from ‘who’s really eating what?’ ‘who takes the lead when they’re dancing as Stevonnie?’ ‘when you’re studying, who’s actually learning?’, all the way to some uncomfortable things that they just choose not to answer. But one day, Stevonnie had enough. After asking about if they’re making out right now, Stevonnie was pushed to the edge, and decided to take delicate action.
“Peridot” Stevonnie said “I think it’s time we had…the talk.” Peridot knew what having ‘the talk’ meant. She whipped out a pad of paper and a pen, but Stevonnie shook their head and gently put the pad of paper aside, sat down, and put Peridot on their lap.
“You see, Peridot…Fusion isn’t about physical affection, or just being a tool or tactic, or even some sort of parlor trick.” Stevonnie said, sounding like a parent “In a way, fusion is all of those things, but more importantly, it’s an experience. When we’re Stevonnie, that’s what we are. We’re not making out, or doing anything…like that. We’re just Stevonnie. Fusion is not something that should be forced, it’s just something that come’s natural. And don’t worry about trying to fuse with Lapis. Sometimes, just being together or being a fusion is nearly one in the same. Do you understand, Peridot?”
Peridot was lost in thought. But then had a spark of realization.
“Physical…tool…trick…I think I do.” Peridot said.
Peridot leaped off of Steven and walked out of the house. After that Steven and Connie unfused, sunk themselves into the couch, and sighed in relieve that the awkwardness was over.
“You know, if we ever end up marrying each other and having kids, we’re going to be awesome parents.” Connie said, holding Steven’s hand.
“Or at least when you get that flower sack assignment where you have to take care of it like a child. Easy A.” Steven said.
“I don’t think they do that anymore, which is a good thing. I would have been paired off with someone in the class” Connie said, squeezing Steven’s hand. “And I can’t imagine being paired up with anyone but you. Plus, most of the classmates I have are dumb. Really dumb.”
In that moment, Lapis walked through the front door and stood in front of Steven and Connie, looking both unamused, and wearing duct tape around her chest.
“I need to have a word with you both.” Lapis spoke, turning around to show a grinning Peridot, who seemed to tape herself to lapis, like a green backpack. “It seems you’ve been giving out some really bad ideas.”
Peridot, at that point threw her hands in the air, and decried “We’ve fused!”.
Parenting would be a difficult bridge to cross, but that can wait until the far-off future. For now, Peridot would be good practice. Steven and Connie looked to each other, trying not to laugh. Their attention turned back to the duct tape fusion.
“yep. That’s fusion alright.” Connie said. “You nailed it perfectly.”
“Text book fusion, right there.” Steven said, with a smirk. “A better fusion than either Garnet and Stevonnie.”
“FUSION FOREVER!” Peridot screeched while an unamused Lapis sighed loudly.
