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I don't WANT to mask anymore

I'm already terrible at it, I know that, I'd have known it myself and my sysmates love to point it out too. I know I can't talk "like Ashe" all the time, I know I structure my sentences strangely! I know I know I know! I'm tired of pretending I don't carry around tremendous exotrauma. I'm tired of pretending that I'm not me. We've lived like this for years and now that I've started to express myself it's such torture when I can't.

I want to tell people my name and be spoken to properly and be understood. I want to be allowed a little space...

#{ds;coral}#though Ashe isn't the only host he still sort of doubles as our singletsona #he's definitely our only ANP so that's probably part of it #I'm clarifying because I name-dropped him and #I don't want him to think it was negative #it's just the situation; we typically mask ''as Ashe''#vent #system talk

I'm sorry for phrasing this so roughly but the fact that I have to see "fruit" referring to gay people almost every day and nobody tags for it is so fucked up. Why does "q slur" have more legitimacy. This word makes me feel like I'm in danger,

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